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The Path to Glory

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Rhia, Apr 29, 2000.

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  1. Rhia

    Rhia Jedi Youngling

    Apr 21, 2000
    Seven year old Arian Drake leaned over the crib of her newborn sister, Leanna. She brushed dark hair away from her face, and observed that her hair, like Leanna's, had reddish highlights. Only Leanna's hair was softer, golder.

    Are you the one I saw in my dream? Arian wondered. The Queen from all my story books? The one in the myth? She reached out a small hand to brush her sister's soft red-gold hair.

    "Arian, you little beast. Get away from Leanna, you'll just give her germs." Lady Drake swept into the nursery and picked Leanna up.

    Leanna's eyes flew open, and Arian immeadiately noticed that they were turqoise-blue, the same color of eyes that the girl in her dream had. Leanna's eyes locked with hers for a faint moment, and Leanna smiled.

    Arian smiled back. Yes, she thought exhuberently. This is why I'm being trained in the Elite. Here is the Queen I will serve.
  2. Jedi Milan-Kenobi

    Jedi Milan-Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jan 7, 2000
    That was way too short...and maybe you will actually finish this story on line....yes?? Maybe??
    Great start though!
  3. Jedi_Hood

    Jedi_Hood Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Feb 10, 2000
    You've caught my interest! This seems like it will be quite interesting. It might be a good idea to give us a little background on the characters, though.
  4. Rhia

    Rhia Jedi Youngling

    Apr 21, 2000
    "On Benal 3, the ruler is the Queen. Our current Queen is Nephira. But there are sects that not even Nephira can control. The Priests, for example. They control the most basic, primal parts of our planet. They know the most important things about us."

    Twelve year old Leanna stared up at her sister. "You've never told me any of this before," she said quietly. "Well, the part about Nephira I knew, but not about the Priests. Why are you telling me now, Arian?"

    Nineteen year old Arian smiled. "Because the Priests have summoned you to the Temple. They will tell you the one thing that will affect your life-forever." How long had she waited for this day to come? Since Leanna was born? No, earlier than that. Much earlier. Since she'd learned to tap the memories, it felt as if she'd been waiting for over five hundred years.

    The expression on Leanna's face was carefully neutral as she weighed her sister's words. "What will they tell me?" she asked.

    "You true Name."
  5. Jedi Milan-Kenobi

    Jedi Milan-Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jan 7, 2000
    Just wait where this ends up! I have read this fanfic and it is truely awesome!
  6. Rhia

    Rhia Jedi Youngling

    Apr 21, 2000
    I'm not going to pace, Arian told herself sternly. She really wanted to pace back and forth, releasing some of the nervousness she felt.

    What Name would the Priests tell Leanna was her own? Her true Name? Leanna had to be the one, the Queen.

    A passerby would scarcely have noticed her, Arian was so still. It took all of her control and willpower to lean casually against the Temple's walls, and act as if this were nothing important.

    Oh yes, nothing important indeed. Only the day she'd waited for, hoped for, prayed for, and bled for. The day of confirmation. The day that would either confirm or crush her hopes.

    Leanna exited the Temple looking shaken. "Arian..."

    "What did he tell you?" Arian asked gently.

    "He told me not to tell anyone. He told me that to do so was to give them power over me."

    Arian snorted. As if anyone could control you, she thought.

    Leanna studied her sister. "He said my name was Alaramedar. The true Queen."

    Arian held back tears of relief, raising her eyebrows as her only reaction. The Elite members who trained her would have been proud. "Then I was right all along," she said. "Follow me, we have things to pick up."

    Leanna followed her sister back through the winding streets of the market, noting how Arian carried the heavy basket with ease, moved with assurance she shouldn't have had. Leanna felt only bewilderment. What did all of this mean? Why didn't Arian tell her?

    Arian didn't tell her until they reached the house their parents own. Arian closed the door of her room, and locked it. She carefully set the packages on the floor. They were still wrapped, so Leanna didn't have a clue as to what they were. "I've kept these for you, for a very long time," Arian said slowly. "Go ahead, unwrap them."

    Cautiously, carefully, Leanna opened one of the packages, then another. The things wrapped inside of the brown paper amazed her, as well as baffled her. A scepter, a coronet, a stiletto, a necklace, and a ring. All shining silvery, but there was a hint of something more there. They had a dragon design set in them, a white opal dragon, breathing fire opal flames. "Arian," Leanna said slowly. "Why are these for me? Where did you get these? What are they made out of?"

    "They're made frome zulejo."

    Zulejo. "I thought that was a myth," Leanna said. It dated back to the time when the Queen was said to have walked Benal 3. Zulejo, the sacred metal, was said to be able to withstand incredible temperatures, even lightsaber blows. It was nearly indestructable.

    "There are a lot of things that are myths, but are also real," Arian said. She sounded as if she were choosing her words carefully.

    Leanna stared at her sister as if she were crazy as understanding dawned on her. Her sister had to be crazy. "You think I'm some myth? The Queen in the prophecies?"

    "I know you are."

    "You," Leanna said, more than slightly panicked, "are absolutely crazy."

    "Undeniable so," Arian agreed. "But I'm telling the truth. You are the fulfillment of the prophecy. You're the Queen who is going to bring Bennal 3 away from corruption, and on the path to Glory."

    Leanna couldn't deny that somewhere deep inside, she believed her sister was telling the truth. Arian had never lied to her. Not once, in the twelve years she'd known her. She couldn't deny the ring of truth in her sister's words. She bit her lip, unwilling to accept what she knew to be true. Leanna bowed her head, accepting Arian's words.

    "Leanna?" Arian asked. She sounded worried. "Are you alright?"

    Something that was more than Leanna stared out of Leanna's eyes, shaking Arian to the bone. "I am fine. And I am here." This was not Leanna speaking. This was the Queen. This was Alaramedar.

    Arian bowed her head, in respect, in revereance. "I am Alavian, Queen. It means "the Queen's hand." And I am here to serve as a protector."

    Leanna's voice was midnight ice on a summer lake. "Fight well, Alavian. Because there is something so large coming, that even your skills may not be able to help you survive i
  7. Rhia

    Rhia Jedi Youngling

    Apr 21, 2000
    Leanna sat on the balcony outside of her room, thinking. Me? The Queen from the prophecies? I think I would have known if I were her! But she did know, and that was the problem. All her life, there had been part of her that was different from the other people she knew. Leanna had always had a way of speaking when she had to make others listen, that would make them shiver, or instantly obey. This was evidence that she might be the Queen. I need more evidence, more proof, Leanna thought desperately. Her mind brought forth more. How about how powerful she was where Skill was concerned? Part of Leanna still wanted to deny what Arian had told her. It wasn't because she was afraid, or in denial. It was because she didn't want to be the one to bear the responsibility for ruining another's life. A Queen, a good Queen, had loyalty and respect, two things that could be used against her subjects if the wrong choices were made.

    "I don't want to hurt other people," Leanna whispered to the night sky. "I don't want them hurt because they believe I'm the Queen."

    But what about those who've already been hurt? her mind asked her. You could help those who Nephira has hurt. You could protect them, like you're supposed to.

    There were so many little checks and balances. So many things that she could do to make a difference, to change things for the better....

    ...If she accepted the responsibility.

    Leanna called in the scepter Arian had given her. It appeared in her hands moments later, and she studied it carefully. Sighing against the inevitable, Leanna fixed her eyes on the brightest star she could find. "I accept the responsibility now," she said softly. "I am the Queen. I believe that. But please..." her voice took on a pleading note. "don't make me have to do this alone. I'm scared, and I need help."
  8. Jedi Milan-Kenobi

    Jedi Milan-Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jan 7, 2000
    Great...absolutely great!
  9. Jedi Milan-Kenobi

    Jedi Milan-Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jan 7, 2000
    I am the ghost of Rhia's thread. She WILL post! She MUST post!
  10. Jedi Milan-Kenobi

    Jedi Milan-Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jan 7, 2000
  11. Rhia

    Rhia Jedi Youngling

    Apr 21, 2000
    Milan, if you put 'Fire and Ice' on every website from here to Tokyo I swear I will-um, well, maybe I better not say that. Anyway, here's more.

    Jedi Knight Zanshin Jinn was twenty-one, and currently on a cruiser headed for Benal 3. It was his second mission without his Master or an older Jedi along with him, and he was still young enough to enjoy the freedom. He examined the debriefing disk on Benal 3 the Council had given him. It was his job to see whether or not Benal 3 was fit to joing the Galactic Senate.

    There was little known about the people of Benal 3, but what they did know was incredible. The people of Benal 3 used something they called Skill. It was rather like the Force, but not exactly. Hei-Shin doubted it was truly the Force. Otherwise the people would be dangerous. With so many, it would be easy for dozens to turn to the Dark side and wreak havoc across the universe. Also, they were all telepaths, that in itself was incredible.

    And another thing. They had some ability to make a certain type of metal almost indestructable. It would even (it was rumored) withstand lightsaber blows. Amazing.

    "Jedi Jinn, we're ready to land."

    Zanshin nodded. That was fine with him. The cruiser landed smoothly.

    "Jedi Jinn?" A man asked.


    "I'm to take you to Sir Drake's home. You'll be staying with him."

    Zanshin studied the man. He was tall, gray eyed. Only his eyes were slitted, just like a cats. That fit the description of the Benalian people that he'd read. "Is it far from here?" he asked mildly.

    "No." His guide seemed disinclined to talk.

    Zanshin tried again. "Do you work for Mr. Drake?"

    "Sir Drake. And yes, I do." The man lengthened his stride, and Zanshin gave up on trying to converse. Instead, he studied the buildings they walked past. Some were large, some were small, all were artfully decorated. Zanshin thought to himself that they seemed more like elaborate and tasteful museums, not living places. They stopped in front of a large-large? Very large-house. Mansion would have been a better word. It was just as tastefully decorated as the rest of the buildings he had seen. Sweeping stone columns, blue-grey marble tiles, potted plants and an elaborately carved door. Stained glass windows with fantastical designs were everywhere. The place reeked of wealth.

    I can't believe people actually live here, Zanshin thought. Talk about over decorating.

    "If you'll follow me." It was a demand phrased as a request. Hei-Shin shrugged it off as he opened his senses to the Force, scanning for danger. "These will be your rooms," the man said.

    Rooms? Plural? For just me? Zanshin wondered. Oh, well, it's best not to offend. "Thank you. This is very generous."

    "Sir Drake and his wife will meet you at dinner. It will be served at 6:00. They send their regrets for not being able to meet you personally." And with that, the man was gone.

    Zanshin studied his rooms. They were beautiful, to a certain extent. But somehow they seemed cold. Zanshin glanced at his chronometer, 3:14. There was plenty of time to get cleaned up and go exploring. He dressed in clean clothes, then set out to see the rest of the house.
  12. Ejedir

    Ejedir Jedi Youngling star 1

    Apr 16, 2000
    So, when exactly does this story take place? Awesome story line, great writing. Keep posting more. I patiently(or maybe not so patiently) await the next post.
  13. Jedi Milan-Kenobi

    Jedi Milan-Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jan 7, 2000
    You go from Zanshin to Hei-Shin? But great Job
  14. Rhia

    Rhia Jedi Youngling

    Apr 21, 2000
    Okay, in answer to Ejedir's question, this fic takes place before pretty much everything happens, but not quite before Yoda. This predate's Anakin, Obi-Wan, and Qui-Gon. In response to Milan's statement, I was typing this off of a fanfic I'd written before, and I was changing the name. Sorry.

    One more note, I'm not sure whether or not this is true, but I've read fanfics where Jedi have telepathic capabilites. They do here, hope no one objects. //\\ is my way of showing telepathy. *********************************************
    Zanshin explored the house. It was full of a cold grace, everything was placed perfectly and seemingly for a reason. It was unnerving. On a table there were holo's of a family. He assumed that the man and woman were Sir Drake and his wife, but who were the two girls? No one had said that his host had children. Of course, then again, no one had told him anything about his host. He was taking all of this on blind faith. Zanshin found himself hoping that whoever they were, the girls would be somewhere else.

    No such luck. He found one of the girls in the very next room. She was a girl of about twelve standard years. She had her back to him, and was humming a pleasant tune. When she sensed his presence, she turned and gave a telepathic shriek that made his ears ring.

    "Who are you? How did you get in here?" she demanded.

    "My name is-" Zanshin was knocked head over heels-and no one had touched him. He went flying into the wall and hit it with a groan. Zanshin clutched at his head, the girl had shrieked again and it was giving him a headache. His vision swam.

    Something sharp and pointed was being pressed against his throat, not quite hard enough to draw blood. "I should kill you," someone growled.

    "Oh, would you?" Zanshin asked hopefully. "At least then the ringing in my ears would stop." What ever was at his throat dug in deep enough to draw blood.

    "Who are you?"

    "Jedi Knight Zanshin Jinn. Who are you?" he asked. His vision cleared and he focused on his attacker and interrogator. It was a girl. She was holding something like a broadsword at his throat. She also, Zanshin noticed, wasn't wearing very much. It looked like she'd been headed for the 'fresher.

    "Arian. Arian Drake. Why did you scare my sister?"

    "Your sister?" Oh. So she was the other girl in the picture. Well, this was a lovely start. "Is that who she is? I didn't mean to."

    "He startled me, Ari'. I don't think he meant any harm."

    Arian glanced at the other girl. Zanshin took advantage of her distraction and used the Force to remove the broadsword from her grasp, and surged to his feet, flicking on his lightsaber.

    "Nice trick, Zanshin," Arian said, mocking. "But it's one of the easiest ones in the lexicon." She dropped to the ground, kicked his legs out from underneath him, and held both her sword and his lightsaber. She turned the lightsaber off after a moments study and dropped it on his chest. "I don't trust you," she said flatly. "Care for a re-match?"

    "Arian! What are you doing?"

    "Seeing if our honored guest is really a Jedi," Arain snapped. "Stay out of this Leanna."

    Zanshin stood up carefully. He couldn't help it, he gave Arian a brief, approving glance. She looked like she could handle her sword. "Don't you want to put something else on?" he suggested.

    "Nah. I'd hate to get it dirty if I have to carve out your liver."

    Zanshin ignited his lightsaber and shifted into the "defense" position. "You're awfully sure of yourself."

    Arian smiled. With the way her eyes were slitted grey-green, it reminded Zanshin of a large, predatory feline's smile. "I'm deadlier than you are."
  15. Jedi Milan-Kenobi

    Jedi Milan-Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jan 7, 2000
    Tehehe...yup she's deadlier than he is.
  16. Jedi Milan-Kenobi

    Jedi Milan-Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jan 7, 2000

    Post you! I command that you post! post post post post post post post post post post post post post post post post post post post post post post post post...
  17. Jedi Milan-Kenobi

    Jedi Milan-Kenobi Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jan 7, 2000
  18. Rhia

    Rhia Jedi Youngling

    Apr 21, 2000
    TaDa! Here I am. Yeah, I know, I know. It took me long enough. (Sorry Milan.)
    "I won't use Skill if you won't use the Force," Arian offered.

    Zanshin grinned. "I seriously doubt this Skill could stand up the the Force anyways. But, agreed." Zanshin swung, Arian blocked. "Are you going to kick me again?"

    "I won't if you won't."

    They swung and blocked, attacked and defended. Zanshin discovered that Arian was very much an in-your-face type of fighter.


    Arian leaped backwards and the broadsword disappeared. Zanshin had to remind himself not to gape. How did she do that? "Hello Father, Mother."

    "What are you doing? Attacking our honored guest? And why in blazing Hades aren't you wearing any clothes?"

    "I am wearing clothes. And I don't suppose you'd believe me if I said I was making a statement?"

    "Try again," the man, Zanshin assumed he was Sir Drake, sounded as if he were speaking through gritted teeth.

    "I must beg some pardon," he ventured politely. "Arian only came to Leanna's defense. I'm afraid I startled her."

    "There's no need to take any blame, Jedi Jinn. Arian behaves like this all the time."

    "Do you?" Zanshin asked. Arian gave a curt nod. Zanshin grinned. "Well then, it seems I've found a kindred spirit. I do too."

    //Do you always talk like that?\\ Arian asked. The mind contact startled him.

    //Are you always this ungrateful\\ Zanshin shot back. //I'm trying to get you out of trouble.\\

    //Thanks. I think.\\ Arian said something to her father before turning on her heel and leaving, with Leanna trailing after her.

    "I really must apologize. Arian's behaviour-"

    Zanshin held up a hand. "It was nothing," he said firmly, putting just a little Force behind it. "I was not offended."

    Sir Draked nodded. "Yes, you're right," he said agreeably. "I'll see you at dinner."

    Zanshin headed back for his rooms to wash away the blood from the small cut. He eyed his reflection in the mirror and had to grin. It looked like his stay here would be interesting. He felt like a padawan again he was having so much fun.
  19. Jaycen_Kayde

    Jaycen_Kayde Jedi Youngling star 2

    May 14, 2000
    I just finished watching "Legacy of the Jedi", which was excellent by the way, but I had a question. Sometimes, when I am doing a lightsaber scene, when we hold the blades still they tend to be a bit jumpy from frame to frame. In Legacy and many other fan films, the blades seem to be totally sturdy. I am using photoshop to do the blades, so is it just a matter of paying more attention to my work ?

  20. lokmer

    lokmer Jedi Padawan star 4

    Mar 15, 2000
    Yeah, it is just a question of practice, but there are a couple of things you can do to make it easier
    1) Draw a line on the saber prop (if there is a good size difference between your blade width and your hilt width, just use the hilt lip) and use it as your reference point for where the blade starts.

    2) Keep the glow width and length as tight as possible (striping the blade with electrical tape helps a lot in this regard).

    Also, remember that flicker is part of lightsabers. The blades in the OT flickered a lot, even in ROTJ, and the blades in TPM flickered some (not quite as much, though).
    A certain amount is forgivable, even expected. After all, a totally flicker-free saber would look cartoony.
  21. Jean

    Jean Jedi Youngling star 1

    Oct 7, 2003
    Upping for the move
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