The SW Anti-Guru

Discussion in 'Classic Trilogy' started by DarthGelatinous, Jun 13, 2001.

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  1. DarthSapient Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jun 26, 2001
    star 10
    Is anyone willing to take the chance at translating what that other protocol droid told C-3PO on Cloud City that was so rude?
  2. DarthGelatinous Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 15, 2001
    star 2
    Your momma's a microwave and your father is Darth Vader.
  3. DarthSapient Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jun 26, 2001
    star 10
    Yeah, that was rude. Now I see why 3PO was as upset as he was.
  4. DarthGelatinous Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 15, 2001
    star 2
    Sometimes the truth hurts.
  5. HighWiredSith Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 25, 2001
    star 2
    Hey Guru, I was wondering, why was the only fat rebel pilot named Porkins?
  6. DarthSapient Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jun 26, 2001
    star 10
    Yes, that was a little insensitive. But bear in mind that this movie was released prior to the phenomenon known as political correctness. And why was one of the smallest creatures known as Salacious Crumb?
  7. DarthGelatinous Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 15, 2001
    star 2
    "Hey Guru, I was wondering, why was the only fat rebel pilot named Porkins?"

    Because "The Amazing Mr. Lipid" was too long.
  8. Kitt327 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 23, 2000
    star 4
    Okay, here we go. This question is bound to stir up controversy, but I must know, O wise guru. Star Wars canon - what is it?
  9. DarthGelatinous Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 15, 2001
    star 2
    "Star Wars canon - what is it? '

    The movies along with everything I have written on this 8 page thread.

    There have been rumors that some books have been written using our beloved SW characters in new storylines. Frankly, I have a hard time believing it. Besides, who has time to read. What with movie watching, playing with my action figures, writing manifestos to Natalie Portman declaring my undying love, stalking David Prowse and posting messages, my day is pretty much filled up.
  10. Old_Brown_Shoe Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 23, 2001
    star 4
    O wise guru, what does the D of good ol' Red Four John D.'s name stand for? And, if they call Porkins "Piggy" in the novelization, does that mean pigs exist in the SW Universe?
  11. Kebis Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 25, 2001
    star 1
    Mr. Guru, in ROTJ, we see the forrest moon of Endor. What's the actual planet like?
  12. DarthGelatinous Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 15, 2001
    star 2
    "O wise guru, what does the D of good ol' Red Four John D.'s name stand for? And, if they call Porkins "Piggy" in the novelization, does that mean pigs exist in the SW Universe?"

    Denver. He wasn't a very good pilot.

    Pigs don't exist but there is a character named Piggy in SE ROTJ. If you look carefully during the campfire celebrations on Endor you can see him being impaled for trying to take the conch.

  13. DarthGelatinous Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 15, 2001
    star 2
    "Mr. Guru, in ROTJ, we see the forrest moon of Endor. What's the actual planet like?"

    Its cold, quiet, not much culture to speak of...its a lot like Canada.
  14. DarthSapient Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jun 26, 2001
    star 10
    Piggies may or may not exist. But we do know of the existence of ducks.
  15. LinaOrgana Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 22, 2001
    star 2
    Oh, wise one...

    How does R2-D2 descend the stairs into Jabba's reception room?

    What do banthas eat? Dewbacks?

    And is there in fact an evolutionary link between the ewok and the koala? If so, how did the ancestral koalas get to Endor?
  16. LinaOrgana Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 22, 2001
    star 2
    Oh, wise one...

    How does R2-D2 descend the stairs into Jabba's reception room?

    What do banthas eat? Or dewbacks, for that matter?

    And is there in fact an evolutionary link between the ewok and the koala? If so, how did the ancestral koalas get to Endor?
  17. LinaOrgana Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 22, 2001
    star 2
    Oh, wise one...

    How does R2-D2 descend the stairs into Jabba's reception room?

    What do banthas eat? Or dewbacks, for that matter?

    And is there in fact an evolutionary link between the ewok and the koala? If so, how did the ancestral koalas get to Endor?
  18. LinaOrgana Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 22, 2001
    star 2


    Oh, wise one... how does R2-D2 descend the stairs into Jabba's reception room?

    What do banthas eat? Or dewbacks, for that matter?

    And is there in fact an evolutionary link between the ewok and the koala? If so, how did the ancestral koalas get to Endor?
  19. LinaOrgana Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 22, 2001
    star 2


    Oh, wise one... how does R2-D2 descend the stairs into Jabba's reception room?

    What do banthas eat? Or dewbacks, for that matter?

    And is there in fact an evolutionary link between the ewok and the koala? If so, how did the ancestral koalas get to Endor?
  20. LinaOrgana Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 22, 2001
    star 2
    Oh, wise one...

    How does R2-D2 descend the stairs into Jabba's reception room?

    What do banthas eat? Or dewbacks, for that matter?

    And is there in fact an evolutionary link between the ewok and the koala? If so, how did the ancestral koalas get to Endor?
  21. LinaOrgana Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 22, 2001
    star 2


    Oh, wise one... how does R2-D2 descend the stairs into Jabba's reception room?

    What do banthas eat? Or dewbacks, for that matter?

    And is there in fact an evolutionary link between the ewok and the koala? If so, how did the ancestral koalas get to Endor?
  22. LinaOrgana Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 22, 2001
    star 2

    Oh, wise one... how does R2-D2 descend the stairs into Jabba's reception room?

    What do banthas eat? Or dewbacks, for that matter?

    And is there in fact an evolutionary link between the ewok and the koala? If so, how did the ancestral koalas get to Endor?
  23. LinaOrgana Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 22, 2001
    star 2
    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH! I just checked this thread and saw how many times that damn thing posted! I am so sorry... I didn't know it had done that... is there any way I can go back and delete the extra posts?
  24. DarthGelatinous Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 15, 2001
    star 2
    "Oh, wise one... how does R2-D2 descend the stairs into Jabba's reception room?"
    Some believe that Artoo has some sort of hidden repulsor lift device. The truth is that he fell. Don't worry, Artoo is the master of the pratfall. He was two years ahead of me at Clown College.

    "What do banthas eat? Or dewbacks, for that matter?"
    They both eat french fries with mayonaise. I don't understand it, it must be a European thing.

    "And is there in fact an evolutionary link between the ewok and the koala? If so, how did the ancestral koalas get to Endor?"
    There is no link to the koala but there is a link to the rare North American bear species, the Fozzie.
  25. Erk Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 12, 2001
    star 4
    Mr. Anti-Guru, is EU CANON or CANON EU, is TPM CANON and ANH EU, is SWROTJSE EU or CANON Is SE EU or CANON, is there a TPMSE or a TPMEU. And where does RPG fit in.
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