JCC The JCC Guide to Preventing Meltdowns

That thread about the best JC meltdowns made me want to try to contribute to preventing meltdowns in the future. Not sure why, they're so much fun.

So let's compile a list of tips.

1) Stop caring. Or care less. This gets #1 not only because it diffuses any situation and makes all other tips redundant, but because meltdowners always seem to be unaware of how little the JCC really cares. Always remember that nobody cares. Nobody cares that you said something stupid and made an ass of yourself, nobody cares about your e-rep. People often forget things quickly, and even when they don't it doesn't mean they actually care. Nobody cares that you're mad. Nobody really cares about you or what you say. When you have a meltdown, people just sorta look at it for a few seconds, probably laugh, and then move on. Sorta like driving by a car accident. Except for the laughs.

2) Just stop posting. Please. It's not helping, you're just making it worse. You can't dig your way out of this. So many meltdowns could have been avoided if people just knew when to quit. We're all watching you self-destruct and we're all laughing and "egging you on" just to see how far you'll go. So don't indulge us. Just let it drop and walk away. Don't try to defend yourself, that means you care, that means you're breaking rule #1, which is just like blood in the water to us. Whatever you do, don't scramble madly to respond to every single post in self-defense, that just sets off a feeding frenzy. You can't defend yourself anyway, not to this crowd. So just accept that you said something stupid, accept your ridicule and minimize it by letting it die. Unless you said something particularly hilarious, it'll probably die and be forgotten in a day or so. It might get brought back up again somewhere down the road, but it'll just be a "remember when" situation that will immediately die again if you let it. Take a time out, a deep breath, count to ten, whatever. Just walk away, and we'll spare your life. Just walk away, and we'll give you safe passage out of the JCC. Just walk away and we will put an end to the horror.

3) This is kinda redundant to #1, but don't expect any sort of civility, maturity, manners, decency, sensitivity, morality or anything like that. Don't expect anything serious. Don't expect "good" discussion. We generally don't do that here. Do expect lots of jokes, especially at someone's expense.

So I'm going to cite some examples where the rules would have helped immensely.

Exhibit A

I'll start with a noob who dropped by recently and had a meltdown in short order.

Jedi Dragon D, starting with this post. http://boards.theforce.net/threads/...sasters-thread.50018878/page-17#post-51688898

He starts by saying tragedy isn't funny and he's looking for serious and mature discussion. Rule three, off to a bad start. dp4m tries to clue him in with "you must be new here", but the hint was not taken. Oh yeah, social awareness helps prevent meltdowns, too. Try not to have autism or aspergers. Then he says he's leaving, but sticks around. Noobs, don't do this, it's hilarious attention whoring. Never ever say you're going to leave. Just leave if you're going to leave, otherwise shut up. Saying you're leaving assumes anyone cares, breaking rule #1.

Jedi Dragon D is mocked aplenty, and even though the mods try to help him by explaining the JCC, he doesn't take the hint. He just comes back for more.

Once his racist posts were brought up, he comes back to defend them. This was definitely the time to walk away for good. Rule #2. JP points it out, "you're still here". He tries to prove he is not racist, implying that he cares and/or that we care. Rule #1.

JP again tries to help the guy out here http://boards.theforce.net/threads/...sasters-thread.50018878/page-21#post-51691579

Rule #2 again, just stop posting. Noobs, when people try to give you tips about how to fit in, or just not make a total ass of yourself, you should strongly consider heeding their advice.


Exhibit B

Merlin_Ambrosius69's fanboy thread. http://boards.theforce.net/threads/the-term-fanboy-is-derogatory.50013837/

This one is particularly sad because the guy had been around a long time.

Looking back at Merlin's fanboy thread is kinda painful and it's the epitome of so many meltdowns. It started pretty damn small, and even though he made it way bigger than it had any reason to be, in the end it actually was still pretty small. Nobody really cared but him. #1.

In the OP he says he'd be happy to be proven wrong. I guess not.

Even WOCKY of all people lets him know the deal with the first response, "no one curr".

He asks to be proven wrong, and goes on a rampage of defensive posts. He makes ten posts in the first thirty minutes of the thread, all on page one. A triple post on the next page. Sad, it could have ended on the first page.

Merlin says he will take points made to heart. Showing that he cares. A lot. Rule #1.

He points out people being rude. The JCC is rude, don't bother pointing it out.

He says he's going to drop it on the second page, but of course doesn't. Immediately after even OZK points out that nobody cares.

tom tries to help him out here:

Good advice. Of course he doesn't heed it. http://boards.theforce.net/threads/the-term-fanboy-is-derogatory.50013837/page-2#post-50874414

Merlin's post here is a trifecta:

He thinks he's created a host of enemies. No he hasn't, nobody cares, not enough to be your enemy. He takes several points to heart, showing he cares. He says he's out, which is a no no (because it assumes people care), but comes back, which just makes it funnier.

EmpireForever tries to ease the humiliation. Another example of a JCCer trying to help, we're not all bad all the time. Eeth-My-Koth even says not to take it to heart. This is the JCC.

SLG proves #1 here.

Another point: be cautious about revealing personal info, especially if it can easily be used to mock you. If you reveal personal stuff and it is used to mock you, try to take it in stride, or just the very best you can.

Btw, all of this and more was all in the first three pages of the thread, within about two hours of the OP. Just walking away for a breather might have saved a lot embarrassment.

Merlin continues posting, trying to defend himself by citing his wife's FB post, and saying he's caring and compassionate. He says he finds this debacle unsettling. Again, caring way too much. It's a debacle entirely of his own making.

Someone brings up his John Edwards post from the temp boards, and instead of letting it go he says "here's where my past comes back to haunt me!" Not really, you don't really have a past on here, at least not one that anyone really cares about.

He even creates a catchphrase for himself by repeating "windmill-tilting" over and over.

I was going to quit because Merlin did, but then someone brings up Skywalker8921's Russian royalty thread and she immediately drops by for a meltdown, starting by calling people "rude, obnoxious jerks" and leaving with yet another "goodbye forever". LOL classic, not even her thread, she makes only a single post and it's still an epic meltdown.

Every time Skywalker8921 does this, it's completely out of nowhere and no one really cares. We all just sort of go "lolwut", stare for a couple seconds and then carry on. Which allows for her to come right back, because nobody cares, so there's nothing to really worry about.

Let's compile a list of things that are clear signs of a meltdown so maybe people can stop when they recognize they're doing something on this list.

1) Any sort of "goodbye forever" post.
2) Telling everyone to shut up.
3) Rapid fire angry posting.

Alright, that's enough out of me.

You guys have any more tips or clear signs of a meltdown? You might be able to save a JCer.

 

i don't want to save any jcers

 

I feel like point 1 and this thread are at cross purposes.

 

Just pull a Homer:

 

Actually, I've got one:

3) Don't request an account deletion. The admins and the rest of the staff don't delete accounts. Stop PMing me. Please.

 

lol.... "stop caring..."


.... *posts tl'dr thread

 

Shut up Ramza, do you even basic logic?

 

Hi. I'm just filling in for Movie/Jesusfan whilst he is away at the... meetings.

Cheers!

 

You know if we actually had insightful mature conversations about sex, the mods' heads would collectively explode.

 

Condoms: Great water balloon substitute, or not?

 

This thread reminds me of slogan I once read. I'm gonna have to find it.

 

Shut up! Goodbye forever! I'm angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry!!!

Glad I got that off my chest.


Let's go get a beer, all right?

 

I'm already there... stopped reading your OP right after that sentence.

 

I actually disagreed with a fair amount of that post. Specifically, the notion that "no one cares" and that people's actions don't or shouldn't follow them. This is a small message board. Many of us have been around for years. In regards to Merlin, pretty much the latter half of that thread was about people confronting him on his views condoning cheating on a significant other. This wasn't because people "didn't care" or where just looking for something to laugh at. It's because they legitimately felt that this was an awful, indefensible viewpoint that he ought no longer hold.

I would agree that people shouldn't hold on to small embarrassments, or over-think how much people regard you. But it's absolutely not the case that we are not, in the general sense, aware of how we behave towards one another.

 

I thought this thread was going to provide helpful tips for maintaining a nuclear power plant. Disappointed.

 

Both Exhibit A and Exhibit B passed me by (the stuff I miss on here )

I do think it's actually kind of bad to post the link to Exhibit B - I really can't imagine what "issue's" were going on in that particular meltdown, but even a year on the whole thing looks crushingly embarrassing.

Oh and On Topic:

If you can't handle your drink (or drugs) stay off JC until your at least 40% sober.

 

Step 1:



Amazing.

 

Go out and mow the lawn first?