Tallon's Silly BBQ Sauce Thread

....Tallon, looking suspiciously in either directions, sits nervously at the bar. A swish of a purple cape at a table catches his eye. Mara Jade is already sipping some Juri juice. Tallon moves closer.

Tallon : Your shipment hasn't arrived yet.

Jade : I know. We've tried to get the materials available, but no one is complying. The Empire has all the routes blocked with stormtroopers boarding my transports. It's worse than traffic cops stopping for inspection stickers.

Tallon : I've hired you to get me that and...

Jade :...(cutting him off) No need to get your little bantha in a knot. Don't worry. I've the best slave workers scouting for routes around the galaxy. We'll evade the inspections if we have to, but it will cost you.

Tallon : Ack! How much? I've already spent my wad of six months credits at Rib Fest.

Jade : Tough.

Tallon : Ribs? Sure were.

Jade: You want the best BBQ sauce in the galaxy, hon? I'm the only one who can deliver. By the way, keep that blaster between your filthy tentacles down there where I can see it.

Tallon: Ok. But, don't try to commandeer my transports and substitute the shipment with some slacker lacqer like Cattlemans to cut corners either. Even brain-dead stormtroopers can tell the difference between that'n John Boy and Billy's. I think. Now where I'm I going to get that extra bunch of credits?

....... to be continued....

 

Me thinks that a bottle of BBQ sauce would be easier to ship than a box of silly donuts...

Get 'em Jade! Make him pay dearly for that stuff... heh

 

....mumbling to himself, Tallon gulps down the last of his spiked juri juice, running his sleeve over his mouth. He shifts his eye over to the smuggler talking to Mara Jade. They glance disapprovingly at Tallon momentarily, then go back to hushed wispers... [/i}

Mara: I expect it there by tomorrow, or my friend over there will be pressured to use other means necessary to ...ahem...help you.

Gra-beedo: What do I look like? A miracle Worker?

Mara: No, you look, you slimy Garindon! You are a long nosed Kubaz. A walking ediphaunt, and one that could use a peanut stuffed hard up that nose of yours. If that galactic transport of that stuff is not there ....

Gra-beedo: What's a jedi doing with a scumbag like him, anyway? I'm a spy, not a grocer. Give me time! I know I owe Tallon a favor. He covered for me on that presentation for the empress of Kuat. I made a lot of credits. But I'm better snooping, not shopping.

Mara: Time is a luxury you never had. Now shuffle up, Snuffleupagus, and get that BBQ sauce to R2Detroit on the next trade transport, before I yank that nose up over your head and make you whistle a new theme song. See this lightsaber? I'm in control and I know how to use it....

Gra-beedo: I heard from my info broker the galactic transport is set to arrive tomorrow.
One bottle of yummy JohnBoy and Billy BBQ sauce. Perfect for grilling wampa, sarlacc, or any delicacy in the galaxy.

Mara: It'd better be, or I'll be grilling Garindan. and (fingering the lightsaber) I have just the thing to get perfect slices from you... chopped and ground!! if I perferred...with some cheap Kraft BBQ sauce. I hear your snout is the most tender, am I right?

....Tallon, overhearing the conversation, chuckles at overhearing the pleasant turn of events in his favor, drums his fingers on the table to the tune of a familiar march... to be continued....

 

ship me some authentic whitey one bites and i'll ship you the BBQ sauce. ;p

(if you are a michigan native and you don't know what are whitey one bites, shame on you!)

PS - I was born in Grand Rapids and lived in Novi till age 3, thats how I know. I even know what Novi means. ;p

 

You can buy those in the store in the frozen food section now ya know dinox.

And unless you can get 'em fresh, or so I've been told (I can't eat 'em), they're not really worth eating...

 

i like them fresh as opposed to the ones you get from the freeze section. *shudder*

 

Tallon licking his chops, thinking about this with Stubbs BBQ sauce... Maybe I'll become Sith lord of the BBQ....