The Protectors of Liberty (the young life of Qui-Gon Jinn)

I have finished three large fan fiction stories and am currently working on a fouth. These stories are collectivly known as the "Jedi Knight" series, which chronicles the young life of Qui-Gon Jinn. These stories are not like most fan fiction on the net, they do not have alot of deep thought or great works of literary art. These are stories that I think are fun to read and remind me of the Star Wars movies. Don't be concerned if you think the story has a poor plot and chunky diologue, becuase it does, but what Star Wars movie doesn't?

This is the first three chapters (there is 18 chapters) and note that these three chapters don't have to do with Qui-Gon Jinn, but he will appear in Chapter 4. So, sit back and take a few minutes to read a few chapters of Star Wars Jedi Knight I: The Protectors of Liberty.

 

Here is the story.......
Chapter 1:

Zi Tacklen watched as the hiss of soft red laser fire penetrated through the stale air in the long hallway. The hall was massive and well illuminated. Its flat gray walls were blackened with the marks of many lasers.

The hallway was one of many that filled the ship, a large Dresselian transport called the Expedition. It had been returning to Coruscant from the Outer Rim Territory of Klatooine when Togorian pirates attacked it.

Zi Tacklen stood in a doorway on the left side of the hall hiding from the Togorians who were blasting their way from the hangar bay.

He reached up and pulled his hood off his head. He slowly shifted his long brown hair over his shoulder. An accomplished Jedi Knight, Zi Tacklen was in his early forties. He had experienced countless life threatening situations and had been through many similar situations.

He concentrated hard, using the Force he communicated with his apprentice. He had to use the Force in order to avoid the Togorians hearing him. His apprentice stood in a doorway on the opposite side of the hall, waiting for a command.

His apprentice was nearly twenty-six, at the end of his Jedi training. He was a well-built, handsome man with dark hair and green eyes. His name was Shack-Tah Kath. Shack-Tah had been his apprentice for over ten years, and in that time, Shack-Tah and Zi had grown close. They trusted each other with everything. The bond between master and apprentice was great. Zi was sad to see his friend leave, yet proud to see his apprentice become a Jedi Knight.

Zi summoned the Force, allowing his apprentice to hear him. Shack-Tah, the Togorians can?t see us. I will move first, and then you follow. The apprentice gazed at his Master and nodded to show his acceptance of the order.

The Togorians were large hairy creatures, twice the size of a man. Their eyes were mere glowing green slits. They were some the most fearsome predators in the galaxy and were known by all species to be lethal.

Zi tightened his body and mind. He could hear the Togorians begin to lumber down the hall. The two Jedi could hear the sound of their breath creeping closer. At the right moment, Zi stepped out and activated his lightsaber. He trusted it?s green blade forward and ran it right through the chest of a Togorian. It howled in pain for a moment and fell in a heap. Shack-Tah somersaulted out of the doorway and deflected several shots from the blasters, spun and sliced off a Togorian arm.

Three more Togorians burst through the door and started firing. Saliva dripping from their long fangs and light bouncing off their black armor, the creatures charged forward blasting at the Jedi.
Shack-Tah marched forward twirling his lightsaber. He deflected six shots and leaped into the air, somersaulted and landed behind the Togorians. He trusted his saber forward through the chest of the Togorian. It screamed and around the wound, the black armor glowed orange. Simultaneously Zi swung and decapitated the same Togorian before Shack-Tah could pull his saber from its body.

Zi spun in a circle and deflected several shots. Realizing their defeat the Togorians retreated through the damaged hangar bay door. Zi and Shack-Tah watched as their fur disappeared into the smoke behind the passage. Shack-Tah slowly shifted his head from left to right examining the floor.

?This is worse than I thought,? Shack-Tah broke the silence. Zi sighed and crouched to one knee.

?We must contact the bridge and inform them of our whereabouts and our situation,? the Jedi Master said slowly, cocking his head to see his apprentice. Shack-Tah nodded.

Zi wiped the sweat from his forehead. From his tunic, he retrieved a small projector. He placed it on the floor and turned it on. A miniature hologram of the ship?s commander, Dakkla?na, appeared.

Dakkla?na was a young Pemposian, a race of creatures from the planet of Nogah. He wore battle fatigues, tight leather-like material with a grayish hue. His smooth skin wa

 

Does everyone think that three chapters is too long to post? Or is everybody not interested. A little help here.

 

Just bumbing this up to get a bit more attention. I only got two replies so far, and hope to recieve more.

 

Please oh please oh PLEASE! Post more! That was SO *GOOD*! I loved it!
Uppers!