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The Road to Hell (Pre TPM) Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon, and some OC.

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by toxikhiro, Aug 15, 2002.

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  1. toxikhiro

    toxikhiro Jedi Youngling star 2

    Jun 13, 2002
    Disclaimer: Me no ownee, me no wantee money. You understand?

    This is just a small exercise for me. I just wanted to see how I do Qui-Gon/Obi-Wan dynamics, and also to see about how I'd write a Gray Jedi.

    Qui-Gon quietly entered the room, watching his young apprentice meditate. Truly, Obi-Wan had potential. Even as a padawan, he surpassed some who had padawans of their own. His skill in the force was unmatched at his age, with a few notable exceptions, most of whom were members of the Jedi Council.

    Obi-Wan sat still as a rock, unmoving. Even his breathing was so slow that it appeared as though he wasn't inhaling or exhaling at all. Qui-Gon didn't want to disturb him, but had some valuable news to relay, and Obi-Wan could easily acheive the state again later.

    He silently approched young Kenobi. "We have a new assignment," he said.

    Kenobi didn't respond.

    "Did you hear me?"

    Still, Obi-Wan said nothing.

    Qui-Gon reached out with his hand, taking a hold of Obi-Wan's shoulder. It was then that he noticed a small sound emerging from Obi-Wan's mouth.

    He was snoring.

    FELICIA_ZEZILI Jedi Youngling star 3

    Aug 5, 2001
    lol that was good He was snoring!

    Is that the whole thing or is there more? because I had whole different idea of what this would contain with a title like "The Road to hell" I've been down that road actually. It's not as bad as you think.
  3. toxikhiro

    toxikhiro Jedi Youngling star 2

    Jun 13, 2002
    Oh, there's more! If that were it, it'd be more like, 'the road to nyquil' ;)

    Obi-Wan shifted uneasily, making his discomfort visibly apparent. The brash fourteen year old, though skilled in the ways of the force still seemed to have difficulty in weilding his lightsaber.

    Qui-Gon laughed inwardly, and said jokingly, "Obi-Wan, I can sense your insecurity through the force! You don't need to let me see it as well!" Jinn assumed his own stance, very much in his element. With his greater size, he was indeed an intimidating figure for young Obi-Wan, and still looked quite young, despite the fact that his hair was beginning to gray.

    Obi-Wan reconsidered his stance, choosing one that, despite its great number of weaknesses, was easy to assume. He was the first to ignite his azure blade, keeping his harsh stare pointed at his master.

    Qui-Gon was less than terrified, and grinned widely as he let his own emerald blade shed its light. Obi-Wan had proven most formidable in this stance, even though it was one of the first that an initiate learned. Though Qui-Gon was easily the master, Obi-Wan was somewhat unpredictable.

    Sensing the padawan's hesitation, Jinn lunged forward, sweeping his lightsaber downward, a move that should have been easily countered by young Obi-Wan.

    Obi-Wan was no master, but he knew a probe when he saw one, and responded in his usual illogical way, by simply rolling to his left, and resuming his stance. He then let loose his own attack, jumping high into the air towards Master Jinn, arcing his blade straight towards his head.

    Jinn was amused by the aerobatic skill of his padawan, but unimpressed. Without his feet on the ground, there was nothing to keep the poor padawan from succumbing to his teacher's not-so-gentle force push, and he flew rather violently to his back.

    Obi-Wan frantically grabbed for his lightsaber, but found that it had already flown into Jinn's patient grasp. Qui-Gon shook his head, and scolded, "You're not thinking at all! You're acting! Sometimes, that might throw your opponent off, but usually, it's just going to leave you in peices!"

    Obi-Wan knew it, but still, he often found himself simply testing his limits, and almost every time he did this, he ended up on his face or his back. Like he was now. He acknowledged defeat. "Yes, Master," he groaned, more out of frustration with himself than the lecture.

    Qui-Gon approached, and extended his hand. Obi-Wan took it, and his master practically lifted him back to his feet.

    "Care to try again?" Qui-Gon smiled.

    Obi-Wan's answer was to snatch the lightsaber out of his master's hand. He went back to his starting position, and ignited the weapon once again. Only this time, he tried the new stance.

    Hope you enjoyed.

  4. toxikhiro

    toxikhiro Jedi Youngling star 2

    Jun 13, 2002
    Replies, please. :D

    The huge station drifted over the watery planet determinedly, unstoppable in its path, practically indestructible. It carried nearly six thousand persons aboard it at any given time, and was, for all intents and purposes, safe. It had shield generators that could protect those inside from feeling so much as a bump, and turbolaser turrets that could bring down a fighter with a single shot.

    But its greatest threat was already aboard, where he could wreak havoc, if only he?d wanted to.

    Damien Gholari stood, simply stood. His eyes were pointed out the huge transparisteel view port at the expanse of stars that made up the visible universe. But the visible universe, Damien knew, was small. What a person sees makes up so little of what actually exists. He had learned that during his training as a Jedi, but long before his supposed descent to the dark side.

    He was not a Dark Jedi, nor did he serve the Council. He was Gray, which described him perfectly. He went generally unnoticed in the large terminals aboard the station, though had the residents known of his capability, they would have fled at seeing him. It was very rarely that someone gave him a hard time, because as soon as they saw the lightsaber, most of them would back off.

    Most of them.

    One of those who thought that he could overcome the force user stood behind Gholari, absent-mindedly twirling a blaster in his hand. This person, this cocky, foolish person was a big-time crime boss aboard the station, which was aptly named Providence Point Station. The crime boss himself was named Rubain Kejjar, and he was well known for three things. Making entrances, killing people, and then making hasty retreats after he did the first two things that he was famous for.

    It was a shame that this lightsaber wielding laserbrain had not witnessed his entrance (it was a good one, even for Rubain), because he would have been treated to quite a sight before his untimely death. Kejjar was done fiddling with the weapon, and trained it on the back of Damien?s head.

    He pulled the trigger.

    And somehow, he missed. How had he missed? The shot was almost at point blank range! He could measure the distance between the barrel and Gholari with his pinky, and yet, he?d missed. He decided that he would try again. He hadn?t drawn any attention to himself (since thankfully, he had thought to silence his blaster), so a second go would make no difference to anyone.

    He took aim, and confidently pulled the trigger.

    And missed once again. Baffled, He examined the weapon. There were no apparent defects, and when he looked around Gholari, he could see that, indeed, the blasterbolts were hitting exactly where they he had pointed them, only it were as though they were traveling around Gholari?s head.

    Dissatisfied with this, he slugged Gholari in the back of the head. Or, he would have, had his fist not passed directly through the Jedi as though he were air. Rubain was suddenly on the floor, having put too much power into the punch, and as he glanced up at Damien, he noticed that the Jedi hadn?t so much as blinked through all of his attacks.

    As he watched, the Jedi simply faded into the air, like steam from a kettle.

    The real Damien Gholari sat at a nearby table, keeping his back to the scene behind him, though he was still able to see quite clearly. He saw with the force what happened when he had removed the image of himself from Kejjar?s mind. He?d seen Kejjar?s terror, followed by frustration, and then finally, his concession, when he walked over to the bar to get a drink.

    Kejjar didn?t so much as look at Damien, even when he passed right by him, accidentally brushing his arm against Gholari?s shoulder. This was due to the Jedi?s brilliant disguise as nothing more than a dirty transpor pilot, for, when it came to disguise, none could outdo Damien Gholari.

    Contented, he sipped his drink.

    There's the Gray Jedi I promised.
  5. kasiaskywalker

    kasiaskywalker Jedi Youngling star 3

    May 1, 2002
    very interesting beginning
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