Beyond - Legends ~ The reason I didn't update...~ finished on ff.n, part II started

My mind ground to a halt as I carefully reread that, but it was definitely a fiancée, former since his Admiralship got himself exiled.

The piano started to get on my nerves. But all the files I opened contained the same kind of music. It took me a while to get the idea of opening another folder in which I found what sounded to be traditional songs. They were difficult to understand, because if leaving syllables out to build sentences, it was even more legal to leave out bits that were supposed to be there to fit metre and rhythm. I was still trying to understand a word of it, when my pad chimed in. Time to move my sorry butt to his Admiralship. I sighed. He always pops up in the most opportune times

Stepping into the dimly lit art museum did not feel as nice as before. It was setting things up for a more private meeting and didn't I want to avoid those? No, I told myself, I did not. Actually, I was desperate to get his Admiralship alone and - well. Bang my head against a bulkhead repeatedly? Bang his head against a bulkhead repeatedly! That sounded less painful for me.

"And you expected translation?" Well of course

"Of course I have nothing else to do in my ample spare time than to translate Chiss literature."Umm....yes you do.

My mind immediately came up with the image of a bespectacled Thrawn bending over books with a look of concentration on his face and a pencil in one hand. Not giggling was difficult. Not showing amusement impossible. "I'm sorry, sir" I managed. I think someone had been watching Indiana Jones movies to much. Don't tell Thrawn that though he might take you seriously on finding relics and remake you into Lara Croft

"Seven. It it nice to know you can find amusement in this." I couldn't believe he was actually still counting. "Which is the novel you will start with?" Nice, this reminds of the competition between Legolas and Gimli in LOTR

"Since the more circumspect approach did not sit well with you, we will approach the subject of your pregnancy directly." Did not see that coming. What was the other approach?? Does this have to do with Fel questioning you about loving Thrawn?


"Okay?" I tilted my head up to look at him, not sure what he was trying to accomplish. Not, until I felt his hands on my hips. Wow, he is definitely moving forward with the plan and throwing you off balance as well

"Um."

This was not what I had expected. I mean this was science fiction, artificial insemination was most certainly invented; I had been counting on that! There had never been a word, I mean, not explicitly... I had not been expecting to do this the old-fashioned way. Oh bother. I blushed violently.Dreams are definitely not the same

"Don't tell me you still believe in the stork?" he asked sounding amused. I can not imagine him having a sense of humor

And of course that is why you did not update and we have to wait for another week.

 

@ imperial_Warlord5: Strange I imagined her (don't know why I think the baby is female) to be a lighter shade of blue with human eyes. *lol* Imagine the Admiral's look if it would look totally human! *lol* "WHAT THE ....! What have you done?!" *LOL*

 

Thanks for sharing this prickling frustration. Grummel, grummel! I wonder what my husband will make of me taking a cold shower at 11:50 am. Okay, I have my summer holidays from school, but still.

You are brilliant, hon.

Anyway, it is also nice to give us background information about the admiral so nicely.

So young Thrawn had made a beeline from the world of commoners to the Second Ruling House, yadda, yadda. I skipped the military details to find a family tree of the Mitth family at the end of it into the midst of which I'd be cast. Due to his promise in the military service he had not only found a place in the family itself, but even secured the position of a former member that had been vacated by his getting killed in action. All this left me with an almost proper set of parents, one maternal grandmother, two sisters, a brother, loads of cousins, nieces and nephews and one former fiancée. My mind ground to a halt as I carefully reread that, but it was definitely a fiancée, former since his Admiralship got himself exiled.

And you let me know when you have time to pop in for a visit. Shortbread can be baked in less than 1 hour and you know how quickly I can make a bed for you upstairs in my office-room.

 

Look what I just found.^^
http://quizilla.teennick.com/quizzes/3444290/how-much-do-you-like-grand-admiral-thrawn-from-the-sw-eu

 

And 57% of the people taking the test had the same result... I IZ NORMAL!!!!

 

Meesa got the same result, too. Although I clicked some answers with Gackt....

Wohoooot! The last update was awesome! I just came back from vacation (2 weeks without internet) and thought I'd get 2 updates *sigh* but that single one was absolutely worth it. No, I so didn't see it coming!

Oh, is the vita you have of Thrawn in your fic cannon? I mean the age when he entered the military and the part about his fiancee.
I wonder if he loved her or if it was an arranged engagement. Would be an interesting question to ask him, but you might need to get him drunk in order for him to answer....

And I loved so hard about the part where you first imagined banging your head, then his head against the wall...
It seems to me that your head has an unhealthy oppsession with walls....

Anyways, I look forward to the next one!

NZ was a bit too pricy, so I went to Denmark instead. But I'd love to see Middle Earth some time....

 

No update today? Too bad.

 

Kids, kids... it is STILL Sunday!
Maybe you better start checking for the updates on Mondays. I am moving around so much right now, that I just cannot guarantee a time I'll have this updated except before I go to bed...

Well, Katharina, I cannot help you there. First you ask for it and tehn getting it surprises you. Am I doing somezthing wrong?
Mellanna is different, she'll still prefer the book to surprise her, now she'll just be looking for hints and such to know before it ahppens. But since she's even incapable to predict the twists in a book by Zahn, I don't think her chances are any good.
Sorry about your ex. Shall I send Thrawn to overwrite the memory?
I am not going to answer the question if Thrawn can love. I think everybody has to do that for him-/herself. And yes, what if it works out and he can go home? What will happen to Mellanna then? So many questions - no answers. As yet.
Well, what about a Poll? What's the kid supposed to look like? But anybody who knows me, also knows what will determine my final decision...
Totally human would so spoil all plans. Though I think Thrawn'd rather kill me in that case. And probably Dave, just to be sure.
Also: PATIENCE, YOUNG PADAWAN!!!!! >.<

In my imagination things always are more - pleasant, Warlord5.
And, please, do not kill me for the enxt update. Or the following few. I just cannot help being evil. Sowwy.
I know what I'll do to the child colour-wise already, but feel free to speculate.

Oh Ale... I would have fled the room, but making my feet move at all in an orderly fashion was difficult enough. Getting to my quarters took a lot of concentration. Her bed, it is. Though the Grand Admiral might have hoped for a different outcome. I imgaine his surprise to find her curled up in his quarters....
I am the epitome of sneaky.

Well, what did you expect, serenity? A hot hunk like him being single?
You have to explain the Indiana Jones thing to me. I never really watched those movies attentively...
The circumspect way was he trying to be nice. And of course he has a sense of humour: a totally dry one. Another week? I do love optimism.

Frustraion, Azure? If, only on Thrawn's side, but he's most liekely too cool to care.

Speechless about that already, sinre? You want warnings, because sooner or later things are going to be a lot worse. Byss? What Byss?

Gackt?? Chilla, I am astonished. If they had put some other embarrassing jpop alternative in there... but Gackt?
Glad I can still surprise doing the obvious. The vita is my personal 'canon'. Nothing is known about his time in the Ascendancy, so I do whatever I like, or rahter what is necessary for TRISU to work out. There'll be more, but anything you cannot verify with the Wook - made up by me.

---

[u]One-Hundred and Fifty[/u]
[i]
Get your sorry ass out of bed and do something for the Empire!

Go, go, go! This is not a pleasure cruise!

Move it![/i]


I really, really, really, REALLY didn?t want to. I wanted to pull the blanket over my head, curl up in a tight ball and bang my head against the bulkhead. At least, a tiny, mean, nagging voice badgered inside my head, the call asked me to [i]get up[/i] and [i]do [/i]something for the Empire instead of [i]lie back[/i] and [i]think [/i]of it. Groaning I rolled out of the bunk and hit the floor with a satisfactory thunk.

For a long moment I just lay there and waited for reality to assert itself. Too bad it was still the same as it had been the evening before. My hips felt as if they had hand-shaped brandings on them. It was impossible not to think about it and equally impossible to think t

 

The fangirl needs to be resurrected. And get rid of the lingering voice of self doubt. I am sure you will have to wait a week then poke it with a stick, swirl it around to be sure. More then enough time to update again.

So without even taking the test. I am sure I rank up there with you on liking Thrawn waaaaay to much.

As normal as we will ever get.

 

Kids, kids... it is STILL Sunday!

Lol! That just tells you that your readers love the story and are anxious for more.

Maybe you better start checking for the updates on Mondays.

Or Sunday evening.

What's the kid supposed to look like? But anybody who knows me, also knows what will determine my final decision...
Totally human would so spoil all plans. Though I think Thrawn'd rather kill me in that case. And probably Dave, just to be sure.

Lol! I was thinking in the direction of Dave, too.

Gackt?? Chilla, I am astonished. If they had put some other embarrassing jpop alternative in there... but Gackt?

I just went to a concert by him 3 weeks ago. It was amazing. And it's not embarrassing!!!

There'll be more, but anything you cannot verify with the Wook - made up by me.

Good to know. I've been checking that site now that Choices of One is out, but it doesn't have a lot to say about what he does in that book....

Maybe I could at least find something nice to tell him. Not that I could think of any great mythical story cycle that I could relate. I didn?t even manage to keep the most basic of Roman and Greek myths apart. I was such a hopeless case.

You could tell him some SW history. You know, the prequels and such. Or tell him Lord of the Rings.

At breakfast I stacked my plate with chocolate coloured things, none of which tasted even remotely like chocolate.

*chuckles* That is both hilarious and frustrating-sounding.

I didn?t ask questions, I ordered answers. And I retaliated should I not get them. And I retaliated differently should they not be the answers I wanted. I was to get what I wanted.

Sounds like fun....ehem...

?Do I look as if I was joking??I drew myself up and hoped to radiate hauteur.

Nice! That's the spirit, girl! (Now go and try that with Thrawn... )

I dropped my head onto the table. "Great, sir," I murmured to myself. "Now you've really done it."

Good thing Seros isn't around....

Toris shook his head. "And willing to spend the rest of their lives, in a worst case scenario, on a planet apart from everything they know? Raising the child of a man they don't expect to love them ever?"

So he knows what's going on.
But he seems to be a good friend. He raises the right questions.

"No, not 'well'," he interrupted me. "You have to decide. Either he'll never feel anything for you, then this is it; or there is hope. You can't have both."

Die Hoffnung stirbt zuletzt.

BUT HE DOESN'T LOVE YOU!!!

You know, the way I see it, Thrawn has already sacrifized a lot to protect his people (and the galaxy). His career with the Chiss, his name, family, moral values he had before....the only thing he hasn't given yet is his body. Considering all the things he has done, I can't see him having a problem with that one last step....
The thing is that Melanna is uncomfortable with using him that way. But she'll have to sacrifize a lot, too. Love might be one sacrifize. Not being able to return another....(would be ackward with a child...)
But what it comes down to is possibly the lives of billions of people versus the happiness of 2 individuals.

So, getting back to the problem of getting myself plastered all over (or under? Did I really want to know?) Thrawn, if my inner fangirl proved uncooperative, I'd have to try something else. Fast.

I suggest getting drunk. Or beg him for artifical conception.

Btw: When are you going to tell him your real name?

Nice update! Argh....another week to wait!

 

Alright, I might have been a bit too quick here. Thanks for the update! ))

Chilla has a point there: Why did you not ask him for an artifical conception? I am sure they have it. You could tell him that you?re more comfortable with it (and that his fiancée would probably prefer it that way too On the other hand, maybe Thrawn wants you to fall in love with him, then that would be contra-productive, of course. Or maybe he wants some fun! *lol* It would be interesting to see what he would answer in any case.^^

I understand how you feel though. I would also not be able to think of anything except my situation and the next meeting with the Admiral. Getting drunk is also an excellent suggestion. You have not eaten much, thus two glasses of champagne should be more than enough to make you all light-headed and easy. Nature will take care of the rest.

Send Thrawn over to over-write that memory? Thanks, but no. Apart from that line and the following laughter on my site (which totally destroyed the mood) it is a rather nice memory.

Poor Dave. Do you think the Admiral is the jealous type? I?m pretty sure he will not share ?

I find it a bit strange that other people except you two know about the baby plan. It?s not something that I would talk about to other people than those involved (in this case = Thrawn).

Monday? No, that would be one more day to wait! Except you write another scene tonight that I can read tomorrow.

*Sigh* Too bad that I have to wait for another week for the next update. Keep up the good work. I'm sure it will be fun writing the next chapters as it?s getting more and more exciting between the two.^^

 

Hey! Who had let the objections back in again? Out! To summarise: He was amazingly intelligent and also good-looking. He was nice to me. He'd be nice to me in the future, but -. He'd not abandon me. But - Thinking of it this way he was - But - pretty darn perfect. BUT - Oh shut up.

BUT HE DOESN'T LOVE YOU!!!


Dear Etain/MsLanna, you give us the proof "Bleu, bleu l´amoure est bleu"... love thy face is blue and your name is Thrawn...

 

Not sure about the fangirl, serenity, though she'd sure make things easier. I just don't think Thrawn's too fond of multiple personalities in Mellanna.

I didn't mean Gackt was embarassing, Chilla. I was referring to the kind of alternative I would have voted for. J-pop boybands just are embarrassing to like.
Also, stop reading my mind.
Somebody has to talk some sense into her and Arn is still away. Somehow I don't think Jes and Sey'd do a very good job of it. *lol*
Yeah, two indiviudals against the galaxy, not difficult to see what should weigh more. Doesn't mean you have to like it, though. And as you say: Die Hoffnung stirbt zuletzt.
Drunk, huh? Do I want to know what a drunk Thrawn would be like? Probably. Now you're giving me ideas. AU add-ons maybe.
Seeing how I do react to Mel, Lanna and even Mellanna the problem of my true name is a minor one. And I might have spilled in the interview at the beginning anyway. You can hardly talk about all your life without etting that slip.
Yes! only one more week to wait!

Articifial conception is all very well, Katharina, but for the overall goal of being in love it might not work as well as good old-fashioned sex. And Thrawn looking for some nookie - an interesting, if mind-boggling concept.
I am not sure if jealous would be quite the right definition. He'd look after what he considers his, diligently. Possessive might be more like it.
And since Arn is away ther are not many people left Thrawn can send to talk sense into me. As Is aid - Jes and Sey would have too much fun with it.
I have to admit that the following update was not so much fun to write. And next week will be difficult too.

Love is blue, Azure? In TRIDU it sure is. Maybe she shold sing that to Thrawn?

---

[u]One-Hundred and Fifty-One[/u]


I tried everything and nothing worked.

I tried to draw on the music associated with my former daydreams (that were currently tribulations, if not their own devious kind of nightmares). Don't Let it Show - well, no. Maybe some years from now. You'd never know. But it was way to soon for that, if it ever came to bear which, as I had to concede, I really doubted. Du Trägst Keine Liebe in Dir - might be all too true, but was less than helpful right now. Kiss Me - was definitely putting initiative on the wrong party, as did Breathless.

What about Stars? I tried to remember the lyrics, but there was just a heap of shattered words, some of them still holding on to each other. And try as I might that was it. I sure had owned a whole tape of Thrawn-related songs, and had played it diligently for a long time, but I couldn't remember anything else. I looked at the heap of something that had been my inner fangirl and it shrugged apologetically.

I tried to remember the poetry again, but that turned out more than difficult. Admittedly, most had been short pieces (half not discernibly Thrawn related even, if you didn't know me). Even on the scale of 'If-your-skin-was-blue-and-your-eyes-were-red' this rated as very bad. ?Love me/leave me, I would thou couldst? only made sense with Rukh's mission accomplished and 'No Solution' was impossible to remember anyway. Plus I didn't feel like I was standing in tall black feeling.

Pictures were a hopeless idea from the start seeing how I had the original to stare at. Imagining him sitting in his dimly lit art museum was no problem at all, steepled fingers and half closed eyes and all, but anything approaching the subject of social interaction was difficult, thinking about even closer contact absolutely impossible.

So what? There was no art form left I could think of. That probably said everything about my knowledge of art. Still I couldn't bring myself to call a Thrawn action figure a sculpture. Not to mention mine had been eternally poised over a chessboard with the white queen in his

 

I didn't mean Gackt was embarassing, Chilla. I was referring to the kind of alternative I would have voted for. J-pop boybands just are embarrassing to like.

I see, so you like j-pop boy bands. xD Heck, I'm the last person to give you grief for that.

Also, stop reading my mind.

I have no clue what you are referring to...maybe the Lord of the Rings idea?

Drunk, huh? Do I want to know what a drunk Thrawn would be like?

Actually, I meant getting you, Mel, drunk.

Probably. Now you're giving me ideas. AU add-ons maybe.

Actually, a drunk Thrawn would be interesting. I read 2 scenes with drunk Thrawns so far. One of them was exeptionally good. I can't picture Thrawn drunk, but the one author managed to keep him in character.

Seeing how I do react to Mel, Lanna and even Mellanna the problem of my true name is a minor one. And I might have spilled in the interview at the beginning anyway. You can hardly talk about all your life without letting that slip.

That's true. Maybe you let it slip before. Or Thrawn already guessed that it's not your real name, but very close to it and he doesn't mind.

I have to admit that the following update was not so much fun to write. And next week will be difficult too.

Does that mean we can expect MUSH????




Du Trägst Keine Liebe in Dir - might be all too true, but was less than helpful right now.

Ouch! *chuckles* Def the wrong song. (for all non-german speakers, that songs title is: You're carring no love inside/ You have no love inside you)

Kiss Me - was definitely putting initiative on the wrong party, as did Breathless.

How comes you always think of the wrong things when you want to distract yourself?

What about Stars?

You mean the Roxette song? I loooove that one!

I looked at the heap of something that had been my inner fangirl and it shrugged apologetically.

Reality killed the fangirl...

That I was in his hand had never really been questioned. I had known, from the start, that, should he decide to utilise it, he could have me any way he liked. Pitted against a manipulative mastermind I had never had a chance. And I had known it.

Great part. Against Thrawns mind, no one can last...

The only reason I didn't step into the command room a quivering heap of nerves was the lor'kina wrapped tightly around me. I had never really realised ow incredibly useful a fixed set of behaviours war until now. You knew where to stand and what to do, even in the most unsettling of situations. I was not quite sure if this really was one.

I love the way you utilize the lor'kina.

Thrawn was nowhere to be seen.

That would worry me, too.

I stopped in front of one that looked as if somebody had taken apart Terrik?s red Star Destroyer (of which I was not certain it already existed) and rearranged it after plans drawn by Picasso.

Actually, I looked it up. Booster already owned the Errant Venture by then (obtained it 2 years before the Thrawn Trilogy), but it wasn't red yet. He only got it painted red after the Hand of Thrawn Trilogy. http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Errant_Venture

I sighed again. ?No, Cheunh is really the only option,? I conceded.

?8. You have to keep a better reign on your thoughts.?

Goodness, he's still counting the "sir"s?

?Acceptable.? And he returned to discussing the paintings without missing a beat. After the initial explanations the conversation drifted off into technicalities and trying to figure out what some Cheunh words meant which I didn't even know the equivalents in English or German for.

That would be so difficult if you don't know the word in any language.

It was frustrating on many levels, but keeping my mind effectively from my fears at lunchtime. Something was definitely going wrong here.

And I'm sure distracting you like that is exactly w

 

Oh, and I meant to give you this link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1567983/1/

It's a fanfic called Favors, where one of Thrawns female crewman has to pose as his wife. I quite like it. It was written back in 2000 or so, so Outbound Flight hadn't been released yet. It shows in some parts. Cheunh is called Chissi..... But it's fun to read.
The author is female, btw. This is the one story I read with a drunk Thrawn....


The second scene with a drunk Thrawn I'm going to post here. It's from a fanfic ("Clash of fates") where Thrawn is fighting a Vong scout group 15 years before the Vong invasion. It also explains the quote about the artwork Thrawn couldn't understand and whose creators he killed. The scene is shortly after Csilla was attacked and ruined by the Vong and Thrawn's son was killed.
This is a way I can see Thrawn behave if he ever were drunk.


Captain Parck entered Thrawn's VIP suite in the
Annihilator and heard the doors slide shut behind him. He
frowned, squinting in the dim light, then saw the glow of the
Grand Admiral's eyes as he turned his swivel-chair around.

"Ahhhh." The Chiss blinked a few times. "Captain."

"Sir, I just received a message from Moff Niriz," Parck said
as he stepped forward, "repairs to the Imperator are complete
and she is spaceworthy again. I thought we could discuss strategy
for when we arrive-" he trailed off, noticing Thrawn's distracted
state and the sour smell that tainted the metallic air of the Star
Destroyer. "Sir, are you well."

"Don't worry about me, Captain." Thrawn stood, and the
human saw he was a little unsteady on his feet. He held an almost-
empty bottle in one hand and a few others were on a nearby table.
"I am merely," he paused mid-sentence, "conducting an
experiment." He took a few steps forward, and Parck again noted
that slight unsteadiness.

"An experiment, sir?"

"Yes." He smiled a little. "I am testing the theory," he
seemed to lose his train of thought, "that consumption of alcohol,"
another pause, "can lessen a being's grief." He looked at the bottle
for a long moment, then tilted his head back and drained the last of
the fluid. "It doesn't work." He concluded.

Parck licked his lips. "Uh, sir-"

"I made this happen, you know." Thrawn said.

"What?"

"Homeworld. Taesk degraded. V-Vraet." He stumbled
over the last name. "I knew. You see. If I pushed Sang Anor hard
enough. If I frustrated him. He would have to. Come out into the.
Open." He walked past Parck, a slow, purposeful stride.
Suddenly, he broke out into laughter.

"I. Manipulated him very well. Didn't I. Captain?" He
pivoted and, with a cry of rage, hurled the bottle across the room to
shatter against the wall. He watched the pieces fall to the floor,
then slowly turned to face Parck. "I'm so clever. Aren't I? So
brilliant." He closed his eyes. "My son is dead. Captain." His
voice and faced were composed, betrayed no emotion, which made
his announcement all the more terrible. "My only child. My son.
Dead." He frowned and looked at his hands, then back at Parck.

"Captain, I believe I'm drunk."

Parck nodded slowly. "I would have to agree, sir." He
understood now. The Admiral's deliberate movements, so
carefully controlled, were to keep him from staggering. He was
speaking in that halting, equally deliberate way to keep from
slurring. The proper way for a Syndic to behave was trained into
him so deeply that he couldn't abandon it, even in drunkenness.
Parck suddenly felt sorry for his superior.

"Perhaps you should. Run things. Onship. While I.
Recover." There was an armchair behind him. Parck expected
Thrawn to collapse into it, but the Grand Admiral slowly lowered
himself and leaned his head back. "I believe I will. Sleep. Now."
The glowing eyes closed and his breathing became deep and
regular. Parck retreated, allowing Thrawn to retain his dignity.

 

Favors was excellent and the author had some other stories as well that were good.

I love Chilla's commentary on your update. 17 did you slay an elephant or something to get the count up that high.

Could the fiance in Thrawn's vita be you?

Great Update.

 

That scene reminded me of my art professor. He also had to touch everything. I wonder if he ever was thrown out of a museum! If he was, he never told us.



Du trägst viel Liebe in dir!



Please go on writing this fic!

 

You remember what happened the last time I was drunk in TRIDU, Chilla?
The Drunk-Thrawn scene was great. Done really weel. And the story was cute. Not really my kind of Thrawn but I had to laugh a few time.
Ah, yes, Teh Mush. *cough* Have fun with that.
My mind seesm to work like that, a bit like trying not to think of a green elephant. And yes, it is the song by Roxette. I really like that one and the following subject of it.
Oh, thank you. I'll make a mental not of that. Maybe I can send him some colour to hasten the painting. I liked the red Star Deastroyer idea.
You be he is. And with reason.
Well, probably not. But then Mellanna will most likely return in one piece so there'd be no material to work with.
I only slumped in my quarters. Heaven knows what his Admiralship would have done to a slumping Mellanna.

I have no choice, Serenity. If Thrawn wants to rpovoke 'sirs' he'll get them.
And the finacee can't be me, she's from his past on Csilla and last time I knew, I wasn't there.

Will do, Azure. Can't really stop now, I'd be assassinated.

Warning for sinre: If you considered the last meeting of Mellanna and Thrawn to racy for your taste already, you might want to be careful with this one...

---

One-Hundred and Fifty-Two
[i]
Get your sorry ass out of bed and do something for the Empire!

Go, go, go! This is not a pleasure cruise!

Move it![/i]



To my surprise my pad beeped at me as if annoyed when I picked it up. I checked what it wanted and found an assignment to my even greater surprise. It was from Thrawn which was probably not surprising at all and told me to contact Krennel and conduct preliminary talks about possibly meeting and maybe even forming an alliance with Isard.

I decided that this could wait until after breakfast and also after lessons with Seros. And I realised I didn't even mind. Calling people on the phone had sure been on of the things I really hated, but comming them was different. Maybe it was that you usually got to see the people you called. Not so Krennel, who insisted on a voice-only chat. I dropped some heavy hints about how disappointing that was considering his looks, but even though he definitely basked in the attention. I am not sure I really managed to radiate barely suppressed admiration, there was some [i]lor'kina[/i] lingering all over me that just wouldn't go.

Seros was keeping me company at lunch and then Fi and Lyk teamed up to teach me how to work together with my bodyguard under fire instead of getting between his feet. For that I finally got my own blasters back which suddenly sported a fully functional stun setting. Not that it helped any as my shots generally went wide. The only person I might have hit successfully sometimes was Rukh. I saw where this kind of exercise would be useful.

Thrawn kept talking about art and was a perfect gentlemen except for a few very well concerted intrusions that set my head spinning for no obvious reason. There was also a fundamental uncertainty about his attitude towards my personal space. Sometimes he respected it down to a t and sometimes he just ignored it as if there was no difference between an inch an a foot. And that was not taking the fact into consideration that a even foot was not quite the right amount of personal space.

This affected my shooting in such a way that Lyk made a habit of telling me exactly what his Admiralship had been doing last time I met him, which almost led me to making a habit of shooting his face. Lyk's, that is. I was somewhat reluctant to apply force to Thrawn.

When I met up with Dave to get some instructions about meeting Jaing and Luke - which seemed to be happening in the close future though I wasn't told anything about it - I was happy I had not killed his squad mate in a fit of annoyance. He'd sure have taken it badly. And seeing the men I had surrounded myself with, Dave was suddenly the most comfortable

 

You remember what happened the last time I was drunk in TRIDU, Chilla?

Now imagine you had hit his Admiralship with the dart and given him the same offer.....

Not really my kind of Thrawn but I had to laugh a few time.

I have to agree. I like him more the way he is here. More distant, mysterious.

Maybe I can send him some colour to hasten the painting. I liked the red Star Deastroyer idea.

I'm imagining the look on Thrawn's face when you ask him to send several hundred tons of red paint to a smuggler.... Who knows, you might even surprise Thrawn.

The only person I might have hit successfully sometimes was Rukh. I saw where this kind of exercise would be useful.

I'm sure that's useful should he ever turn on you.

There was also a fundamental uncertainty about his attitude towards my personal space. Sometimes he respected it down to a t and sometimes he just ignored it as if there was no difference between an inch an a foot. And that was not taking the fact into consideration that a even foot was not quite the right amount of personal space.

He's doing that on purrrrrrpose.

This affected my shooting in such a way that Lyk made a habit of telling me exactly what his Admiralship had been doing last time I met him, which almost led me to making a habit of shooting his face. Lyk's, that is. I was somewhat reluctant to apply force to Thrawn.

That does sound like a dramatic improvement to your shooting abilities.

It was an easy role to play, I had been a fangirl often enough and all I had to do was tone that down a little.

Knew that being a fangirl has to be good for something.

Body language was easy once you realised how much body you had to speak that language with.

I really like how good your using your body language.

Or a random number that was slowly approaching triple digits. Sometimes I was sure Thrawn was following some kind of sinister plan with that and provoked 'sirs' on purpose.

Hehe. I'm sure he's following some kind of plan.

Simply trying to follow Thrawn?s train of thought caused me headaches.

We are only mortals....

"I only wished your assurance would give me more faith in my abilities."

"You can only do that yourself."

He's right. But I like how he's trying to help you achieve it.

"89," he commented.

Wow! That's a lot of "Sir"'s!

Thrawn was impossibly good at keeping me unbalanced, perched precariously on the edge forever unsure how to react. And this would be it. Forever. Unless.

I like your self-refelction and my fangirl is thrilled by your decision to end the suspense....

For once, the only way out was to act.

Interesting realization. I wonder if Thrawn was waiting for you to take the first step. Waiting for you to come to this realization.

It wasn?t easy, this war within, but might get easier.

Great sentence!

I didn?t have to win, didn?t have to lose - I could choose? And the smile suddenly didn?t feel so sad anymore. And another step brought my face almost up against his shoulder. ?The inevitable one, though.?

I love this part, where she (or you?) is so brave and takes the initiative.

The inevitable result of two converging vectors, apart from a tingling paralysis on my part, was a completely predictable skin contact that still elicited a soft ?oh? from me which escaped only from my lips into his.

First kiss!

For a broken heartbeat I shut down completely.

That sentence is so amazing!

What slowly brought me back was the taste of brass mixed with the tinkling ice-blue glitter of glaciers, cold and sharp despite the feeling that its temperature was actually higher than mine.

I like your description of his taste.

Not to mention some thermonuclear fusion that was blazing outwards from somewhere around my stomach.

thermonuclear fusion!

 

That was the chapter I had been waiting for! PWP? Sure! I take it.

 

"Of those," his lips grazed the skin of my neck softly, "you owe me 89," he said.

Oh.

Well.

I swallowed. So this was what he had been collecting. Sneaky bastard. No way around it really. I began to map my way out along his jaw, trying to think up an innocuous a way down his throat. And then - generally down and around. Better not to think about it to clearly, because faced with the inevitable prospect of getting my mouth on that blue skin, finding out first hand, if he needed to shave and just look at that jawline... I was still staring hesitantly expectant.

Of course he would want something like that. Better keep count.

The first kiss, how sweet of him to be an a$$. Of course send me the email.

My fangirl is happy.

 

I badly want that e-mail, too, hon. You know that I do.

"Your insecurity is charming, if misplaced," his Admiralship informed me.

Maybe it would be a step in the right direction if I stopped calling him that. I closed my eyes shortly, trying to hammer his name into my mind. Thrawn, you call him Thrawn. Now if I could just stop being torn, embarrassed, conflicted and nervous, everything had a chance of proceeding without much embarrassment. Opening my eyes again, I laid my hands on his chest. Phew, step one mastered.

I stared at the white uniform. This was not easy. Though it should be. At least the cloth was soft and smooth; and I would soon find out how such a uniform opened. Research completed.

I just could lie on the sofa, dreaming after reading this update. You make it so real. The story of a woman being madly in love and insecure about it. Could happen everywhere in the universe.

But you are in love with a man like Thrawn... being at his mercy.

 

I hang on on those requests of PM

weird to be that nervous when hoping for it form the start
but I suppose its always different when it is really happening

awesome updates!

 

Oh dear, Chilla, he'd probably take me literally.
Like the idea. What would I have to do, to get a favour like that, thoug? *lol*
The lines were shamelessly appropriated from the Pet Shop Boys. Look ye here at 2:45. Or listen, more correctly.
Thank you. I wondered a long time what the reaction to a first kiss would be. That sounded right. Thingk Messing+Eisbonbons. I even did some resaech abusing a friends brass cup.
Now, that was quite a sinister plan, wasn't it? Blame Choices for this development, I got the idea reading it.
Not sure if he was talking about himself with the 'charming' or generally accepted belief.
Oh, you're waiting for that? But Mellanna has quite a tight reign on that nickname. It might never happen. Sorry. But at least you were happy.

Waited since when, Katharina? I hope not since 2008?

We love him, because he's an ass, serenity. He can hardly stop now, can he?

Azure, you give me menatl images - at Thrawn's mercy indeed.
Might be a rather desirable situation - provided he like sou. *lol*

There's a difference between a fangirl's idea of Thrawn and the reak thing, Maggy. Somehow I think Real!Thrawn is not really a nice person.

---

[u]One-Hundred and Fifty-Three[/u]

I was not shouted awake, and still somehow I was. I looked around bedraggled, feeling somewhat misplaced when my head caught up with the events. Oh.

I sighed with relief when I found the bed next to me empty. This felt all very awkward. I got up and padded into the fresher. That turned out to be not that good a plan. There was a Grand Admiral showering already. Naked Grand Admirals in the morning - way to shock a girl awake!

I grabbed the tooth-cleaner and considered very consciously if the lack of being shouted at would wake you up as much as getting shouted at. At the same time, I concentrated solely on cleaning my teeth. Maybe I should have run for it, but a showering Thrawn is enough to make your mind stop.

"Use water," he advised as he passed me on his way out. "The sonic has been proved to be adverse effects on impregnation."

Now that was very romantic of him. Somehow, romantic did not seem to be in his vocabulary, but what [i]had [/i]I expected? It was probably a huge concession for him not to kick me out in the middle of the night. Well, maybe he had just been too tired for that. I mulled it over. Yes, definitely a plausible option. I took a long cold shower.

There were towels waiting for me when I exited the shower, I should have thought of brining my jumpsuit with me. Retrieving it turned out difficult because through the door I got a glimpse of what a Grand Admiral wore for breakfast: full uniform - or nothing. My scatterbrained search for clothes only served to bring the jumpsuit to light.

I was considering to join Thrawn's clothes-free attitude by necessity as I could not quite find where my underwear had gone to when another thought hit me. ?So how do we explain those sleepovers?? I asked him. ?I think [i]some[/i]body will notice my spending the nights here.?

He looked at me, considering something I wasn?t privy to before getting up. ?The former commander of the ship has taken care of that problem; rather unintentionally, I am sure.? He gestured me back towards the sleeping room and I studiously avoided to think anything except that it really hadn?t been necessary at all to put a hand on the small of my back to guide me along.

At the right side of the bed head he slid open the bulkhead. I went to have a look and found myself staring open mouthed into my quarter just between the bunk and the fresher. What the??

?Admiral Pencron seemed to need the services of his personal Adjutant quite often despite having had his personal ? entrainment suite next to his quarters.?

I was dumbstruck and tried