Before The Qui-Gon Jinn Challenge Thread : New Challenge **Qui-Gon as a kid ** updated 5/8/05

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by dianethx, Sep 19, 2004.

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  1. Princess_Arulmozhi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 16, 2004
    star 4
    My 'little' bit...which started out being little, and then became something else, as usual :D At any rate, it should delight Kyn. I never knew writing Dooku could be this fun - and this the first I've written him :)

    I think Kyn and Layren came up with 'Yan'... :) - if so, 'Yan' belongs to...er...them. :D .

    *************

    Lord of the Light


    Creche Master Elliyaé would kill him.

    Well, perhaps not. Crèche-masters, particularly Jedi Crèche-masters did not go about killing people, especially errant initiates. Even initiates who, instead of meditating, or spending ?productive time? with fellow initiates, slipped out of the crèche, toddled along long, narrow corridors towards large rooms that seemed to have no walls or ceiling.

    They did have walls and ceilings?it was just that he could not see them too well. He was too small.

    Initiate Qui-Gon Jinn, approximately three standard years old, held himself tightly to the railings that ran along one side of the training salle, gripping the metal until his small fingers ached. He thrust out his lower lip slightly, feeling slightly guilty about his escapade. He had not lied, strictly speaking?but he had not told her the truth, either, about talking to...

    ?whoever the knight was, who was sparring with his sabre in a corner of the salle.

    Qui-Gon didn?t know his name, but he had been struck by the sight of the young knight and his light-sabre, when he had first seen him performing a ka?kat?katé? No. he pursed his lips, trying to remember the word. Something with a ?ka? sound. The knight had been practising that, he had heard one of the masters say so, to a batch of senior pada?pad?padwuns. He and the other initiates of his age had been brought on an excursion of sorts by the Crèche-master to this very salle?their first introduction to the world of Jedi knights. They hadn?t been allowed to wander much?in fact, not at all?but Qui-Gon had not felt like wandering, in any case. He had sat on one of the large spectator seats, entranced by the sights of so many knights, and?ah?padwuns, and their light ?sticks?. Master Elliyaé had told him, much later, that they were called ?sabres?.

    Among those he had watched, then, with great interest, had been?this knight. The one who was practicing with his light stick?no, sabre, now. Even to his inexperienced, crèche-ling eyes, the knight had seemed better than most around him. He didn?t know why. He knew nothing much about light-sti?sabres, after all. But this knight was good.

    He shook his head, and turned his eyes towards the knight again?only to find that he had gone.

    Qui-Gon blinked. His heart lurched with a surge of disappointment, and he bit his lip again, trying to ?be at peace?, as Master Elliyaé often said?she always seemed to be telling him that. Where had the knight gone? He had hoped to go to him?though he was very nervous?and talk to him. Or watch the knight and his sabre closely. Qui-Gon looked to where the knight had been sparring?and saw something that caught his interest at once.

    The knight had left behind his light-sabre.

    There it was, lying by the corner of the square boundary within which he had seen knights sparring?laid on his brown cloak.

    Qui-Gon stared at the object, fascinated. It was not too large; not as large as he had seen, the first day. Why? That day, he had seen blue and green light from it; now it had no light. Why not?

    The little initiate slipped down from his vantage point, and tiptoed towards the centre of the salle, his little boots making a slight tapping noise?it was completely empty, by some strange chance. He stopped at the edge of the cloak, staring down at the beautiful silver and black object, lying as still as one of the little jelwe puppies he had befriended a month ago. Not quite the same colours, perhaps. But very?

    ??pwetty.? He murmured, as he bent, small fingers reaching out for the object.

    Then he paused, remembering all the words of caution about not touching something that didn?t belong to him. But he
  2. Kynstar Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2004
    star 5
    Awwww! [face_love] How sweet was that!! I'm blubbering here! [face_blush] Great job! Totally was awesome! Loved how Yoda kept stopping Dooku from getting his saber! =D= Well done!

    Little Qui was so cute too! Excellent on the descriptions and wordage there as well! :D

    That lil fic juz made my day! *Warm fuzzies* Thanks!
  3. darshaassant Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 13, 2005
    star 2
    Ahahahaa... wondered what would have happened if things had gone wrong... I like the baby language too!
  4. BrokenNoseOfQui-Gon Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 15, 2004
    star 2
    I think everyone is quite inspired by the image of Qui-Gon as a child! [face_laugh]
  5. maychorian Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2005
    star 4
    That was perfectly lovely. Of course Qui-Gon was an extraordinary toddler! I liked the way he thought of the Force as being the "bigger" part of himself.

    Dooku was cool, too. Great job!
  6. Alethia Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 13, 2005
    star 5
    Aww...so sweet. I loved the Dooku Qui interaction at the end. And Qui with a lightsaber sounded just so adorable... Great, Princess. Loved it.
  7. Mistress_Renata Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Sep 9, 2000
    star 4
    Darn it, Princess? What did I say about my "w" key? That was very sweet. I like Dooku giving him his first saber lessons. I'm wondering now if his new "friend" will take him back or if a frantic creche master will come searching for him!

    Who else? Anyone? Anyone?
  8. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    I'm so far behind in my comments... sorry everyone!

    LukesTheMan The mouseling was adorable and I could so picture Qui-Gon being intent on protecting the little thing. Good job with this. Lovely portrayal of a kid!

    Layren I loved that Dooku was trying to protect Qui-Gon yet again. And that he told Qui that he liked him. Must have made the little kid feel 10 feet tall.
    Good job and I look forward to many more!


    Princess_A Loved that Qui-Gon was so intent on trying the saber that he almost cut off something important. I could just picture the little kid staring at the saber and trying to pick it up, just to see. LOL on him thinking that Padawan Dooku was a Knight. Very funny and something a little kid would do. Hope to see more.
  9. Princess_Arulmozhi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 16, 2004
    star 4
    Lukestheman - wonderful viggie about Qui and a mouseling - especially where he struggles against 'Tiri, to get down and help it. Another great insight into the great master. :)

    Layren: Cute little vig, about Qui and Dooku. Ah, love the mush [face_love]

    Kyn: Yay...glad you liked it so much (I knew you would - especially when Count Dooku would not stick to...er...original specifications, and began to assume greater importance. That man has a 'presence', I swear.) Warm fuzzies, indeed :D . Glad you liked little Qui too. Thanks so much [:D]

    darshaassant: <shudders> If something had gone wrong...one luscious Jedi master minus the nose, I suppose. Gah, doesn't bear thinking about (considering all the 'broken nose' fics abounding). Am I glad you like the language - since I've no idea about how English-speaking children talk, at that age...I had to go by guess.

    BrokenNoseOfQui-Gon: Qui-gon inspires, whatever age he happens to be [face_laugh]

    maychorian: Thank you - Qui-Gon was good in everything - including being a toddler :D

    Alethia: <grin> Thanks so much. Glad you liked it.

    Mistress_Renata: <presents M_R with brand-new, un-erasable 'W' key> There you go. :D I think Qui's new friend would brave irate creche-masters...and lead him back to the fold :D Thank you!

    dianethx Love your comments - especially about Qui trying to pick the sabre. :D

  10. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    I am locking this thread because I'm having RL issues and can't keep it up by myself. Layren and I will be sharing responsibilities in the new thread.

    If you still want to respond to any of the wonderful stories on this thread, please go to the new thread and post there.

    The continuing challenge thread can be found on Qui-Gon Jinn Challenge Thread


    Thanks.
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