The ***Official*** Edmontooine Joke thread... come on in for a laugh!!!!

LMAO

Three guys walk into a bar...



















The forth one ducks!

lol took me a sec, but I got it.

How does Snoop Dog keep all his white clothes there whitest?




















He uses lots of Blee-awtch!

Come on people! This is funny stuff!!!

One day a snail was plodding along the road when he saw the rest of his animal friends running quickely everywhere. This made him sad and feel left out.

One day he went to a car dealership. He looked at some cars and saw one that said "X" on the side. The Salesman didn't want to lose this unique opprotunity to sell a car to a snail, so for a small fee the Dealership put "S" on the side. The snail wanted that because now his animal friends would know it was him driving the car.

He sped out of the dealership and down the road by the rest of his animal friends. As he went by, they all exclaimed, "Look at that S car go"

*sigh* Cute, Real Cute.

We have got to make an effort to keep this on the front page, I hate having to go looking for it.

Not so much of a joke as just funny to anyone who has ever been part of a Yahoo group (well I thought it was funny but then I'm in way to many of those groups):

HOW MANY LIST MEMBERS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT
BULB?

One to change the light bulb and to post that the
light bulb has been changed.

Fourteen to share similar experiences of changing
light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been
changed differently.

Seven to caution about the dangers of changing light
bulbs.

Seven more to point out spelling/grammar errors in
posts about changing light bulbs.

Five to flame the spell checkers.

Three to correct spelling/grammar flames.

Six to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light
bulb" ... another six to condemn those six as stupid.

Fifteen to claim experience in the lighting industry
and give the correct spelling.

Nineteen to post that this group is not about light
bulbs and to please take this discussion to a
lightbulb (or light bulb) forum.

Eleven to defend the posting to the group saying that
we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are
relevant to this group.

Thirty-six to debate which method of changing light
bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs,
what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique
and what brands are faulty.

Seven to post URLs where one can see examples of
different light bulbs.

Four to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly and
then post the corrected URL.

Three to post about links they found from the URLs
that are relevant to this group, which makes light
bulbs relevant to this group.

Thirteen to link all posts to date, quote them in
their entirety including all headers and signatures,
and add "Me too"

Five to post to the group that they will no longer
post because they cannot handle the light bulb
controversy.

Four to say "didn't we go through this already a short
time ago?"

Thirteen to say "do a Goggle search on light bulbs
before posting questions about light bulbs"

Three to tell a funny story about their cat and a
light bulb.

AND

one group lurker to respond to the original post 6
months from now and start it all over again.

One day a Women got on a bus with her baby. The bus driver said:" That is one ugly baby!" Now, the women went to her seat without saying anything. The man beside her noticed how upset she was. "What's the mater?" He asked her. "The driver offended me. He made me very upset." She replied. "Well, that goes against all City standards. If you report him he could get fired. Now you should go up there and ask for an apology or else you will report him. And while you are up there, I will hold your monkey."

Unfortunately I think I've met that baby, but she's cute as a bug now.

This one's better than the kettle, I couldn't breath after a while I was laughing that much.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=8335653541#description

did you read the Q & A's

Q: I would like to be tough, gay or a rock star. Do you think purchasing and subsequently donning these trousers will help?
A: Probably not if you call them 'trousers.' A true rockstar would say 'pants' or 'duds' or something more rock-star-y, like 'ladykillers.'
I loved that one and the Maserati one.