Saga The Things We Don't Talk About (Clone Wars. A little bit of Anakin/Ahsoka bonding)

Title: The Things We Don?t Talk About
Author: karebear
Timeframe: Clone Wars movie
Characters: Anakin, Ahsoka, other minor appearances
Notes: This is really more about the concept of Anakin and Ahsoka?s relationship than anything else. It?s a sketch, it leaves a lot out and jumps around. I specifically didn?t try to get the details right, and I?m sure I got some things in the wrong order, because to be honest, I really wasn?t paying that much attention in the movie, but this idea forced itself to be written. It wouldn?t leave me alone.


?The whole world is waiting to see when you fall."
- Saves The Day

This kid is going to get him killed. She is reckless and stupid and annoying and.... and everything he was at nine years old, when he flew a starship he had never seen before into a raging space battle and blew up an enemy control ship. They told him he?d saved a planet and thrown a parade in his honor. Was it really fair for Ahsoka to only get scolded and yelled at?

She?s afraid of what might happen to her, and he can?t really blame her. The Jedi Council isn?t what he would call understanding at the best of times, and she?s already younger than most Padawans. Everyone was already expecting she wouldn?t be able to hack it, himself included. The least he can do is to stand by her side and take some of the blame. She isn?t a bad kid. One could even say she?s got a lot of good qualities. She?s smart and brave and willing to throw herself into harm?s way to help others whether they want her to or not.

He?d watched her rush headlong into battle with destroyer droids and crime lords without flinching. She?s an eleven year old soldier, the same as the clone warriors surrounding them. They rise to their circumstances, and they become what the galaxy forces them to be. He?s done it too. That doesn?t make it easy. He pulls her away in the quiet aftermath of battle when the adrenaline high fades and all the fear you were supposed to feel before but didn?t rushes in to take it?s place. The firelight flickers shadows over her face, and he feels cold despite it?s heat and notices her pulling her cloak tight around her shoulders. He moves closer to her, and she looks surprised. He realizes it?s the first time he?s not actively pushing her away.

?Time to level, Snips. Are you scared??

?No..... I?m not supposed to be.?

Oh, yeah, like he needed her to quote the Jedi Code to him.

?I didn?t ask if you?re supposed to be. I asked if you are.? She smiled, but this time it wasn?t a front. It only proved to remind him yet again of how young and fragile she actually was.

?Captain Rex said only idiots aren?t scared in a war.? It didn?t answer the question, not directly anyway, but it still said a lot. Maybe it was admission that he wasn?t the only one who threw the Jedi Code out the karking window as so much impractical garbage.

?You should probably listen to Captain Rex. He?s pretty much custom-built to be smarter than either of us normal-born losers. Even if you do technically outrank him.?

?We?re not normal though,? she said soberly, her tone making her sound far older than she was. She could do that sometimes, and he still wasn?t used to it. He supposed they all had their moments, when the galaxy was falling apart all around them. ?We?re Jedi.?

He nods. Despite everything, they are, whatever that means.

Right now it means saving a baby who is innocent despite the evils committed by it?s father, it means nursing a sick child who is almost certainly destined to grow into a criminal, it means assisting a crime boss because it?s convenient, it means opening the door to hyperspace routes bought with the blood of slaves.

The flight to Tatooine isn?t long by his standards, but then by now he?s more than used to traveling to every edge of the galaxy. He tries to remember how things felt when he was Ahsoka?s age, and he finds it difficult. He feels like its been a million lifetimes since he was eleven, the age when Jedi are just beginning to lea

 

Great stuff, karebear, Anakin and Ahsoka was one of the best things about Clone Wars and I look forward to seeing many, many more fics with her in them.

 

Great post and is this going to continue?

Love to see more about Anakin and Ahsoka and the relations with the other Jedi.

 

great post like the idea of this

 

Oh, well done indeed. Love the tense you used, and this shows Anakin is truly maturing (though unfortunately it doesn't continue).

Ahsoka is making him think, and reflect - on his past and perhaps his future - his relationship with Obi-Wan - his past deeds.

Nicely, nicely done.

 

Amazing emotions!
The points of view are very very phenomenal!
How do you do that??
Are we going to get more? Just asking.
This is SO good!

tapping fish
geek of no baseball

 

Wow! This is amaz-za-zing! PM me when you update and you'll definitely hear from me!

Rachel Rose

 

What a wonderful peek into Anakin's mind.

I loved seeing him driven a bit crazy for a change, while underneath it all he truly cares for Ahsoka.

Great job on this

 

Nice, very nice. I think you captured the inner Anakin quite well on this one.

If you post more, please PM me.

 

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing everybody. I really appreciate it. It turns out my muse had some more ideas in store for me with regards to Anakin and Ahsoka. I've written a companion piece to this here, from Ahsoka's point of view, called "All The Things She Said", which can be found here, for those interested.

 

This was very well done. I think you've really captured their relationship as well as Anakin's doubts and fears.

Wonderful.

 

Wow. Fascinating glimpse into Anakin's thoughts. I love how you show that his instability is present, even this early.

The cruelty of that desire doesn?t even surprise him anymore. He?s used to the lurking whispers in his brain, and the things he?s done are far worse. He carefully locks the thoughts away in the most secret places in his mind. He can control it, most of the time. He can control it when it matters.

Anakin was broken to begin with, and he never really healed. Great introspective!

 

The was a special piece, karebear. I don't think I've ever read such a rich self examination by Anakin Skywalker. I was wrapt with every word. And I don't like Anakin. Something about the Clone Wars movie set Anakin apart from his prequel self. Perhaps the padawan, but more than that, he seemed a little more self-less that ever before.

He doesn?t want Ahsoka near him. It isn?t safe. Because it only took a few days for him to realize that she is far more than just an okay kid. She?s a great kid, and she deserves a lot more than what he can give her. The fear of what might happen, the knowledge of who he can be, gnaws at him, curled up cold in his chest. He can control it when it matters. He can control it most of the time. But what if she?s nearby when he can?t? What if he hurts her?

But he can?t explain any of that, because he?s tried a thousand times and no one hears him, even when he feels as though he?s been screaming it all his life.

You show, here, with excellent prose the inner struggle that afflicts Anakin. It is one he is aware of, but one he is ultimately unable to overcome. I felt for him in the fic more than I ever have before. much praise.

 

I think you really captured the "feel" of Anakin's mindset during the movie. She's a good kid and he's not a bad guy and they can both learn from each other.

Great job!

 

My word that was just amazing it was like I was reading a scene from Karen Traviss's tale 'Clone wars' How you describe the darkness within him and how he's slowly succumbing to the DS and what it will mean for Ahsoka. How already he feels protective of her as though she were his daughter or a little sister. Not to mention how in some ways she is also his conscience.

 

This is just plain amazing.

 

Part of the reason I returned from a three year hiatus from Star Wars was the new animated series. I think the relationship between Anakin and Ahsoka is very compelling, and you've mentioned many of the reasons in this story. I like that Ahsoka brings out a caring, mature part of Anakin that we didn't really see in the movies, and it also highlights the fact that Anakin had more attachments issues than just Padme, which makes his fall all the more tragic and yet understandable.

The same can also be said of Obi-Wan, who was taken in by Qui-Gon for the same reasons. So really, it's like Ahsoka is part of a legacy of her own. It also makes Anakin seem less selfish than he was depicted in the movies - it certainly would have been easier and more expedient to send Ahsoka away, but he didn't. Whether because he cared about what happened to her, or because he understood how Obi-Wan cared about what happened to him, you've touched upon it with a really caring eye.