JCC The Panda Immortality Thread

Of course, you could just move to Colorado, it's the done thing there.

http://www.kcra.com/article/jogger-...wanted-for-defecating-in-front-yards/12273141

 

'The Mad Pooper'

 

i never got the appeal of immortality.

i'm only in my twenties, and i already know that i'm gonna be sick of living one day. who the **** wants to do this forever. and especially as a ****ing panda

 

Being a panda might help address your underlying anger issues.

 

She's not the one with ****ing anger issues, squire.

 

Things go along pretty well until about 5 billion years from now when the sun expands into a red giant and kills all other life on the planet except for me. Granted, being a panda doesn't make it any worse.

 

Then you can be space panda.

 

i don't have anger issues. it's just anger.

 

I would have a friend with a spaceship, we would just go to another star system.

 

.starfish has a plan.

 

Well, you and Plastic Man. Unless I dreamed it, I think it was Ramza that covered this recently?

 

Plastic Man?

 

it's interesting that you bring up red giants because those are both kinds of pandas. okay, see you guys later.

 

Wocky, how would you even know what pain feels like?

You're telling me that given the opportunity to transcend the ones and zeroes and feel the joy of fresh soil underfoot, fresh snow in the air, and the crispness of a mountain stream, you would rather not open the pod bay doors?

Typical. This is why humanity will prevail.

 

tom

I didn't know that.

A whole new level of complexity has been brought to this thread.

 

Yeah he'd be able to keep you company. I think this actually solves the Plastic Man dilemma because now we know he'd get to hang out with a sentient panda, albeit one with horrible burn scars.

 

tom is fake newsing us. The so called red panda is really just a Chinese mountain raccoon.

 

No, that's no longer an issue, if you bothered to pay attention. in 5 billions years the sun is turning into a Red Panda/Giant Panda hybrid. It sounds rather delightful.

 

Glad I am not the only one on google, trying to locate this infamous red panda

 

Immortal panda means god-like status without crucifixion.

 

Wocky has posted here though, do we need to? Isn't it a given?

 

I'd like to think that the endgame for all life on earth will be sentient ginger raccoons.