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The REVENGE of Obi-Wan (JA, humor) COMPLETE 6-27-02 TAGGED

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by CalaisKenobi, Jun 27, 2002.

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  1. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 15, 2002
    The Revenge of Obi-Wan

    Summary: So Qui-Gon has a penchant for ?pathetic life forms? eh? Hmm? wonder how Obi-Wan dealt with that little personality quirk during his apprenticeship

    Disclaimer: I own nothing, well? absolutely nothing worth suing over anyways ;)

    Author's note: Just taking a quick break from my ongoing story The Price of Sacrifice. Check it out if you like Obi-angst (Or just the character of Obi-Wan Kenobi in general :))
  2. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 15, 2002

    \This time he has gone TOO far!\ Obi-Wan mentally screamed as he awoke to the sounds of what seemed to be a large elephant tearing around his quarters.

    \As if it isn?t enough that stupid thing kept me up until 0?dark hundred, but then it wakes me up before the sun has even contemplated rising!\

    With a massive sigh, Obi-Wan tossed what sheets and blankets remained on his bed from the night?s tossing and turning onto the floor. Rising from his bed like a revenge-bent spirit from the grave, he slammed open the door from his quarters to the main room.

    ?MASTER! You had better be awake and handling this situation or so help me, I will be facing charges for Mastericide!? Obi-Wan bellowed as he entered the shambles of what had once been their common room.

    Where there had once stood a couch, complete with pillows and comfy cushions, stood a pile of broken wood, torn cloth and the remains of whatever stuffing that thing had chosen not to eat. In the corner, where Obi-Wan?s Nakitha tree had stood there were only splinters and bits and pieces of leaves.

    \It took Bant six months to track down that tree as a gift for me and Qui-Gon?s project only 5 hours to destroy it. Bant is so going to kill me.\

    The kitchen table stood mostly in one piece, but the chairs that normally surrounded it were nowhere to be seen. All of the contents of the cupboards and the cold box had been spread all over the floor.

    Small tracks through the combination of Muja juice, melted iced cream, and tealeaves left condemning evidence as to just who had perpetrated such mayhem.

    ?MASTER! I am not going to clean this up! This is your problem, your mess, and I am going back to my bedroom now that there is nothing left out here for that little monster of yours to destroy!? Obi-Wan called to his still unresponding master.

    \If he even thinks that he is going to turn this into a patience, or Force levitation exercise in some lame excuse to get me to clean this up, he has another thing coming!\

    Just as Obi-Wan turned from the kitchen to return to his bedroom, he heard the first crash. \I LEFT THE DOOR TO MY ROOM OPEN!\ came the panicked thought as Obi-Wan rushed headlong towards his bedroom.

    When he had left it moments before, aside from the sheets and blankets on the floor, his room had been in perfect order. Whereas Qui-Gon tended to be a bit of a slob, Obi-Wan was a neat freak. He could only imagine the chaos he would soon be entering into.

    Entering his room, Obi-Wan was shocked silent by the damage that had occurred in so short of a time span. Small tracks of the Muja/cream/tea mix covered his sheets, coverlet and what was left of his pillows. Downy fluffs of feathers still floated from the ceiling as the remains of the pillows resettled to the floor.

    The contents of his closet had been spared the staining prints, but the line of drool covering his freshly cleaned tunics and leggings was more than enough to make Obi-Wan suddenly contemplate turning to the darkside.

    Realizing that he was truly in danger of murdering his Master, Obi-Wan retreated farther into his room, and collapsed unto what was left of his bed. \Must not murder Master, must not murder Master?\

    The thought repeated over and over until it became almost a mantra, just as well-used as the standby ?Fear leads to Anger, Anger leads to Hate?? that all initiates were taught from the crèche.

    When Obi-Wan had been accepted as Qui-Gon?s apprentice, he knew that he should expect his Master to be a little unorthodox. The rumors that flew around the initiate dorms were more than enough to prepare him for the rebellious man he would be calling Master.

    What he was not warned of however, was his Master?s other dirty little habit. It was this little innocuous trait that had caused the new mantra to become such a prevalent part of his life.

    Just as Obi-Wan thought that maybe he was capable of facing his Master without wanting to strangle the life out of the man, he noticed that his pants were damp. \Now how did that happen? I kn
  3. JediClare

    JediClare Jedi Padawan star 4

    Oct 8, 2001
  4. Ginger_Jedi

    Ginger_Jedi Jedi Knight star 6

    Jun 4, 2001
    [face_laugh] Poor old Obi! He doesn't have any luck. Good ending too :D
  5. sabercrazy

    sabercrazy Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 2, 2002



    Gotta remember not to fall off the chair next time....

  6. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 15, 2002
    Thanks everyone for the support! This is my first completed fanfic, and only my second attempt at fanfic ever. My other story isn't really humorous, so I needed a break. Its great to hear from all of the other Obi-Wan fans out there. Thanks ya'll!!! :)
  7. babybantha

    babybantha Jedi Youngling star 2

    Jun 1, 2002
    That was hilarious. [face_laugh] Hehe. Poor Obi-Wan...

    Good job!
  8. Tayschrenn

    Tayschrenn Jedi Padawan star 4

    May 24, 2002

    Nice work.

  9. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 15, 2002
    shamelessly upping :)
  10. NabooPrincess14

    NabooPrincess14 Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jun 17, 2002
    That was great! Anything funny happening to Ben and I'll laugh! Good ending too!
  11. sheleigh

    sheleigh Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jan 31, 2002
    heheheh, cute! :D
  12. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 15, 2002
    :CalaisKenobi enters the thread and looks around:


    :She picks up the thread and drop kicks it to the top of the board:

    "there now, that's better :) "
  13. Jacinta_Kenobi

    Jacinta_Kenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Sep 23, 2001
    This was hysterical!
  14. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 15, 2002
    siiiggghhh.... UP!
  15. jedi7

    jedi7 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jan 8, 2002
    How many years for mastericide, [face_laugh] very funny CK. 7
  16. CYNICAL21

    CYNICAL21 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jul 8, 2001
    :D :D :D :D

    Only a person who has weathered the depradations of a child who dragged home anything that was smaller than an elephant could appreciate this vision.

    Nice job.

  17. Antigone

    Antigone Jedi Youngling star 1

    Feb 24, 2002
    LoL! That was great. Wonderfully written little snippet that I am happy to have stumbled over.

    Excellent Job!
  18. Psycho-Freak

    Psycho-Freak Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 30, 2002
    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] Poor Obi!
  19. EveningStar

    EveningStar Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jun 23, 2002
  20. Cascadia

    Cascadia Jedi Padawan star 4

    Apr 15, 2002
    Very cute. :)
  21. CalaisKenobi

    CalaisKenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 15, 2002
    A huge thank you for all who took the time to read and review... I really appreciate the support :D

    Jedi7 How many years for mastericide? TOO MANY... he he he

  22. Malz4JESUS

    Malz4JESUS Jedi Master star 5

    Apr 12, 2002
    LOL! This is funnyness!!! :)
    God bless!

  23. Larkonna

    Larkonna Jedi Youngling star 2

    Mar 20, 1999
    CK I needed a little break from studying so I moseyed on over here. That was just what I needed, a little humor, a little laugh, a little smile to brighten my day! :)
  24. Wild_Huntress

    Wild_Huntress Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jul 15, 2002
    WHAT? Have I not replied to this already? OK well I read it a long time ago and I'm just gonna say I LOVED it!
  25. Flashbacca

    Flashbacca Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 11, 2002
    oh ROTFLMAO!!!!!

    CK that was too funny. Glad I found it. :D
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