Beyond - Legends Temptation: an entry for the Crack-Pairing challenge. Corran/Lumiya *Author Replies Now Up*

Title: Temptation
Author: Handmaiden_Azul
Timeframe: Pre DN or during, not quite sure.
Notes: An entry for the Crack Pairing Roulette challenge, the couple is Corran Horn and Lumiya.

Corran came to consciousness slowly. His whole body felt like herd of banthas had run over him. He tried to move his limbs only to find himself pinned to the wall by metal brackets. The distant rumble of engines informed him that he was on a ship of some kind.

He groaned and shut his eyes as the door to his cell opened letting in harsh light from the hallway. Wincing, he slowly opened his eyes to reveal a lady dressed in black standing before him. She was stunningly beautiful, but in a very, very wrong way. Corran realized she could only be one person-Lumiya. She spoke with an amused smile, "Hello, Jedi Horn."

"How do you know my name"� he managed to get out of his aching jaw.

"I know every Jedi in Luke Skywalker's Order, Master Horn," her smile became if possible even more amused, "including your two children, Jysella and Valin."

Corran's eyes came alive with fire, "Are you threatening me?"

Lumiya smiled and stroked his cheek with a cold hand. "Ah, there is anger in you, yet. The Jedi haven't completely succeeded in wiping it out. You are angry over the death of your wife, Mirax. Cut down before your very eyes and you could do nothing about. Tell me, who do you hate more? Your enemies for murdering her... or yourself for being unable to stop them? Lumiya paused,"Now you're afraid it'll happen again. You're afraid of having your heart further ripped in pieces as another loved one dies in your arms?" Lumiya planted a cold kiss on Corran's cheek, "Join me and I will see that it never happens again."

"Never!" he replied with fervor.

Lumiya nodded "I expected as much. Very well, there are other ways of convincing." Lumiya bent her head toward Corran meeting his lips with hers. Against his will, Corran found himself responding to the heady pressure of her lips on his. He told himself to stop but there was something so darkly enticing about her that he found he could not resist. Lumiya pulled away from Corran with a pleased look.

"Your passion surprises me. You should really learn to use it." Lumiya got up and turned to leave, "Think about what I've said, Master Jedi and consider my offer. You would be surprised at what the dark side has to offer." Then she was gone and Corran was left in the dark once more.

P.s. This is my first fanfic, so please don't be too critical! Hope you like it!

 

Oh my gosh! What a crack pairing you got. You did an awesome job!

Congrats on writing your first fanfic!

 

Wow, what a tough pairing! But you did an admirable job with it! Wonderful!

 

Thanks so much!!!

 

Congrats on your first fanfic.

Poor Corran. I wonder who cut down his wife and where his children are now. I hope he doesn't take Lumiya up on her offer. *shudders at the thought*

Great job. I agree that these two are really hard to put together.

 

I agree. You did an awesome job. However, the paragraphing makes the fic very difficult to read. Try starting a new paragraph every time a different person speaks.

 

A very creepy viggie, Handmaiden_Azul, and a good entry for our challenge. Congrads on it being your first fic!





While the formatting is a little tough to read, as you continue to post more on the boards, you'll figure out the easiest ways to get them posted for easy reading. If you'd like help for your stories for formatting, drop me a PM Or check out the beta reader index; lots of good stuff in there!

 

The content is great. If possible, PM me on the next updated please.

Very dark, eerie scene. As with the above, just sort out the formatting and you're golden!

 

I took your advice SilSolo! I hope it is easier to read now!

 

Up!

 

Double lines between paragraphs - leaving an empty line, since tabs don't post well - is best for formatting.

But the fic itself? You did a great job with it. Not an easy pairing and you handled it well.

 

Your wish is my command!

 

princess_of_naboo:Thanks! Yeah it was pretty wacked.

VaderLVR64: As I said before," Thanks a bunch for the praise!" or something to that effect

Lola64: Well, since initially I wasn't sure where to stick it timewise, I sort of made the enemy purposefully anonymous..And whether he takes Lumiya up on her offer is for you to decide.Thanks so much for commenting!

SilSolo: Thanks so much for the constructive criticism! It helped me a bunch!

Jade_Max: *steps up to microphone* "Hello, everybody. I'd like to introduce you to the fine lady who is the responsible for setting me on this crack 'ship. Without her I'd still be trying to think up something to post on this board! *gives Jade_Max

TheTatooineRexTrader: "Very dark, eerie scene" ThanksI don't think I will be updating though unless a plot bunny bites me real hard. It's meant to be more of a vignette.

Eleventh_Guard: Thanks so much for the advice. It looks much better now if I do say so myself.

 

Very interesting. Pretty well written. And definitely a crack pairing. I know wrote a crack pairing recently( it was a Ben/Alema story but it's not part of the challenge). But anyway, very interesting and good.

 

I'd just like to let everyone to know that I am writing another part to this! Problem is, I don't really have a beta! So volunteers would be good!

Edit: I got a Master so I can now type up the next part of my story!