The Simpsons quote-a-thon

Discussion in 'New Jersey' started by TI-0694, Nov 12, 2004.

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  1. TI-0694 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 11, 2004
    star 1
    Okay so we're all big Simpsons' fans here. So let's pay homage to everyone's favorite yellow family by quoting your favorite lines!


    Homer: Now I wrote down everything here on this card. Just read it and you're a shoe-in!

    Bart: *reading card* Uhh...Mr. Kurns...me Bad... want money now. Me sick.

    Homer: Ooh he card read good!
  2. F16WarBird Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Aug 5, 2004
    star 4
    Homer: "Oh, I'm in no condition to drive. Wait a minute. I don't have to listen to myself. I'm drunk."
  3. BellaSabrina Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 13, 2002
    star 4
    Bart: You could be my role model.

    Homer: No thanks. I don't want my fingerprints all over that mess.
  4. TI-0694 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 11, 2004
    star 1
    Homer: Everytime I learn something new it pushes something old out. Remember when I took that home wine-making course and forgot how to drive?

    Marge: That's because you were drunk!

    Homer: And how!

    ------------------------------------------------------

    Bart: Guys, just so you don't hear any wild rumors, I'm being indicted for fraud in Australia.

    Homer: Pffft...that's no reason to block the TV.
  5. Padawan915 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 1, 2002
    star 6
    Homer: To Alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life's problems!
  6. BellaSabrina Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 13, 2002
    star 4
    Homer: Half of my paycheck goes to Bart, some of my paycheck goes to my Vegas wife. No money gets to go to Moe.
  7. F16WarBird Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Aug 5, 2004
    star 4
    Homer's rendition of the solfege

    "DOH - The stuff that buys me beer.
    RAY - The guy who sells me beer.
    ME - The guys who drinks the beer.
    FAR - A long way to get beer.
    SO - I'll have another beer.
    LA - I'll have another beer.
    TEA - No thanks I'm drinking beer.
    and that brings me back to DOH!"
  8. BellaSabrina Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 13, 2002
    star 4
    Judge: Your wagers will be garnished

    Homer: mmmmm, garnish

    Judge: that means we take money from your paycheck you idiot!
  9. DarthGyos Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 23, 2001
    star 4
    1-800-DOCTORB! The B is for bargain!

    ~DG~
  10. iycis Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2002
    star 3
    Homer: "I am so smart! S-M-R-T!!!!!"
  11. hchristensenfan Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 24, 2003
    star 4
    "DUH!!!
    A deer!!!
    A female deer!!!"
  12. TI-0694 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 11, 2004
    star 1
    No no no no!! It's D-oh! not duh! Oh you young rascals!
  13. hchristensenfan Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 24, 2003
    star 4
  14. TI-0694 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 11, 2004
    star 1
    Ahhh that's okay. It's your first one. I'll let it go. ;)


    And from the same episode:

    Homer: Maybe if we tie it down so it can't move it won't get so hungry.

    Lisa: DAD! You can't do that; it's cruel!

    Homer: Oh everything's cruel according to you. Keeping him chained up in the backyard is cruel. Pulling on his tail is cruel. Yelling in his ears is cruel. Everything is cruel. Well excuse me if I'm cruel!
  15. Padawan915 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 1, 2002
    star 6
    Homer: I'm not normally a religious man, but if you're up there, save me, Superman!
  16. DarthGyos Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 23, 2001
    star 4

    Hans: I was saying Boo-urns.

    ~DG~
  17. BellaSabrina Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 13, 2002
    star 4
    Barney: Dont cry for me, I'm already dead.
  18. DarthGyos Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 23, 2001
    star 4
    Rainier Wolfcastle: The acid is burning my eyes, the goggles do NOTHING!!

    ~DG~
  19. TI-0694 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 11, 2004
    star 1
    FOX 5 has been airing the top 20 episodes as chosen by viewers and I must say I've been very disappointed in the episodes picked so far. Some of them were just stupid picks that did NOT deserve to be on the list. I think some of these people need to watch the classics.
  20. BellaSabrina Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 13, 2002
    star 4
    Cletus: Hey Brandine, that skywriter says Eyes Loves You

    Brandine: Aww Cletus....you're so sweet.
  21. DarthGyos Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 23, 2001
    star 4
    "Some folk'll never eat a skunk, but then again some folk'll like Cletus, the slack jawed yokell!"

    Whats goin on dis side?

    ~DG~
  22. TI-0694 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 11, 2004
    star 1
    Homer: ...I don't think I'd be any kind of father if you got D's and I let you go to Kamp Krusty.

    Bart: But Dad...

    Homer: Son...if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet; they're about to announce the lottery numbers.

    Radio announcer: 17...

    Homer: D-Oh!

    Radio announcer: 26...

    Homer: D-Oh!

    Radio announcer: 32...

    Homer: D-Oh!

    Radio announcer: 3...

    Homer: Woo-hoo!

    Radio announcer: 47.

    Homer: D-Oh!
  23. hchristensenfan Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 24, 2003
    star 4
    [face_laugh] The Simpsons is a great show! :)
  24. TI-0694 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 11, 2004
    star 1
    Amen my dear...amen. If only they'd stop showing the crappy episodes...
  25. BellaSabrina Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 13, 2002
    star 4
    Mr. Plow, that's my name! That name again is Mr. Plow!
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