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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Beyond - Legends Taerlyndan [post-NJO AU; Jaina, Jacen, Kyp, Tahiri, Zekk] On Hiatus

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Idrelle_Miocovani, Aug 23, 2007.

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  1. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    Jedi-Ant: I plan on getting caught up with this sometime today... just so you know.

    Looking forwards to your comments. :D

    Ceillean: Aw..poor Kyp. They crushed his X-Wing.

    Yep. He's kind of stuck and he's really not happy about it.

    Could you put me on the PM list, please?

    Of course! :D

    I really like what I've read so far. Especially the Kyp scenes.

    LOL! Thanks!

    *whispers* Although I don't think it wise being an ass towards the rulers, Kyp. *whispers*

    [face_laugh]

    That would probably help. ;) But Kyp's not taking them seriously right now so he's going to be annoying the heck out of them, especially Gwenael.

    Rosa-Belle: Awww...finallz we are gtting to Kyp

    [face_laugh]

    Yep.

    great update, and Kyp is so Kyp-like...

    Thanks! Glad that I'm getting his characterization right. :)

    poor guy...trapped on this planet..but at least he remembers wh he is

    Yep. Things are actually looking up for him. He could be in a worse situation... like Zekk. [face_whistling] Zekk's definitely in the worse scenario out of all of them. [face_devil] ;)

    w-righter: Thanks! [:D]

    Nat: Yeah, you do sort of have to feel sorry for him. :p

    Glad you like Gwenael -- we'll be seeing a lot of her, and she's going to get pretty irritated with our favourite Jedi Master. :p
     
  2. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    CHAPTER FOUR

    Lochaland


    ---

    Illyssia

    Tahiri blinked as rain streaked into her eyes. Squeezing them shut, she pulled up the hood of her borrowed cloak to protect her face from the thickly falling rain. It had been raining off and on all day as they trekked through the thick Illyssian forest; only recently had the rain begun to fall faster and harder.

    When her companions had originally announced that it would take them less than a day to reach Lochaland ? whatever that was ? they had severely miscalculated. Over the past three days, they had wound their way through the meandering forest paths. More than once they were forced to stop while Tahiri caught her breath. Since awakening from her unconsciousness, she had found that she exhausted herself easily, something which both humiliated and irritated her. Che, the Captain of the Forest Guard who had rescued her from her crashed ship, had offered to carry her like he had when she had been unconscious. Tahiri always refused ? she would not allow herself that embarrassment, even though she knew they would probably travel faster.

    ?Tahiri?? a kind voice asked.

    She turned to see Tatienne?s concerned face, cast in shadow by her hood, looking at her gently.

    ?Are you all right?? the Sorceress continued. ?Do you need to rest again??

    Tahiri pursed her lips and shook her head. She hadn?t realized that she had stopped walking. They were halfway up a fairly steep hill; the path was bordered by trees with drooping branches and rocks lodged in the ground provided dozens of chances for her to trip and fall. Yes, she was tired. She could use a rest ? she could feel the muscles in her legs beginning to protest the uphill climb. However, she would not allow herself another rest.

    ?No, I?m not tired,? Tahiri lied.

    Tatienne looked at her through narrowed eyes. Tahiri could tell that she knew she was lying. However, the Sorceress did not say anything about it; instead, she merely nodded and continued up the trail.

    Tahiri followed slowly behind her, her feet almost shuffling along the path. She was becoming very aware of the fact that there was a leak in her boot ? her big toe was becoming rather wet and cold. Shutting her exhaustion out of her mind, Tahiri walked swiftly up the path. Around her, dressed in brown and green clothing that provided strong camouflage in the forest, walked half of the Forest Guard. In total, there were sixteen men, plus Che and Tatienne. Eight men of the Forest Guard were ahead, scouting the road for any dangers under the eye of the second-in-command, Ramon. Che had stayed behind with the rest of his men and Tatienne.

    They were a strange group of people, Tahiri had decided. They were very secretive. Though they were kind to her, they had not told her much about the land they were traveling. Most of what Tahiri knew about Illyssia was derived from eavesdropping on their conversations. It seemed that the Forest Guard had stumbled upon her in her crashed X-Wing while scouting the land for spies from a place called Elion and other dangers. The men had mentioned such things as hydras and pegasi, although who or what they were, Tahiri had no idea.

    Despite the cold rain and the weakness she felt in her body, Tahiri was happy. She felt curiosity more than anything else ? curiosity for this world. She wanted to learn about it. Illyssia was beautiful. There was something about the way the dark green trees swayed in the wind, the way the rivers laughed as they tumbled down rocky hills, the way the wind whispered through the trees that called out to her. Though her body screamed that the journey was long, Tahiri?s mind, so enthralled by the landscape around her, could only take the sights in with awe.

    The company continued to travel for some time, the rain drenching them even though they were somewhat protected by the leafy canopy above. At the top of the hill, they were rejoined by Ramon and his scouts, who spoke briefly with Che. After several minutes of rapid conversation, Che ordered that the entire
     
  3. NYCitygurl

    NYCitygurl Manager Emeritus star 9 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jul 20, 2002
    Poor Tahiri!! Still mourning for Anakin :(

    I liked the bit with the unicorn -- very sweet!!!
     
  4. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    Yes, poor Tahiri. :( She's going to have some very interesting things to deal with with on Taerlyndan... not that I said "interesting", which doesn't necessarily mean "good."

    Glad you liked the unicorn! Illyssia houses a large majority of the magical creatures on Taerlyndan. There's others scattered throughout the land and mountains, but Illyssia is where you find the unicorns, pegasi (winged horses) and other such fun mythological creatures. :D

    Thanks for reading and betaing, Nat! [:D]
     
  5. w-righter

    w-righter Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Jun 17, 2007
    I simply loved the 4th chapter! :D I'm sorry for Tahiri, though. :(
     
  6. Jedi-Ant

    Jedi-Ant Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 3, 2007
    Argh, I'm so sorry I haven't replied to this yet!! [face_blush] [face_blush] :( I've been waiting to comment until I had time to do my usual big replies I do, but time is something that's slipping away from me more and more these days, so I'll just say that I really enjoyed your last couple of updates very much. :D

    You have such a wonderful writing style, Idri, and you definitely have a knack for telling and setting out a good tale. And I love the extra sketches you've added, it really helps keep track of things. In fact, I've printed them off with the rest of your fic, so I can re-read over it when I'm in bed. :) :D

    Anyway, I'm really busy these days, so I don't get on the boards as often I like anymore, but I really don't want to miss any of your wonderful tale, so please keep sending me PM's when you update and I will comment when I can, however small they may be. :)

    I just wanted you to know that I'm still reading and enjoying, and can't wait for it to continue. :)


    Ant. ]-}
     
  7. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    w-righter: Thanks for reading! [:D] Yes, I'm feeling sorry for Tahiri, too. She's just as confused as the rest of them, but she's still dealing with Anakin's death...

    Jedi-Ant: Hi Ant! [:D] Don't worry about not replying earlier -- as much as DRL sucks, RL is much more important than commenting on fanfics. :)

    You have such a wonderful writing style, Idri, and you definitely have a knack for telling and setting out a good tale.

    Awww, thanks! [face_blush] [face_blush] I'm really glad that you're enjoying it so much! I know that it's probably not every person's cup of tea, so I'm happy that you're really liking it! :D

    And I love the extra sketches you've added, it really helps keep track of things. In fact, I've printed them off with the rest of your fic, so I can re-read over it when I'm in bed.

    LOL! From the amount of fantasy worlds I write about in original fic, I kind of guessed that a map would be needed, so I'm glad that you're using them! :D I've been thinking of re-scanning in the south-eastern map again, because some of the names got cut off a little bit. :)

    Anyway, I'm really busy these days, so I don't get on the boards as often I like anymore, but I really don't want to miss any of your wonderful tale, so please keep sending me PM's when you update and I will comment when I can, however small they may be.

    Will do! Always glad to hear that you'll still be reading, even if you only have time to lurk. [:D]




    [b]CHAPTER FIVE

    [i]The Chains of Midgar[/i][/b]

    ---

    [b][u]Elion[/u][/b]

    Zekk slowly inhaled and exhaled as he sat on the dirt floor of the dark hut, meditating.

    Or ? to be more exact ? [i]trying[/i] to meditate.

    For three days he had put up with staying in the tiny, cramped hut, day and night, unable to go anywhere. After his antics on his first day, he had promptly collapsed because of the pain his burns had given him. He had spent his first day unconscious, only to wake up at the prodding of the scarred girl who he had accidentally punched. She had brought him a small bowl of watery stew filled with questionable contents. It was only because his stomach had been growling so much that Zekk had chosen to ignore that fact and eat it.

    His next two days were not much better than his first. He had spent entire days and nights in a healing trance, trying to patch up the severe burns he had sustained when his X-Wing had crashed. His strength was returned, but he was low on food. The girl appeared now and then, with no set time, bringing him small fractions of stew or bread. She always appeared nervous whenever she arrived, pursing her lips and fiddling with her braids. She barely spoke to Zekk when she brought him food; when she did speak, it was to give him warnings.

    And so, here he sat, on the dirt floor of a dilapidated old hut, trying to meditate his way out of his situation. He had considered slipping out of the hut in search of food, but had decided against it since he would probably send the poor girl into hysterics if he left.

    He had yet to figure out what kind of planet this was. He knew it couldn?t be pleasant, from the scars and brands his caretaker bore, but that didn?t worry him. He did, after all, have much experience with unpleasant things. During the brief moments when he had been awake inbetween trances, he had heard the sounds of clattering iron, men grunting, and people yelling or screaming. None of those sounds boded well.

    [i]I should just leave,[/i] he told himself, standing up. [i]If a scarred, weak girl can survive out there, a healed Jedi ? even a hungry Jedi ? should be perfectly fine.[/i]

    He was half-way to the exit when the door to the hut inched open so it was just wide enough to admit the thin-framed girl. She quickly closed the door and turned to him. Though it was dark, Zekk could still see her frightened expression thanks to the sunlight the holes in the walls admitted.

    ?What are you doing?? she whispered frantically. ?You need to stay here, you?re st
     
  8. NYCitygurl

    NYCitygurl Manager Emeritus star 9 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jul 20, 2002
    This is my favorite chapter so far. I'm usually not a big Zekk fan, but I really liked this. You do a great job showing the change from annoyance at her rescuer and concentration on himself to his determination to fight to free her and the slaves. Really cool chapter :D
     
  9. Krayt-Eagle

    Krayt-Eagle Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Feb 1, 2007
    [face_thinking]

    ... I have a baaaaaaad feeling about this... [face_worried]



    Yet, it's a feeling I'm quite looking forward to. :D Stellar fic! =D= Your plot is quite unique; I know for certain I've never seen any storyline at all similar. Plus, your writing and descriptions are grand. You hit each character's personality extremely well. I'm hooked :D

    Anyways... keep doin' watchya doin', cuz you good at it [:D]
     
  10. iamobiwan1970

    iamobiwan1970 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Aug 23, 2005
    Please add me to the PM list!

    I am very intrigued!

    I think each Jedi is going to have a very different experience! Wow!

    Now I am quite worried about Zekk!

    The idea that their are those with magical powers intrigues me. Wathcing how the Jedi and the Mages "relate" will be interesting!

     
  11. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    Nat: This is my favorite chapter so far. I'm usually not a big Zekk fan, but I really liked this.

    Yay! I'm glad -- I've never really written Zekk before, so I'm glad that it seems that I'm doing all right. :p

    You do a great job showing the change from annoyance at her rescuer and concentration on himself to his determination to fight to free her and the slaves. Really cool chapter

    Thanks! Zekk's story is a little more tense than the other's -- mostly because he's in a really bad situation in comparison.

    Okay... Jacen's not doing too well at the moment either, having just been attacked by goblins and left for dead in the desert, but other than being very exhausted and a more than a little dehydrated, he's not too bad. :p

    Thanks for reading and betaing, Nat! [:D]

    Krayt-Eagle: Hey, you! [:D] Glad to see you! :D

    ... I have a baaaaaaad feeling about this...

    Funny, so do I. :p

    Yet, it's a feeling I'm quite looking forward to. grin Stellar fic! applause Your plot is quite unique; I know for certain I've never seen any storyline at all similar. Plus, your writing and descriptions are grand. You hit each character's personality extremely well. I'm hooked grin

    Thanks so much for your comments! :D I haven't seen anything with a plot line even remotely like this one before, either. Makes me kind of nervous, because it's really different. [face_worried] There's a lot of potential for things to go horribly wrong and for everything to end up in a train wreck, but what the heck. :p I'm enjoying myself. 8-}

    Anyways... keep doin' watchya doin', cuz you good at it

    Thanks for reading! [:D] [:D]

    iamobiwan1970: Please add me to the PM list!

    Sure, no problems! :)

    I am very intrigued!

    Yay! [face_dancing]

    I think each Jedi is going to have a very different experience! Wow!

    Yep. This is really more like five books in one, since they won't be meeting up with each other for quite some time. :p And when they do, the chances of them recognizing each other immediately aren't going to be very big. :p

    Now I am quite worried about Zekk!

    So am I. [face_worried]

    The idea that their are those with magical powers intrigues me. Wathcing how the Jedi and the Mages "relate" will be interesting!

    Not to mention the Druids and the Sorcerers and the Healers as well. :D Taerlyndan's quite a different planet. And there's good Mages and bad Mages -- so our Jedi are going to be in for quite an interesting time. Mwhahaha. [face_devil]

    Thanks for reading! :D
     
  12. Jedi-Ant

    Jedi-Ant Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 3, 2007
    I agree with NYCitygurl, this was my favourite chapter yet as well (and that's saying something, because the last chapter was "Tahiri" and she's my all-time favourite SW character)!! =D=

    I've never been a Zekk fan - never ever... in fact, I may even go so far as to say I pick on the poor guy quite a bit. But I love him here! :D You've done such an awesome job at portraying him, and he's so much a better character here in just one chapter, than he is in the entire NJO (IMO). =D=

    And I just love his conviction here - reminds me of a young Anakin Skywalker, before the whole "sand people" thing, and his little trip to the darkside themepark. :p

    Brilliant job, as always! This is such a wonderful, fun, enjoyable fic, and I'm loving every word of it! [face_love]



    Ant. ]-}
     
  13. Krayt-Eagle

    Krayt-Eagle Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Feb 1, 2007
    ^



    ...Stories too kriffin' good to be burried down to page three...


    :D :cool:



    [face_peace]
     
  14. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    Ant: I agree with NYCitygurl, this was my favourite chapter yet as well (and that's saying something, because the last chapter was "Tahiri" and she's my all-time favourite SW character)!!

    Awww, thanks! [:D]

    I've never been a Zekk fan - never ever... in fact, I may even go so far as to say I pick on the poor guy quite a bit. But I love him here! grin You've done such an awesome job at portraying him, and he's so much a better character here in just one chapter, than he is in the entire NJO (IMO).

    :eek:

    [:D]

    Thanks! I'm glad you liked the way I've written him -- it's the way I see Zekk, so it makes me really happy that a non-Zekk fan likes him here! :D Thanks!

    And I just love his conviction here - reminds me of a young Anakin Skywalker, before the whole "sand people" thing, and his little trip to the darkside themepark.

    [face_laugh]

    Yeah, I can see that too. :p Thanks!

    Brilliant job, as always! This is such a wonderful, fun, enjoyable fic, and I'm loving every word of it!

    Thanks for reading!!

    Krayt-Eagle: LOL, thanks!




    [b]CHAPTER SIX

    [i]A Touch of Destiny[/i][/b]

    ---

    [b][u]Dwyn[/u][/b]

    Jaina sat cross-legged on the bank of a babbling brook, watching the fast-flowing waters rush over the rounded stones in the stream. Sunlight glowed through the leafy canopy above, shining down on the rippling waters of the brook. Pursing her lips, Jaina?s fingers played with a tuft of grass, gently tugging on it and eventually pulling it out. Absentmindedly, she threw the grass into the stream and watched the current carry it away.

    It had been some days since Arianrhod, Taranis and Tristan had brought her to the Tree of Lyr and she had felt that voice call out to her, whispering her name over and over again. Since then, her mind had been opened to the sounds and vibrations of life around her ? through some mystical sense that was as much a part of her as her own sight, she could feel the rhythms of this new world around her, penetrating her, filling her with energy that she could not explain, even to herself.

    It confused her. She had a feeling that most people shouldn?t be able to sense what she did. Was this something from her past, coming back to haunt her? What strange abilities could it enable her to do? Something in the back of her mind, in the blank spot that she could never penetrate, told her that she was capable of something both terrifying and wonderful. But what could it be?

    Tugging up another tuft of grass, she threw that into the river and watched it float away. There was so much that she didn?t know ? so many things that she [i]wanted[/i] to know. She didn?t know much about this world and she barely knew herself. This was what ?unfair? truly meant.

    But then ? who said that the world was ever fair?

    Exhaling a quick breath of air, she raised a hand absentmindedly, holding it out so that her palm faced the brook. With the world around her breathing energy into her, she closed her eyes and concentrated on a rock that lay on the bottom of the stream. Slowly, she tilted her hand, feeling the shape of the rock through her sixth sense, forcing it upwards in her mind?s eye.

    Jaina cracked open one eye and gasped in surprise. The rock balanced in mid-air for a moment before plummeting back into the brook, where it landed with a loud [i]splash[/i] and sank to the bottom.

    Something nudged her shoulder and a soft whicker sounded in her ear. Jaina turned her head slightly to the right and felt her lips curl upwards in a smile. Finnian was nudging his angular, white head against her shoulder. Something in his dark eyes seemed to tell her that he understood what she had been trying to do.

    ?You know,? Jaina murmured, rubbing the side of the horse?s neck, ?I wish I knew what I was doing. Do you think you could tell me??

    Finnian merely whinnied and bumped his nose into her shoulder again, before turning around and trotting downwards along the stream to where Briccriu stood, grazing the fresh green grass.

    Jain
     
  15. Jedi-Ant

    Jedi-Ant Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 3, 2007
    First! :p



    [I'll be back!]



    [face_peace]
     
  16. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    [face_laugh]

    I'm sure you'll be back at some point. :p And I really need to get working on that next chapter... Jacen's getting very dehydrated at the moment. :p
     
  17. Jedi-Ant

    Jedi-Ant Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 3, 2007
    Yes, I'll be back. :)

    And as for Jacen... leave him there a little longer... make him suffer! [face_devil] :p
     
  18. Earthknight

    Earthknight Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 3, 2002
    I've chapter one and two. Very impressive so far, Idrelle. I'm definitely going to keep reading on. I like stories that feature a properly characterized Tahiri( I'm not a fan of the Tahiri in LotF). I think she's so cute.
     
  19. Jedi-Ant

    Jedi-Ant Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 3, 2007
    Without much of a choice, Jaina followed Igraine towards the house, her mind whirling. A touch of destiny? what had Morgause meant? What kind of destiny? And these references of Jedi? she had been called a daughter ?of princesses and smugglers and warriors.?

    What could that possibly mean?

    Perhaps Igraine could give her the answers to her burning questions ? hopefully sometime before her mind exploded.


    Poor Jaina! That certainly is a lot to take in all at once.. looking forward to seeing what kind of answers she gets from Igraine (love the name, too, BTW!) :D

    You're doing a fantastic job with all the Jedi characterizations in this. =D= They're all so true to how I think they should be, and it's just so refreshing to read them like they used to be before LotF.

    Thanks for the PM, and so sorry I'm so late in replying. [face_blush] I love your story.. it's one of my favourites. [face_peace]



    Ant. ]-}
     
  20. w-righter

    w-righter Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Jun 17, 2007
    Good work. Very good! =D=
    I missed quite of the story, but reading it up in one piece actaully made it more interesting. :)
     
  21. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    So, Christmas is over with and I'm officially on break. That means I have more time to write (aka, I'm procrastinating on homework [face_whistling] ), and thanks to all the lovely CDs I got from my parents as presents, I have lots of new inspiration for this fic. I just finished the next chapter [face_dancing] and it's being betaed, so you can expect a new update soon. Thanks for hanging in there -- it means a lot to me! :D [:D] I hope you come back to read. I know it's been a while. :)




    [b]EarthKnight[/b]

    [i]I've chapter one and two. Very impressive so far, Idrelle.[/i]

    Thanks, EarthKnight! I try. :) Glad to see that people think I'm getting the characters right! :D

    [i]I'm definitely going to keep reading on. I like stories that feature a properly characterized Tahiri( I'm not a fan of the Tahiri in LotF). I think she's so cute.[/i]

    Tahiri's adorable, that's probably why I like writing her so much. :p I haven't read LotF (didn't even get through DN), so I shouldn't be influenced by the LotF interpretation of her. :)

    [b]Jedi-Ant[/b]

    [i]Poor Jaina! That certainly is a lot to take in all at once.. looking forward to seeing what kind of answers she gets from Igraine (love the name, too, BTW!)[/i]

    Yes, poor girl's having a hard time. She's awfully confused. Igraine should be able to help her though. The Druids are intelligent -- we just have to hope that Morgause won't get on Jaina's nerves too much. I can say that she annoys Tristan a little too much from time to time. Arianrhod's probably the only one who can really put up with her. :p

    Glad you like the name. King Arthur-inspired. Well, actually [i]Mists of Avalon[/i] inspired. [face_whistling] Though I haven't really read it yet. [face_blush]

    [i]You're doing a fantastic job with all the Jedi characterizations in this. applause They're all so true to how I think they should be, and it's just so refreshing to read them like they used to be before LotF.[/i]

    Thanks! As I said to EarthKnight, I haven't read LotF yet so I haven't had the chance to be "corrupted." :p ;)

    [i]Thanks for the PM, and so sorry I'm so late in replying.[/i]

    You're welcome, and don't feel bad! I'm an awfully slow writer... as demonstrated by the fact that this hasn't been updated since October! Whoops... [face_blush] DRL got in the way! *points accusatory finger at DRL*

    [i]I love your story.. it's one of my favourites.[/i]

    Awwww. [face_blush] Glad that you like it! It's... erm... different... to put it lightly... :p so I've been kind of worried about how it's being received. Hope you keep reading! [face_hugs]

    [b]w-righter[/b]

    [i]Good work. Very good![/i]

    Thanks! [face_hugs]

    [i]I missed quite of the story, but reading it up in one piece actaully made it more interesting.[/i]

    Glad you're enjoying it! :)

    --Idri [face_rose]



     
  22. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    CHAPTER SEVEN

    Desert


    ---

    Housûn

    Jacen?s first sensation was that of a blinding headache. Slowly, he began to realize that the pain did not stop at his head, but extended throughout his entire body with an aggravating persistence. Luckily, though he was still very sore, he no longer felt exhausted. On the other hand, to add to his discomfort, a burning thirst was growing in his throat. Slowly, he sat up stiffly, wincing in pain and regretted the action immediately as his head began to spin. Clutching one hand to his forehead, he waited until his stomach had settled down and then opened his eyes.

    The brilliant sun striking off the sand was almost too bright to bear; he had to wait while his eyes slowly adjusted to the glare. As he waited, wincing in pain, he attempted to brush off some of the sand that caked his skin and clothes. Unfortunately, it was stuck to the dried blood that covered the sides of his neck and arms. Jacen was suddenly aware of how dirty he was and wished fervently that there was a river or someplace nearby where he could bathe.

    Not very likely, he thought darkly. Not in this Force-forsaken desert.

    Keeping a hand raised to his brow to ward off some of the sun?s rays, he looked around at his surroundings. Jacen felt the pit of his stomach almost drop out. He was utterly alone. There wasn?t a sight of a person for miles in any direction. All he could see, right to the blue horizon, was flat, sandy desert ? and the unmoving bodies of the dead, green-skinned aliens that had attacked the caravan.

    Jacen swore.

    After several minutes of exhausting an extensive vocabulary of swear words (one that even included some Yuuzhan Vong), Jacen stood up and kicked the ground forcefully, sending a shower of sand shooting out several feet in front of him. Growling in anger, he turned around and examined his situation again.

    He was trapped in a desert without any food, water or technology. There was no one near-by except for dead aliens and he was going to need water very soon. He had no idea where the nearest town or village was and didn?t even know what direction to go in.

    Force help me, if I ever get out of this?

    He wished Jaina was here. She would know what to do, and even if she didn?t, she would act as though she did. But he didn?t even know where his twin was at the moment ? she couldn?t possibly help him now. He was on his own.

    Knowing that he wouldn?t have a chance of survival if he didn?t do something, Jacen closed his eyes and tried to sweep his surroundings with the Force. He found nothing but sand. Sighing, Jacen opened his eyes again and began trudging off in a direction picked at random. Judging from the position of the sun, it was either east or west ? he wasn?t exactly sure of which way this planet was turning.

    Much to Jacen?s irritation, it seemed that the battle in which he had been knocked unconscious had been extensive and stretched out in all directions. For what seemed like an eternity, Jacen trudged through the battlefield, kicking up blood-smeared sand with his boots as he walked, his nose wrinkling at the foul stench of the black goblin blood. The bodies were all torn and mutilated, hacked to pieces by swords and burned by magical fire. With a shudder, Jacen was suddenly reminded of the time of his captivity and the horrors he had witnessed on the Yuuzhan Vong-captured Coruscant.

    Jacen lost track of time as he walked through the desert. Slowly, his breath became more ragged, the burning thirst in his throat more intense. Sweat dripped down his brow, frequently sliding into his eyes and down his nose. The small relief that came when a light breeze blew across the desert was quenched as it blew sand into his eyes, grit which he then tried, unsuccessfully, to rub out. He didn?t even notice when he left the battlefield behind and continued out into never-ending desert.

    This must be what it?s like to live on Tatooine, Jacen thought. Only about ten times worse.

    He was stumbling now
     
  23. iamobiwan1970

    iamobiwan1970 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Aug 23, 2005
    I was wondering when the natives would see the use of the Force as magic. Figures Jacen would be the one to glow in the night!

    This place has many Egyptian sounding names, I like that.

    I'm really wondering what the Circle of Ra people will think of Jacen when they meet him. And, he better learn their language fast if he wants to survive!

    Good update! =D= Please keep the PM's coming.

     
  24. NYCitygurl

    NYCitygurl Manager Emeritus star 9 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jul 20, 2002
    Awesome update!! I like the Egyptian-sounding names as well.

    And these people are giving me a weird vibe, like none of them are entirely trustworthy. I can't wait to see if I'm right (or if you'll let me drag it out of you :p ).

    Lovely job!! Glad you're writing again [:D]
     
  25. Jedi-Ant

    Jedi-Ant Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 3, 2007
    Jacen?s first sensation was that of a blinding headache. Slowly, he began to realize that the pain did not stop at his head, but extended throughout his entire body with an aggravating persistence. Luckily, though he was still very sore, he no longer felt exhausted. On the other hand, to add to his discomfort, a burning thirst was growing in his throat. Slowly, he sat up stiffly, wincing in pain and regretted the action immediately as his head began to spin. Clutching one hand to his forehead, he waited until his stomach had settled down and then opened his eyes.

    The brilliant sun striking off the sand was almost too bright to bear; he had to wait while his eyes slowly adjusted to the glare. As he waited, wincing in pain, he attempted to brush off some of the sand that caked his skin and clothes. Unfortunately, it was stuck to the dried blood that covered the sides of his neck and arms. Jacen was suddenly aware of how dirty he was and wished fervently that there was a river or someplace nearby where he could bathe.

    Not very likely, he thought darkly. Not in this Force-forsaken desert.

    Keeping a hand raised to his brow to ward off some of the sun?s rays, he looked around at his surroundings. Jacen felt the pit of his stomach almost drop out. He was utterly alone. There wasn?t a sight of a person for miles in any direction. All he could see, right to the blue horizon, was flat, sandy desert ? and the unmoving bodies of the dead, green-skinned aliens that had attacked the caravan.

    Jacen swore.


    I loved this opening!!! :D =D= :D So very vivid, I really have a feel for the place in just a few short paragraphs! =D=

    I'm so happy to see you back posting on this fabulous tale, Idri! [face_dancing] [face_dancing] I missed it in the few months of hiatus, but can more than sympathize with you about DRL getting in the way (and DWB) :( [:D] It's a pain, I know, but don't worry, I'll always still be waiting for your PM's, so by all means keep sending 'em my way. ;)

    I, too, feel that the natives aren't as trustworthy as they seem... they speak of this "circle of ra" place, and I can't help but think something bad is going to come from Jacen's visit there. [face_thinking] [face_worried]

    Anyway, another fine update!! It was well worth the wait. :)


    Ant. ]-}
     
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