1. Welcome to the new boards! Details here!

  2. Hey Fanficers! In fixing the prefixes something happened and now you can't edit titles. Don't panic! We're looking into what happened and trying to fix it.

Before - Legends The Story Teller - 1st Sentence Challenge (Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan) Complete

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by azizah, Apr 24, 2007.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. azizah

    azizah Jedi Knight star 1

    Sep 4, 2006
    Title: The Story Teller
    Author: azizah
    Characters: Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan
    Genre: Humor
    Notes: This is just a piece of nonsense for the first sentence challenge from the Qui-Gon & Obi-Wan Discussion Thread that stuck in my head and made me write it last night even though I had other things I was supposed to be doing.

    The Story Teller

    ?Once upon a time there were four little Rabbits, and their names were - Flopsy, Mopsy, Cotton-tail, and Peter.?

    Parties on either side of the negotiations table turned and stared at Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn.

    On one side the angry yellow faces of the Tabarru scowled menacingly, across the table the sour green faces of their adversaries, the Tabarrine glared resentfully. Though genetically separated by only a few generations, the species seemed to have little common ground, save the Tabar, the language they both spoke. Outside of their species there were few who understood it, to humans it was little more than a monotone hum. Unless of course they were angry, then it became an unpleasantly high pitched screech.

    The room buzzed with a low hum, that still sounded angry to Qui-Gon?s inexperienced ear, but at least the screeching that had gone on all morning had stopped.

    Good, Qui-Gon thought, they had finally decided to listen. He decided to press the point now that he had their attention.

    ?And while these are real differences that will require difficult concessions from you both, you must not lose sight of that which binds you together, your common origins and shared desire for peace.?

    The round reflective eyes in the shining silver face of the protocol droid gave it an uncertain look as it cocked its head and listened intently to Qui-Gon?s words.

    Qui-Gon preferred not to use a droid for interpretation, but there were times it was necessary. He thought this one had a particularly soothing voice.

    After what seemed a very long time taken to process his remarks into the obscure language, the droid hummed, ?They lived with their Mother in a sand-bank, underneath the root of a very big fir-tree. ?Now, my dears,' said old Mrs. Rabbit one morning, 'you may go into the fields or down the lane, but don't go into Mr. McGregor's garden: your Father had an accident there; he was put in a pie by Mrs. McGregor.??

    Qui-Gon listened carefully as the droid translated, but he could not pick out any words, it sounded more like someone humming a pleasant tune.

    By the time the droid finished, the room had gone completely silent, no screeching, no angry drone, not even the slightest hum. One or two of the Tabarrine exchanged glances with each other before casting furtive looks at their antagonists across the table. A few grunts, several Tabarru jerked their heads toward the Jedi, many on both sides nodded in agreement. At last there seemed to be some real communication.

    Through the Force, Qui-Gon sensed a lessening in hostility, replaced oddly enough by feelings of confusion. Well, uncertainty was to be expected, working together was a new experience for both sides.

    ?Master.? His young apprentice, Obi-Wan Kenobi, had just entered the room behind him.

    Qui-Gon held up a hand to silence his padawan. His feelings told him that there had been a critical breakthrough in the negotiations, but that the moment could be easily lost.

    ?But Master??

    At seventeen years of age it was rare that Qui-Gon needed to admonish his padawan. All it took was a look.

    Obi-Wan clapped his mouth shut, his face flushed slightly at the reproach, but he made no further attempts to speak.

    Qui-Gon turned his attention back to the negotiations table. Now they were all blatantly ignoring him. There was a constant hum, a few exchanges back and forth across the table, and both sides seemed to be avoiding eye contact with the Jedi master. After a few moments, several of the leaders from both sides got up and walked together to the far corner of the room, where they huddled together in earnest discussion.

    Excellent, Qui-Gon observed. There was littl
  2. Jturtle

    Jturtle Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 9, 2006
    Oh I had a good laugh with this one.

    I can just picture them getting into some kind of situation with a story telling droid for kids!

  3. Kestrel_Kenobi

    Kestrel_Kenobi Jedi Master star 4

    Sep 26, 2005

    What a great little fic! lol - really made me smile :)

    ?But master Jedi sir, I haven?t finished telling my story and it really is one of my best.?

    ?You can tell it to me on the way, or better yet, do you know the one, If You Give a Wookie a Cookie??

    Loved it! =D=
  4. Nienna_Narmolanya

    Nienna_Narmolanya Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jul 5, 2005
    ?You can tell it to me on the way, or better yet, do you know the one, If You Give a Wookie a Cookie??

    [face_laugh] *chokes* This is exactly what I needed after a really stressful day at school. Silly, yes, but it makes sense too, in a silly sort of way. :p A wonderful, unique, and hilarious challenge response! Great job! =D= I love it! If only I could have seen the look on Qui-Gon's face... I bet it was priceless.
  5. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Master star 6

    Mar 1, 2002
    That was adorable. Loved the stories that the droid was telling. No wonder the Tabaruu were confused.

    Great job.
  6. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Aug 21, 2006
    Nice story, mixing up droids. Did Obi-Wan have a bear when he was an initiate?
  7. Lord Vivec

    Lord Vivec Force Ghost star 8

    Apr 17, 2006
  8. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Feb 5, 2004
    What a great way to start my day! :D

    Qui-Gon thought his apprentice was being overly cautious as usual, ?Padawan, as Jedi we must work with what tools we have. You will not always have a protocol droid to interpret for you or to explain local custom, you must learn to rely on your feelings.?

    Obi-Wan still looked rather doubtful. Qui-Gon found it slightly amusing, ?Trust me, Obi-Wan, my feelings tell me this droid will do fine.?

    Obi-Wan sighed, perhaps his master was right. He was on occasion. And it did seem as though the group in the corner had reached some kind of consensus, as shown by the Tabar custom of pressing noses together

    Perfection! =D=
  9. ratna

    ratna Jedi Knight star 4

    Mar 1, 2007
    having adored all of those stories as a child, not to mention passing them on to my own children, i found this positively enchanting.

    what a delightful "x-over"

    and it apparently worked for the negotiations as well
    something along the lines of "All I Ever Really Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten", perhaps?

    thanks for posting
  10. arkham618

    arkham618 Jedi Youngling star 1

    Apr 27, 2007
    A really delightful story. For some reason, I was reminded of a Zen fable. The diplomats were shocked to their senses by an apparently nonsensical children's story. United in shared confusion, so to speak.

    Stylistically, your writing is superb. Not too verbose, excellent pacing. The humor arises from the irony of the situation, not from any forced comedic dialogue or slapstick action. Very enjoyable.
  11. Jedi_Tigris

    Jedi_Tigris Jedi Knight star 4

    Mar 7, 2005
    [face_laugh] I bet the negotiators were really puzzled by the Jedi, lol. Probably reached a consensus based on thinking the Jedi was very strange or something. :p Very nice story!
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.