Before - Legends The Green Stone Trilogy I: Making -young Qui's journal-Aaaand this is just never going to end.

AMIRI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! O.O

SARAH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *sobs* Aww, sith!!!!!! That's so sad!!! *weeps* Amiri was my favorite female OC, I think *sniffles* oh, that's so sad!!! But still, awesome writing, see, is best fic ever!! Can't wait to see what happens next, you're doing a great job, and you write little Qui's head so well, and just, so Qui-ish! Nice job, dark, like you said, but beautifully done, my friend.

 

Whoa, Sarah that was really dark. I liked how you told the story of the Younglings and how Qui lied to the diary. Somehow that made it even sadder.

Hope you will stay not dead! Looking forward to more.

 

Kynstar: Thank you.

Layren: Thanks. And the bad feeling is right. BTW where are you? I've emailed you and all...

Jurious: Thanks for both the reviews. (Mapru actually reminds me of Snape, weirdly enough)

Jess: I wouldn't go as far as best fic ever, but thank you. And she was my favourite too...

Diane: The lying was my favourite bit..er...in a twisted way. Thanks!

EDIT:A few typos corrected, thanks to MistiWhiteSun

Making
63. Things Will Go All Twisted

6th day, 10th month, standard year 24939

I keep wondering if maybe keeping a journal is not so good for me. I don't know why. I'm not even particularly good at it.

What is normal, journal? So many times I've wanted to write 'Things were back to normal' here or elsewhere, and I can't. Is there just some point in your life when things stop being normal and they never return to exactly how they were? Is that how you grow up? And if so, it's a very cruel system.

*****

7th day, 3rd month, standard year 24939

May as well make note of this. We're goin to Tatooine. Eight of us. Me, my Master, Tahl, Master Thea, Vulna, Master Kiloxan, Nela and Master Meesha.

Attempted genocide of Tusken Raiders. Tricky situation. You know these things by now.

*****

9th day, 3rd month, standard year 24939

Have talked to two people. A girl called Ruth, and her grandfather. They are the only people left in their family, the Tuskens killed the rest.

There's been hostility between the farmers here and the Tuskens since...the beginning of time, or so it seems. And now there are far less tribes than there were.

I know what they do. They've tortured people before. And they hate humans more than ever now. Ruth and her grandfather are in danger from them now, and it's not even through any fault of their own. I don't really know what's right in this situation.

An update of sorts on Vulna: he and Kiloxan barely speak to each other. I've never really seen them talking properly before.

-----

Another update of sorts on Vulna: I just saw him talking to a girl.

I don't know who she is or anything. They were just in the marketplace, and I was...well, killing time I suppose, we can't do anything til tonight...and they were standing close to each other and talking.

Who is she? Did he just meet her today? I suppose he must have done.

I have to go now.

*****

8th day, 3rd month, standard year 24939

Vulna won't say much about the girl. He says she's nobody important. To the mission, that is.

I don't exactly trust Vulna, but...well, never mind. I don't feel much like writing. I have work to do.

*****

9th day, 3rd month, standard year 24939

Ruth told me something.
She said that before, she'd seen two other Jedi. I wasn't surprised...you see a lot of Jedi on Tatooine, after all...but then she described them to me (Well, we didn't have much else to talk about). I'm not completely convinced, but I think it was Ololian and Mapru she was describing.

She mentioned that she saw them kissing.

This sounds slightly ridicous, like we're kids exchanging rumors. But...

It's probably not even important.

Oh, and I asked her about the girl I saw Vulna with. I tried to remember what she looked like...green eyes, light brown hair...
Ruth doesn't know her. Well, no-one can know everyone, after all.

I'm not even sure why I want to know. It's just...Vulna...he's always been...difficult.

******

Oh, and we didn't really get anywhere. Ruth and her grandfather are alive, although not necessarily happy, and negotiations with the Hutts about protecting the Tuskens pretty much failed, and my Master's heart wasn't in it. He didn't really think we were fighting for anything...I see his point, why should you care whether a group of people who kill and torture as they like live or die?...but you can't fight for something all the time.

I sort of wish w

 

Awww yay you LIVE!!!

And such nice LONG chapters too that was most excellent -- poor kid I could feel his fear and confusion.

Where have I been? I have a laptop with messenger that works now!

I had to get a new one So I'll be on more often.

and I've also been buried under excerpts and nominations for the awards I'm hosting the Saga forum stuff

Great post!

 

Wow that last lil bit was kind'a scary! Poor Qui how sad!

Hmmm Vulna up to no good again? And what kissing Jedi? hehehe

Great job!!! Glad to see you are still about! Thanks also for the long chappie!

 

(excuse my online loudness, but...)

LAAAAAAYYYYYYRRRREEEEENNNN! You're heeeeeeeerrrrrreeee!

 

[grimace] Whoa?

You might remember me from FF.net.

Good chapter!

Keep writing!

 

Oh heck! Poor Quiggs isn't having a good time, is he? and that bit near the end was well creepy... Poor, poor Qui... I think his awareness of everything shows his development as a person, too, coz let's face it, he's growing up all the time. Bless.

Nice work, Sarah!

 

Wow, all caught up again! Great job!!

 

And it looks like this is the first post of the new year.

Thanks to each and every one of you who posted.

Making
64. The Forgotten

21st day, 4th month, standard year 24939

Told Tahl.

*****

I can't really elaborate on that.

*****

22st day, 4th month, standard year 24939

Me and my Master have been selected for a mission.

I wish I could speak more about the missions. The people we've met. That girl with the bracelet.....the bracelet around her severed arm was all they ever found of her. The boy who killed the people who'd killed his family, right in front of me and I couldn't stop him...he'd tied me up. The prince who I was insanely jealous of for a very silly reason.

I'd like to write about these things. But it's...never the time. They're over now. Victims have become statistics and people have become nameless. I could list them all, in here, to make sure they're never forgotten. Is that the greatest gift a human being can give another, the gift of never being forgotten?

Perhaps Master would say so. Perhaps Yoda would say so. I don't know.

I'd miss someone out. I wouldn't get far, talking about everyone. There was Alixen...I remember her so well, and I don't know why....and there was Alex, and...their sister, and....Shadow, and Li and Li-Bird, and...and Lieson and....oh galaxies, all that business, and now there's Ruth and....

It'll work one day. But not now.

*****

1st year, 1st month, standard year 24940

Happy new year.

Things aren't bad, you know. Things are just not bad. You have to make a choice, don't you? To become a Jedi. And a Jedi's entire life is one of choice. Do I behave selfishly or selflessly? Do I save myself or do I save them? And the harder choices, too. Her or him. Her or them. Them or them. I'm on the outside, and I'll always have to choose.

And I chose this.

And I'm there. I'm connected. It works. The galaxy works. It should. It ought to. There are good people, and there's bad people, but there's more good. And if we stop belieing in the good...

Well, I imagine people are, and they stop believing every day.

******

5th day, 2nd month, standard year 24940

More people to add to the list. More people who'll just get forgotten.

*****

24th day, 2nd month, standard year 24940

There was a song on the holowave just now. It's leaving me already, but it sounded...meaningful. I don't know who sang it, though., It might be a droid singing it, for all I know. They do that a lot now, more than they used to.

*****

20th day, 3rd month, standard year 24940

Today I was one of a group of Jedi selected to go testing children for Jedi potential. It's...

...well, people spit at us, sometimes, when they see us coming. Only sometimes. Others are polite. But I know that they all wish we'd go away. No-one wants to have their children taken away. Hardly anyone.

There was one child I remember. Black hair. Blue eyes. I took the midichlorian count for him. I remember his father...he was rich and powerful, he'd have easily been able to provide for his son....giving him up, saying he couldn't give him what I could...

I don't want to do it again. Not really. These people make an agonizing choice to trust you. You might not be worthy of their trust. You might make a mistake.

Who knows what my parents thought, when they handed me over?

******

5th day, 3rd month, standard year 24940

You don't get nearly as many presents, as you get older.

That's not a complaint, just an observation.

*****

5th day, expansion week, standard year 24940

I feel sick.

Tahl keeps trying to keep an eye on me, or whatever she calls it. She...I think she hates feeling powerless. She was so worried when I mentioned I felt sick.

Not really the behaviour of a Jedi, is it?

It's a good thing I didn't tell her about the dreams, then.

*****

1st day, 4th month, standard year 24940

 

What a cliffhanger to come back with Sarah Now i'm burning with curiosity wondering what it was

 

Ahh poor Qui contemplating over statistics and folks... yep people come and people go... only to be forgotten. It is a sad fact of life.

Hehehe black hair blue eye kid with a rich pop? Well wonder who that could have been? *snrk* hehehe

Definitely an evil cliffy! hehehehe glad to see ya back!

 

Thanks for your patience, everyone.

Making
65. Isn't Life Supposed To Just Go On?

5th day, 4th month, standard year 24940

I was writing about my parents only a few months ago. Now I have to write about them again. And I don't want to. I've put this off for almost an entire hour. I wrote 'I was' then went away for almost an hour, then came back and wrote the rest.

Anyone who knows me who's reading this -not that anyone is- would be really suprised. They think I'm dealing with all this so well. In fact, they probably think I don't care at all. I do. How could I not care?

My parents are dead. They died just a few days ago in an earthquake, worst one to hit the planet Toci for ages and ages and ages. My brother is still alive. I'm still alive. It's not fair. Everyone is treating me just the same as they always have, and I hate it, but I'd also hate it if they were treating me differently.

I want to think. Meditate. Pray. But I just don't feel like doing anything.

*****

8th day, 4th month, standard year 24940

I recieved a letter from my brother. It was rather short, like he'd writtten it to a stranger. Which I suppose he had. It just said that he was fine, that a funeral had taken place, that he was leaving Toci to become a pilot.

They never let me write to him. I wish I'd known him. I suppose I knew him a little, but...

But my family is here. And yet he's family too. And so were my parents and they're dead, and of course they would have died eventually, but, but....

I've been sitting here with this journal in my lap for over two hours. Master has left to do other things...start an argument with someone, perhaps.

There wasn't anything I could have done.

*****

11th day, 4th month, standard year 24940

Tahl came round.

"You..you've been missing all your lessons," she said in a nervous voice. "Maybe it's time you..."

"I'd rather just stay here," I said, cutting her off. "Just for a while longer."

"But you're falling behind..." she said. She was standing in the doorway, not sitting down. "Master Mapru said I ought to..."

"Oh, he did, did he? Well, in that case, I HAVE to do it, don't I? And not make a mistake, mention any touchy subjects or even look at the bastard, right?"

"Stop it," she said quietly. "I know you're upset."

"Well done. I am upset."

"Look..." she said. "You've just locked yourself away in your own little world..."

I said nothing.

"You've cut yourself off from everyone, you're making us feel as bad as you do...you think your parents would like you acting like this?"

I jumped up then, and she immediately stepped back, worried, knowing she'd done something wrong.

"Tahl," I screamed. "JUST SHUT UP!"

My words echoed around the room, which had never felt so empty...and then she ran away.

She was supposed to start yelling back. I expected her to. I hate that she didn't. I hate it.

*****

30th day, 5th month, standard year 24940

I'm about to leave on a mission and Tahl didn't say goodbye to me.

*****

32nd day, 5th month, standard year 24940

No-one reads this, do they? Qui-Gon didn't take it with him, and now it's just on the desk looking lonely.

It's me, Tahl. I wouldn't have the patience to write in a diary every day, like my best friend seems to have done. I feel like a complete idiot for saying what I said to him. It was insensitive. And...

...and this really isn't helping.

He's not dead, by the way. He's just been captured. They're working to free him. But nothing has happened yet.

He kissed me once.

******

33rd day, 5th month, standard year 24940

Qui-Gon's Master was looking at this a few minutes ago. Then he put it down again.

My best friend still hasn't been rescued. All I can do is ope.

If you ever read this, Qui, just for the record: I love you.

*****

 

How old is Qui-Gon in this? I lost track. Poor Qui-Gon, does he need a hug? I love this chapter, I hope you update soon!

 

LilQui-Gon- *does quick calculations* He's aaaabout...twenty-one.

Making
66. Alex

18th day, 4th month, standard year 24941

Been a while, hasn't it?

Been a very long while.

I wish this journal made more sense. I wish I wrote in it more often. I wish it wasn't full of disconected ramblings and things that make no sense and people who show up and then leave. But that's life- everyone's life, not just a Jedi's. People come into your life and then just go away again. Things happen that have no point.

And maybe you want to know what happened.

Has it ever occured to you that I might be lying?

*****

I'm not lying, though. You probably don't remember Alex. I didn't remember Alex. Or Alixen, his sisiter, that girl who...got shot. Or his little sister, who I found on a planet destroyed by an earthquake...heh, an earthquake. Funny. I should feel like that almost redeemed my parent's deaths, but no, it hasn't.

Anyway, I was captured. You know that much. If you saw Tahl's entry...and I've read it thousands and thousands of times now, until I know every word as solidly as I know my own name. (And you know what? I haven't even properly reacted to it yet). The jail cell I was flung in wasn't bad. At least not compared to some of the other times I've been captured, one of which stands out on my memory more than almost anything does these days.

Alex was a guard there, and of course I didn't recognize him at first. It's not like he always remained a memory and nothing more, after all. He didn't treat me badly, but I saw him kicking people- joining in with the other guards and their 'fun'. I tried to intervene, and I think I was knocked unconcious by one of them. He was a big guy. Probably their leader. I think he left me alone because he was instructed to, because I was a Jedi, but I don't know why they wanted me to not be hurt in the first place. I suppose that I never will.

I'll never know where Alex got my name from, either. His commanding officer or the other guards or something, I assume- they'd have had to know who it was they were holding, I guess.

He came to bring me food and water one day.

"I think I recognize you from somewhere," he said, watching me through the bars. "I recognize your eyes, or something." I expected him to follow this up with you Jedi filth, or something along those lines, and was suprised when he didn't.

"What's your name?" I asked cautiously.

"Alex Risus."

I recognized the name then, and began to wonder.

"And you're Qui-Gon Jinn," he went on, "and you were there when my sister was shot."

"I...I was, yes. I remember you."

He scowled. "Well...you know what? You didn't have anything to do with it, so I'm not going to hit you for it or anything. Or kill you for it, or whatever."

"Oh..."

"Well, I suppose that's all we have to say to each other." He left before I could say anything else.

*****

19th day, 4th month, standard year 24941

Well, of course there's more to that story.

I didn't see Alex again for a few days, and I figured he'd gone for good. I had an interesting dream one night before seeing him the first and time and seeing him the second time. It was two men, and they kept aruging, and I couldn't hear what they were saying- their mouths moved and I knew they were speaking, like how in dreams you know things that you don't know in reality, but no words were coming out.

It wasn't exactly a scary dream, but it didn't give me much comfort. Day four of captivity...or it could have been day five...Alex showed up again. He brought me food. There must have been a rota for who brought the food, I think. Other times it was different guards.

"I reckon you had a crush on my sister," he said, before he said anything else. He was smoking a death stick, and seemed to be in a pretty foul mood.

"No. I just liked her," I said.

"You might have been able to save her, though," he went on. "Maybe I should do you some damage, afte

 

Poor Qui still having things he is tring to work out. Poor kid.

Awww he memorized what Tahl wrote in the journal! How sweet is that?

Thanks for the update!!

 

*nervous*

I've pretty much left the fanfic boards, as is probably obvious...so it looks like I'm not updating here anymore. But <A HREF="http://www.heartstars.net/sw/making.html">I am still updating it at my own site</A>, and it's still on ff.net (my username there is Sarah the PokePrincess).

Anyway, thanks, everyone. Seriously. I'd have completely given up on this thing if it weren't for all of you.

 

WOW. I've been lurking on here for a looooong time before I rejoined these boards, and I have to say that this is one of my favorite fanfics ever!! Keep it coming!!