Amph The 2015 Box Office Bloodbath (And the winner is...)

Stop being so bionormative.

 

I'm assuming like every real Star Wars fan that R2D2 is self-aware.

 

I, like every other rational viewer, assume that R2D2 is an over-sized Roomba that filmmakers keep shoe-horning into the series.

 

Roomba's don't purposefully do obtuse.

 

Wocky, they aren't alive in that they're fiction, but the movies clearly point to them being complex, emotional individuals who shouldn't be treated as disposable property. It's almost as though they're slaves or something.

 

Ah, so the ST is about the great droid uprising, then? Gotcha.

 

that is painful to read

 

Stupid positions make me descend into grammatical incoherence, sorry.

 

So how exactly did you conclusively solve one of the biggest open problems in philosophy to the extent that you're able to firmly conclude that the opposing position is stupid?

 

Very easily. Synths aren't alive, they're abominations of nature created by men playing god in a cancerous institution.

 

I'll allow it, as the only good synth is a dead synth. And also Nick.

 

To hell with you guys. I'm helping the Underground Railroad!

 

Alright, wait wait. Are you guys seriously taking the position that Star Wars robots are alive?

 

Are you a robot?

 

I'm just saying, prejudice against droids is a running theme in the films and I don't think that's because they're Roombas.

 

From a movie (derived from a book series) where robots were actually alive. Star Wars robots, by contrast, are not. They are Siri.

 

Pretty sure you can't torture Siri.

 

We'll see how you feel when it's revealed in TWoW that Margaery Tyrell has secretly been a programmed sexbot all along.

 

Why would you torture a droid? There behavior is alterable at the level of programming. Their memories are extractable electronically. Of all the idiocies that have appeared in the Star Wars films, this thankfully isn't one of them.

 

I guess you haven't seen RotJ.

 

It's what I like to call "Purina Toddler Chow."

 

I'm sort of curious as to what part of the film I'm forgetting, but in all honesty I have no response for this. I just. . .why?

 

"Nooo...nooo....AAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!"