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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Story [The Hobbit, LOTR]: A Hobbit in Ered Luin Dear Diary 2014

Discussion in 'Non Star Wars Fan Fiction' started by Space_Wolf, Jan 2, 2014.

  1. Mira_Jade

    Mira_Jade The (FavoriteTM) Fanfic Mod With the Cape star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jun 29, 2004
    Ack, I am so sorry to hear about your dog! I can imagine few things worse. :( I am glad to hear that all is well, though. :)

    Whenever you decide it best to post, we will be there to enjoy. [:D]
     
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  2. Space_Wolf

    Space_Wolf Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2007
    I am thinking of doing some short stories next year based on my twitter rp characters because I find the characters quite fascinating. It will depend on if I can get another computer or not because I only really have time to do this story. It will be AU to the Hilda and Kili romance, though, and I will have to come up with new names for the rp characters so that they aren't confused with the ones in the Hilda and Kili story. I just think that the characters I've created deserve a proper story where the storylines and such aren't ruined because other people don't play ball, so to speak.
     
  3. Space_Wolf

    Space_Wolf Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2007

    The final stretch... of course... I am surprised that I've managed to keep this story going this long, considering all the problems I had in the summer. I am more behind in it than I want to be, but I'm pleased to have got this far with it and hope to conclude it sometime next year!
    ---------------------------------------------------

    Kili's Journal

    28th Rethe

    This just sucks. Uncle Thorin is in council with Gandalf, Dwalin, and the human woman Ristil Fili has been allowed in on it, mainly because there isn't a lot for him to do - in addition to the work in the stables, Uncle Thorin decided that we deserved grounding, like some children. Well, I suppose in some ways, we still are. It wouldn't been so bad if I'd been allowed in on the discussion, but I'm not and I am really curious about what they are talking about. Instead, I have to help Gloin with his accounting. Extremely dull. If it wasn't for the fact that I was still hurting from the beating I took, I would have preferred a day in the stables again. Looking after those ponies is great!

    I know that doing calculations is important - Mam has to do them all the time when she's working in the forge and when she cooks if she has the time to do so, which is rarely because she prefers working in the forge than being a domestic. It is a good thing that we have Bombur and his ladies back in Ered Luin otherwise Fili, Uncle Thorin and I would never eat anything at all. She's not a bad mother, though. She is always there when we need advice and when we are ill, but you just can't expect a woman of her standing to be overly concerned with menial tasks. People look upon her as our Queen, more than a princess, and in many respects, that is what she is.

    There are many who think that Bild and my Uncle should get together. It is obvious that they have a secret love for each other, and it is no one's fault that Uncle Frerin passed. My Uncle deserves happiness after all the bad things that has occurred in his life time, and Fili and I would be freed up to just be ourselves, but the latter is a selfish wish which I shouldn't feel.

    "Are you paying attention, lad?" Gloin huffed gruffly and I could tell that he was in a grumpy mood. My mind had wandered, thinking of other things.

    "I'm sorry, Mr Gloin. I'm just not cut out to be an accountant," I replied. "I just don't have the discipline for it, I'm afraid to admit."

    "That much is obvious. Gimli's the same - he would much rather be out practicing with my axe than sat at a desk. I don't know what is wrong with your generation. Ori and Lofnheid seem to be the only two interested in this sort of work, and that is slim at best. They would much rather be drawing things, inventing stuff or playing around with words. There is no discipline at all in folks close to your age. I despair!"

    "I just prefer caring for the ponies, or being out with my bow," I admitted.

    "Aye, and mooning around with that hobbit lass ye rescued. Look, if you go fetch her, you two can play that Hnefetafl game you're obsessed with, as long as you keep the noise to a minimum and don't disturb my concentration while I do this. I won't tell your Uncle that you've gone against his wishes."

    I was quite surprised to be honest, but I welcomed it. I went off to fetch Hilda and I found her in her room, reading those books the druid had given her. She seemed to be enjoying what she was doing so I left her to it. Unfortunately, Uncle Thorin spotted me when he had emerged from Gandalif's room to order some ales. He wasn't happy seeing me not being where I should have been. He scalded me and I retreated back to the room where Gloin was working. I told him what had happened.

    "I'm sorry, lad. It was my fault, not yours," he gave me a notebook with music score paper. "You do like composing for your fiddle, don't you?"

    "I have been attempting it. Did Mam tell you?"

    "She might have mentioned it a few times when I was talking to her about problems with Gimli. If it helps, having a knowledge of mathematics is useful with composition. You just need to find a way of applying it that suits you."

    I didn't know that, but having it put that way to me, some how, accounting didn't seem that bad anymore.
     
  4. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Gloin is an understanding and accommodating one to work with. Not as prickly as Thorin can be. :p
     
  5. Space_Wolf

    Space_Wolf Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2007
    I am glad to have got Gloin in it, actually. It is difficult sometimes to give everyone a scene when there are so many characters to work with and it is also easy to forget characters too. I often wonder how authors like George Martin do keep up with things when they have to tell the tale of so many people.
     
  6. Mira_Jade

    Mira_Jade The (FavoriteTM) Fanfic Mod With the Cape star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jun 29, 2004
    I liked the glimpse of Gloin here! And the small inclusion of Gimli in mention really had me smiling as well! I'm glad that his 'sensible' solution for Kili's lack of accounting skills worked out for he and Hilda. :p [face_mischief]
     
  7. Space_Wolf

    Space_Wolf Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2007

    The last entry for the diary this year. It has been fun to write and my only regret with this is that I've not got as far into the story as I would have liked to have got, at least with posting wise, but because of me not being well during the summer, there wasn't a great deal I could do about that. Hopefully, I'll get the next entry up in the New Year.
    --------------------------------------

    Hilda Greenhill's Diary

    28th Rethe

    Thorin's attitude towards me began to change. I don't know the cause. It may have been something to do with Kili and Fili getting into trouble, but what ever it was, there is a growing tension between us. He either ignores me, or he's snappy with me. I know that it annoys Kili and upsets him when it happens. Fili is sympathetic, and Bofur is still quite kindly towards me, as is Bombur. Dwalin follows the lead of his king - there is no budging him. I'm not quite sure if Bifur knows what's going on. He always seems to be in a world of his own. I think it's got to be something to do with the axe injury he had to the head.

    Needless to say, I feel very uncomfortable these days around Thorin and Dwalin these days. Although the other dwarves are still kind towards me, they feign disinterest in me when either of them were around, part from the two young princes. Kili, especially was argumentative, which only seemed to cause more trouble. I suppose even if they didn't like the way I was being treated, they couldn't go against their king, and even though it hurt Kili and I greatly, it looked like all idea of marriage was off. I think it was that stupid article that Ori wrote in his paper that started it off, and then this problem with the gaol. I think Dwalin may have misconstrued what Kili and I were doing that night we helped Ristal. I think he thought we'd been up to something, when we weren't. I can't even concentrate on the books that Irieaga gave me to read as my mind is all over the place. What should I do? Should I stay here, and allow this to continue, or should I take up my grand parents and my uncle on their offer to go live with them? I really, really, really do not know what to do at this moment in time. After the loss of my family, this really is the last thing that I needed.
     
  8. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Oh no! :( :( For some reason, this change of attitude baffles me as much as Hilda. :_| I would hate it if she had to leave and even though she has blood-kin who would be loving and sympathetic, it would still be a heartbreaking thing to have to do!
     
  9. Mira_Jade

    Mira_Jade The (FavoriteTM) Fanfic Mod With the Cape star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jun 29, 2004
    Ack! And what a place to end it for the year. [face_worried] :( The change in attitude sat as ill with me as it did with Deb - and I, as always, remain interested to see where you will take this story next. :)
     
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  10. Space_Wolf

    Space_Wolf Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2007
    Well, Thorin can be stubborn at times and he's blaming Hilda for the trouble. I don't think Ori helped...
     
  11. Space_Wolf

    Space_Wolf Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2007
    A quick thing I did for the twitter rp, but I thought it would be nice to share it here, considering the time of year. I did it quickly so the grammar's a bit off in places and I was concentrating more on the dialect...
    ----------------------------------------------

    From Kili's Score Book:
    The Twelve Days of Yule:

    On t' fost day o' Yule, mi Âzyungâl sent t' me One Ring o' Power,

    On t' second day o' Yule, mi Âzyungâl sent t' me two grumpy elves n' One Ring o' Power,

    On t' third day o' Yule, mi Âzyungâl sent t' me three gruesome trolls, two grumpy elves n' One Ring o' Power,

    On t' forth day o' Yule, mi Âzyungâl sent t' me four adventurous hobbits, three gruesome trolls, two grumpy elves, n' One Ring o' Power,

    On t' fifth day o' Yule, mi Âzyungâl sent t' me, five istari wizards, four adventurous hobbits, three gruesome trolls, two grumpy elves n' One Ring o' Power,

    On t' sixth day o' Yule, mi Âzyungâl sent t' me, six Giant Eagles, five istari wizards, four adventurous hobbits, three gruesome trolls, two grumpy elves n' One Ring o' Power,

    On t' seventh day o' Yule, mi Âzyungâl sent t' me, seven queens of the Valier, six Giant Eagles, five istari wizards, four adventurous hobbits, three gruesome trolls, two grumpy elves n' One Ring o' Power,

    On t' eighth day o' Yule, mi Âzyungâl sent t' me, eight lords of the valar, seven queens of the Valier, six Giant Eagles, five istari wizards, four adventurous hobbits, three gruesome trolls, two grumpy elves n' One Ring o' Power,

    On t' ninth day o' Yule, mi Âzyungâl sent t' me, nine black riders, eight lords of the valar, seven queens of the Valier, six Giant Eagles, five istari wizards, four adventurous hobbits, three gruesome trolls, two grumpy elves n' One Ring o' Power,

    On t' tenth day o' Yule, mi Âzyungâl sent t' me, ten riders of Rohan, nine black riders, eight lords of the valar, seven queens of the Valier, six Giant Eagles, five istari wizards, four adventurous hobbits, three gruesome trolls, two grumpy elves n' One Ring o' Power,

    On t' eleventh day o' Yule, mi Âzyungâl sent t' me, eleven soldiers of Gondor, ten riders of Rohan, nine black riders, eight lords of the valar, seven queens of the Valier, six Giant Eagles, five istari wizards, four adventurous hobbits, three gruesome trolls, two grumpy elves n' One Ring o' Power,

    On t' twelfth day o' Yule, mi Âzyungâl sent t' me, twelve dwarf men, eleven soilders of Gondor, ten riders of Rohan, nine black riders,eight lords of the valar, seven queens of the Valier, six Giant Eagles, five istari wizards, four adventurous hobbits, three gruesome trolls, two grumpy elves n' One Ring o' Power,
     
  12. Space_Wolf

    Space_Wolf Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2007
    I had a look at the Unfinished Tales and couldn't find anything else that Gandalf could mention without revealing who the Istari actually are, so I decided to post this a little earlier than I planned.

    ----------------------------------------------------------

    Kili's Journal

    29th Rethe

    To say that I am really annoyed with my Uncle at the moment over the way he is treating Hilda would be an understatement. I make a point of avoiding Dwalin as much as I can, but it is difficult considering that we are all on top of each other. Gloin and Bofur have tried to assure me that my Uncle will calm down eventually and begin to see sense. I really do hope that is the case. Hilda doesn’t deserve it because she was a victim of those goons and both Fili and I feel like we have a duty to protect her from harm – a responsibility we all share since we found her and she is alone in the world. Because there are so few dwarf women, something which we are ashamed of because for the most part, we failed in our duty to protect them in the past, we now have a tendency to be over protective towards women. Just because Hilda is a hobbit and not a dwarf lady, it doesn’t take those feelings away at all and my Uncle should understand that. But there are times when he can be a bonehead, where the ossification is complete when it comes to matters of family pride and honour and poor Hilda is bearing the brunt of it. It’s not her fault! I could have pursued those men with Trotter and took them down that night they tried to harm Ristil, but I didn’t do it. If there is anyone to blame at all in this regard it should be placed squarely on my shoulders and not Hilda. It would be the same even if I wasn’t in love with her, as I would be angry if any lady was being treated like she is at the moment. That, dear Uncle, who is my father in all but name, is my pride and honour!

    It must be noted that Fili is just as annoyed and frustrated about it as I am. He wants me to be happy, of course, as all brothers do and he has developed a liking for Hilda. He’s told me that he would support me, even if it did go against the wishes of our Uncle, and prominent figures in our community like Dwalin. He is not as vocal about it as I am, at least when other dwarves are around. He can’t afford to be. Because of the dire situation that our people are in, it is important that we put on a united front so that outsiders do not get a even a small inkling that there is a strain upon our relationships. If they knew of it, it would give them an opening to cause great harm to our people.

    Gandalf has taken note of the problem and I caught him having a quiet discussion with my Uncle on the matter. Gandalf, not being a dwarf, and was therefore not bound by the same restraints that we have to abide by. He was firmly on Hilda’s side, but my Uncle of course, has to be his usual, stubborn and in this case, grumpy self on the matter.

    “There is no place for a hobbit among my people, especially one that causes as much disruption as this particular one does. I’ve no use for her,” Uncle Thorin said.

    “Even as a wizard and wise as I am, I would not deem it wise to be so dismissive of the lass. I cannot see all ends and neither can you, Master Dwarf, and there are wiser people than I whom would say the same!”

    It did intrigue me who he was talking about when he mentioned people wiser than himself. Who could he mean? I do of course; know about Lord Elrond of Rivendell. We have regular contact with elves from his realm and the elves of Refuge of Edhelion are his people. From them, we knew about the Lady Galadriel, and Celeborn… surely he meant them? He could not mean King Thranduil of the elven realm in Mirkwood. He was a bad neighbour during our time in Erebor, or so I have been told by my Mam and others. He didn’t respect our people. He wanted us for our work, the fine work that we put into our jewellery especially but like all the elves of his line, he refused to give us proper payment for our work. I heard Gandalf discussing the situation with my Uncle. The wizard was not happy about it one bit and advised my Uncle not to throw away an alliance with a good people. Dwarves do not forget betrayals easily and my Uncle wanted nothing to do with the elves. If there ever is an alliance between dwarves and elves, I think it will have to wait until Fili is on the throne. Perhaps when the situation is seen through younger eyes instead of eyes that are old and weary, a peace can be made. As for myself, I do not know what would is the correct course of action to take on the matter, but I will say this, that peace is better than conflict, especially when we have so many other enemies to face and fight against. Warring with elves seemed a silly prospect when viewed that way, since they are a good people.

    The only other person that sprang to mind at the talk of wise people would have been Radagast, the wizard that Ristil had been searching for. During a quiet moment, when there were no others in the common room apart from myself, Gandalf and the barman, I asked him about it.

    “My dear boy, I am a part of an order of wizards called the Istari. There are five of us, in all. There is Saruman the White, who is the leader of our order. He specializes in knowledge of the scientific arts.”

    I looked at him, a little confused. “What do you mean by that?”

    “He is an inventor, of course. He can craft machines, forge weapons,” A knowing smile crossed the wizard’s face. “He’s almost like a dwarf, in his own way.” There was a glint in his eyes which made me think that there was something that he was holding back from me and it made me curious, as well as a sad tone to his voice which he tried to keep out of it, but he was unable to do so, but the expression on his face convinced me that it would not be a wise move to try and enquire further about Saruman.

    “There are also the two blues, but I have not seen them in a great age. They have gone traveling eastwards, far beyond the Iron Hills of your folk, my lad. They have been gone so long that I have quite forgotten their names,” he chuckled at this. I got the impression that it embarrassed him, when he seemed to be quite knowledgeable about things and to forget the names of people who were in your order….It would have been like me forgetting Dwalin, or Gloin, and I said so.

    “The problem, my lad, is that I have forgotten more things than most will ever know because I have so much going on in my head,” He said, in a kindly fashion.

    “Of all the dwarves that I know, I think Balin, Oin, Ori and Lofnheid would understand your meaning,” I said.

    “How is that, dear fellow?” Gandalf asked, in that kindly way that he as.

    “Balin keeps a library back in Ered Luin. There are books of many subjects there. Oin looks after our health, with the help of some of the ladies like my Mam, but they only assist him. Hilda is interested in such things. She’s not as useless as my Uncle thinks….”

    “Your Uncle is only concerned for your welfare, and that of your brother. You still look rough.”

    He was right, of course. Although I was healing, I still had many bruises and aches all over the place, and I still feel lousy.

    “I don’t like it, though. I love that hobbit lass dearly. I wish my Uncle would give it a rest where she is concerned. She has been through a lot, more than someone really should have.”

    “You should put your mind at ease, Kili. Now, were where we? Ah yes…there is Radagast the Brown. He is the most gentle of all of us and prefers to be with the beasts than with people. He is also a healer and watches over the woods of Rhosgobel.”

    “He sounds like a woman I know,” and I told him about the old woman.

    “I know of her. She is a friend of my order.” I had a feeling that he knew quite a bit about this woman, but it was clear that he wasn’t going to tell me a thing, which was fine.

    “As for myself, I am Gandalf the Grey. I create fireworks which folk can use for their parties and celebrations. Sometimes I do other errands, like the one I am on with your Uncle here. The time is near when the mountain should be reclaimed by your people, and the dragon Smaug vanquished.”

    Again, I got the feeling that there was something he wasn’t telling me, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. Our conversation was cut short then because all of a sudden, a group of human men entered the common room, yelling for drinks. They appeared to be drunk already and the innkeeper forced them to leave the premises before any trouble could start. The inn’s common room, however, is not the right place to be discussing the retaking of Erebor, as there was no way of knowing who may be listening in. It wouldn’t do at all to have a horde of treasure-seeking nut cases trying to take back what is rightfully ours, there is no doubt at all in my mind that they would to their best to steal our people’s legacy from us.
     
  13. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    I sinceerely enjoyed Kili's indignant introspection & his talk with Gandalf - cool-ness! =D= =D=
     
  14. Mira_Jade

    Mira_Jade The (FavoriteTM) Fanfic Mod With the Cape star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jun 29, 2004
    I too enjoyed Kili's introspection - and how Gandalf too shared his annoyance over Thorin's treatment of Hilda. Really, any sort of scene like this with Gandalf is a treat, and I much enjoyed reading it! :) =D=
     
  15. Space_Wolf

    Space_Wolf Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2007
    So this is the cut-off point now with the part of the diary which is vote-able. I was hoping to have got the first entry of this year's diary up, but I've not finished it properly. Hopefully tomorrow?
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Hilda Greenhill's Diary

    30th Rethe

    My life really has taken a turn for the worst recently. After all the things I’ve been through, I cannot believe this is happening to me, not at all. I try to avoid everyone where possible and although I know Kili loves me, it doesn’t help. Fili and Bofur take Trotter out for me because Kili is still recovering from his injuries and I do not have the courage to go out alone, and because of the problems with Thorin, none of them will go with me. I suspect that they are under orders from him not to have much to do with me, either that, or they don’t want to risk his anger. Kili does talk to me when he gets the chance, but it is very rare that he’s able to do so, and Fili still talks to me, as does Bofur. Bofur always does his best to try and cheer me up with his jokes. Bombur and Bifur are always busy at the market – it is taking longer than we thought it would.

    I really will be glad when we are out of Bree and back on the road again. Even traversing the swamp is preferable to being in Bree. I can’t wait to get back to Thorin’s Gate because maybe by then relations with Thorin would have improved and even if he hasn’t, I can still talk to Ori, and even though I want to kill him for the article, he has always been a good friend to me. There is Gimli, too and he might not see things the same way as the others. Bild and Dis, I’m not so sure about, but Dis has always been able to make Thorin see sense where others can’t so she might be able to change his perspective of me – I can only hope, can’t I? I don’t know how Lyngheid and Lofnheid will react to me, though, with Dwalin being their father. I do consider those two friends, but they probably won’t want to defy him.

    When did I come to think of Thorin’s Gate as my home, I wondered? It was probably when we were at the farm and I saw the graves of my parents and brothers for the first time. I realized then that I could never go back to live on the farm and Thorin accepted me as one of them. I really don’t understand why he is acting as he is now, however. It hurts me more than I can ever express in words. I can only hope that his anger will blow over eventually and that he will forgive me for the problems I have caused, even if they really weren’t my fault. Maybe Kili and I spending the night in the hay loft had enraged him more than he let on? Looking back on it now, it seems a really stupid thing for us to have done, no matter how we felt about each other. We should have waited and should have been a bit more patient. I can only hope the situation can be fixed, especially since dwarves only love once in their life and the thought of Kili being alone is more painful to bear than my own misery.
     
  16. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Ouch! Poor Hilda, literally stuck in the middle! :( As is Kili and all that are her actual friends. [face_frustrated] Looking forward to how this continues.
     
  17. Space_Wolf

    Space_Wolf Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2007
    Kili’s Journal

    5th – 15th Astron

    We were on our way back home at last. We were forced to stay in Bree longer than we hoped because of the cost of bail to get Fili, Hilda and myself out of the jail. The charges against us were dropped, thankfully, but even so, Uncle Thorin was not happy about it. Me, I was just glad that Hilda hadn’t been seriously hurt and that the men who had attacked Ristil were where they belonged. Uncle Thorin is still being difficult towards Hilda, and to be honest, I cannot stand it!

    None of it was her fault, after all. It was inconvenient, sure, but nothing more than that. I have tried to talk to him about it, but when we do talk at all, we only argue with each other and he will no longer discuss the subject with me. I can only hope that Mam can make him see some sense!

    The whole situation is driving me nuts. Fili doesn’t like it either and is caught in the middle of it. When we have spoken about it in our room at night, he agrees with me, but when he is around the other dwarves, he cannot be seen to give me any support at all and must be seen to side with my Uncle. Bofur, of course, blames himself for the whole thing because if he’d not encouraged us to take Hilda into the market place and show her around, she would not have been attacked by those men.

    If only Fili and I had been paying proper attention to her, maybe it wouldn’t have happened, but you can fill your whole life with what if’s when awful things happen and it will never change the fact that it had happened. You can only try to fix things after the event has occurred, but some things just aren’t fixable and that needs to be accepted as well. I just hope that this wasn’t one of them…

    Gandalf had business to discuss with Uncle Thorin once we got back to Ered Luin, so he was accompanying us. Ristil was traveling with us, also, because Gandalf wanted to question her and the druid woman over the activities of the Necromancer. That was strange business which I must confess that I do not wholly understand. I had thought that much of the druid woman’s background was exaggeration built on events that had occurred years and years before I was born and turned into tavern tales to entertain drunken fools. The fact that some of what I’d heard could be true never even occurred to me until now.

    We passed through Hobbiton on the way back and Gandalf brought us to a place called Bog End. I don’t know why it was called that, because it wasn’t anywhere near a blooming Bog, not like that swampy place we passed through on the way to Bree. Unfortunately, the hobbit Gandalf wanted to see wasn’t at home. Gandalf wanted to wait for the hobbit’s return, but Uncle Thorin wanted to press on. He was anxious to get back to Ered Luin as he wanted to see if our people were alright after the difficulties of winter, especially as the errand we’d set out on had taken us far, far longer than we had anticipated.

    “From the look of the place, this Boggins looks more like a grocer, than a burglar, Gandalf. And looking after one hobbit -” he looked pointedly at Hilda. “-who can’t take care of themselves is more than enough trouble for us.”

    I think that was the final straw for poor Hilda. The hard time that Uncle Thorin had been giving her ever since that incident at Bree was wearing down her confidence. Uncle Thorin is not an easy dwarf to keep on the good side of and over the years, I’ve found that he is only ever quick to forgive Mam, my brother and I – everyone else he gives little slack. In fact, Mam’s probably the only person I know who can tell Uncle Thorin what to do and get away with it.

    Hilda, who had been sat on one of the steps with Trotter, got to her feet and started walking down the path, clearly upset. I made to follow her and she stopped to look back at me when she got to the gate.

    “I’m sure that he didn’t mean anything by it,” I tried to reassure her. She didn’t reply and just continued through the open gate, with the sheepdog following faithfully at her heels. I followed her through the gate and began to follow her as she started down the road back the way we had come.

    “Hilda, please stop,” I said.

    Hilda stopped and turned to look at me, on the verge of tears, and trying to fight to keep them back. I back glanced at my Uncle, wanting him to say something to her, but he didn’t. If he had at that moment, then maybe, just maybe things would have turned out differently that day, but that was not to be at all.

    “I don’t belong in Ered Luin, Kili,” Hilda said, her voice small. “I’m fed up of being blamed for everything that goes wrong.”

    The look she gave me tore my heart in two, not because she wanted to leave, but because she didn’t and was going to anyway because, in her eyes, no one accepted her. I also knew at that moment, there was no talking her out of leaving. Her mind had been firmly made up.

    “Where do you intend to go?” I asked.

    “Frog Morten, to my family,” she replied. “I’ve thought about it long and hard. It wasn’t easy for me. I belong in the Shire. You must realise that it is for the best.”

    Hilda turned to go and as she started walking away, I was about to call her back. What I hadn’t noticed was that Uncle Thorin had descended the path and was standing beside me.

    “Let her go, Kili, if that’s what she wants,” Uncle Thorin said. I can’t recall ever being angrier at my Uncle than at that moment, but figured it was not the right moment to argue with him, not in front of everyone.

    “I don’t think it is what she wants,” I said, but I didn’t say anything more on the subject. Sometimes, you just can’t. I thought about going after her, but as I made to go, I felt a strong hand grab my shoulder. I should have fought more. I should have pulled away from my Uncle and gone after her, but I did not. Instead, I just watched Hilda walk away until she was out of sight, all the time attempting to hide just how unhappy the whole thing made me.
     
  18. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Space_Wolf -- I know in my heart of hearts that Kili will regret that whole thing and relive it in his mind trying to wish another outcome, even when he's older than dirt! :( :_|
     
  19. Space_Wolf

    Space_Wolf Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2007
    Exactly, but every story needs some twists and turns in it.
     
  20. Mira_Jade

    Mira_Jade The (FavoriteTM) Fanfic Mod With the Cape star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jun 29, 2004
    Ack! I was afraid of that happening. :( That was perfectly heart-wrenching and awful, but I am looking forward to seeing where you carry on from here. =D=
     
  21. Space_Wolf

    Space_Wolf Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2007
    Hilda Greenhill's Diary

    15th Astron

    Walking away from Kili was the hardest thing I had ever done in my life. But the thing is, I wasn’t even angry with him, and worse than that, I loved him with all my heart and I knew he felt the same way. Why else would he have tried to stop me from leaving? But this had been brewing up for some time, ever since the article in the chronicle.

    Ori had broken my – no our trust with writing and printing the blasted thing. That was not something that I could forgive easily. I was fed up of the wide spread common knowledge of it where-ever we went. It was humiliating to have my life laid bare like that. It didn’t even matter about the apology – the damage was done and there was no way at all that it could be undone, and as sad as that may be, it is the truth.

    Then there was the incident in Bree. It wasn’t my fault that Trotter had confronted those men, but I knew that Thorin blamed me for the incarceration of his nephews. I just needed to go, to get away from them.

    I didn’t stop walking until I came to the Green Dragon. It was beginning to get late and I was hungry. I guessed that Trotter could do with the rest. Luckily, there was a spare room for the night as I knew that I wouldn’t make it to Frog Morten before darkness fully descended and I didn’t fancy traveling on through the darkness alone.

    That night, as I lay in bed, I felt more alone than ever, including the night of the day my family was killed. Was I doing the right thing, running away? Could I have done anything differently? When morning came, should I swallow my pride, head back to Bag End and follow them? I decided that the whole notion of that was folly, not because I was afraid of Thorin and what he might say if attempted to return, but because I was uneasy about traveling the road on my own. Having a companion would have made all the difference, but I was afraid of what I might encounter on the road. I was scared that I would come across some evil that I wouldn’t be able to deal with alone. Thoughts of orcs and bandits filled my head and I would not have been able to deal with any of that. So I decided the best course of action would be to go to my family. Kili knew where I would be if he wanted to come and find me, if his Uncle allowed him to do so.

    Was I doing the right thing? Probably not, and I missed Kili even more than ever.

    As I held on to my diary as if letting it go would be my death, I wondered if I should destroy it. It was extremely tempting to burn my diary in the fireplace and imagined, as I looked at flickering flames, my diary being consumed by it, it’s pages curling up as the fire blackened its pages until nothing more than ash remained of it.

    But if I did that, I would have lost everything I had of Kili, apart from the necklace he had given me for Yule. It was hard to believe that he was gone, far, far away from me. I held the necklace in my hand and clutched at the pendant, hoping that by doing so, it would give me the strength that I needed to live. To pick up the pieces of my shattered life and begin again anew. It was not easy at all. That night was sleepless and although I was weary, with the light of morning entering through my window, I gathered up my strength, ate more because I needed to than because I wanted to, paid up with the Innkeeper (the only bit of coin that I had left) and with Trotter at my side, I went…home.
     
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  22. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Excellent post showing Hilda's wondering about "am I doing the right thing" and deciding to return to Frog Morten and also keep the diary. I do not think she could have made any other decision at this point :( ... if things are to change, it'll have to come from the other side of things. :p [face_thinking]
     
  23. Space_Wolf

    Space_Wolf Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 13, 2007
    Of course Kili isn't happy about the whole thing. Dwarves only love once, as the saying goes.They are stubborn, so you can bet that he won't give up easily.

    -----------------------------


    Kili’s Journal

    15th Astron

    At camp that night, I kept away from the camp fire as much as possible. I didn’t want company, at least not the company of those who would allow the love of my life to be forced away from me. The only company I wanted was that of the ponies. Even when we were traveling, I hung at the back, whispering to Bungo as we rode. He didn't need to talk to me for me to know that he understood my unhappiness and he didn't judge. We were camped on a hill overlooking the village of Hobbition and I sat on a dry stone wall looking back at the road we had traveled, wondering if somewhere among the lights of the windows in the hobbit holes Hilda was looking back at me.

    I heard footsteps behind me, quite familiar ones and I knew before he even spoke that my Uncle was there behind me.

    “You should be with the rest of us, not sat brooding out here all by yourself,” Uncle Thorin’s voice, stern but kind, came from behind me. “I brought you this and thought that you might want to talk to me about what happened today.”

    He had borught me some stew, which he handed to me and I grudgingly accepted it, more out of habit than because I really wanted to eat. I was not hungry and didn’t feel like I could ever eat anything ever again, I missed her that much.

    “I’m not really sociable at the moment, Uncle,” I replied, eating a mouth full of the stew. It tasted of nothing in my mouth, at least not to me. It could have been one of the most delicious dishes prepared for the Yule feast and it still would have tasted of nothing at all to me at that moment.

    He leaned on the wall, and he looked me in the eye. “I know that you are taking this hard, Kili.”

    “Are you trying to apologize, Uncle?” I asked, probably a little too sarcastically. I really wasn’t in the mood for this talk. Couldn’t he see that I just wanted to be left alone by everyone, especially him.

    “It was never my intention to hurt you or Hilda like this,” he said, harshly.

    My thought at that was “Oh, here we go….”

    “Save it, Uncle,” I snapped. Hilda knows exactly what you think of her. We over heard you talking to Dwarlin about it before we left Bree.”

    He glanced at me and I could tell that he was trying his hardest to keep calm on the matter, but it wasn’t working one bit. I couldn’t tell if he was angry at me, or at himself, but I suppose it didn’t matter either way. It didn’t change the result. Hilda was gone.

    “What did you over hear?” he asked.

    “You said that ever since she showed up that Fili and I have been shirking our responsibilities, especially me,” I replied.

    “That is true ad you have. She’s been a bad influence on you in many areas.”

    I put the bowl of stew to one side, for the temptation to throw it in his face was really strong at that moment. “That’s not the way I see it,” I said, shaking my head in disgust.

    “Explain it to me,” Uncle Thorin could barely keep the anger from out of his voice.

    “While you were absent, just before Yule, Fili took over your duties. It was a difficult time for him and we didn’t know if you were going to come back or not. We had no idea at all if you were alive. Both of us went out on the orc patrols. Fili offered sanctuary to the elves in case the orcs attacked and I don’t consider any of those shirking our responsibilities.”

    “I have no complaints over either of you in that regard,” Uncle Thorin replied, sternly. “But there was the day I couldn’t find you when you should have been caring for the ponies. I then find out later that it turns out you had been fornicating with her. And you should have been helping out at the stall but instead you were brawling with ruffians in Brree’s Market Place.”

    Uncle Thorin did have a point concerning the ponies and although that night with Hilda had been quite wonderful, I was now wondering if it had been worth it. I should have waited until it had been allowable for us to do such things with each other. I couldn’t deny his complaint, apart from….

    “Bofur did say that he, Bifur and Bombur could handle the stall,” I pointed out.

    “Don’t lay the blame of this upon Bofur. You should have stayed on the stall like you were supposed to and not go goofing off,” Uncle Thorin said, quite coldly.

    At least the argument was now on what I should have done, or not should have done, etc, and not blaming Hilda. I could live with that, I suppose.

    “It wasn’t Hilda’s fault,” I said, trying to defend her. “But you deemed it fit to lay all of the blame at her feet.”

    “Perhaps it wasn’t her fault, not entirely,” Uncle Thorin conceded.

    “In that discussion you had with Dwalin, you said that Hilda doesn’t pull her own weight,” I said, and I pointed out all of the times she had been indispensible. “So why the hostility towards her?”

    “She caused you and your brother to bring shame down on to the line of Durin, that’s why.”

    So now we were finally getting somewhere. It’s all down to family honour. I suppose I could understand where my Uncle was coming from, but most of it was my fault and not Hilda’s at all, and I had to make him see that.

    “I asked her to the stables that night. I only wanted to talk to her and it went further than I’d expected it to,” I admitted. “And I should have reported the attack on Ristil to the Watch and encouraged her to do so. Maybe if I had, the Watch would have caught the men sooner, but there was no way of knowing for sure.”

    We argued a bit more. I think I caught Uncle Thorin by surprise that I wasn’t willing to let the subject drop.

    “You should appologise to Hilda,” I said, after he had finished tearing strips off me for behaving like a clot, but Uncle Thorin, being Uncle Thorin refused to consider it. It was typical of Uncle Thorin, prideful and stubborn.

    In the end, I don’t think it mattered who was right. The result was the same. I was parted from my love, whom I doubted I would ever see again. The stew was cold by the time I got round to eating it, but I didn’t care much. When Uncle Thorin was gone, Fili joined me.

    “Take heart, little brother,” Fili said to me. “You will see Hilda again.”

    “I just don’t see it, Fili,” I said.

    “I think you’ve forgotten something, Kili,” Fili said, with a smirk. “Someone will have to return her horse to her.”

    I grinned, having quite forgotten about Hilda’s horse! Fili, dear Fili! I think that made my day. I had quite forgotten until that moment that we had Crowberry.

     
  24. WarmNyota_SweetAyesha

    WarmNyota_SweetAyesha Chosen One star 8

    Registered:
    Aug 31, 2004
    Wellll, I guess that cleared the air somewhat. But each is still set on their original positions, not budging, not that Kili should. Thorin has valid points about chores perhaps but saying that Hilda's totally to blame and freezing her out entirely? Going overboard there.
     
  25. Mira_Jade

    Mira_Jade The (FavoriteTM) Fanfic Mod With the Cape star 5 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jun 29, 2004
    I too am glad that the air is somewhat cleared between them . . . somewhat. Thorin really is taking an unmovable stance on this, and not an entirely correct one, at that. But, I am glad that Kili is hanging in there - and he has Fili's excellent ideas to turn to. ;)

    Looking forward to the next update. =D=