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|| The Fall of the Jedi || One Post Vignette- Dedicated to Cynical21

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by CalaisKenobi, Jul 26, 2002.

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  1. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 15, 2002
    Dedicated to Cynical21 who inspired the idea :)

    Disclaimer: GL owns everything you see, and a lot of things you don't ;)

    *********************************************



    ?I will not do this. I am not going to run and hide and allow Vader to destroy everything we have worked so hard to protect!? Obi-Wan shouted as he paced frenetically across the bridge of the small starship.

    ?Run and hide you are not. Securing the future you are,? the only other figure on the bridge answered. Although only five occupied the vessel built for fifteen, the raging emotions made the space seem claustrophobic.

    Stopping his pacing immediately in front of the diminutive green Master, Obi-Wan Kenobi dropped to his knees. ?Master Yoda, you can secure the future. I can make sure that the boy is brought to you when he is old enough. I would only be a danger to him. Please, allow me to return to the Temple. I know Anakin?s fighting style, I stand a better chance against him than anyone else!?

    Taking in the pleading tones of the distressed Knight, Yoda could do nothing but sigh. ?Defiant you always were, but defy me in this you WILL NOT.? The last two words were punctuated by Yoda?s gimmer stick on the plasteel flooring.

    Dropping his head in momentary defeat, Obi-Wan found his mind returning to the horrific scene they had just left. The Temple had been under siege, Imperial Storm Troopers swarming over the entire campus. Obi-Wan had been in the crèche, trying to evacuate the smallest and most innocent of the Jedi when Master Yoda had found him.

    ?Come with me, you must.? Although the Head Councilor carried his gimmer stick, he was not using it for balance or support. Instead, the Master moved with an alacrity Obi-Wan had only seen once before in his life, when Yoda had taken on his former Padawan in a deadly ?saber duel.

    ?We need to get these children out of here. The Storm Troopers will show them no mercy, regardless of their age,? Obi-Wan answered, as he bent down to scoop up a child that couldn?t have been over a year in age.

    ?Time for this there is not. The crèche Masters will handle them,? Yoda responded, with only the slightest Force persuasion. Handing the child off to a nearby Padawan, Obi-Wan hurried to follow Master Yoda. For Yoda to violate such an inherent tenant of the Jedi Code, it had to be important. Using the Force on another Jedi was almost as forbidden as drawing a lightsaber on a fellow Knight.

    As the younger Master followed Yoda through what had once been serene and beautiful halls, Obi-Wan took in the battle damage and the rising chaos. What had once been the most peaceful building on Coruscant was now the epicenter of a war that was being fought at a terrible cost.

    ?Master Yoda, where are we going? Has Vader made it in system already?? The Jedi had managed to keep track of their ?fallen? brethren, even as Vader had made sure to monitor several of his former colleagues.

    ?No, appeared Vader has not. Protect another we must,? Yoda answered in his usual cryptic manner, picking up the pace until the young Knight almost had to jog to keep up. ?Of utmost importance this is. Clear your mind of anything else, focus only on this mission.?

    Before Obi-Wan could formulate a response, they arrived at what had formerly been the East Meditation Gardens. The gardens had been destroyed in one of the first attacks on the Temple and had since become an impromptu landing field. Sitting in the middle of the blackened field, where once Obi-Wan and his Master Qui-Gon had meditated peacefully, was a small Republic Transport.

    Reaching out to the Force, Obi-Wan immediately scanned the vessel and the occupants inside. Almost before he could complete the scan, he had his lightsaber in hand and was preparing to charge the small ship. As he took the first Force-enhanced step, a gnarled green claw reached out to grab his leggings, almost causing him to trip.

    ?Judge in haste you should not Obi-Wan,? Yoda said sagely, as the Knight turned to him incredulously. ?I am not j
     
  2. TheFallen

    TheFallen Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 27, 2001
    An excellent take on the fall of the Temple. I like the part with him not respecting Padme as much anymore since she seduced Anakin and didn't tell him anything.

    Another great CK story! :D
     
  3. obaona

    obaona Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 18, 2002
    :eek: THIS IS SO GOOD!
     
  4. Master_Comedy_Kitty

    Master_Comedy_Kitty Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 5, 2002
    Amazing. Simply wonderful I loved it. Kudos...
     
  5. PadawanKitara

    PadawanKitara Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 31, 2001
    Wow CK very well done-let's hope this thread doesn't host another intergalactic battle ;)
     
  6. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 15, 2002
    Nope, no WWIV's here (since Cyn already hosted WWIII) :D
     
  7. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 15, 2002
  8. Jedi_Alman

    Jedi_Alman Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 9, 2002
    Very nice work. I enjoyed it immensely.
     
  9. Larkonna

    Larkonna Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Mar 20, 1999
    Curious, I came, stunned I leave.

    CK That was brilliant as usual, but I especially liked the way you went from the extermination of the Jedi to the new hope. The barren feeling of the loss of Jedi was powerful even in those few sentences. The words really carried the feeling of sorrow, pain, and depression. Very sad. But very, very good.
     
  10. Aunecah_Skywalker

    Aunecah_Skywalker Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Mar 25, 2002
    A very nice job. I especially like the part where Obi-Wan struggles to deal with what he thinks is right and what is actually right.

    [hl=blue] Aunecah_Skywalker [/hl]
     
  11. Enigma_Jade

    Enigma_Jade Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Sep 4, 2001
    Awesome, Calais! Poor Obi! I hope there is a scene very much like this in Ep3. . .It would make the movie even more amazing than I'm hoping it will be! (Hey, it's the fall of Ani. . .what's better? 8-})

    Great job! Pity it's only a 1-shot!

    EJ
     
  12. Knight-Ander

    Knight-Ander Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 19, 2002
    THWACK [face_laugh]

    Now Obi knows how Artoo feels.
     
  13. Indigo_Jade

    Indigo_Jade Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 23, 2002
    Very good... I liked it alot!!!! :)

    Indy
     
  14. anakin_girl

    anakin_girl Jedi Knight star 6

    Registered:
    Oct 8, 2000
    Geez, are we still talking about that little episode of Internet Drama on CYN's thread?

    Anyway, good vignette, CK. What a messy situation our heroes are in.

    What I'm interested in seeing in Episode III, is how and why Ani gets to the point of hating the Jedi and wanting them destroyed. :( I'm going to cry the whole time I watch it, but I do want to see that.
     
  15. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 15, 2002
    Thanks for all the comments everyone! :D
     
  16. Leah-Beth

    Leah-Beth Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 6, 2002
    Amazing viggie!!
     
  17. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 15, 2002
    Thanks Leah-Beth! :)

    Anakin_girl What I'm interested in seeing in Episode III, is how and why Ani gets to the point of hating the Jedi and wanting them destroyed. I'm going to cry the whole time I watch it, but I do want to see that. Do I see vignette in your future? 8-} The idea does intrigue me as well. I wonder if it isn't that something happens and suddenly he decides he hates the Jedi, but rather it is a hate that has been blossoming ever since Yoda and the rest of the Council refused him?
     
  18. anakin_girl

    anakin_girl Jedi Knight star 6

    Registered:
    Oct 8, 2000
    CK: Good question. I think there has been some hatred there ever since Yoda and the Council refused him--I'm thinking of Jake Lloyd's evil-eyed look in TPM, almost like you could see Vader blossoming right there--but I think maybe he's buried it in his subconscious over the years during his training with Obi-Wan, and come to respect the Jedi if not to love them--at least some of them. Then Palpatine's influence, or should I say manipulation, causes the old feelings to resurface. It should be interesting to see.

    A vignette? I'd love to write one, actually, if I could get rid of my current episode of writer's block. :p
     
  19. CYNICAL21

    CYNICAL21 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 8, 2001
    Oh, very, very well done, CK - and I'm truly honored that you chose to dedicate it to me. You have a lovely style, and great in-depth emotional analysis.

    If and when I ever get a little bit of time (and since I'm getting close to the end of AUF, maybe that'll be soon} I plan to dig into your other work.

    In the meantime, a series of vignettes sounds lovely, don't you think?

    CYN
     
  20. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 15, 2002
    Thanks Cyn! You inspired the idea with your debate on "Black Genesis." I actually have an idea for another vignette, which works to answer Anakin-girl's question, but I promised to hold it until Aug. 3. ( TheFallen's birthday).
    :) Until then, I'll just keep up with the monster POS has become ;)

    BTW: AUF, almost finished??! [face_shocked] But...but... I don't want it to end! :_|
     
  21. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 15, 2002
    Going up! :D
     
  22. Healer_Leona

    Healer_Leona Squirrely Community Mod star 9 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jul 7, 2000
    Wow Calais, impressive... most impressive.
     
  23. CYNICAL21

    CYNICAL21 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 8, 2001
    CK - Just so you know - the last chapter is posted. Only the epilog remains before I write FINIS to it. After 430,000+ words, I think it's time - don't you? But I appreciate the fact that you enjoyed it.

    There'll be another soon enough, whether or not it's posted here.

    I'll let you know - and, in the meantime, keep up the good work.

    CYN
     
  24. Rani Veko

    Rani Veko Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 22, 2000
    This was a great vignette, many kudos for a job well done! I think you captured Obi-Wan's torn loyalties, his frustration with Yoda, and his shock at Yoda's revelation very, very well. I could easily visualize Obi-Wan's look of determination when he reopened his eyes.

    Thank you for writing this!

    - Rani
     
  25. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 15, 2002
    Thank you Healer_Leona! :)


    Cyn There'll be another soon enough, whether or not it's posted here.
    I'll let you know
    Whoo hoo!!! :D I so enjoy reading your fics, and now that FF.N finally let me register, I can comment to 8-}


    Rani Thanks so much for reading and reviewing this! I wasn't sure if I could pull it off, so I am glad you liked it ;)

    CK
     
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