Saga The Clothes Make the Hermit -- Dress up Obi-Wan Challenge, one-shot

Title: The Clothes Make the Hermit
Author: ardavenport (aka Anne Davenport)
Timeframe: between trilogies, Post-ROTJ, Pre-ANH
Genre: humor, Dress Up Obi-Wan Challenge
Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, ghostly Qui-Gon, OCs
Keywords Obi-Wan Kenobi, Tatooine, hermit
Summary: Obi-Wan needs new clothes.
Notes: Typo is my middle name, with missing words and errors that spell checkers don?t catch being my speciality ? if you see any, just post a reply or send a PM with the what and where and I will kill them with no mercy.
Disclaimer: All characters belong to George and Lucasfilm; I?m just playing in their sandbox.


Oooouuuhhh-bong.

The soft entry chime alerted the dozing clerk. The small, lithe creature peered at the robed figure in the doorway.

Ben Kenobi paused at the entrance of the Mos Eisley shop, and let his eyes adjust to its shadowed interior. Compared to the blazing sun outside, everything else was dark and shaded. And marginally cooler.

The very blue-faced woman looked him over, but didn?t get up from her clerk?s desk. Having identified him as not-a-threat, she shrugged, her hand idly waving toward the shop?s offerings. A couple of stooped customers grumbled through the bins.

Ben walked into the large, sunken area of the store. Everything was loosely sorted in bins. Domestic utensils and decoration to the left. Tools, fixtures and droid parts to the right. Clothing in the middle going all the way to the back of the store. He?d been in this store soon after he had arrived on Tatooine to purchase a spare pair of pants, blankets, cooking tools and other things that he?d never had to concern himself with in his life before. Years had passed and this store looked exactly the same as the last time he?d been in it, except that the clerk had been older and even less helpful than the slight creature that occupied the front desk now.

This place was a fixture in Mos Eisley. Conveniently located near the slave housing areas, it charitably sold the usable refuse of society for relatively modest prices.

Ben scanned the overflowing bins. Organization was minimal. He passed by the bins of things obviously too small or too big for him. A young girl plowed through one brightly colored, sparkling pile, holding up first one and then another damaged showgirl?s gowns and bindings. She held one, mostly intact, pale blue halter top outfit to her own underdeveloped body and then dropped it into a small pile at her feet. Ben Kenobi thought that she looked far too young to be thinking about improving her station through her looks, but on a planet like Tatooine, it was practical.

Ben stopped at one heaping bin of clothes that looked approximately his size. Pants first. That was, indeed, why he had chosen to come to Mos Eisley now, instead of in a few days as he?d originally planned.

He had gotten up early, in the cool of the morning, to meditate, as he always did. He had felt the presence of his long dead Master, Qui-Gon Jinn, every morning. Sometimes they spoke, sometimes Qui-Gon appeared as a welcome, ghostly image, sometimes Obi-Wan just sank deeply into his own thoughts, his old Master hovering nearby. It had taken him years of contemplation, of patiently sorting through the debris of his own scarred past, but he had reached enough internal equilibrium so that he could reach to Qui-Gon when he needed. His late afternoons and evenings were spent watching over the son of his fallen apprentice, and in training with Qui-Gon, for when he would join the Force himself, when his time came. But his mornings were for himself.

He had knelt and a sudden twinge in his knee had caused him to land hard on the floor. The sound of his pants ripping in the back had immediately followed. Somewhere in the currents of the Force, Qui-Gon Jinn had been very amused.

His morning routine had been destroyed. When he had inspected the damage, he?d found that it had torn along the seam; the fabric was simply worn too thin. They couldn?t be fixed

 

That was great, ardavenport. I could just picture the whole thing, and poor Obi-Wan getting more and more frustrated with shopping. Of course, what else did he have to do? LOL.

Loved the idea of stripes and him wearing something appalling.

Good job.

 

You painted a very detailed, vivid picture here!

Somewhere in the Force, Qui-Gon Jinn chuckled.

?You don?t have to look for clothes,? Ben muttered as he put his boots back on.

//You?re treating this as a chore, Obi-Wan,// Qui-Gon replied. Qui-Gon always used his old name. Ben sensed his Master?s presence in the stall with him, which was very disquieting in the confined space.

?Isn?t it?? He re-wrapped his improvised skirt.

//You are forced into acquiring something new. Why not use it as an opportunity?//

Absolutely loved the interaction between Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon! A superb response to the challenge!

 

beautiful job, i love all the little details.

Obi-Wan's growing frustration, not just with the clothes, but with the whole situation was so palpably real.

i love how Qui-Gon's presence was both comforting and pesky. vintage Qui.

 

A great challenge fic ardavenport...

He had knelt and a sudden twinge in his knee had caused him to land hard on the floor. The sound of his pants ripping in the back had immediately followed. Somewhere in the currents of the Force, Qui-Gon Jinn had been very amused.

I loved this - the images made me giggle.

The conversations between Qui and Obi were wonderfully done - a great portrayal of their 'new relationship' and all the ups and downs that go with it. And Qui giving Obi advice about fashion was very funny!

Loved how Obi was wearing a skirt as well!

 

Satisfied with this reaction from his Master, he experimented with grinning in the mirror and imagined himself crossing the desert in clothes that made himself look like a flag.

This sentence made me laugh!

Well done!

 

Poor Obi-Wan...

Forced to go *(shudder* shopping!

I loved the various clothes he tried on.

How fitting he ended up choosing a robe that would make him look like a Jedi.

Awesome response to the challenge

 

Everything was loosely sorted in bins. Domestic utensils and decoration to the left. Tools, fixtures and droid parts to the right. Clothing in the middle going all the way to the back of the store.

I think I've been in that store! I get all my stuff from there, too!

Ben finally took the large cloth that he used to keep dust off of his work space and made an improvised skirt out of it.

Oh, dear. Oh, dear, oh dear. It would be just Obi-Wan's luck to have ANH start right here.

VADER: Your powers are weak, old man. And you're wearing a dress. You should try black next time. It's very slimming.

OBI-WAN: Yes, well not everyone can have a body built by Ford, Mr. "Abs of steel."

He put that outfit aside and tried the striped tunic next. On top of that, he put on an overcoat of pink and brown diagonal stripes and pants with dingy yellow and black horizontal stripes.

AIIIGGH!! *Now* I've got mental images of an AU in which he spends ANH in *that.* The twin suns could only make it worse.

LUKE: Ben? Ben Ke--OH SWEET MOTHER OF MERCY MY EYES!!!

It was not a Jedi robe. But when he wore it, it would be a Jedi?s robe.

Very nice distinction, and a fitting (no pun intended) way of showing that Obi-Wan has come to accept that a person is not defined by external things, but rather the reverse.

I always did wonder where Obi-Wan's ANH outfit had come from. I guess now I know: the thrift store. (I still don't know how he did laundry out in the Jundland Wastes, but alas, this is likely to remain a mystery.)

A very cute story, with some laugh-out-loud moments.

 

dianethx: That was great, ardavenport. I could just picture the whole thing, and poor Obi-Wan getting more and more frustrated with shopping. Of course, what else did he have to do? LOL.

Loved the idea of stripes and him wearing something appalling.

Poor guy has never had to go looking for clothes before. Jedi have such sheltered lives in some ways. Glad you liked it!

VaderLVR64: You painted a very detailed, vivid picture here!
.....
Absolutely loved the interaction between Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon! A superb response to the challenge!

Thanks! They are a fun pair to do, especially when Obi-Wan doesn?t care who sees him talking to Qui-Gon. That just reinforces his ?crazy old hermit? persona.

Jennifer_Lyn: beautiful job, i love all the little details.

Obi-Wan's growing frustration, not just with the clothes, but with the whole situation was so palpably real.

i love how Qui-Gon's presence was both comforting and pesky. vintage Qui.

Thank you! I?ve had plenty of shopping trips where I just couldn?t find anything right, so I could sympathize with Obi-Wan. Yes, Qui-Gon can be annoying, but it?s just because he wants Obi-Wan to think.

Kestrel_Kenobi: The conversations between Qui and Obi were wonderfully done - a great portrayal of their 'new relationship' and all the ups and downs that go with it. And Qui giving Obi advice about fashion was very funny!

Loved how Obi was wearing a skirt as well!

Thanks for reading! Qui-Gon would likely be training Obi-Wan in all sorts of things, not just about joining the Force, I think. The skirt came about because when Obi-Wan didn?t have any pants...well he needed something to keep the sun off, and just about any big piece of fabric can be wrapped into a skirt.

Magenta_Moonshadow: Satisfied with this reaction from his Master, he experimented with grinning in the mirror and imagined himself crossing the desert in clothes that made himself look like a flag.

This sentence made me laugh!

Glad it made you laugh! Qui-Gon invited him to try something new, and he did.

Healer_Leona: //Black is slimming,// Qui-Gon pointed out. //You could use that.//

LOL, I can't believe he said that. Great to see these two together.

Thanks! Well, Qui-Gon can sometimes give a brutally honest appraisal.

KELIA: Poor Obi-Wan...Forced to go *(shudder* shopping!
.......
How fitting he ended up choosing a robe that would make him look like a Jedi.

Thanks! Yes, the horror! Shopping! But that?s the life of a hermit. I wonder if a Jedi robe isn?t part security blanket. Even with his old life gone, I think he would still gravitate to his old clothes.

ophelia: I think I've been in that store! I get all my stuff from there, too!

OK, you?ve got me there. Obi-Wan was shopping in the Mos Eisley Goodwill. I?ve been in that store many, many times.

VADER: Your powers are weak, old man. And you're wearing a dress. You should try black next time. It's very slimming.

OBI-WAN: Yes, well not everyone can have a body built by Ford, Mr. "Abs of steel."

He he. I suppose technically, that long tunic he had on in ANH was a dress anyway; I often wonder what he wore under it.

AIIIGGH!! *Now* I've got mental images of an AU in which he spends ANH in *that.* The twin suns could only make it worse.

LUKE: Ben? Ben Ke--OH SWEET MOTHER OF MERCY MY EYES!!!

Well, that?s the power of the light side of the Force. I considered a few bright, neon colors, but since everyone on Tatooine seemed to wear desert colors, it didn?t seem likely that one would find flashy colors in a second-hand store. How interesting that so many people on Tatooine dress like Jedi anyway. Obi-Wan walking down the street there would be just like a leaf hiding in a forest.

Very nice distinction, and a fitting (no pun intended) w

 

Oh this was so funny! I love reading the Obi-wan Challenges especially whenever an author addresses life on Tatooine. The stories are usually either very funny or very poignant. This one is both.

It's easy to see Obi-wan's frustrations don't just come from having to buy new clothes or the trouble he has to go through to get new clothes. It's also wonderful to see Qui-Gon still helping his Padawan. This is such a great viggie.

bran

 

That was a perfect blend of humor, sweetness and sadness. It was very Obi-Wan to not think about clothes, although in the story you can tell that he's slightly interested in what he wears. I loved that Qui-Gon was there with him, advising him on what went with his eyes. It was such an unusual, touching moment.

 

How very - real, and that's meant as a compliment! It's very vivid and it echoes the pain I feel now if I watch ANH - what was, what could have been, and what it became. Ben Kenobi so surely was no longer Obi-Wan Kenobi in so many ways, and yet, he was little changed (does that make sense?).

Beautiful job.

 

Aaaaaaah, I've been away and terribly slack with replies and fixing those darn typos....

_ThatJediScum_: Oh this was so funny! I love reading the Obi-wan Challenges especially whenever an author addresses life on Tatooine. The stories are usually either very funny or very poignant. This one is both.

It's easy to see Obi-wan's frustrations don't just come from having to buy new clothes or the trouble he has to go through to get new clothes. It's also wonderful to see Qui-Gon still helping his Padawan. This is such a great viggie.

I've been delving into Obi-Wan's "lost" years on Tatooine. Compared to his previous life, he probably didn't do very much there....unless you want to count communing Qui-Gon.

And it was terribly fun writing a shopping trip for a guy who has hardly ever had to shop for clothes in his whole life. Having Qui-Gon as a 'back-seat' shopper made it more fun. Thanks for reading!

LuvEwan: That was a perfect blend of humor, sweetness and sadness. It was very Obi-Wan to not think about clothes, although in the story you can tell that he's slightly interested in what he wears. I loved that Qui-Gon was there with him, advising him on what went with his eyes. It was such an unusual, touching moment.

Thanks much! The Obi-Wan we see in ANH has had nearly 20 years to adjust to being a lone Jedi with nearly everybody he knew and loved massacred. I always got the impression that Obi-Wan was more particular about his appearance than Qui-Gon. I think because his tunics were neater, cleaner and crisper than Qui-Gon's in TPM.

I enjoyed putting Qui-Gon in for 'fashion appraisal' to shock Obi-Wan out of his mood. But I think his real purpose was to nudge Obi-Wan away from the humiliating depression of having to scrounge for clothes...and that this was the highlight of day, too.

Valairy_Scot: How very - real, and that's meant as a compliment! It's very vivid and it echoes the pain I feel now if I watch ANH - what was, what could have been, and what it became. Ben Kenobi so surely was no longer Obi-Wan Kenobi in so many ways, and yet, he was little changed (does that make sense?).

Yes, it makes sense. Thanks for the reply!

Those little bits where you can see Ben thinking about the past in ANH were always heartfelt, but they mean so much more now that we have the final piece in the story with ROTS.

 

Gods, I kept laughing out loud - and then I felt like crying, for all the things Obi-Wan lost. At least Qui-Gon is there, commenting on slimming black outfits and looking appalled (oh, that was a wonderful line!) ... and he eventually chooses robes that are closest to Jedi. Poignantly written, Anne.

 

How did I miss this one?

This was beautiful.

Very well done. I can picture the scene in my head. Thanks for that.

 

Princess_Arulmozhi: Aaaaaah, yes, black clothes are slimming. But that still wouldn't be enough to get Obi-Wan to wear them. He may have lost the Jedi, just he'll still dress as a Jedi. Thanks for the reply!

hyperspace_police: Thanks very much!