Beyond The Age of Heroes (post-NJO AU: Anakin, Jaina, Jacen, L/M, H/L, Tahiri, Kyp,Jag) Sequel 2/2/07!

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by YodaKenobi, Nov 8, 2005.

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  1. LosDosMos Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 16, 2005
    star 3
    Great job, YK! =D= That was just :eek: =P~. I'd elaborate, but Thrawn McEwok has pretty much said it all :p

    I'm guessing that "home" is Naboo. That's where the Skywalkers/Solos went for vacation at the end of TLF, it fits with the whole Prequel-vibe, and it's certainly one of the most beautiful planets in the GFFA.
  2. Whitey Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 26, 2003
    star 6
    My computer was being worked on, I swear!

    And I don't think I can say anything that hasn't already been said. So, "Good Job!" :p

    Wait, I can... 8-} I like Vyler's "mustache twirler" qualities. Reminds me of Grievous.
  3. Jags_Scoundrel Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 12, 2003
    star 4
    DRL hasn't been kind lately and I've been trying hard to catch up - so I at least wanted to leave a quick note just to let you know how much I enjoyed the post. :D :D

    "We did it!" Jysella exclaimed, before awkwardly hugging his leg and then going quiet, the shame of her capture clearly taking hold again. He would have to speak with her about it all soon...

    :rolleyes: I see that Anakin received a heaping helping of Farmboy genes - he's totally clueless to her feelings, isn't he? I feel so bad for Jysella - unless she grows out of this crush really soon, I'm afraid that only bad things can come of this . . . :(

    Looking forward to more! :D
  4. Yodas-evil-twin Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2005
    star 5
    An excellent update.

    Vyler, Vyler, Vyler. How many times must the Alliance beat you to make you realise just how much of an idiot you are.

    And actually he's way too arrogant to be a Nte Gunray type of character. You think he would learn after all he's been through, but no! Here is what he should have done. First, he should have expanded the tunnel net work, and reinfroced the foundations as much as possible. Second, he shold've dug in artillary, set up repeating blaster positions so that they would have inter locking fields of fire. Third, he should've mined as many buildings as possible.

    And the battle droids. While granted they were handled well, I don't think they are very cost effective. If worse comes to worse, just use a grenade. Or an EMP. Plus, how much does it cost to make them?
  5. YodaKenobi VIP

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    Member Since:
    May 27, 2003
    star 6
    Pelranius: Well, I certainly like this new post. Makes you wonder what sort of state the rest of the galaxy is in, huh?

    Yeah, not great :p

    I'm reminded of the opening scene of Episode III... intentional?

    Yes, mostly, I guess. I had the basic idea before I saw Ep3 but the similarities were unescapable, so I just went with it.

    Was Vyler a typical local plastel pot dictator, or will we see him again?

    No plans to see him again, right now. He may have been worse than most, but nothing special ;)

    I'm suspicious about Callista's talk, though. Something doesn't quite ring right in her testimony.

    You could be right [face_whistling]

    The next post will involve Jaina, I take it?

    How'd you guess that? You're right though, Jaina's in the next one ;)

    Thanks for reading :)




    oldj: Great action, YK.

    Thanks, glad you enjoyed it :D

    I'll add my own "poor Jysella" to all the others. But she does seem to have the Horn toughness...

    Yep, with a mother and father like that, you know she would ;)

    Lovely and interesting writing, as usual.

    Thank you very much :)




    Thrawn: the fun has begun!!

    Yay [face_dancing]

    These aren't your (lead characters' grand)father's battledroids!!

    [face_laugh]

    (but am I right in thinking that "from Telti" is a deliberate Stoverism? Very nice!! )

    Nope. Telti was the planet in the New Rebellion, I think :p I looked it up in the planet's guide when I wrote this cause I couldn't remember the name. Just a detail, has nothing to do with Stover.

    Yippee!!
    I like the mixed visual "metaphor" here, the shift from TPM to RoTS...


    Yeah, good catch!

    He jumps the length from Naboo to Coruscant in a single bound!

    I wonder if there will be any jumps from Coruscant for him [face_whistling]

    *hums "Duel of the Fates* loudly and slightly off-key*

    hehe.

    That rocks!! Superb descriptions, immense fun to read...

    Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it.

    Perfect! Drol, dramatic, and with just a hint of mystery...

    One of my favorite things about Anakin's character? the mystery in his powers like the Corellian Trilogy.

    Superb. I don't think it's a criticism to say it's a homage to Matt's RotS novellization, both in style and in terms of its meaning... but at the same time, the voice is your own, and the cockiness of the homage perfectly captures Anakin and Wrev...

    It probably is to be criticized, but I was beginning to find my own writing boring (EotH at least) and wanted to do something with more personality.

    That's just... great!! I like that so much. It's imbalanced, and in Anakin's case, probably not even put it into words... but she cares for him, and he cares for her, and while it's as dangerous as a lightsaber, right now it's controlled, and enriching, for the characters, and the story...

    Yes, it's not something that's going to have a happy conclusion for either of them :p These sort of crushes never do though.

    Interesting take on Wrev - or is that a take on Jysella?

    Leave that for you to decide [face_whistling]

    Deviously planned!

    More of a last resort :p

    Battledroids!
    Human soldiers!
    Sullustans!?


    [face_laugh]

    I had to have some of them there working for him 8-}

    Flirt!

    Gah!

    I'm not sure if it's better or worse that his repartee with her is so innate and unconscious. But it looks (and reads) great!

    It's just Master/Padawan interaction. At least to Anakin it is ;)

    Fun. Wrong, but fun!

    There's no A/J 'shipping going on, I swear :p

    Heh. Nice, in so many ways.

    Thank you! :D

    Kinky!

    [face_laugh]

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

    I wasn't even suggesting that [face_laugh] :_| [face_laugh]

    I like how the silence of the explosion and the sounds of the aftermath contrast with the visual 'music' of light and
  6. Whitey Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 26, 2003
    star 6
    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

    I wasn't even suggesting that


    And now I know what he meant! [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh]
  7. YodaKenobi VIP

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    Member Since:
    May 27, 2003
    star 6
    Chapter 4: The Ship

    Denon Port Authority has a new guest of honor.

    Galactic Federation Intelligence has seen to it that this guest gets a proper reception.

    They've locked down an entire hanger reserved for evidence in criminal cases where ships are involved as an accommodation. They're barred the holojournalists who seek to get footage and ask snide questions, while providing dozens of agents to tend to their guest, assuring the best and most delicate care. They've put the area under a medical quarantine to assure the safety of all.

    The guest is on the tip of everyone's tongue. It is the thing that the planet's collective voice was inquiring about when it shouted over the sirens, "what's the ruckus?"

    Who is this diplomat from far, far away, whose presence has created such a stir that a crowd of thousands has gathered outside DPA's offices for a peek? Who the HoloNet has rumored Cal Omas will call an emergency meeting of his advisory council, and possibly even the entire senate, to discuss? Who is like nothing else the peoples in the galaxy's temporary capital have ever seen?

    It is a ship.

    Denon's newest star isn't even sentient? as far as anyone can tell. It is metal and circuits. Transparent viewports and ion drives. Its black surface somehow gleams without really being reflective.

    It is the biggest enigma seen since the coralskipper? and the circumstances surrounding its arrival don't make it any less intriguing.

    It is the ship Callista Ming piloted there in the early morning.

    It is this special guest that has brought another woman to the Port Authority offices on this day. She walks into the bustling hanger confidently, wearing a military-grade hazard suit more impermeable than most vac suits, with gloves that twist lock into the wrist and a transparent faceplate. She passes the swarm of GFI officers studying, holographing, and scanning the ship with virtually every device at the galaxy's disposal as casually as one might pass a cleaning droid on the streets of Eriadu.

    Aside from Callista, she is the only one on the planet who has ever seen a ship like this.

    Her name is Jaina.

    And on the day the end begins, she is almost as oblivious to the truth of the impending danger as the others. What separates her is a more appropriate amount of dread. A measure of fear that goes slightly closer to the truth than most, for she knows a little more.

    On the surface, Jaina Solo is an unimposing young woman of modest height and a slender frame. She is beautiful? the daughter of Leia Organa Solo can't help but be. But not strikingly so? because she chooses not to be.

    In reality, Jaina Solo is chiseled out of duracrete. Eyes lock on her as she enters the hanger, not because she is supple and pretty, or affluent, but because of the power she exudes. It is in her every movement the way the faint whirring of servomotors whispers when the droids around her stir.

    Beneath the fair skin and long brunette locks is a spirit stronger than any other's.

    Hardened by war.

    Strengthened with the Force.

    She is the Sword of the Jedi.

    Send someone else when you need a negotiator. Jaina Solo is dispatched to drop the hammer. And when she does, one can be assured that the stroke will fall hardest.

    She is strong because the galaxy requires it. Hard, because she's been made to be. The Yuuzhan Vong long ago made her this way, the war's indirect shaping. Her brothers' captures and the death of Chewbacca, and so many others, have transformed her in the same way that Mezhan Kwaad had altered Tahiri.

    She is always alone, even when in the company of others? solitary in every way that matters. Her family members are the only ones who truly understand her. Relationships with others, like Jagged Fel, never seem to last very long.

    Such is the life of the Jedi's Sword.

    Her uncle told her that her life would be this way when he bestowed that mantel upon her four years ago. It is her duty to protect so others will find the peace she will never know.

    Sh
  8. Thrawn McEwok Co-Author: Essential Guide to Warfare

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    Member Since:
    May 9, 2000
    star 6
    [ :D Steals first reply!! [face_dancing]]

    - The Imperial Ewok
  9. Yodas-evil-twin Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2005
    star 5
    Great as always.

    And as for the strategy, yes its intended for a ground battle. Most of the strategy I mentioned was by the Japanese in the later phases of the Pacific War (I am a partial WWII buff.)
  10. Jek_Windu Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 26, 2003
    star 4
    Great, great post. And I like how you write Jaina's character- you do the Sword of the Jedi plotline much more poignantly than in the books. Can't wait for more.
  11. RebelMom Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 20, 2000
    star 6
    I remember the Vaagari from Survivors Quest. Not pleasant creatures. You keep throwing in all these hints about "the end"...That's not encouraging either. I'm ready for something happy... surely just a small paragraph of happiness? ;)
  12. WynssaStarflare Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 17, 2004
    star 4
    Great job! I love how you really got into how Jaina felt about the situation. Is Jag gonna show up anytime soon? :) Can't wait for more!
  13. princess_melissa Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 7, 2005
    star 4
    Oh boy, now I have three posts to catch up on *goes back to read*
  14. MirandaFair Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 13, 2005
    star 4
    Goodness! I have fallen behind.

    Chapter 3: Mara's interrogation of Callista had me giddy. Yes, you read it right. Giddy. Anytime Mara gets to cut that body snatcher down a notch is welcome. ;) Luke's thoughts about Mara was nicely done. It was good to see him acknowledge his past and be happy where he was in the future.

    Chapter 4: This pairing of Anakin and Jysella is a nice change! I hope her feelings will be reciprocated...because it would add plenty of tension where Tahiri would be involved. I like it - a lot. The description about Jysella's 14-year-old awkwardness was cute and relatable. Another amazing chapter. My heart rates up from all the adventures! [face_batting]

    Chapter 5: The images you create make my jaw drop. :eek:

    In reality, Jaina Solo is chiseled out of duracrete. Eyes lock on her as she enters the hanger, not because she is supple and pretty, or affluent, but because of the power she exudes. It is in her every movement the way the faint whirring of servomotors whispers when the droids around her stir.

    Your description about Jaina and her part in everything is nicely done. The profics could take a lesson from that since I was lost during the NJO. [face_blush]

    There were some things even the Sword of the Jedi couldn't stop? an angry Mara Jade was one of them she didn't even want to try.

    [face_laugh] Yes, choose your battles wisely, dear Jaina. Let your aunt have her moment to fume.

    The conflict between Luke and Mara was apparent. Callista's presence seems to have put a small rift between the two. Hopefully Luke will get smart and stand by his wife's side.

    =D=, as always.
  15. SilSolo Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2004
    star 5
    Up I'll return&reply!
  16. Jags_Scoundrel Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 12, 2003
    star 4
    Sorry to hear about Darth, hope you get some time to relax

    From the land of Be Careful What You Wish For 'Cause You Just Might Get It... I relaxed all day yesterday - with the stomach bug that my son had last week that got me behind in the first place. [face_sick] But thanks for the thought, anyway! :)


    I'll add my kudos to the way you've portrayed Jaina in this post - just perfect! =D=

    There were some things even the Sword of the Jedi couldn't stop? an angry Mara Jade was one of them she didn't even want to try.

    [face_laugh] Smart one, that Jaina.

    She didn't know if the prospect of contacting him again excited or terrified her.

    My guess is both. I've always thought that her feelings for Jag scare the hell out of her and that's why she keeps pushing him away.

    Great post, as always! :D
  17. poku_29 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 19, 2005
    star 1
    Good, good. This is getting interesting. very much so. yes. So advanced technology that our friends cant even get it open. Cant mean good for the future. I trust Anakin however, he cracks it I know. Why is everything so dark now? You are making it sound something even more dangerous than the YV and again you have managed to create a really capturing athmosphere. Im am bit afraid here [face_worried]

    PS. Im running out of patience YodaK :mad: , where is Tahi? Want to read about her soooon,,,, Want to read about her and A together. [face_batting]
  18. Spike2002 Former FF-UK RSA and Arena Manager

    Member Since:
    Feb 4, 2002
    star 6
    Nice update YK. Good that you referenced Empire of the Hand, and Jaina is annoyingly bitchy as ever, so excellent characterisation there ;)

    And I detected a slight hint of jealousy from Mara when Luke mentioned going to talk to Callista. Wonder what that would lead to? :p
  19. FORCEBlLADE Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2003
    star 3
    Excellent writng on Jaina. She has that dark and scarred tone that's the definite result of everything she's been through in the war. Kind of like her garnddad, Anakin.
  20. Magnuskn Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 14, 2002
    star 4
    Again, one excellent chapter.

    I hope we´ll see Anakin and Tahiri together soon, though. :p I´d like some fluff, even if it goes a bit against the tone you are setting. I´m guessing we´ll all need it by the time the s*** hits the fan....

    Magnus
  21. _Jedi_of_Destiny_ Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 17, 2003
    star 4
    Jaina Solo's part in the End, begins here, with the ship. Like most the beings in the galaxy, her life will forever be divided into two parts? before Callista Ming's arrival on Denon, and after.

    Her life will be forever changed.

    She's at the turning point and she has no idea.


    Essence Point? [face_mischief]

    After doing that to her mother, Jaina wouldn?t mind a few minutes alone with Callista while the holocams were switched off...

    [face_devil] Evil Jaina.... [face_shame_on_you] [face_shame_on_you] And she calls herself a Jedi. :p

    She didn't know if the prospect of contacting him again excited or terrified her.

    I can't wait for that scene. :cool:

    And it was already too late to do anything about it.

    Whoah. You've been working hard these last few chapters to really instill a sense of looming disaster. [face_worried] If it's already too late then I guess our heroes will have to work harder to keep the peace this time around. Nothing they can't handle, right? [face_worried]

    Looking forward to more. :D
  22. TKeira_Lea Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 10, 2002
    star 5
    Yobi, DRL has been a bit hectic, but I want to say I have read the last two chapters. They were fabulous. I loved Jysella's rescue and Jaina as the Sword was spot on.
  23. oldjedinurse Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 6, 2003
    star 4
    YK, I think Chapter Four: The Ship is another example of your beautiful way with words.

    It is the thing that the planet's collective voice was inquiring about when it shouted over the sirens, "what's the ruckus?"

    :cool:

    Chocolate eyes settle on the curves of black metal again, flowing as effortlessly as it had into the system. The alien ship looked so powerful, a serene tapestry of inanimate parts that made Jaina feel almost silly for how much fear it instilled in her. But written within the golden circuits and wiring fused into the blackened hull plating, was their doom.

    =D=

    Of course, its a really good story, too. I love your writing. :D

    oldj
  24. YodaKenobi VIP

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    Member Since:
    May 27, 2003
    star 6
    Thrawn: [ Steals first reply!! ]

    Way to go! [face_dancing]


    evil-twin: Great as always.

    Thank you.

    And as for the strategy, yes its intended for a ground battle. Most of the strategy I mentioned was by the Japanese in the later phases of the Pacific War (I am a partial WWII buff.)

    I see [face_thinking]




    Jek: Great, great post.

    Thank you :)

    And I like how you write Jaina's character- you do the Sword of the Jedi plotline much more poignantly than in the books. Can't wait for more.

    Thanks again. I really like that line for Jaina's character. Will have more up next week.




    RM: I remember the Vaagari from Survivors Quest. Not pleasant creatures.

    Yeah, not pleasant, but not all that scary when you got down to it. Luke and Mara owned them :cool:

    You keep throwing in all these hints about "the end"...That's not encouraging either. I'm ready for something happy... surely just a small paragraph of happiness?

    I promise there will be at least one happy scene somewhere :p

    Thanks for reading! :D



    Wyn: Great job! I love how you really got into how Jaina felt about the situation.

    Thanks so much :)

    Is Jag gonna show up anytime soon?

    It will be a few chapters, but Jag is definitely in the fic, and we'll get his POV in scenes.

    Can't wait for more!

    More will be up soon.




    melissa: Oh boy, now I have three posts to catch up on *goes back to read*

    No rush ;)



    MirandaFair: Goodness! I have fallen behind.

    Probably my fault :p I think you asked me to PM you and I am horrible at remembering that.

    Chapter 3: Mara's interrogation of Callista had me giddy. Yes, you read it right. Giddy. Anytime Mara gets to cut that body snatcher down a notch is welcome.

    Hehe, I'm glad you liked it.

    Luke's thoughts about Mara was nicely done. It was good to see him acknowledge his past and be happy where he was in the future.

    Yeah, I'd say things have ended up pretty good for Luke.

    Chapter 4: This pairing of Anakin and Jysella is a nice change! I hope her feelings will be reciprocated...because it would add plenty of tension where Tahiri would be involved. I like it - a lot. The description about Jysella's 14-year-old awkwardness was cute and relatable.

    I don't know if you caught this, but Anakin is 22. Her feelings will certainly not be reciprocated :p I'm pretty sure that wouldn't even be allowed on the boards. It will, however, be a source of some tension in the story.

    Another amazing chapter. My heart rates up from all the adventures!

    Thanks!

    Chapter 5: The images you create make my jaw drop.

    *picks your jaw up* 8-}

    Your description about Jaina and her part in everything is nicely done. The profics could take a lesson from that since I was lost during the NJO.

    Thanks. I didn't like the direction the NJO took either, which is why I started writing.

    Yes, choose your battles wisely, dear Jaina. Let your aunt have her moment to fume.

    *nods in agreement*

    The conflict between Luke and Mara was apparent. Callista's presence seems to have put a small rift between the two. Hopefully Luke will get smart and stand by his wife's side.

    I'm sure he will [face_whistling]

    , as always.

    Thanks again :)




    Sil: Up I'll return&reply!

    Thank you.



    Scoundrel: Happy Birthday, btw ;)

    From the land of Be Careful What You Wish For 'Cause You Just Might Get It... I relaxed all day yesterday - with the stomach bug that my son had last week that got me behind in the first place. But thanks for the thought, anyway!

    Yeah, I saw your post in the cantina. Sorry to hear it [:D]

    I'll add my kudos to the way you've portrayed Jaina in this post - just perfect!

    Thank you.

    Smart one, th
  25. TKeira_Lea Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 10, 2002
    star 5
    No you're the best [:D]

    :poke: :poke:
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