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The Lesson (JA, Humour)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Shaindl, Aug 21, 2002.

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  1. Shaindl

    Shaindl Jedi Master star 4

    Jun 18, 2002
    Okay, this is only the second time I've posted anything and I've never in my life tried humour, so any help, pointers, criticism is greatly appreciated.

    I don't own anything or anyone from the GFFA, so don't send anyone in spiffy expensive suits after me (besides, I don't have any money - it all goes to the student loan people).


    The Lesson

    ?I?m never going to get this right.?

    His Master ignored the outburst, and simply said, ?Once more, Padawan.?

    The 14-year-old Padawan in question sighed in frustration and turned back to the task at hand. He closed his eyes, reached inside himself and sought his centre as he had been taught to do. If he had any hope of ever mastering this particular skill, he would have to hold tight to his calm. He let the Force wash over and through him, taking a moment to revel in the river of energy and light that was always flowing around him.

    He took a deep breath and opened his eyes, determination flashing suddenly across his face. There was no way he was going to let a few chunks of metal get the best of him. He was better than they were, for Force?s sake. He was a Jedi, he could do this.

    A few minutes later, his silent vow to stay calm lay in shards in his mind. Forget it. There?s no way in the seven Sith hells anyone can get the hang of this.

    //Padawan. Watch your language.// The Padawan rolled his eyes and sighed again. Great. He?d been broadcasting his thoughts too. Were there any Jedi skills he could do right?

    He narrowed his eyes and glared at the objects in front of him. With a little judicious use of the Force, he thought, he could throw the offending bits of metal across the room. In fact, I bet I could get them to shatter, and then I wouldn?t have to look at them anymore. Nobody would have to. We?d live in a galaxy without them. A fine place that galaxy would be, no Sith and no?

    ?Padawan. Focus. Please??

    He looked across at his Master, then shut his eyes and sighed again. It seemed like he had been doing that a lot recently. Maybe he hates me. That would explain everything. He opened his eyes, to find his Master struggling to hide a grin.

    ?I don?t hate you Padawan. Every Jedi must master this ? we need to know it in order to carry out some of our responsibilities as Jedi. Now, try once more and then we?ll leave this for the day. Maybe we could go spar.?

    The Padawan looked up with a sudden smile at that last statement. Sparring was his favourite thing to do ? it would be good to get of here after this and do something physical. With that in mind, he closed his eyes yet again, and settled his mind. This would be his best attempt so far, he decided. He?d get it this time.

    He opened his eyes and studied the array in front of him. He took a deep breath and started the litany again.

    ?Okay. The small fork on the left is for salads??
  2. sheleigh

    sheleigh Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jan 31, 2002
    Aww- cute!

    I never got which fork is used for which! [face_laugh]

    Again- adorable... :)
  3. obaona

    obaona Jedi Master star 4

    Jun 18, 2002
    [face_laugh] That was good! I took me years to figure that out . . . 8-} and it was agony!

    No suggestions. It's fine the way it is. :)
  4. Wild_Huntress

    Wild_Huntress Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jul 15, 2002
    ROFL! That was SO funny! Ha! OMG! You had me going the whole time, I thought it was for sure some big huge serious important Jedi skill and what a twist! Absolutely brilliant!
  5. Shaindl

    Shaindl Jedi Master star 4

    Jun 18, 2002
    It might could be...IT IS!

    The shameless up!

    Sorry - just hoping I might get a couple more responses before I leave work tonight.

    Thanks for the reviews - I wasn't sure how this would go over.
  6. Malz4JESUS

    Malz4JESUS Jedi Master star 5

    Apr 12, 2002
    That was cool! :D
    God bless you!

  7. Jedi_Suzuran

    Jedi_Suzuran Jedi Knight star 5

    May 22, 2002
    That was a great little vignette. [face_laugh]
  8. PadawanKitara

    PadawanKitara Jedi Master star 5

    Dec 31, 2001
    Very funny- a great way to torture a child :)
  9. jedi_bounty

    jedi_bounty Jedi Youngling star 3

    Jul 26, 2002
    Great Shaindl! :D
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