The Monty Python Star Wars Parody Thread

Discussion in 'Star Wars Community' started by lumberjedi, Sep 4, 2002.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. TallChewie Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 6, 2002
    star 1
    PALPATINE: Be quiet! I order you to be quiet!

    WOMAN: Order, eh -- who does he think he is?

    PALPATINE: I am your Emperor!

    WOMAN: Well, I didn't vote for you.

    PALPATINE: You don't vote for Emperors!

    WOMAN: Well, ?ow did you become Emperor then?

    PALPATINE: By harnessing the power of the Force and wielding that power to manipulate the creation of a clone army that will obey my every command! That is why I am your Emperor!

    DENNIS: Listen ? invisible ?Forces? and carbon copies of two bit bounty hunters are no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some ancient religion!

    PALPATINE: Be quiet!

    DENNIS: You can?t expect to wield supreme executive power just because you have the ability to make a rock float in the air.

    PALPATINE: Shut up!

    DENNIS: I mean, if I went round, saying I was an Emperor, just because a bunch of helmeted look-alikes followed me around, they?d put me away!

    PALPATINE: Shut up! Will you shut up!

    DENNIS: Ah, now we see the violence inherent in the system.

    PALPATINE: Shut up!

    DENNIS: Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system! --- HELP! HELP! I'm being repressed!

    PALPATINE: Bloody peasant! (does Force choke on Dennis)

    DENNIS: (Choking) What....a....give...away....(collapses)

  2. Lieutenant Piett Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 19, 1999
    star 4
    Dear Sirs,

    I wish to object strongly to that last post. I've been trying to levitate rocks every day for the past twenty-nine years and it hasn't done me any harm except blurred vision and the occasional splitting headache.

    Sincerely,
    Brigadier General Qua-Loc Crix Fitt Fitt Fitt Ffffittttt Smyth Wobegon-Ganoubi (Mrs.)

    P.S. Aaaaaaaaggghhhhhhhh!!
  3. lumberjedi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 17, 2002
    star 5
    Why are we here? What's life all about?
    Is Force really real, or is there some doubt?
    Well, tonight, we're going to sort it all out,
    For, tonight, it's 'The Meaning of Life'.
    What's the point of all this hoax?
    Is it the bantha and the egg time? Are we just fodder?
    Or, perhaps, we're just one of Force's little jokes.
    Well, ça c'est le 'Meaning of Life'.

    Is life just a game where we make up the rules
    While we're searching for something to say,
    Or are we just simply spiralling coils
    Of self-replicating Midichlorians. Nay, nay, nay, nay, nay, nay.

    In this 'life', what is our fate?
    Is there One and All? Do we reincarnate?
    Is mankind evolving, or is it too late?
    Well, tonight, here's 'The Meaning of Life'.

    For millions, this 'life' is a sad vale of tears,
    Sitting 'round with rien nothing to say
    While the Jedi say we're just simply midichlorians
    Of self-replicating Midi's. Nay, nay, nay, nay, nay, nay.

    So, just why-- why are we here,
    And just what-- what-- what-- what do we fear?
    Well, ce soir, for a change, it will all be made clear,
    For this is 'The Meaning of Life'. C'est le sens de la vie.
    This is 'The Meaning of Life'.

  4. Corran_Horn_ Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 7, 2002
    star 4
    *Sung to the SPAM song*


    BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK,

    BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK,


    BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK,


    BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK,


    BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK,


    BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK,


    BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK,


    BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK,


    BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK,


    BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK, BLUE MILK. . .
  5. Shadows_of_the_Sith Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 29, 2002
    star 1
    There's help for people like you


  6. Shadows_of_the_Sith Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 29, 2002
    star 1
    This it it

    The offical "Knights of the Round Table Song", from FurryJedi
    I, Shadows of the Sith, bring to the world the expained song-
    GET ON WITH IT!
    -oh right

    We're the hunters of Jabba's table
    our price is formable
    on many time we eat some thyme
    and sit a round watching cable
    We dine well here at Jabba's a lot
    we eat sand and spam and mynocks

    Jabba the Hutt is no fable
    he's bigger that the tower of bable
    Yep he's fat, he ate Bib's cat
    and used Han Solo as a table
    He feeds people to his rancor a lot
    we like to hear them screem a lot

    *tap dancing jawas*
    *pig gaurd playing drums on B'moore monk's jars, then hitting the monkey-lizard*

    Through the hunt we're though and able
    Bossak has a girlfriend named Maybel
    When we're board and done our chorces
    IG impersonates Clark Gable
    We are the best bounty hunters yet;
    -Im a clone of Jango Fett-

    c3po- on second thought, lets not go to jabba's. it's a silly place
    r2d2- boop
  7. Az-Azzameen Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 24, 2002
    star 5
    Every Midichlorian is Sacred

    There are Bith in the world.
    There are Wookies.
    There are Hutts and Devaronians, and then
    There are those that follow Mon Calamari, but
    I've never been one of them.

    I'm a LightSide Jedi,
    And have been since before I was born,
    And the one thing they say about Jedi is:
    They'll take you as soon as you're warm.

    You don't have to be a six-footer.
    You don't have to have a great brain.
    You don't have to have any clothes on. You're
    A Jedi the moment your born,

    Because

    Every midichlorian is sacred.
    Every midichlorian is great.
    If a midichlorian is wasted,
    The Force gets quite irate.

    Every midichlorian is sacred.
    Every midichlorian is great.
    If a midichlorian is wasted,
    The Force gets quite irate.

    Let the heathen spill theirs
    On the dusty ground.
    The Force shall make them pay for
    Each midichlorian that can't be found.

    Every midichlorian is wanted.
    Every midichlorian is good.
    Every midichlorian is needed
    In your neighbourhood.

    Hutts, Bith, Rodians,
    Just don't seem to care,
    But The Force loves those
    Jedi everywhere.

    Every midichlorian is sacred.
    Every midichlorian is great.
    If a midichlorian is wasted,
    The Force gets quite irate.

    Every midichlorian is sacred.
    Every midichlorian is good.
    Every midichlorian is needed
    In your neighbourhood!

    Every midichlorian is useful.
    Every midichlorian is fine.
    The Force needs everybody's.
    Mine! And mine! And mine!

    Let the Sith spill theirs
    O'er mountain, hill, and plain.
    The Force shall strike them down for
    Each midichlorian that's spilt in vain.

    Every midichlorian is sacred.
    Every midichlorian is good.
    Every midichlorian is needed
    In your neighbourhood.

    Every midichlorian is sacred.
    Every midichlorian is great.
    If a midichlorian is wasted,
    The Force gets quite iraaaaate!
  8. lumberjedi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 17, 2002
    star 5
    haha! [face_laugh] meaning of life is awesome!

    21-B~ Leia is giving birth! bring us the machine that goes 'PING'...
  9. Massiff_Attack Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 25, 2002
    star 3
    This is from the Meaning of Life, the bit with the waiter, Gaston. Hope you like it.


    LUKE: As for me, huh, if you want to know what I think, I'll show you something. Come with me...

    ...come on...
  10. Massiff_Attack Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 25, 2002
    star 3
    ...this way. Come on. Don't be shy. Mind the stairs, all right? I think this will help explain. Come along. Come along. Over here...

    ...come on. Come on...
  11. Massiff_Attack Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 25, 2002
    star 3
    ...come on. This way. Stay by me...

    ...nearly there, now. You see that? That's where I was born.

    [image=http://www.starwars.com/databank/location/larsmoisturefarm/img/bts_bg.jpg]

    You know, one day, my-- my aunt, she put me on her knee and she said to me: ?Luke, my adopted son, the world is a beautiful place. You must go into it and... love everyone, try to make everyone happy, and bring peace and contentment everywhere you go?, and so, I became a Jedi. Well, it's-- it's not much of a philosophy, I know, but, well...

    ...**** you. I can live my own life in my own way if I want to. **** off.


    :D
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.