Saga The Angel of Alderaan-ANH AU(A/A,H/L,L/M)-COMPLETED!- 22.May 2005: Some re-written for Ep. III

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Tribun, Apr 4, 2004.

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  1. Tribun Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 20, 2003
    star 3
    I got that idea some time ago, an no one ever had it before as far as I know.
    The story begins on the Death Star's overbridge, exactly after Leia had told Tarkin that the Rebel base would be on Dantooine, which was a lie.

    Please give me feedback!

    Title: The Angel of Alderaan
    Author(s): Tribun
    Timeframe: starting in ANH
    Characters: The whole Skywalker family, Mara, Obi-Wan, Palpatine and many, many more.
    Genre: AU
    Keywords: V/P, L/M, H/L
    Summary: While waiting for the Death Star to fire on Alderaan, Vader sensed a presence on the planet, he hadn' felt in 19 years. Preventing Alderaan from being destroyed, a new chapter in the history of the Skywalker family begins.
    Notes:

    (Chapter edited for corrections)
    Chapter I

    Tarkin was a fool. Even under the threat of her home world being destroyed, the princess would never reveal the location of the Rebel base. Vader had sensed the lie as soon as it was out of her mouth. The walls around her mind were strong, but he still sensed every lie from her. And Tarkin believed it at once, thinking that his doomsday machine would press the princess into confession. But Vader wouldn't say anything. He would merely wait for Tarkin to embarrass himself.

    Tarkin turned to Chief Bast, who was in command of the fire control station. "Continue with the operation! You may fire when ready!"

    [image=http://massassi.yavin4.com/sw_img/e4star4.jpg]

    The look of shock on the princess' face also showed the terror she felt at these words "WHAT?!"

    That hadn't come to Vader as a surprise either. Tarkin was too eager to destroy Alderaan to let this opportunity slip through his fingers. It was only another demonstration of Tarkin's foolishness. Destroying Alderaan would only ignite more rebellion. But Vader couldn't have cared less.

    Let Tarkin dig his own grave.... His inner voice told him.

    Holding the princess he prepared for the worst. Alderaan had a population of at least 7 billion people, all humans. Their deaths would cause disruptions in the Force that were unhealthy for every Force-user, except for the Sith.

    A Sith draws power from death and suffering. Palpatine had contacted him after the destruction of Despayre, which was a test for the main weapon. The laughs of delight from this old man over all these deaths were real. His mastery of the dark side had given Palpatine much control, and the destruction of Despayre had made him even stronger.

    But for Vader, it was a totally different matter. The destruction of Despayre had left him weak for hours. While a Sith apprentice himself, he was never able to hate with his full heart like Palpatine could, if that old man even had a heart. It was a truth that he had hidden well from Palpatine, and himself. So much death at once would make a healthy force user only dizzy for minutes, but his body was on life-support. For him, the consequences were much more serious.

    Despayre only had several millions inhabitants, all prisoners. But the death of seven billion people would kill him instantly at so close range. He had to prepare himself by totally enclosing himself in the Force; it was the only thing that would prevent him from being crushed by so much suffering.

    While he did so, his thoughts began to wander towards better memories of his life, before his turning, before his life became lonely and cold, and before he became crippled. He thought back to when he was a good looking man, when many loved and liked him. He remembered when he was still with his angel.

    Seeing how much the princess looked like Padmé had awakened memories in him, that he had thought lost long time ago. When Palpatine had told him that he had accidently killed her on Mustafar right after being put into the cursed suit, his heart had crumled to pieces. His angel, his child, gone. And it had been his fault. And the guilt was always there, threatening to crush him, forcing him to push it away into the darkest corner of his mind. The bitterness of that fact had made Vader more brutal and cold than before, and he had truly be
    Master Esso Antos likes this.
  2. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    Evil CLIFFIE! Okay, put us out of our misery and put up another post. PLEASE?? Great start.
  3. The_Good_Twin Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 6, 2003
    star 2
    :eek: You can't just stop there and leave us hanging like that! :eek: ;P

    Great first post! :)

    :D :D :D
  4. Jedi_Jessie_Anne Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 4, 2004
    star 3
    Hey! A cliffie?! No fair...please continue.
  5. Jedi_Liz Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 24, 2000
    star 6
    wow, that was a great start!
  6. Solo_Fan Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 3, 2003
    star 4
    I love the prospect of a story where Alderaan has not been destroyed by the Death Star. It makes for such interesting possibilities. Looking forward to reading more. :)
  7. Tribun Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 20, 2003
    star 3
    Thanks for the Feedback, I can't get enough of these.
    Here we go:

    (edited for corrections)
    Chapter II

    "Orders canceled! I repeat: Orders canceled! Stop primary ignition at once!" Bast wasted no time and barked orders in panic into the comstation that connected him to the fire control of the main weapon. It would be his head that would roll if Alderaan were to be destroyed despite Vader's orders. The seconds lasted like hours, before the reply came.

    "Primary ignition canceled! The stored power will be slowly drained into the other systems!" came from fire control. Bast relaxed. Vader's orders would not be violated. But Tarkin was a different matter. He was red-faced with anger, anger directed towards the masked Sith Lord.

    "Lord Vader! What is the meaning of this!? I'm in command of this operation! You have no power to overrule me! I....." Tarkin gasped, when suddenly his voice quieted. He could still breathe, but couldn't say a word. Vader was clearly annoyed at Tarkin?s display of anger.

    [image=http://wso.williams.edu/~rfoxwell/starwars/pics/Choke.gif]

    "You are foolish to believe that you could overrule me, Tarkin. I will use my command power as the executor of the Emperor's will, and I am now in charge of any matters concerning Alderaan and the princess here!" While Vader said this, Leia remained silent; the whole situation was too surreal for her. Vader continued, "To destroy Alderaan would be extremely foolish! They would be then martyrs for the rebellion, and the effect would be zero! No, a different approach is better!"

    Vader turned to the station for communications "Order the Alderaanian government to lower the shield and surrender at once! Threaten them that if they won't cooperate, we will shatter the shield with a low-powered shot! And then, we will be much less gentle!"

    "Yes, Lord Vader!"

    Vader then turned to General Tagge, who had remained silent "General! Prepare an adequate landing force at once! Alderaan is to be brought under full imperial control in less than an hour!" The Death Star was far more than a machine of mass destruction. Equipped with many more troops than they would need onboard and countless machines of war, they were a flying base. It was easy to send this force, when the entire crew of the Death Star was many times greater than the whole population of Alderaan.

    Tagge nodded "Yes Lord Vader. Our forces will be ready for the landing at once!" Then he left the bridge to co-ordinate the landing of the troops.

    "Lord Vader, the shield is lowered! Viceroy Organa himself promised, that there will be no resistance!" the man at the comm reported.

    "Very good. The viceroy is to be arrested for high treason! The shield alone is witness of the hypocrisy of the Alderaanian government. They say that they have no weapons, but the shield and defensive systems say something else! The viceroy and the government will be judged on Coruscant and an example will be made of them. We shall show them how traitors are dealt with!"

    Vader had noticed that the princess paled slightly at these words. He then continued, "Inform me as soon as Alderaan is under full imperial control!"

    Vader called two guards. "Take the princess back to her cell! And don't even dare to try anything!" Then he left the room, and only then did Tarkin found his voice and cursed in anger. This Sith Lord had ruined the perfect opportunity to demonstrate his weapon of destruction!

    "That....I will remember!" Tarkin whispered in anger.

    ...on the way to cell block AA-23...

    Leia was deep in thoughts while she was escorted back to her cell. Why had Vader prevented Alderaan from being destroyed? He was twisted and evil, cold-hearted. But the fact was there; her homeworld had a second chance, even if it was under imperial control.

    There was still also the fact that her father would get the death sentence. Nothing other that execution was possible because the evidence on Alderaan was too serious. The evidence could not be hidden in such a short time. But even his death was
  8. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    Oh please type fast! I can't wait for Vader to confront Padme. If anyone can make the man think sensibly it's her. Great post!
  9. Tribun Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 20, 2003
    star 3
    I'm good, a second chapter today...

    Chapter III

    Thousands of landing-barques, troop transports and shuttles descended onto the blue world known as Alderaan. As soon as they landed, they unloaded thier cargo. Walkers of all sizes, tanks and armored vehicles on wheels and tracked proplusion. Artellery and APC's, and wheels and hoving with repusorlifts. And countless stormtroopers in thier characteristic white armour.

    Modular command centres were set on the ground to at once be used to co-ordinate troops and secure thier regions. While TIE's and Gunboats patrolled the skies of Alderaan. Then the troops advanced. The artellery taking position outside the cities for tactical reasons, while soldiers and armoured vehicles entered the urbanized areas. They met no resistance.

    [image=http://wso.williams.edu/~rfoxwell/starwars/art/AlderaArt.jpg]

    From the big window of her suite, Padmè Amidala Skywalker had a good view when the imperial troops together with thier walkers of all sizes bagan to size control of the capitol of Alderaan. No shots were heared, no cries of panic. Alderaan had totally capitulated and won't resist, because of the moon sized monstrosity than hung in the sky, circling around the planet.

    Amidala had seen that once before, and it brought back hurtful memories. 31 years before, she was Queen of Naboo, and was witness of exactly the same scene. The Trade Federation had invaded her hme planet, and no one dared to fight back. Exactly as like 31 years before she stood at a window to watch as a free world was brought under hard control.

    Nothing has changed..... All these years ago, it were the Trade Federation, now it is the Empire. It is, as if history repeats itself..... This harsh truth hurt her big time, but there wasn't anything she could have changed now. She had bacome a totally powerless woman. And she had lost everything. Her power, her husband...her children...and her own life, declared dead 19 years ago.

    Thinking of her children was enough to let the always waiting tears re-appear. She had never known her son. Luke was taken away from her shortly after birth, to live on Tatooine. It had nearly broken her heart to say goodbye, to most likely never see him again. And if she remembered well, he would be a man now, turned 18 two weeks ago.

    And there was Leia. The first five years, she was able to raise her at the court of Alderaan, before the desaster happend. After four years, Bail's loving wife had died because of illness, and he had married again. But the second wife of Bail was extremly jaleous of her and her daughter, because she was unable to have children by herself. With threats of divorce she had blackmailed Bail to unspeakable decisions. Padmè had to leave Leia, who was adopted illegally into the family Organa. Bail's new wife got 'her' child, and since then she had never seen her again.

    The only reason why she had not had ended it was Bail, who ramained loyal to her, trying to give her as much information about Leia's life as he could. Leia had never accepted Bail's wife as mother, remembering Padmè too well.

    But all this would end now. Bail would be arrested together with government and court, and Leia was missed in action, most likely captured and prisoner of the Empire.

    "Oh Ani, why did it had to be that way? Why have you trusted that tyrant, who now is your master? We could have been such a good family..." The last time she had seen him, he had become blind with power, had even choked her with the Force on Mustafar. The horrible memory had never faded away. With tears in her eyes she watched as the troops proceed to capture all key positions.

    ...Lord Vader's meditation chamber...

    I look like death himself......

    Vader had removed has mask and helmet inside of his chamber to stare at his deformed reflection in the mirror. The scars from Obi-Wans lightsaber were still on his head, the skin pale from years without sunlight. His hair was shaved, because it would be unconforbale to let it grow when wearing a helmet. To make it sho
  10. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    The Millenium Falcon was still hours away from Alderaan, but Obi-Wan got a strange feeling, that something was not as it was supposed to be. It was as if something should have happened, but it hadn't. The ways of the force were mysterious, and even Yoda hadn't mastered them to perfection. It was as if the future had begun to shift......

    Wow! Great way to end the post. I am looking forward to seeing where this goes.

  11. Tribun Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 20, 2003
    star 3
    I know this looks selfish, but bfore it vanishes on page 2...

    Up!

    Oh, and Chapter IV will come tomorrow...
  12. starsailor721 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 31, 2004
    star 1
    Wow! I just started reading this story and I really like it. What a creative take on the whole sega. :)
  13. Jedi_Liz Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 24, 2000
    star 6
    I like the creative turn of events!
  14. LukeAnaSkywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 2, 2003
    star 1
    Oh, wow! This is good. Keep up the great work.
  15. Solo_Fan Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 3, 2003
    star 4
    Sounds like there may be a future impromptu family reunion on the Executor between Padme, Vader, and Leia. Things are definitely going to be a little different than Obi-wan expected.

    Grammar note: If you have access to a spellchecker or a beta reader, use them. The story is good, but it needs a little polishing.
  16. Tribun Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 20, 2003
    star 3
    Solo_fan>Sounds like there may be a future impromptu family reunion on the Executor between Padme, Vader, and Leia. Things are definitely going to be a little different than Obi-wan expected.

    Well, you will have to wait a while before the Executor appears. We are still on the Death Star, and the Executor was finished ~6 months after ANH.

    Grammar note: If you have access to a spellchecker or a beta reader, use them. The story is good, but it needs a little polishing.

    I have no spell checker, and I'm also no native English speaker. You see my problem.
    -------------------------------------------

    The story continues, and the first meeting between Padmè and Vader is a bit different than you think.... :D

    (edited for corrections)
    Chapter IV

    "I must protest! I'm the head of state! I enjoy diplomatic immunity!" Bail cursed while Stormtroopers brought him in binders out of a shuttle in one of the hangars of the Death Star. From there he would be shipped directly to Coruscant, into the central prison for the VIP-prisoners. All the other prisoners were already shipped off in minutes after their arrest, he was the last one.

    "Traitors don't enjoy diplomatic immunity!" Bail Organa was suddenly face-to-mask with Darth Vader, his mechanically enhanced voice booming. "The evidence we already have is more than enough to prove it! The hypocrisy of a weapon-free Alderaan has been brought to the light of the day! Alderaan will now be strictly controlled by the Empire!"

    If Bail was somehow intimidated by Vader, he did not show it. "Darth Vader...... I should have known that this is your doing. Nobody else would have dared to invade our world." Bail only felt anger at this man, who had hurt his friend so much. That his actions had caused Amidala to nearly die because of a broken heart, he would never forgive him.

    "You should be thankful, viceroy!" Vader's tone was cold and hard. "Without me, Tarkin would have reduced your planet to a rubble field! But I can't expect that from you, a traitor with the rebel alliance!" Vader turned to the guards "Take him away! I never want to see him in my line of sight again!" Under new protests, Bail Organa was brought into in a Stormtrooper transport that immediately departed after the hatch closed.

    One traitor less..... It is disgusting what treason people are able to commit. If I were the Emperor, I would know how to prevent such rebellious thoughts from even existing! Palpatine might be a strategical genius, but he has no idea how to rule a state! Vader thought. Yes, his plans for the future of the Empire after Palpatine were great and simple at the same time. The rebellion was a result of Palpatine's political moves that had made the Empire some enemies. He would have to correct this when the Emperor would be finally dead. But he had to be patient, Palpatine was well over 80, and still showed no signs of dying. But even the dark side couldn't make a man immortal. His time would come sooner or later.

    Quickly he sat behind the controls of the readied shuttle. Flying it himself was a security measure to prevent the wrong eyes from seeing Padmè when he would return with her. How would she react to him? In these fateful days, he had been blinded by anger and power. Now that he had learned patience in these long years, he saw why she had reacted as she did. And why he felt guilty over how he had treated her.

    There was no way to predict her reaction. Still it nagged at his thoughts while the shuttle descended towards the capitol of Alderaan. He clearly felt where she was, so it was easy to land the shuttle near the building behind a row of trees.

    Punching in the lock codes, he made his way towards the back entrance.

    ...upstairs...

    Amidala had already booked the next commercial flight leaving Alderaan. It was surprising, that business already went on as if nothing had happened. She had few belongings to pack so it did not take her long. The last task she had to do was to erase all data files that would point to her presence
  17. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    Very nice post! I can't wait to see what Vader and Padme have to talk about. I look forward to updates on this one very much! Keep going...
  18. Tribun Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 20, 2003
    star 3
    By the way.

    What do you think about my writing Bail's wife as a total royal bitch? I mean, to blackmail Bail with divorce to let Leia taken away from Padmè and ban Amidala from the palace to never see her child again?

    That woman must have a heart of ice, right? I thought of it as a good explanation why Leia and Padmè went seperated ways.

    So what do you think about that?
  19. Jedi_Liz Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 24, 2000
    star 6
    I thought the Bail's wife thing was an interesting twist and good explanation.
  20. Laura_Anu Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 27, 2002
    star 4
    This is very good! I like the way Vader stopped Tarkin from destroying Alderaan. Keep up the good work!
  21. Tribun Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 20, 2003
    star 3
    Upping it a bit.

    Also, VaderLVR64 is now my beta reader.
  22. Dally Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 2, 2001
    star 4
    A very good story! I like it a lot. I thought that the detail of Bail's wife being a witch was quite believable.
  23. Solo_Fan Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 3, 2003
    star 4
    Glad to hear you found a beta reader. For one whose native language is not english, you write it pretty well. This is one of the few stories I have read where Bail's wife is portrayed as a bitch. That's a new one for me. Looking forward to reading more!
  24. Jeditheskyisblue Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 17, 2001
    star 4
    Just that one little Twist of Amdaila being alive saved a planet full of people.

    I'm hooked and can't wait for Luke and Obi-wan to show up on the scene.

  25. Marsa Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 23, 2004
    star 2

    Ooh, this is great!

    *Adds to Active Topic Notification*


    UP!! ~Marsa
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