The Great Barnacles present: A SPECIAL Christmas YJCC Update! Get Out Of The SNOW, See The SHOW!

Messrs. JULES and NOEL BARNACLE, along with their American cousin BLIND LEROY and the lovely LADY ALICE, invite the GENERAL PUBLIC to WITNESS one of the most SPECTACULAR circus acts in this forum!


~*~ Death-Defying Marvels Of Pulse-Thomping Actuality! ~*~

Father-Christmas made an appearance at the JC. In between visits to the Willowbrook School For Retarded Children and the "Make A Wish" Foundation For The Terminally Sick, the old goat handed out presents and recruited red-cheeked reindorks. A fun time was had by all, except by a few trolls, who felt threatened by old Santa's ever-present gnome mafia.

Excitement over Saddam Hussein's capture led to several threads, unfortunately using up all exclamation marks for the week. With Hussein in custody, he is bound to find the JC sooner or later, like so many locked-up, isolated cave dwellers before him. Rumour has it that the former dictator already registered some time ago under the name of homeless_jedi.

A case of American anti-gayism was brought to the YJCC's attention by AdamBertocci. Predictably, his thread got locked. (A note from that other JC Council, the Jesus Christ Council: "Don't bring religion into this."). We asked site owner Josh Griffin for his comments:

Agh ******* ****!

When are those [Mod edit: that word is not allowed] going to [Mod edit: you have to asterisk out the whole word] understand that [You know better] gay fan fiction or anything [Unnecessary] gay-related is not [You can't say that here] going to happen [Not appropriate] on this [No] site!

****!

**** the *************! unbe*******lievable!

Josh Griffin, staff T*N

[Mod edit: see you in 4 years]


~*~ In Other Fantasticular Roller-Coaster News! ~*~

- Panic broke out at the Blue Yoda Society when it was discovered its founding member had been watching the films on a distorted television set all the time.

- In sign language, the gesture for "manure" turned out to be the same as the one for "Jedi Council Community."

- Darth_Dagsy was attacked by several children mistaking him for a Christmas sugar cane. His perplexed comment: "I'm used to women and little dogs attacking me, but children, that's new to me."

- The following Line-By-Line threads will be allowed: Metropolis, Nosferatu, The Battleship Potemkin, Birth of a Nation, and Cabinet of Dr. Caligari, and selected Charlie Chaplin films.

- Many people took to smoking pot after clicking on the marijuana banner. No change was noticeable at the YJCC afterwards.

- Gandolf The Grey had his name changed, so that it now no longer reflects the alternate universe of Lard of the Rungs. King of Pop Michael Jackson warned Gandolf that once you start correcting, it's hard to stop; we're waiting now for Gandolf The White, Formerly Black to show up.

- Current score for the ongoing LOTR vs. SW debate: 9999-1138. As for the Prequel Trilogy defenders: "Always two, there are. No more, no less."

- A girl named kicky registered to announce she liked masturbating to Return of the Jedi. After the thread was locked, a guy named ducky registered and jumped to kicky's defense. Then the cardboard puppet theatre fell over, revealing old troll YodaOfTheSith, socks on both hands, lobotomy scar on head, caught doing a high-pitched girl's voice. Either the building YodaOfTheSith lives in harbors a lot of dubious characters, or the guy created so many socks he suffers from an identity crisis. We'll keep you updated.

~*~ A Fresh-From-The-Press Pearl Of Precious Pranksterism! ~*~

In an attempt to enforce stability at the YJCC, mods have put a ban on a number of flame-war-provoking topics. In short, they are the war(s), Iraq, France, the US, Canada, Australia, George Bush, Osama bin Laden, Saddam Hussein, Jacques Chirac, missiles, weapons, Michael Moore, bearded men, George Washington, Eiffel, Jesus, Mary, re

 

*applauds*
Nice.
*begins playing the JC Drinking Game *

 

Great update!

 

Brilliance!

Now I've got to get back to PMing mods.

-sj loves kevin spacey

 

Nice stuff!

 

I got dem YJCC blues, people be whinin' all the time
Ohhhh I got dem YJCC blues, these lonely people cryin' all the time
I've had enough of their complainin', give me my guitar and my wine

Great update, thanks!

 

Back with a vengeance!

 

The Drinking Game made me giggle like a school girl.

Amazing.

 

Brilliant! The best yet!

 

I see you've all been very busy, but can you please tell me why my generic complaint of 2 weeks ago hasn't yet been addressed?

 

j. Saint Of Killers posts in Comms.
k. DarthAttorney posts in Comms.
l. The thread in which they posted gets closed

Great stuff!

And hey, I got a mention for my little thread.



Rick McCallum loves you!

 

jp: That issue has gotten wildly out of context. As with everything, it has to be looked at on a case-by-case basis. You may, however, want to PM someone in order to get a full explanation. May I suggest cousin Leroy?


We feel very honored to stand before this august gathering! Thank you! Thank you kindly!

 

Funny stuff!

 

With all due respect Julesie, can I please have an answer from a senior Barnacle, one that didn't register this month.

 

jp: There's still discussion on this, and hopefully some answers from Fred or Max will be forthcoming in the near future. C'est tout.

 

The senior Barnacles are on vacation, I got dem no senior Barnacle blues
Ohhh the senior Barnacles are on vacation, I got dem low down no senior Barnacle blues
Oh won't you bring back Fred and Max now, they'll always be our favorites to abuse

This update is the cat's pajamas. Dig?

 

I can not believe that. Come up with a better story, or you'll be living on the bottom of a glass bottom boat.

 

That was cute.

 

Ahah. Marry Christmas Barnacle brothers.

 

Thank you, mademoiselles! Thank you and merci!

 

Marry Christmas Barnacle brothers.

And then have lots of children!

Amazing.

 

This thread is a parody of this thread, this thread, and this thread.

I'll have to lock it now, I hope you understand.

And I'm sorry for leaving it so long to lock. I'll be sure to sleep less in the future so as to be more efficient. Until I start imagining I'm a hummingbird. Then I'm hitting the sack.

 

Oh look! Christmas sugar cane!

 

New Barnacles? ?

 

less cliches, more guttenberg.