Oceania The National Dump!!!!!!!!! With PoT and J.E

The Save a Terrorist Foundation is not a joke!

However what you have to avoid is the 'terrorist bludger'. These are the blokes who you fund with your own hard earned money to do their jobs and instead just live off your handouts like their on welfare payments! Well we can't have that, can we?

And how about giving the kiddies a chainsaw instead of an axe? Whilst the initial cost may be huge you'll get increased output - and kiddies love chainsaws!! (as long as the chainsaws don't favour the kiddies..)

 

I hardly see how that would work. What today's kids need is a good hard chop, giving them chainsaws would only increase their laziness and, let's face it, today's kids are fat enough as it is. We need to get them back into the outdoors, getting some exercise and most importantly CHOPPING! Because if there's anything that we've learnt from our great Aussie hero Mark Reid, it's that choppers can become celebrities too.

 

Mark Reid? Are you mad? What has that bloke ever done for you? He wrote B-grade books and killed a few people. Maybe HE should go into politics, then he would be working for you.
DAMNIT
Right here, I make a stand, nay, a PLEDGE to help get Chopper Reid into our hallowed halls. Imagine his highness gracing our parliaments. Sure would show those ass-clown democrats a thing or two.

FURTHERMORE
I would like to make a pledge for the - unofficial - ass clown of the week award.
*distant drum roll*

Andrew Murray!
What that man has single handedly done is brought our politicians some time to create more scandal and avert our eyes from the oncoming war. What an ass-clown.

I feel great to be national once more.

 

My friends, admist this talk of "Save A Terrorist" and "ECHTRTAA", both pressing concerns in the wide scheme of things, another issue has smashed my face - no, it's not wrestling, though I'll touch on that later - an issue inspired by Rogue_Product.

It is the spelling of arse.

Quite frankly, the spelling of arse - in that many Australians now spell it as ass - is an example of American sensationalism, an omniptent tide of intellectual minuteness. Whilst I know Rogue_Product is anything but a victim of American sensationalism, but rather a lazy bugger(of a sort!), there are many Aussie battlers out there who are reduced to spelling it the American way and this, PoT, has got up my nose!

To me, the whole joy of saying "arse" is putting emphasis on the r, drilling it out with a finese you don't often see in the younger set because they are forced to follow orders rather than their own passion! And if you think I'm having a go at the American people than you're wrong because it's the Entertainer's administration that I'm fussed about, ladies and gents! I say that this "following orders" malarky is what American sensationalism is all about! The younger set's creativity is thrown out the window and they are forced to blandly proclaim "ass" rather than passionately shout "arse".

American sensationalism has cast its spell upon many Aussie youths today, PoT, and personally I blame the networks for showing programs as dangerous as Sesame Street on TV - it's not sending the right message! That's not how you spell arse!!!!

Your thoughts?

 

My thoughts? I'm just happy to be annointed the title of "bugger"...

*warm fuzzy feeling inside which has nothing to do with buggery*

 

To tell the truth JE, I'm excited.

Not about the oft wronged spelling of 'arse' - which is bloody appalling - but excited by the new craze thats sweeping the nation!

It's the 'in exile' fad, better then a brand of clothing, a type of accessory or a new hairstyle, is a left-wing new-age idealogy, and that's what everyone's favourite little Democratic Senator has delivered to us!

Now Dumpsters-in-exile such as myself always must give pause to our excitement to ponder over things such as the state of this nation when people choose to not spell ARSE correctly, nor do they proclaim ARSE with the same excitement and vitality as they should, but you see, we Dumpsters-in-exile are confounded by these arseclowns - and the odd arseclown-in-exile - to the point of being stumped.

Not stumped like the fields of felled trees out Buffalo State Pine Forest way, but stumped as in the proverbial state of unthinking confusion.

It's like Mike Whitney!

JE, your take?

 

Mikey Whitney!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?

 

Wow... The "in exile" fad. Can you expand upon it or shall we simply tease it out?

My take is simply this: any celebrity who has nothing going for themselves - such as dear Mike Whitney - declare themselves in exile, thus increasing their value to make a worthy comeback on national iq test shows and celebrity squares. I think it makes for exciting tv just to see how far they have fallen into a self-obsessed spiral from which woodchopping is their only saviour.

DAMNIT JE give us your wisdom...

 

The wisdom that is firm, or the wisdom of the infirm? THAT is this question.

- PoT, JCer-in-exile

 

As long as it involves firmness who really gives a damn?

Member of dumpfest 2002

 

Rogue_Product, you've heightened the clarity of vision in these hallowed halls of Mandalorian Prankism, and I thank you!

As for you, PoT, my fellow JCer-in-exile, you're question That is poses some serious questions to the younger set?

Are they doing things firmly or infirmly today? Are they applying their wisdom in an appropriate manner? Are they becoming members of the Young Liberals?

Are they playing Rugby League?

Serious questions PoT, but I have some alarming figures that suggest the younger set are not playing league! *SHOCK HORROR*

Rather, they're playing the Leaguers-in-exile alternative, a fad that is consuming the nation whilst the world's best gather in Melbourne for the big event! Yes, Dumpsters, it's professional wrestling! It's getting the kiddies in a stir, and though some of you may be of the opinion that that's not great, it is in fact very great. Why? because it's getting the younger set involved, and something which I'm very fond of, it's rearing out their passion!

I don't know about you PoT, but I sometimes feel the need to bash a mate to pieces, out of kindness more than anything else. It's a blokey sort of thing, and what's especially inspiring is that it draws us back to our primitive roots, where the simple things in life make dreams come true! Blokes and their fists, a harmless bit of fun!

You don't need an oval-shaped ball to get paid a ludicrous deal of money - just a bit of muscle and creativity, no coordination required. PoT, wrestling talks to kids, I'm sure you agree...

 

Wrestling!!! what ingenious JE. Why didnt we think of it before?


Wrestling is what the kids need. It's a bunch of ego-inflated morons running around beating the hell out of each other. Even better: it involves drugs, lots of drugs.

Drugs violence and neanderthal role models. What else do we need to get the kiddies involved (apart from the odd "chop" that is)?

JE, your wisdom has prevailed. I'm proud that Dumpfest has inspired such wonder. I just hope more take to our cause. PoT, what do you think of our new-found wonder that is wrestling?

 

Ah, what a world we live in!

*runs off to the naked hills*

 

This just gets more and more exciting:
Wrestling
Nudey runs to the hills
Pondering as to what "the hills" actually are




hold on



What's that stain? JE, can you solve the mystery of the stain?

 

I think you'd have to be a member of the Young Liberals to solve this riddle...I'm stumped.

 

Let it be known, that i will not impart my knowledge at this time. Please try again later

 

Damnit Marv, get into it. What about the wrestling - which is coincidently in town at the moment - surely you have an opinion on that?

 

What?

Women's mud wrestling?

 

Nyder, that is sexist and uncouth. We would never endorse such a thing on this thread....

*pause*






*falls of chair in hysterics, foaming at the mouth for a few seconds. Regains composure, still smirking*

Ok... maybe it's all good. But PoT can endorse it, not me. Damnit, wrestling is what we are aiming for. Big steroid-filled blokes who yell obsenities at each other only to have words like Arse "bleeped" out. We need this sort of thing for the kiddies if nothing else. Random violence with horrific consequences; but no swearing. What a wonderful world we live in.

 

wrestling, the last bastion of a truly healthy, normal childhood. they should have wrestling as a compulsory subject at school. none of this football, soccer, cricket rubbish. just run tag-team competitions in the gym. kids can let out all their frustrations via brutal physical violence and the schools would save money on infrastructure costs.

i agree, you'd have to repremand them for cussing though. breaking chairs over the heads of your co-students is one thing, but bad language is simply not acceptable.

 

It seems everyone has heeded our call, and gone forth to find a more sportive pursuit for their time!

Be it a chop, some league, or perhaps even charitable intent towards a worthy cause such as axe-less kiddies or terrorists-in-exile.

Speaking of which, I have hereby come out of exile, to rejoin the Dump after I put foward my 10 point plan. It seems Marv attempted to veto my rejoining unless it was on his terms, but the so called 'team of four' consisting of JE, Rogue Product, Nyder and Darth Antithesis managed to launch a surprise attack to oust him as leader of the young liberals.

And all power to them I say! Its what keeps politics interesting.

Speaking of interesting, it still amazes me how much fun can be derived from simply sitting at home, nearly midnight, and watching stupid, inane, SBS movies that don't quite make sense.

Like Steve Fosset!

JE, your take?

 

Whatever.

Supreme and absolute leadership has already been consitutionally vested in me, your little tricks are going to be the end of you, I tell you!

By the way...I've been lynched by an angry mod in the QLD Fan Force! Gasp!!!

 

I'm afraid that you, Marvin, are at the bottom of the heap when it comes to political power, however, you are on the right track. And now that you have shown me the way to the Liberal club (filled with economic students ) we can now help ourselves to consolidate power

And our new sweeping reforms may just include the controversial 'give the kiddies an axe' program or the 'save a terrorist foundation'....

But beware, fellow dumpers, for we are the next generation of political leaders, rising from the heap to effect the radical changes that we must bring in order to make our society one that will bring prosperity to all..

In Marvin's words: the new order is coming......

 

Wow! A lynch mob... Marv seems to be going up in the world.

*wipes nostalgic tear from his eye*

I think it's time we took over this leadership, Marv, I'm sorry but I'm going to have to stick my hand in the barrel and run for the leadership of the Young Liberals in QLD. Since I'm from Vic, it will be a challenge, but not entirely impossible... Who will vote for me?

 

Well, there are about 4 billion factions in the QLD division of the Liberals. Take your pic