Discussion in 'Community' started by Adam of Nuchtern, Jan 2, 2013.
You're not wrong, Walter, you're just an ***hole.
One does a mitzvah and this is the thanks one gets?
He's draining his sebaceous cyst!
So, I'm tendin' bar there at Ecklund and Swedlin's last Tuesday, and this little guy's drinkin' and he says, "So where can a guy find some action? I'm goin' crazy out there at the lake." And I says, "What kinda action?" and he says, "Woman action, what do I look like?" And I says, "Well, what do I look like? I don't arrange that kinda thing," and he says, "But I'm goin' crazy out there at the lake," and I says, "Well, this ain't that kinda place."
I'll show you the life of the mind!
"so why don't you make like a tree, and get outta here!!!!!!!"
Well ain't this place a geographical oddity!
I don't want Fop. I'm a Dapper Dan man.
Jackie Treehorn treats objects like women.
"No, not that motherscratcher, Bill Parker!"
Pete, the personal rancor reflected in that remark I don't intend to dignify with comment. But I would like to address your general attitude of hopeless negativism. Consider the lilies of the goddamn field.
This country's hard on people, you can't stop what's coming, it ain't all waiting on you. That's vanity.
I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species and I realized that you're not actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment but you humans do not. You move to an area and you multiply and multiply until every natural resource is consumed and the only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is? A virus. Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You're a plague and we are the cure.
I think...you're confused about who you're supposed to be quoting here, unless of course you're just ****** around.
Coen (former)Brothers right? The one had the sex change operation and became a sister.
The Wachowski's, smart ass.
I used to think you were a swell guy. Well, to be honest, I thought you were an imbecile. But then I figured out you WERE a swell guy... A little slow, maybe, but a swell guy. Well, maybe you're not so slow, But you're not so swell either. And it looks like you're an imbecile after all!"
Son, you got a panty on your head.
You punch in at 8:30 every morning, except you punch in at 7:30 following a business holiday, unless it's a Monday, then you punch in at 8 o'clock. Punch in late and they dock you. Incoming articles get a voucher, outgoing articles provide a voucher. Move any article without a voucher and they dock you. Letter size a green voucher, oversize a yellow voucher, parcel size a maroon voucher. Wrong color voucher and they dock you! 6787049A/6. That is your employee number. It will not be repeated! Without your employee number you cannot get your paycheck. Inter-office mail is code 37, intra-office mail 37-3, outside mail is 3-37. Code it wrong and they dock you! This has been your orientation. Is there anything you do not understand, is there anything you understand only partially? If you have not been fully oriented, you must file a complaint with personnel. File a faulty complaint and they dock you!
Shake a leg, Junior! Thank god your mammy died givin' birth...If she'd a seen ya she'd a died of shame.
Lots of respectable people have been hit by trains.
Young Beauford there's the sly one...already knows his ABC's! Watch this...Hit the deck, boy!
There's more to life than a little money, you know. Don'tcha know that? And here ya are, and it's a beautiful day. Well. I just don't understand it.