Saga The Chosen One Rises - Alternate ROTS novel (based off the Stover novel) *Completed*

Interesting idea, I'm enjoying seeing this play out. I think it's very in character for Anakin, as well, in that he still needs help to do this -- in this case, Qui-Gon's. There were so many places for him to step up to the plate and start to do a better job with all this. Your writing style is really improving, too.

Anyone who enjoys seeing Palpy not get his own way, I've got another one for you ... http://boards.theforce.net/message.asp?topic=20107556&start=20238513

 

And even the R2 unit could fight

That comment had me laughing. I liked the banter between Obi-wan and Anakin it showed that they have a close friendship to be able to tease each other. Of course I don't think Palpatine is liking the way his day is going so far. Anakin isn't taken his bait to fall to the dark side and now he's been left to die with the two Jedi aboard a fallen apart ship. No not a good day to be Palpatine.

 

This is a good story. I can't wait to see what happens next. I am glad that Anakin was able to listen to Qui-Gon.

leiaremer

 

You do miracles with the fighting scenes! You describe them really well... I wish I could do that...

Nice Obi/Anakin interaction!

I'm really curious about how Anakin's new position will affect Padmé and Luke and Leia.
Anakin, do you think Obi-Wan might be able to help us?- Padmé

 

(firstly, I saw a few grammitcal errors in the last post which I had not seen before I posted, so edited those out now, sorry about missing them)

Thanks, Souderwan, Jeditheskyisblue and Jadie, glad you liked the Anakin/Obi banter I put in there, I enjoyed writting it and glad everyone has liked it so far.

Glad you liked the Black Knightesc scene with the MangaGuards, though credit for that largely goes to Stover, it was adapted from what he wrote.

And thankyou Commander31K, for saying my story captures the spirit of the novel, that means a lot!

Thank for the your compliements over the strengthen for my style and that you like the sotry LLL!

Glad you the like R2 bit, though again that was adapted from Stover, but I though it was funny, so I had to include it somewhere.

And glad you liked the action scene Jadie!!

Thanks for reading everyone!!!

 

(Hey everyone, next part of the story. Hope you all enjoy it)

------------------------It?s the Landing that?s going to be Tricky----------------

On the bridge, a blast shield had closed over the destroyed transpisteel window, and the atmosphere had managed to stabilise.

However, the buckling on the bridge had become continuous. White-hot sparks drifted past outside the view wall?s windows. According to three different alarms blaring on the bridge all at once, these sparks were what was left of the ablative shielding on the nose of the cruiser.

Anakin starred grimly at a console readout. Things still weren?t getting any better, he thought.

?All the escape pods are gone.? Looking up at Obi-Wan, he stated, ?were trapped.?

Obi-Wan looked more interested then concerned. ?Well, this is a chance for you to display your legendary piloting skills, my young friend. You can fly this cruiser, can?t you??

Smiling at the friendly ribbing, Anakin said ?flying no problem. It?s the landing that going to be tricky.? Giving a shaking laugh, Anakin added, ?particularly as it?s not something this cruiser was designed to do. And to do so in one piece??

?So??, Obi-Wan said unimpressed.

?So?, Anakin said, unsnapped the crash-webbing and removing the Neimoidian?s pilot?s body, ?you?d better belt up, this ride going to get rough.?

Anakin got into the chair and started to examine the unfamiliar alien controls. The ship suddenly jerked, and it altitude began skew even more, with yet another klaxon starting to scream to emphasis this new addition to the Hand?s litany of fatal problems.

Anakin?s hands sprung back, ?That wasn?t me! I haven?t even done anything yet!!?

?You certainly haven?t,? Palpatine commented, appearing unnaturally calm. ?It seems someone is shooting at us.?

?Magnificent,? Anakin muttered, ?could this day get any better.?

?Perhaps we could contact them,? Obi-Wan suggested, moving to the surviving comm station. ?Let them know we?ve taken the ship.?

?Good idea. You can take comm,? Anakin said. ?Artoo, take second chair. Chancellor,? he pointed to the co-pilot?s seat, ?please strap yourself in.? He grimaced as he saw scraps of the hull, burning, flying by the bridge. ?Were about to go in hot, in more ways then one.?

 

---------------------------------------Battle?s End-----------------------------------

The vast space battle that had torn and battered Coruscant throughout the long day finally began to end. The bright shimmering canopy of plasma flashes and the ion trails of missiles and proton torpedoes began to fade into the blurred lines of ships jumping to hyperspace as the Seperatist strike force fled in full retreat. The light from Corsucant?s star was splintered through the iridescent clouds of gas and debris from destroyed starfighters and their occupants. Broken cruisers limped towards the repair shipyards and ports, moving through shattered hulks of what had been once be cruisers, but now were nothing more than massive wrecks of burnt-out scrap metal drifting in interplanetary space. Prize crews captured surrendered ships, arresting the live crew and fixing restraining bolts to the droids.

The dayside surface of Coruscant was cloaked in the dark smoke from a million fires from burning meteorites of ship fragments. The artificial lights from the nightside were dimmed by the red-white fires from the numerous craters of burning steel of fallen ships; each impact was a caldera of unimaginable death. The important ships in the Coruscant skies were no longer warships but fire-suppression and rescue craft.

And in the midst of all this, attention was focused on one ship currently burning its way through Coruscant?s atmosphere. It had once been the Seperatist flagship the Invisible Hand, before it had lost much of itself, included the whole aft section which had broken off from the ship, which remained to plunge through the atmosphere, leaving a burning trail in its wake.

The reason the ship was the focus of such attention was due to a garbled signal that been sent from the ship by Jedi Knights Kenobi and Skywalker informing the Republic forces that they had rescued the Chancellor and captured the ship.

Now, the eye of not only the Republic fleet, Jedi Temple, Senate or even just Coruscant was focused on the ship. Throughout the galaxy beings had gathered to watch the battle unfold through the HoloNet, had seen the heroic defence of the Republic Home fleet, the superhuman feats of the Jedi which against all the odds had beaten back General Grievous and his Seperatist fleet. Had heard that the famous Jedi heroes Kenobi and Skywalker had even managed the impossible and rescued the Chancellor and taken the Seperatist flagship. And now it seemed to them all for nothing.

The battle had been fought to rescue Supreme Chancellor Palpatine, everything that had been done today; all the sacrifices and losses had been given to save the Chancellor. To those watching, both on Coruscant and throughout the galaxy, it seemed that they had just won the battle to lose the war. Every second the ship kept from breaking up they knew to be a miracle, a sign of the skills of a pilot who as justly legendary, even among the Jedi. But when each second is a miracle, how many can be stung together, many beings wondered.

It is only the younglings across the galaxy that watch the HoloNet in confidence, comforting their elders that there is nothing to worry about, that that there is nothing Skywalker can?t fly, nothing he can?t land. But though the adults pray the younglings are right, most do not take comfort from this. Part of being a grow-up is understanding that heroes are created on the Holonet, that the real-life Skywalker is only a human being, however skilled, no matter how powerful he is in the Force. So they watch the ship descending through Coruscant?s atmosphere with ashes where their hearts should be.

Ashes because their youngings are right, and they are wrong. They are wrong because one pilot, this pilot, is enough. Though the age of heroes may be coming to an end, this one is everything they say about him, and more. He is a legend made flesh.

 

----------------------------------Anakin?s Masterpiece-------------------------------

This is Anakin Skywalker?s masterpiece:

Many people say that he is the best pilot in the galaxy, but this mere talk, created by continual HoloNet references to his unmatched string of kills in starfighter combat. Blowing up vulture fighters and tri-fighters is simply a matter of superior reflexes and trust in the Force; he has spent so much of his life in a cockpit that he wears his Jedi starfighter like clothes. It?s his own body, with thrusters for legs and cannons for fists.

What he is doing now transcends mere flying, the way Jedi combat transcends a schoolyard scuffle.

He sits in a blood-spattered, blaster-chopped chair, behind a console he has never seen before, using controls designed for alien fingers. The ship is not only buckling a like boat attempting to ride out the megawaves of a Kaminoan superstorm, but it?s on fire and is breaking apart like a comet crashing into a gas giant. He has only seconds to learn how to manoeuver an alien craft that not only has no aft control cells, but has no aft at all.

This is, simply put, impossible. It can?t be done.

He?s going to do it anyway.

Because he is Anakin Skywalker, and he doesn?t believe in impossible.

Extending his hands he strokes the controls for a long moment, he feels their shape and listens to each shiver that his lightest touch brings to each part of the remaining control surfaces. He lets their resonances join inside his head to resolve into a harmony like a Feroan joy-harp virtuoso tuning his instrument.

At the same time Anakin extends his perception into the Force until he senses everything; the controls, Obi-Wan, Palpatine, Artoo, the bridge, the remnants of the Hand, the atmosphere of Coruscant and the land there are crashing towards like it is going on inside his head. He also draws power from the Force, drawing from it luck and the preconscious, what-will-happen-in-the-next-ten-seconds that has always been the core of his talent.

And then he begins.

On the downbeat, atmospheric drag fans deploy; he tweaks their angles and cycles them in and out to slow the ship?s decent without burning them off altogether. Their contrabass roars creating a punctuated rhythm like a skipping heartbeat. The forward altitude thrusters, damaged in the space battle above, fire in random directions, but Anakin can feel where they are taking him, and plays them in sequence, adding their choir of voices to his developing concerto.

And the true inspiration, the sparkling note of genius which brings this masterpiece to life, is the soprano counterpoint: the syncopated sequences of exterior hatches opening and closing on the outer hall, that subtly alter the aerodynamics of the ship, creating just the right amount of sideslip, lift or yaw to keep the huge half cruiser steering towards a pinpoint target an eight of the planet away.

It is the Force which makes this possible, and more than the Force. Because feeling Obi-Wan so clearly in the Force with him, Anakin has no interest in a pure accept of what the Force will bring, not here, not now. Once, a lifetime ago it now seemed, his only concern would have been to save his friends lives, no matter the cost. Now, there is more to it for Anakin that just this.

Now, sensing Obi-Wan, he feels fully all that he stands for and has given his life for; the beings throughout the galaxy, the peace and justice of which Obi-Wan and himself have spent their lives upholding. Anakin is determined that this will not be in vain, he will not let the Republic and galaxy fall into chaos, darkness and flames like the ship they are flying it.

He opens himself, letting the Force flood through him, lets its light blaze in him and draws on its power determined not to fail the cause he and Obi-Wan have dedicated their lives to.

He will land the ship.

He will save the Chancellor.

Between his will and the impossible, there is no contest.

 

I think that Anakin and his son Luke both were made to be pilots it's just something that is like walking to others for them.

 

Yes, I do think the name says it all , Jeditheskyisblue!!

 

Great chapters!
You did a wonderful job describing Anakin and his definition of "impossible".
And, of course, Anakin's ability to fly has nothing to do with the ability to land that... part of the cruiser. It's his faith in the Force and in his friends that make him strong enough to make possible the impossible

More soon!!!

 

Another excellent job, Skywalker! When I left you, you were but the learner. Now you are the Master! LOL

Seriously, though...great job! I really enjoyed you meld of Stover's work. I don't think I'd be able to tell the difference unless I pulled out the novel and went line by line. Your writing has really improved significantly. Excellent!

 

Thanks Jadie!!!


Glad you liked Anakin dealing with the impossible, and good points, it was his friends which gave him the strength to do it. The next post should be soon, hopefully tormorrow or Sunday.

Thanks Souderwan!!! praise from you means allot!!


Thanks for reading everyone.

 

(Whew!) I just finished reading all the posts I missed while I was away, and boy did I miss quite a bit!

I love how you manage to fall along the same pathway as the Stover novel does, while still making it unique and enjoyable!

The battle may be over, not so for the war. And I eagerly anticipate when the Chosen One will Rise!

Great job! Keep up the good work!

 

(thanks AP4EVER, glad you've enjoyed it so far, and I really hope you continue to do so. BTW - here's the next part, hope you enjoy)

------------------------------------A New Presence-----------------------------------------

Mace Windu squinted out into the wind whipping his Jedi robes behind him, holding up his hand to ward off the glare created by the orbital mirrors that had been focusing Coruscant?s daylight. His other hand gripped the corrugated hatch-grip in the open troop-bay of a Republic gunship; as it flew along, the daylight from the mirrors was beginning to turn aside allowing a band of twilight to appear above.

The gunship destination was a kilometer-long landing platform in one of the vast industrial sectors of Coruscant. It was marked by a steeply slanting tower of smoke and vapor from a crashed-landed cruiser which rose from the planet?s surface into the upper reaches of Coruscant?s atmosphere, which only now was beginning to drift and spread into a horizon-spanning smear across the stratospheric winds.

Mace could now just about make out the vessel, or what was left of it, resting on a scorched stretch of permacrete. Only a fragment of the ship that had been the Seperatist flagship remained, and that was virtually a burnt-out and shattered shell, apart from the bridge area. Gouts of fire still flared from breaches in hull, despite the fire-suppression foam that had been poured on the ship from five different emergency craft and by the clone troopers that surrounded the ship.

Mace shook his head, Skywalker again. The chosen one.

It could only be him. Only he could have landed this hulk. Only he would have dared.

As the gunship began to land near to the crash-site, respulsors howling, Mace jumped clear, and dashed towards the wreck, turning to give the pilot of the gunship an open-hand gesture to wait; the pilot, faceless behind his mask, responded with a closed fist.

As the escape pod hatch beside the bridge section cycled open, emergency crews rushed in with an escape slide; and a moment later the figures of Supreme Chancellor Palpatine, Obi-Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker materialised on the deck beside the burning ship. They were followed by a somewhat battered R2 unit that was hovering down to the deck on customized booster rockets.

Mace strode out swiftly to meet them, and then halted in disguised surprise looking at the group.

Palpatine robes were torn and tattered at the helm, and he seemed weak, leaning slightly on Skywalker?s one shoulder as the moved away from the ship. On Skywalker?s other side, Master Kenobi appeared somewhat the worse for wear himself; covered with dust and leaking blood from a scalp injury.

But what had caught Mace in surprise was Skywalker himself. It was not just that he looked every bit the HoloNet hero he was supposed to be, towering over his companions as though he had somehow gotten even taller in the mouths since Mace saw him last. His hair was tousled, his color was high, and his walk had the grace of a natural fighter, but there was something more than his physicality, something less definable. He had changed. He radiated a new aura of inner power.

Presence.

It was something that had not been apparent before; as Mace extended his awareness of the Force and focused on this new presence, he was quietly amazed by what he found.

It was not just that Skywalker?s power was more apparent, the anger and troubled confusion that Mace had always sensed around him seemed to be dissipating, vanishing, being replaced by a calm, centered strength. The overconfidence, which boarded on arrogance that he worn as clothing seemed to be transforming into thoughtful awareness, and through it all he was radiating thankful joy and relief.

Skywalker was not the same young man the Council had sent off to the Outer Rim five standard months ago.

While Mace?s frowned thoughtfully, he put the matter from his mind for now and moved again to meet the group.

 

-------------------------------------Breaking News--------------------------------------

?Chancellor,? Mace said as he met them. ?Are you well? Do you require medical attention?? Gesturing to the waiting gunship Mace stated, ?I have a fully equipped field surgery-?

?No, no, no need,? Palpatine said faintly. ?Thank you, Master Windu, but I am unharmed, thanks to these two.?

Nodding, Mace said, ?Master Kenobi? Anakin??

Never better,? Skywalker said, sounding as if he meant it. Kenobi only shrugged, and lightly winced as he touched his head, ?Only a bump to the head. I?m sure the field surgery must be needed elsewhere.?

?It is,? Mace said grimly, ?we don?t even have preliminary estimates on civilian causalities yet.? He waved the gunship away.

Turning towards the Chancellor, Mace stated, ?We have a shuttle on it?s immediately to take you to the floor of the Senate, to give an immediate statement to the Republic.?

?Of course, Master Windu.? Touching Mace on the arm he said, ?you have always been of great assistance to me.?

?The Jedi are honored to serve the Senate,? Mace replied, giving just slight emphasis on the word Senate. Subtly removing his arm Mace fell back to the Jedi, asking, ?Do you have anything else to report, Master Kenobi? What of General Grievous??

?Escaped, like the coward he is.? Mace nodded, as if this was to be expected. ?But Count Dooku was there also, holding the Chancellor. In the consequent duel, he was killed,? Kenobi responded.

 

---------------------------------Fault-lines and Destiny-part 1----------------------------------

?Dooku?s dead??, Mace couldn?t believe what he was hearing. ?You actually killed him??, Mace looked in astonishment from Kenobi to Skywalker and back.

?Well,? Kenobi said, lightly touching his head injury, ?it was a down to my young friend here, I was,? he smiled, ?taking a nap.?

?But..? Mace started to say.

?But??, Dooku was the figure-head of the Confederacy, he was the cement that kept it?s disparate leadership welded together. He was to the Confederacy what Palpatine was to the Republic. Without him the Confederacy would splinter apart in a matter of weeks.

Of days.

In the end all Mace could say was, ?but??. Then he almost, not quite, but almost cracked a smile.

?Anakin, that?s the best news I?ve heard since?? Mace started, ?How did you do it??

Skywalker presence seemed to grow quieter and deeper in response to this question, and his face expressed a degree of pride, but its main expression that Mace could decipher was one of relief. This was heightened from his presence in the Force, causing Mace to become puzzled again with change that seemed to have come over Skywalker as he responded,

?We fought, Master Windu, it was close but I managed to survive intact and defeat him. But he then tried to kill the Chancellor, forcing me to kill him,? Skywalker responded softly but firmly.

It was the term ?I managed to survive intact?, which caught Mace?s attention, and he immediately realised that Skywalker had not been primarily referring towards the physical battle, but rather that another personal and greater danger had been avoided. This he now saw was the cause of the relief that Skywalker was projecting; and Mace realised the mission to rescue the Chancellor and the confrontation with Dooku had been the catalyst for the profound changes he could sense happening in Skywalker.

For some reason, sensing this change Mace felt an emotion that had long been absent from his life, since before Geonosis, one he thought never to have felt again: hope.

 

----------------------------Fault-lines and Destiny ?part 2-------------------------------------

Breaking from this retrieve Mace found that Palpatine was speaking again; praising Skywalker?s duelling skill and his loyalty to his friends. Concerned Mace, and he noted Obi-Wan, both noticed Skywalker?s pride rise in the face of these compliments, but to his approval he felt Skywalker take control and shake himself free of the pride taking hold of him.

Mace frowned, none one the Jedi Council had been happy with Skywalker?s close friendship with Palpatine, and had more than one conversation with Obi-Wan about it when Skywalker was still his Padawan. Now, seeing the negative influence, unintentional as it might be, over the chosen one at what was clearly shaping into a crucial moment in his development, Mace grew concerned.

Turning to Skywalker, he stated, ?The Council will await your full report on this matter,? giving just enough emphasis on full, to get his point across.

Skywalker responded with a respectful bow of the head, replying ?yes, Master.? And again Mace was surprised by the change in Skywalker. He had never known him to be this acquiescing of such a request in the past.

Turning to Palpatine Mace said, ?With Dooku dead, the Confederacy will be in confusion. Now is the time to sue for peace, Chancellor.?

As the Chancellor started to answer, Mace Windu reached into the Force.

As he did the world crystallized around them, becoming a gem of reality, shot through with flaws and fault-lines of possibilities. It was Mace?s particular gift: to see how people and situations fitted into the Force, to find the sheer planes that can cause them to break in useful ways and to know the best way to implement a strike that would bring about the desired break. He was not always able decipher what the structures meant, particularly since the rising of a darkening cloud on the Force due to the re-emergence of the Sith. But he always able to determine where the shatterpoints lay.

Now looking at the three figures, he saw they, and particularly Skywalker, were at the center of a lattice of fault-lines and stress fractures so staggeringly powerful that its structure was beyond calculation. Skywalker seemed to blaze with the light of the living Force in a manner Mace had never seen before, and powerful lines linked him and Obi-Wan, these fault-lines radiated with the light of comradeship and shared love and sacrifice, seemingly being strengthened by the living Force radiating from Skywalker.

Another set of fault-lines lead off slightly behind and to the side of Skywalker, to Palpatine. These faults were of a different kind, fault-lines of destiny, which connected Skywalker and Palpatine together. The lattices of these faults stank of the dark side.

However, the dark side that so strongly clouded Mace?s perception made any determination of what destiny impossible; except that when the deciding events of their time occurred, these two would play pivotal roles. What he could see, and clearly, was that Skywalker was himself the shatterpoint of the structure. And the lines leading to him were already so delicate that any shift deriving from Skywalker?s action could cause colossal and decisive fracturing. Anything could happen.

Anything at all.

?I am afraid,? the Chancellor stated as Mace snapped back into time, ?without Count Dooku, there is nothing to restrain General Grievous? murderous lust for slaughter. Until he is stopped the war will continue.?

?Perhaps the Seperatist Council could be asked to restrain him in return for some considerations?? Mace asked.

?What!!? Palpatine responded hotly, ?Leave systems remaining in Confederacy hands!! No Master Windu, only a total surrender is acceptable. While Grievous lives that will never be possible.?

?Then the Jedi will make finding General Grievous our highest priority,? Mace said.

Glancing first at Anakin and Obi-Wan, he then leaning close to Palpatine and whispered, in a voice low

 

This is a very interesting story! I like the small changes you've made that give Anakin a chance to refuse Palpatine's offers and his seduction to the dark side. Your style works well with Stover's novel, it will be good to see how you work with the rest of it.

 

Sometimes the smallest action or inaction can change the future. I love your more mature Anakin.

I have to complement you on your writing. Now although I've seen the movie, I haven't read the novelization. So I know what changes you're making, but I can't (casually reading) distinguish where you're writing begins and Stover's writing ends. Good job.

 

Well done! I liked how you were able to depict Mace's thoughts and feelings regarding Anakin's change in demenor and in the force. I wonder if Mace will take this to the Council? I can't wait to find out!

I eagerly await the next post! Keep up the good work!

 

As I've said so many times before...your writing continues to get better and better with every post! Fantastic job. I love how your story parallels the novel so well. A major decision by Anakin at a critical juncture has minor rippling effects throughout the story. It truly is getting better and better.

Keep up the good work.

 

Thanks, Shadowwolf and JuniorPadawan!! Glad your likely how the story is changing, at the moment the changes are subtle but I hope your enjoying it as the new story develops!!

To AP4EVER, that you very much for the compliments, and you see how the Jedi Masters start interacting with Mace!

Thankyou very much, Souderwan, your compliments are appricaited greatly!1

Thanks for reading everyone !!

 

So Mace knows that Anakin is the shatterpoint of what ever is going to happen. Either Anakin will do the right thing or he would do the wrong thing.

 

Mace is starting to trust Anakin, alright. Maybe he shouldn't... it's too soon to conclude anything...

This scene of Mace going to meet Ani and Obi was in the novelization? (If it is, that's why I love novelizations. They give us details and little scenes that I usually enjoy!)

I really like what you are doing with ROTS, Skywalker! I just realized it, because I no longer can go on with my life, without checking first if you've written another bit!

I know that I must sound crazy (I've been writing this everytime I review this fic), but I'm really glad that... WE'RE GOING TO SEE PADMÉ!!!