The Kill Darth Real Life Project: ALL members report in

Oh, let's see...the day after AOTC came out, I went up against DRL in the Starline Derby, but he was too slow to keep up, so I couldn't take him out. A week later came the Vinta Harvest Classic, and who should be there but...DRL! (This is an everlasting challenge until one of us destroys the other, y'see.) He tried to slam me against a guardrail, but I bumped him off--he was out of the race but survived, unfortunately. And FINALLY, the week after that came the big chance: the Wroshyr Rally. I let DRL catch up with me on a nice thick branch about five kilometers above ground level, and WHAM!!! Off he went!!! DRL will assassinate me no more!!!

 

This is agent 24, excal the protector, reporting in with status on my mission to kill and annoy the living daylights outta Darth Real Life and Darth Procrastinator: temporary success!

Last night I typed three pages for my story with Grand Admiral Jaxx- Destiny's Knights, and it was the first time in over two months I have been able to do it! And I had fun too!

And Darth Real Life has been beat up bad too-nothing is stopping me from having fun, and I saw Attack of the Clones again today, which made my summer even better.

Now to continue the fight...

excal the protector, agent 24

 

*A lone figure staggers in. His Jedi robes torn, burn and dirty, carrying a damaged, sputtering blue lightsaber in one hand and a black cloak that seems to give off a "Impression of Reality" in the other.*

I have been in deep under cover watching the movements of DRL and his cohorts. But Darth Computer uncovered me and attack and soon to follow DRL himself, I was aided by Jedi Master Laptop, who held Darth computer at bay.
But my battle with DRL was tough... i when through 3 sets of lightsabers and 2 duelblades to drive him off, leaving only this cloak behind...

Glad to be back here.

*Seeing nobody around he sits down on the couch, grabs a sprite and starts flipping through the holo channels.*

 

*runs in*

URG! I thought that Darth Real Life went into hibernation in summer!

*thwacks a DRL clone*

But he must secretly be in league with Darth Summer Reading, which waits until you're in a summer stupor and then creeps up behind you really quietly and then-

*HRRGHMMFFF!!*

 

I, Falls_the_Shadow, being of sound body. (I make no guarantees about soundness of mind), declare to capture, torment, and to engage in mortal combat with Darth Real Life. I will not be led astray by promises of chocolate or autographs from Hayden Christensen or Ewan McGregor, no matter how tempting. I accept the responsibilities of a K.D.R.L.P. Agent and wish it to be known that I am now Agent #42, Hitchhiker of the Galaxy Far, Far, Away, and Padawan to Master Joseph Campbell.

Darth Procrastination draws his power by magnifying the evils of Darth Real Life. Fight them, we will.

Note: I could be turned to the Real Side, if SW stunt coordinator Nick Gillard offered to train me in lightsaber skills, but would that really count as Real Life?

E-mail in profile.

Vivat the Jedi!

 

A new member! Welcome! I, Mcily_Nochi Ewok Friend, salute you.

 

Welcome Gutter_Monkey.

 

Welcome Falls_the_Shadow. You are number 27, not 42.

 

It's been a while since this has happened...

 

Took advantage of DRL's achillies heel- his alergic raction to all things fluffy and whopped him! Started on first part of new fic!

 

darth real life is in the form of my niece and nephew whom I babysat this past weekend on Saturday night.



If I could have stayed home, I could have worked on my story.

 

Thank you all for the warm welcome.

Empress of Justice, I know that I am not the forty-second member. Instead, like my first title, #42 is a reference to Douglas Adams's The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy [the galaxy's biggest supercomputer was asked to come up with an answer to the ultimate question of Life, the Universe, and Everything. The answer was 42.]

 

Wow, new people . . .

I, too, have been attacked by DRL, in a very real and personal way. Suffice it to say that I'm getting help, and I'll be okay with time.

 

SUCCESS!

An ancent holocorn found in the basement of the Jedi Temple has lead me to the remote planet Hevile, where I obtained a rare and achent artifact known as an IBM Lap Top. I will now be able to focus my efforts against DRL even more effectively, under cover of schoolwork! He'll never know what hit him!

 

I took Gutter_Monkey's approach and subjected DRL to the first sumer flu of the year... Today I FINISHED my little Ani/Padme romantic moment, "The Rocker Chair" (go on, give it a read, only 7 little chapters!)

 

DarthBreezy,

I LOL at your new signature block:

Oh pool boy... long Island Iced tea and some chocolate please!

Like my solo lightsaber coaching with Nick Gillard, I wonder whether your sunbathing at that pool would really count as DRL.


Well, I worked on a sketch for a fan fic last night. Must go hunt down DRL tomorrow.

 

The last post in this thread is pretty old, but here goes:

I, The_Standmaiden, being of sound body. (I make no guarantees about soundness of mind), declare to capture, torment,and attempt to kill Darth Real Life. I will not be led astray by promises of chocolate or autographs from Hayden Christensen
or Ewan McGregor, no matter how tempting. I accept the responsibilities of a K.D.R.L.P. Agent and wish it to be known that I am now Agent #28. (I think)


DRL is eating me alive and it's time to fight back!

EDIT: To whoever was talking about Nick Gillard: he played a handmaiden in TPM!

 

So Eirtae was actually Gillard in drag?

 

No, he was an "uncredited handmaiden". There is a rather . . . masculine looking one that isn't one of the actual handmaidens, might be that one.

 

::staggers back into thread, burned and covered in perspiration and bleeding from several different spots::

You know, guys, I think I've been fighting DRL for too long now. Last night, I dreamed that I was Gandalf and DRL was pursuing me in full Balrog regalia. We re-enacted the entire bridge scene with the rest of the KDRLP waiting on the other side. Needless to say, I didn't make it--long I fell, and he fell with me, and then I woke up.

Okay, so maybe this is a combination of too much battle with DRL and too many viewings of TTT. Either way, I insist this foe is NOT beyond any of us.

 

Okay, here goes.

I, JediNemesis, being of sound body (I make no guarantees about soundness of mind) declare to capture, torment and attempt to kill Darth Real Life. I will not be led astray by promises of chocolate or autographs from Hayden Christensen or Ewan McGregor, no matter how tempting. I accept the responsibilities of a K.D.R.L.P. Agent and make it known that I am now Agent #29.

Death to DRL!

And SCWTD (Something Considerably Worse Than Death) to DWB!

- JediNemesis, Queen of the Despised Science Fiction Freaks

PS. DRL is staying well away right now. My new younger brother, Haakon Gregory Columba, was born yesterday, and so homework and other instruments of DRL can officially Get Stuffed. - Nemesis