The Hounslow Tourist Board

Blow me down, this has gotta be a first.

I say we turn it into some sort of Meca or something, join me in a celebration of the single most exciting place in the universe.

Lets make Hounslow the centre of the heavens and make God himself notice us again, then look away a bit sheepishly mutter something about not being his department.

I heard there was an intresting poo here once.......

I, for one, wish to bring notice of the fabled street 'entertainers' that used to congregate in Hounslow High Street. Particular mention should be made of the Preacher man who always got heckled by 12 year olds during his 'fire and brimstone' tirade, and also the wonderfully camp Michael Jackson impersonator. He has the full spangly outfit, and ONE, get that, ONE glove. Sadly, he did not have a chimp or a 'balancing baby'. Some locals still swear you can hear the echo of his moonwalk in the cold, winter nights...

Good 'ol Micheal. Sure beats Dancing twat man or Gumpboy. You could actually by his CD's (why!!?)great fun could be had sharpening them and lobbing them back at him, his dancing didn't bloody help him then. I've still got his ear!

Aaaah yes the legendary Mark Hanley (i think? )

Still - better then the current crop. We still have blind man with organ and are being overrun by metal benders.....

In recent years Hounslow High St seems to have done a roaring trade in attracting Peruvian folk bands from the deepest depths of the Andes...

...sadly, Shakira has not seen fit to join them...

We got whistle guy as well, or is the blind man as well. Either way he's still crap.

I just witnessed Hounslow East tube station destroyed by Alians!

Alians!>!>>!>!!

Where?

Alians or Asians?

Alians, just flew by and blew it up. Can you believe it? Got caught on CCTV. Went to Macky D's afterwards. Arghhh the mess after, that'll teach them.

Did you know there's a festival this weekend, just found it.

"Hounslow festival of gastrointestinally-projected pavement art, outside Yates' wine lodge."

I think it's organised by Green Fiddler.

oh dear god...

aaaah, the green fiddler! he's one of my favorite organisers..

I used to work in a shop opposite Woolies and so I remember most of the street performers. Funniest time was when one guy (old, playing the worst version of Wind Beneath My Wings on a.... don't kno what its called) was outside, the the God Squad (church choir) started up. He got so p1ssed he tried turning up his amp but still not load enuff. He then got up and started arguing into his full-on mic at em!! lol!
I can also claim to have seen wacko first, weeks before he became a regular.
And, another story, (i werent there) it was someone i worked withs birthday. the then saturday girl paid Cactus Jack (u kno im) £5 to come into the shop, and sing Happy Birthday!!!

And if you miss these street performers, some are still going strong. I saw Cactus in Kingston high Street the other day. possibly in staines too....