Saga The Chosen One Rises - Alternate ROTS novel (based off the Stover novel) *Completed*

Outstanding, Skywalker. Every time I read your work it grows and improves. I am absolutely impressed with this story. The subtlety of it all! You're doing a great job of bringing the reader into the story but keeping them slightly at arm's length, too. I love it! Great job! Keep it up!

BTW, I love the 3 post thing you do. I like getting a bunch to read at once!

 

I love these "pivotal moment" stories, in which one decision or one thought can change the whole course of events.

Great job with the tone and blending it with the novel. Can't wait to read more!

 

Okay, so I'm back. I do appreciate the fact that while things are different, not much has changed. Of course, the stuff that has been changed makes for interesting character studies.

 

HALLELUJAH!!!

They're together!!! Now, where's Marvin Gaye when you need him?

Can you tell I'm happy? I think you can!

Wonderful posts! Although it doesn't take a genius to tell which was my favorite.

If I couldn't wait for your other posts before, now I really can't!!!

 

You and Souderwan both do the Stoverizing very well. Not only have I not actually read the Stover novel except in a few bits and pieces in the bookstore (shock! horror!), I could never do that myself. But I can appreciate it if it's done well, and you do.

Waiting to see what the next "significant deviation" is.

 

Thanks Commander21K, I'm glad that your likely this story, and hope you will continue to like it as it develops.

Souderwan, you know I can't really judge for myself how my style is developing or if I am getting any better, so it's great to know that I am a little bit, and glad my take on the story seems to be working. As for the 3-post thing, I tend to write a bunch down and then post it.

Darth Mousche, glad you like this how I played out what I felt was a pivotal moment differently, and that you like the tone and the style, cheers.

Ace_Vemon, glad you like the characteristations, you stubbled on to my cunning plan, my main aim at this stage (though I think that will change a couple posts in the future) was to show particularly Anakin's change internally as well as a few other characters changing developments in a minor way. I though about changing events, but felt at this stage I would be changing them for the sake of it, and that did not seem a good enough reason (on the other hand, mabye I just not very creative, oh, well, we will see when the story diverges more from the Stover novel)

AP4EVER - glad your happy the Padme has finally turned up, I know it has been a long wait for you. The next post should conern Anakin and Padme exculisively, which should keep you happy, hopefully I'll have it done by tommorow, (mabye even tonight, but we will have to see)

Arcalian - Gald you've enjoyed my AU take on the Stover novel and how I'm subtly attering the format of the novel to fit it, as Souderwan said, for the moment at least I am more wedded to the novel them his, but I'm glad it's seems to be working, thanks!!

And thanks for reading everyone !!!

 

C'mon! Don't stop now! Update again! Soon!

 

(Your wish is my command Zaphod_Kenobi! Here's the next part everyone. It's slightly shorter then my usual 3-posts, but I'm coming up next to a another big 'divergence point' of sorts, and I want a bit more time to write. Hopefully that will appear either tomorrow or Sunday, anyway, here the next part, and I hope you guys enjoy. BTW - if your looking for a good fic that just started, you should try Jadie's, I think she's (am I right?) put the link in her signiture)

------------------------------Padme Amidala--------------------------------------------

This is Padmé Amidala.

An astonishingly accomplished woman, who has in her time been the youngest Queen to ever elected to serve Naboo, a daring partisan guerrilla leader, and elegant, articulated voice of reason in the Republic Senate.

But she is, at this moment, none of these things.

She can still play them ? she pretends to be a Senator, she wields the moral authority of a Queen, and she?s no above using her reputation for physical courage in a fierce political debate.

But in reality she is none of these things, not anymore. Deep down, in the core of her being, her most fundamental reality is this:

She is Anakin Skywalker?s wife.

Yet wife is too weak a word to express the truth of her; it is such a small word, a common word that in a down-turned month can carry so many petty, unpleasant echoes.

For Padmé Amidala, to say she is Anakin Skywalker?s wife is no more or less than to say, I am alive.

Her life before Anakin belonged to someone else, some poor impoverished spirit. To a being who had no comprehension of how profoundly life could be lived, a being to be pitied.

He real life began when she looked into Anakin Skywalker?s eyes and found there, not the uncritical worship of little Ani of Tatooine; but the smouldering passion of a powerful Jedi; a young man, it was true, but every inch a man ? one who?s legend was already beginning to grow within the Jedi Order and beyond. A man who knew what he wanted and was honest enough to simply ask for it; strong enough to express his deepest feeling before her without shame or fear. A man who had loved her with a patient and faithful heart for a decade, while he awaited an act of destiny that would open her heart to the fire of his.

However, though she has loved her husband without reservation, love has not blinded her to the faults within him. She is older than him, and wiser enough to understand the one she loves better than he does himself. She knows him to be prideful, and moody, and quick to anger ? but these faults have caused her to love him all the more because she has known them to more than balanced by the greatness in his character; his capacity for joy and cleansing laughter, his generosity of spirit and devotion of service not only to her and the Jedi, but to every living creature in the galaxy. But, these faults have caused her worry and fear for her husband at times.

He has always been a wild creature who has come tamely to her hand, a vine tiger purring contently at her cheek. Every soft touch, loving glace or word is a small miracle in itself, how could she not be grateful for such gifts.

She has always fought to keep their marriage from the public eye because she knew that her husband needed to be a Jedi. Saving people is what he was born for; to have to take that away would cripple every good thing in his troubled heart.

But now she senses a change in her husband, while the joy she knows so wells seems to be beaming ever greater from his face, there is a another look in his face that she can never remember being there before, a look of calm, even peace, seems to her to radiate from his face. He seemed both more subdued and yet at the same time stronger in himself then she had ever remembered. With their hearts uniting she can feel that much of the turmoil clouding his heart has been evaporated by a new light.

These changes leave her in a state of anxiety and hope combined as she wonders at what the ch

 

------------------------------Life-changing news-----------------------------------

After an all-too-brief eternity, the kiss at last ended.

She clung to him, for a while just breathing in his presence, murmuring love against his broad strong chest while he murmured love into the coils of her softly scented hair.

Eventually, she found her voice again, ?Anakin, Anakin, oh my Anakin, I ? I can?t believe your home. They told me??, she almost choked repeating the words, ?that you had been killed. I couldn?t ? every day-?

Never believe stories like that,? he whispered. ?Never. You would know if that ever happened, Padmé.?

I?ve lived a year for every hour you were away-?

?It?s been a lifetime. Two.?

?Your different, something?s changed,? she said, looking up at him, and lightly creasing his right cheek.

A distant look suddenly came across his face, as if he his attention had been brought back to something important. As he looked back down at her, a small but joyful smile crossed his face and he replied,

?Something happened while I was on the Seperatist flagship, during the fight with Dooku and beyond, I, I survived the trial, Padmé!.? He seemed to find it hard to find the words to express his feelings, though she felt an enormous sense of relief glowing from him, ?I nearly did something horrible, like Tatooine, but, thanks to Obi-Wan, I was able to stop myself.?

The smile spread on his face, and she felt the joy rise in her heart, displacing her anxiety as he began to say, ?I feel better now, Padmé that I can ever remember feeling,? pulling her into an carefree embrace, ?I feel free!?

She smiled up at him as tears streamed down her face, for the first time forgetting the HoloNet crews which remained only a short distance away in the Atrium along with Palpatine and the Senators.

Suddenly, looking down at her, his joyous smile grew quizzical, a questioning look growing in his eyes, stating, ?I?m not the only one who?s changed. There something different about you, something-?

She saw a look of shock and surprise cross his face, followed by a wild, almost explosive expression of joy, and realised with a jolt that he had just sensed the truth, and her heart caught at the sight, knowing in that expression of joy, that whatever other changes may have happened to him in the recent battle, or in his five month service in the Outer Rim, he was still her Annie.

She watched further as all their child meant began to cycle through his mind, the realisation that their marriage could no longer remain secret, that even the voluminous robes she wore could not conceal her pregnancy forever. It would mean he would be cast from the Jedi Order in disgrace, and she would be relieved of her post and recalled to Naboo. The very celebrity that had made him so important to the war would turn against them, as they became the freshest meat for an entire galaxy of scandal-mongers.

She saw all this pass through his mind in seconds, and saw him accept it, as if he had already made a similar decision. As if to confirm this he began to say, ?That?s wonderful, Padmé, it?s wonderful! I guess that decides it?.

?Decides what?? she asked worriedly.

Smiling down to her, he responded, ?All the way to meet you I?ve been thinking of the words to tell you that I felt I should confess our marriage to the Council.? Smiling wryly at her, he furthered, ?this kind of makes this confession a necessity.?

?Why would you want that,? she demanded desperately.

Looking slightly away, he responded, ?It?s not a matter of want, Padmé, but what is right. I?ll never believe our marriage is wrong; it, and now this child, are the brightest lights in my life. But the deception and lying was; I was being selfish. I know the lying to my fellow-Jedi, and most of all, to Obi-Wan has to end.?

Turning to look at her again, he had pleading look in his eyes, ?you have to understand, Padmé,? he said urgently, ?I don?t want bring hurt to you, but it?s something I h

 

BEAUTIFUL!

 

Fantastic! I absolutely love the changes--so seamlessly entered into the text and so beautifully wedded. Simply outstanding!

Diddy: You're not supposed to use this site to advertise. You've posted that link on 11 different sites. That's a pretty crappy thing to do and you might find yourself kicked outta here (although I doubt you'll care too much).

 

Wonderful! This is just perfect!
Anakin being mature and trusting Obi-Wan is just great!
Although, I'm not sure if it would be wise to tell the Council about Padmé's condition, just yet...

Nice job!

 

Great job! Well written, and I like where you're going with it.

 

...Words cannot express how well written and how utterly beautiful these posts are. They were so emotional and loving, that I have tears in my eyes even as I write this.

Skywalker, you have no idea how gifted you are in your writing.

I anxiously await the next post.

 

A mature Anakin. We all know you could do it.


As much as we hate Palpatine we must love him too. For without good old Palpy there isn't Star Wars. And what would we do without that?

 

Thank you very much everyone,

I'm glad you liked these last posts Arcalian!!

Souderwan, I'm glad you've liked what I've done with these last scenes, and how I worked them out, and I will second you words to Diddy, the fan fic board is really not the place to advertise

Jadie, I'm really glad you enjoyed this last post and like the more mature Anakin, without the dark side clouding his mind and generating suspicion in him towards Obi-Wan, Anakin is now beginning to realise just how much Obi-Wan does care for him

DarthDolly, glad your enjoying the direction of the story,

AP4EVER - I hoped you would enjoy these last posts, and I am very pleased to see it worked out, thank you for the good words

JuniorPadawan - I glad wou liked the more mature Anakin, and it seems I'm pulling this change off, and your right, as much as we hate ol' Palpy, without him there would be no story,

Thanks for reading everyone !!

 

(hey everyone, here's the next section of the story, hope you enjoy, it's slightly different to what I've posted before, I hope you enjoy it)

---------------------------------Dreams and visions-part 1--------------------------------------

Anakin found himself looking upon a new scene:

Padmé, was lying down on a medical bed within the bright white surroundings of a Coruscant MedLab, while medical droids working deftly around her. Padmé was crying out in pain; as Anakin moved forward towards her, she turned her head the side, to a figure on her left, who head her hand. Anakin realised with a shock, the figure was himself. She smiled up at the Anakin in the scene, the pain on her face easing into joy and asked:

?Which is it, Anakin, boy or girl??

The Anakin he saw was smiling down at her, his face a picture of pure, uncomplicated joy as, holding her hand, he whispered gently to her, ?both, Padmé! We have twins, a wonderful boy and a beautiful girl.?

Padmé broke into tears of joy, and both her and the Anakin in the scene radiated love and joy as the medical droids placed the twins in the arms of their parents. Looking down at the baby girl she cradled in arms and whispered, ?Leia?, and turning to the boy held in his? double?s arms, looked up at his double questioningly, who smiled down at her and whispered in return, ?Luke?.

Anakin looks on in astonishment and joy, and the single thought that passes through his head is; twins, is it possible I could be this blessed?

Staring on the tableau of love and contentment, the burst of joy Anakin begins to feel at the realisation he is to be father of twins is relplaced by confusion as the scene disappears, and everything around him blurs and shifts.

Suddenly a new scene takes it?s place, an alien medical facility taking the place of the Corucant MedLab, again, Padmé lay upon a medical bed in child birth, but now, he was not there, and she was screaming in pain, she was, he saw, with a chilling realisation, now, in this scene, dying. And in her delirium and pain, she repeating one phrase,

?Anakin, I?m sorry. I love you. I love you ??

No! Anakin screamed inside as he ran towards her, and found himself running into smoke and sulphurous fumes, onto a landing deck, amidst a hellish landscape of jagged hills, mountains and volcanoes of obsidian rock, and rivers of burning lava that streamed from the volcanoes and flowed through the landscape.

 

---------------------------------Dreams and Visions-Part 2-------------------------------------

Confused, Anakin looked around, and saw Padmé silvered Nubian skiff, and turning around saw her, with a dark, threatening figure choking her through the Force. This is how she was hurt Anakin realised, and rushed forward to stop the figure hurting her, but his legs feel like lead as he runs forward, and as he draws near, a new dread grows in his heart.

The smoke clears, and suddenly he sees the face of the figure hurting his wife; and wishes he did not, that he could tear the eyes out of his face. It is a face with an inhuman, feral expression, and it?s eyes are eyes of fire, the fire of the dark side, like the those he has seen burn in Assji Ventress, and in the face of the Zabrak Sith, thirteen years ago, when he was a boy. It is the face of a being consumed and twisted by the dark side, but it is his face, he realised in horror.

Paralyzed by terror, he shuts his eyes to block out the scene, until a familiar presence comes beside him, and a comforting hand lightly squeezes his shoulder, and suddenly the fear, confusion and horror leave him, replaced by peace and calm . He opened his eyes again to see a sandy, desert hovel a short distance away under a night-time sky on Tatooine, in the space-port of Mos Espa; with a shock, one among many, Anakin recognises his home as a boy, and looking to his side sees the strong, bearded face of a familiar Jedi Master looking down upon him with compassion.

 

-------------------------------------Acceptance---------------------------------------------

?Qui-Gon!?, Anakin cried out in surprise, ?where am I.?

Looking towards him, Qui-Gon replied, ?you have been dreaming, Anakin, you have been seeing things which could be. Right now, we talking within this dream?

Understanding began to flood back into Anakin mind, and he responded, ?premonitions, I?ve been dreaming about the future, like I did with my mother.? Looking up to the peaceful face of Qui-Gon, which seemed so full of compassion, Anakin asked desperately, ?but why the two visions, Master Jinn, why in one does Padmé?? his voice choked off, as he could not bring himself to finish.

?Calm yourself, Anakin? Qui-Gon began gently, ?search your feelings, you already know the answer.?

As he did, the burning truth hit him, but he accepted it, he had to, he realised. ?The second vision,? he began, ?is what could have happened if I had killed Dooku, if I had murdered him, I would have fallen, have become that creature of hate, a being who could hurt Padmé!?

?Yes,? Qui-Gon began gravely, ?and it is a threat which still hangs over you, that because of your fear of the deaths of those you love you may turn to the dark side to seek a way to stop it.?

?But,? Anakin responded, remembering the vision of him consumed by darkness, choking Padmé, ?by trying to use the dark side to save those I love, I would destroy them.?

?Yes,? Qui-Gon returned, ?no one is strong enough, or can become so, to stop death, nor should anyone seek to prevent someone?s death when the time is right. To try to do so only leads to further suffering and destruction. The desire becomes greed, which is of the dark side, and darkness can only destroy, not create, Anakin.?

Shaking and sinking to his knees, Anakin whispered hoarsely, ?what must I do, Master Jinn??

?Accept it, death is a part of life, it is a part of the Force.? Qui-Gon furthered, ?when someone dies, they become part of the Force; all they are remains a part of it. Their true being can never cease to be in its light, unless that being has been by consumed by darkness. And staying within the path of compassion, it is even possible to retain consciousness within the Force, as I have.?

?Use your love for those you care for to give you the strength to honor what you all live for, and resist the darkness? Qui-Gon continued. ?Manage this and what they are can never be destroyed, while to betray what you all stand for will inevitably destroy them, one way or the other.?

At this moment, on his knees, Anakin realises the truth of Qui-Gon?s words, to attempt to save the lives but betray what they lived their lives for would destroy them. But keeping what they fought for alive, their love and the ideals they believed in, what they are would always remain and live in these things. By accepting in their ultimate deaths and transformation into the Force, all they are would be part of the Force. They would die, but what they were could not cease to be.

It is difficult, but in the end, Anakin realises, there is no other choice, so he choices, and accepts it, and as his dragon attempts to whisper, ?everything dies, Anakin Skywalker, even the stars burn out?, Anakin replies,

?Yes, but the star?s effect and presence live on in the universe, and in the eternal Force.? As he says this, and determines he will not let the darkness destroy everything he and all those he cares for have devoted the lives to, either within himself or in the galaxy, the dragon insides begins to fade away, into the peace and light that starts to shine through his being.

As the light flood through him, Qui-Gon and the Mos Espa landscape fades, and Qui-Gon parting words he hears only distantly, ?remember Anakin, compassion is the answer to the darkness??

Anakin opened his eyes, awaking to a darkened room. Rising up, his hand of flesh found coils of sweat-damp silken sheets around his waist, and he remembers where he is. Looking beside him, he

 

Lovely! This is really top-notch. You might want to look out for some minor grammer errors here and there which are a little distracting, but the meat of the story is outstanding! I'm really enjoying this.

I love your introduction of QGJ. I especially enjoy the dual vision thing. It demonstrates that Anakin hasn't licked his dark-side problem quite yet but he's well on his way. I also enjoyed how you took this idea and kept running with it. You didn't just show an alternate dream but you had Anakin conversing with QGJ. That's great stuff. Keep up the great work!

 

HEAV-VY!

Using Qui-Gon to help Anakin interpret his visions and to accept death, was clever and well written! Bravo!


But it's not over yet! There's still plenty to be done! And I can't wait for it! Keep up the good work!

 

Now he knows he must make the right choice, and he knows philosophicly how to get there, but not specifically how to get there.

And he doesn't yet know about Palpatine.

Wonder what it will take for him to do the math.

 

That was wonderful, Skywalker!

You're right, it was a little different from the usual, but still great (if not even greater)!

I was really disappointed when I found out that Qui-Gon wasn't in ROTS. But I liked your idea! It just gave Anakin a "sneak preview" of what his life could be if he turned or didn't turn to the Dark Side!

I just hope that when Padmé asks him "What about Obi-Wan", he says they should tell him!


OOHHH... And thanks for the publicity Skywalker! And, I don't know why, the link on my sig doesn't work!

 

Thanks you?re your responses everyone!!

Souderwan, I?m really glad you liked this dream-sequence, I had it in my head from the start, but was worried in writing it whether it was going to come of right or not, I?m glad to see seems to have succeeded.

AP4EVER, I really glad you liked the Qui-Gon/Anakin conversation, and how he aided in bring Anakin to a place to accept death, and turn fully from the dark side. It a fairly important development point in the story, and therefore I?m glad it worked.

Arcalian ? Yes, Anakin is beginning to fully realise just how much counts on him making the right decisions, but at the moment it?s general understanding. As you say, he does not suspect Palpatine, though a suspicion has began of Sith influence?

Thanks Jadie, for all your good words, glad you liked this little dream sequence, it didn?t appear in the novel, but for my alternate story it is quite important. It is interesting confronting Anakin with both potential futures, and I also would have liked Qui-Gon in the movie (he does appear in the novel, at least his voice). And I was interested in involving him in this story, aiding Anakin. And I figured within a dream, he could appear visibly to Anakin as well. No probs about promotion of your story, I happen to think it?s pretty good.

Thanks for reading everyone !!

 

(hey everyone, here the next part of the story, hope you all enjoy)

---------------------------The Calm before the Storm-part 1-----------------------------------

Anakin had moved through the flight of stairs from Padmé?s bed-chamber to walk out onto the veranda that overlooked the private landing bay of her Senatorial apartments. Holding the night-chilled rail, Anakin stared out across the Coruscant nightscape.

It was still burning.

In the wreckage and flames Anakin felt a premonition of what would happen to the galaxy if he failed; a place of chaos, flame and darkness.

And now more than just the physical damage was evident to him. Through the nightscape Anakin could feel the presence of the dark side cloaking the city planet, its stench was everywhere. It was something he had never noticed till that moment; he realised with a sobering shock, that until this last day he had been walking such a dark road he had not sensed what was all around him.

Joy and gratitude rush through him, towards Qui-Gon and the Force, at being provided with the ability to avoid the fate that had so nearly been his, of becoming the inhuman being of his dreams. Focusing his attention back onto the scene before him, Anakin begins to reach out, begins to drift out into the currents of the Force flowing through Coruscant, to the never ending rushing traffic of speeders and ships soaring through the city?s atmosphere; to the tall buildings bustling inside with multiple beings of all kinds in the midst of the whirl of life. This whirl has become subdued and worried though, in the presence of such destruction. This had been day the war had come home to Coruscant, though Anakin begins to realise, with the darkness he now feels everywhere, it has never been that far away at all.

Beyond this he senses the Temple; it?s presence like of beacon of light, a burning star, shining in the Force. Though dimmed now, both by the dark shroud covering the city planet, and by the loss of so many Jedi through the war, it still shone strong and bright in the Force. Finally, he senses the mushroomed-shaped building of the Senate, and the vast residential complex of Five Hundred Republic, containing Palpatine?s own residence. The darkness seemed stronger around these areas to Anakin, and as he focused his attention towards this area, Anakin suddenly felt his blood freeze up as everything turned cold.

Arctic.

He had had a similar feeling in the presence of Dooku, but this was stronger, it had the feeling of deadly cold, like the cold heart of deep space.

It was Darth Sidious, Anakin realised in stunned amazement. He could feel him, here, on Coruscant, in Five Hundred Republica.

Shaken, Anakin tried to reach further and pierce the icy darkness, but just found the darkness and cold intensifying against his attempts to penetrate it.

As his snapped back into himself, Anakin looked down to see that his artificial hand had twisted the metal railing under his grip.

As the shocking realisation continued to dawn on Anakin that Sidious was not merely on Coruscant but within Five Hundred Republica the suspicion that Palpatine may be being influenced by the mysterious Sith Lord came rushing back.

Anakin remained stilled in shocked silence as the terrible realisation dawned in his mind: with Sidious? presence within Five Hundred Republic, added to darkness he had sensed around Palpatine, and the variety of events around the attack and kidnap of Palpatine that suggested a Seperatist source inside the Chancellor?s circle, his previous suspicion was no longer mere suspicion, it was, he realised grimly, a fact. There was no other explanation.

Anakin thought darkly, while the Jedi and many others had fought and sacrificed themselves bravely to save the Republic, the Sith had insulated themselves in the highest levels of government in the Republic. If Sidious was not exposed, soon, Anakin thought, all this death and sacrifice would be for nothing. The rescue that Obi-Wan and himself had j