"The Pint Of No Return" Pub v5.0

Where's Jon? I need a coffee .

Inexperienced new barmen

 

I agree
You should not apply for a position if you cant be there to fulfill it when needed


goes into stock cupboard and brings out new RobobarmanMark5

There, that should work

 

Yeah until someone blows it to pieces!

 

*Brandishes bazooka*

Coffee now, Robo-Barman! Baz need coffee!!

 

We need to liven this place up

Play something with a funky tune

 

Anyone unpacked my jukebox/timemachine yet?

 

Yes, it was rushed in straight away when the pub opened

I used it yesterday

 

Morning...

Not often I utter that word 'Morning'

 

Nik?
Have you even been to bed yet?

 

Oh yes, I went early last night too (well 3am) but I'm waiting on some stuff in the mail so I couldn't sleep after about 7am so I got up because if I didn't the buggers would knock and run off before I got to the door as always then I'd have to wait about 3 weeks before they bothered to try and deliver it again... I'm not bitter about the Royal Mail... HONEST

 

Why don't you just go to the post office collection depot and pick it up yourself?
You cannot trust these people.
They claimed they had delivered a package to me once, I argued for months and in the end won some compensation. It was a DVD.
Anyway, months later I was cutting the hedge and there it was. The had stuffed it in the hedge near the front door??????????
Morons.

 

I see

Well, since you're here Nic, what drink are you having?

 

Well because it would cost me about £10 to get a taxi there and back and I've already paid about that much in postage.. and it's their job

They're bloody stupid round here, my dad keeps getting packages (of stuff that's supposed to be signed for like £1000 of antique silver) left by the backdoor RIGHT next to the bins... one day the bin men are going to mistake it for rubbish and take it away!! He has told them a million times NOT to leave stuff there but frequently comes home to stuff there... they even put it BEHIND the bins to hide it!

Richie I'll have an OJ please

 

gives Nic an OJ


Remind me to send Royal Mail something unpleasant

 

How about a box full of my old work socks?

 

Hmmm, possibly
I was thinking more of a laughing gas bomb

But socks work to

 

Do you think it would go to the right address though hmmm???

 

Mine would.
But then someone may get seriously hurt.

*Puts socks back in lead lined container*

Lets keep these under lock and key until really needed*

 

Yes, I think thats sensible

 

Hello there!

 

Hey Sid.

Cherryade?

 

Mmm please JJ.

How's you this fine day?

 

*Wanders in and takes a seat at the bar*

How are you fine folk doing today? Just popped in from Perth, Oz and I must say, what a fine victory by the England boys to regain the Ashes. I'm a huge cricket fan, but not of the Aussies. Bout time they lost a series.

So, what's the speciality in this place? I want the best and finest cocktail available

 

All the better when I go home from work in 1 hour 10 minutes and counting.