Before - Legends The Revan Cooking Show/Humor

I was told this was fairly funny so I thought I would post it.

Part 1
The camera zooms in, "IT'S TIME TO DIE MALAK!! FORCE LIGHTNING, ATTACK, ATTACK, FORCE WAVE,"

knock, knock, knock

"Revan, your on in five!"

"Oh," puts down controller, "the food show...." looks sad, then suddenly has an idea "DIE FOR INTERUPTING MY GAME!!" (Force Lightning)

"HK!!!"

"Query: Yes Master?"

"Remove this body, kill some other things, doesn?t matter what, and guest host my show!"

"Statement: Yes Master!!" runs off "Exclamation: DIE MEATBAG SCUM!!"

"Now, back to my game" picks up controller "DIE MALAK!!!"

Part 2
"Fellow Sith and pitiful slaves, welcome to Darth Revan Live!!! Now clap or be horribly mauled by rabid gizca, for our guest host HK-47!!!!"

HK walks in dragging the burnt remains of Revan?s assistant to the sound of AC/DC's Hell's Bells

"Statement: Welcome meatbag scum, today we will be making my Master's favorite dish, Roasted Heart of The Disloyal marinated in the Blood of the Weak, along with a Zakkeg Ear side dish!"

The crowd is silent, then as a chime begins to sound they start to clap wildly looking around for the gizca.

HK slaps the body on the table and removes the heart.

"Statement: There's one down, now I'll need some volunteers."

No one moves

"Exclamation: Good, I get to do this my way!!" pulls out flamethrower and begins to roast parts of the crowd.

"Statement: Excellent, that?s more hearts, now I'll need the marinade and the Zakkeg ears, bring in the blood."

The Disciple is lead in and put in a large cage

"Exclamation: Release the Zakkeg!!"

The Disciple is mauled horribly wile HK uses his flamethrower on the Zakkeg

Statement: Now to retrieve the ingredients."

2 hours later

"Statement: and that?s how you make Roasted Heart of The Disloyal marinated in the Blood of the Weak, with a Zakkeg ear side dish. Oh what the heck, RELEACE THE RABID GIZCA!!"

 

very nice, i like, and what a tasty dish, i bet HK-47 enjoyed every minute to the very core of his processors lol