FF:WA The Wild World of Weird News

I've decided I have to start listening to Triple J and watching ROVE more often!

Rove has sponsered a hippo in Sydney (I think) that went on a rampage the other week and killed it's baby, then killed another baby... This week, in Perth, a wombat escaped and went on a rampage... Rove now wants to sponser the wombat as well. He is planning on making a rampaging animal army. Pretty funny huh?

Listening to Triple J this arvo, they had comedian dude Adam Richard on the show for the segment they call "Hurrah for Anything: A chance for us to uncover the dirtiest dirt on all those stars that we luv to bag, courtesy of the bitchiest man in the industry, Adam Richard."...
Some of the "dirt" for todays segment was that...
Britney Spears has opened her own resteraunt... She invited a lot of celebrities to the opening (Brad Pitt, Jennifer Anniston, Whitney Houston) and no-one turned up!! A bunch of fans were outside the resteraunt waiting for it to open and Britney, after arriving 90 minutes late, walked straight passed them. The fans started booing and heckling her!!

Here's a couple more news stories from a website I regularly check out...
Osama Bin Firecracker
Preacher: `July 4 Is Hip Hop's Independence Day!'
Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs

Post your own weird news stories...

 

I don't think we have anything that weird over here

 

Just to clarify a few things for everyone, FA must have missed that episode of Rove Live, not to worry.

The hippo is based in Melbourne and didnt go a rampage as such. The hippo sat down on his/her own baby and killed it, it then thought it was the other hippo who killed its baby, so he/her killed his/her own baby. As funny as it sounds, that still 2 baby hippos dead.

 

Actually I didn't miss the episode, but that's pretty much what happened, and what Rove wants to do... And don't forget, the hippo is pregnant again.

 

sounds like a hussie hippo to me

 

Yeah, FA had it right. Perhaps not down to the exact pedantic wording, but that really would take all the fun out of it ...

Anyways, about the Briney Spears opening ... LOL. Another bad one to add to the load of piss-throwing and other "mishaps". Good on her - ah, what would the world be without manufactured pop tarts to poke fun at ...

 

Oh boy, Ive heard it all now

 

Here's a couple more weird news stories from the site I mention above...

Red Balloons May Prove Ballooning Terrorist Threat
Candy Market Flush with Gross-Out Candy

 

Maybe ROVE can sponser LD

 

Heh, the toilet candy article ... I used to buy those for my sister, they sell them at shops in Chinatown in Sydney.

 

Here's some more from Weird and Offbeat News Stories

Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs

ADALAIDE, Australia (Wireless Flash) -- "But officer, my dogs were driving!" That's the excuse an Australian man gave after his car nearly hit a police officer. The 41-year-old motorist claims one of his pooches pressed the gas pedal while the other switched gears. A judge ruled the excuse "stretched credulity beyond the breaking point" and banned the guy from driving, reports the Australian Broadcasting Company.

KUALA LUMPUR -- Malaysians are getting their kicks by sniffing fresh cow dung because strict anti-drug laws have left them with little else to use to get high. Cow dung emits a sulfur-like gas which can give a high, says the National Narcotics Agency.

Weird News Headlines and Stories

Tune Out Your Friends Without Them Noticing

 

PML!

 

Not exactly weird news, and I apologise if I don't get this worded right, but it should be almost right...

Was watching channel 10 this evening and a news update came one. I've worked out they really need to do appropriate pauses between each news story... Here's (roughly) what was said tonight...

"A ten year old girls extasy death leading to the sale of Telstra".

I mean, how bad is that!!! Again, the wording may not be completely accurate, I was waiting to hear it again before I posted this but it didn't come on again. So yeah. I think that's really shocking!

EDIT: Just checking out that website again, here's some more stories for you...

Netheads Voting On When Julia Roberts' Marriage Will End

Kids Think George W. Bush And Osama Bin Laden Are More Important Than God

Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs

BOMBAY, India -- Ouch! An Indian man has attempted to set a new record for having cement blocks smashed on his groin. The 36-year-old martial arts expert piled three 41-pound blocks on his crotch and had an assistant crush them with a sledgehammer, reports ananova.com.

ESCRAVOS, Nigeria -- A few hundred women in the Nigerian village of Escarvos are threatening to go naked in protest of labor management. That may not sound too fierce, but Nigerian tribes consider female nudity an extreme form of protest.

BANGALORE, India -- A doctor in India is getting some stiff disapproval for using a knock-off form of Viagra to cure three newborn babies of respiratory troubles. The medical community says what he did was unethical even though it worked.

 

Here's a couple more news stories for you...

Current Weird News Stories Making Headlines
July 23, 2002 - Wireless Flash

Austin Powers Good Role Model For Randy Men
SAN JOSE, Calif. (Wireless Flash) -- You might think Austin Powers' legendary mojo is just a joke but a man who teaches computer nerds how to pick up women says Powers has important lessons to teach.

July 24, 2002 - Wireless Flash

Born Under The Sign Of `Border Bowl'
SEDONA, Ariz. (Wireless Flash) -- Astrology may be harder to stomach than ever now that Taco Bell has its own zodiac sign.

 

Hmm, reminds me of a movie I saw "When deep spacew exploration wraps up, it'll be the corporations that name everything. The sears constelation, the microsoft galaxy, planet starbucks"

Don't think I'll be laughing at that part of the film anymore

 

A Charlotte, North Carolina lawyer purchased a very rare and expensive box of cigars, and insured them against fire among other things.
Within a month of having smoked his entire stockpile of these great cigars, and without having made even his first premium payment on the policy, the lawyer filed a claim against the insurance company.

In his claim, the lawyer stated that the cigars were lost 'in a series of small fires'.

The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason: That the man had consumed the cigars in the normal fashion. The lawyer sued and won.

In delivering the ruling the judge agreed with the insurance company that the claim was frivolous, however the judge stated that the lawyer held a policy from the company in which it had warranted that the cigars were insurable and also guaranteed that it would insure them against fire, without defining what is to be considered 'unacceptable fire', and was obligated to pay the claim.

Rather than endure a lengthy and costly appeal process, the insurance company accepted the ruling and paid $15,000 to the lawyer for the loss of his rare cigars in the 'fires'.

NOW FOR THE BEST PART...

After the lawyer cashed the cheque, the insurance company had him arrested on 24 counts of arson. With his own insurance claim and testimony from the previous case being used against him, the lawyer was convicted of intentionally burning his insured property and sentenced to 24 months in jail and a $24,000 fine.

Apparently this is a true story and was the first place in the recent Criminal Lawyers Award Contest.

 

I love that story!! I'm pretty sure it was passed around as a joke a couple of years back though... Still just as funny now though...

EDIT: I was just checking out the Darwin Awards site (can you belive I had never visited before?? ). Anyway, I couldn't resist posting the following "personal account"
___________________

Chemistry Lesson
2002 Personal Account

(2002, England) I am a high school science teacher in Birmingham. I usually teach physics, but due to teacher shortages, I ended up teaching chemistry a few years ago. As you all know, chemistry can be fun, especially when you get onto the subject of reactive metals.

I decided to liven up a particular chemistry lesson by demonstrating the awesome energy released when silver nitrate, magnesium, and a drop of water are mixed. This particular reaction is very violent, exploding in a brilliant white flash when the water is added. It usually ends up shattering the crucible. On this particular occasion I decided to put the chemicals in a sturdy mortar dish to save on crockery. This was my first mistake.

I carefully mixed the powders in the bone-dry mortar, stepped back, and at arms length added a drop of water with a pipette. A small fizz preceded a violent flash, and a collective "ahhhh" from the impressed pupils. As always on these occasions, the pupils shouted, "Do it again, sir!" And as always I said, "OK!" But this time I didn't require a new, bone-dry crucible because Mr. Clever had used a sturdy, reusable mortar dish. I proceeded to add the chemicals again to the mortar, and that was my second mistake.

I added the silver nitrate crystals and crushed them up a little. I then added a liberal spatula of magnesium powder and began to mix the two, my head bent over the dish to see that they were mixed properly. Unfortunately for me, the mortar was damp and warm from the previous reaction. Fortunately for me, as well as having inherited a stupidity gene, I inherited a gene for very fast reflex actions.

At the first hint of a fizz, I threw my head back whilst simultaneously shielding the mortar from my face and body with my hands as the violence of nature was unleashed from the chemicals in the dish. Within a hundredth of a second the reactants spewed forth their energy in a blinding flash of pure white light and heat. You can guess what happened to my hands.

My third mistake occurred later at home, after my trip to the hospital for emergency treatment. Both my hands were heavily bandaged and my head was pretty fuzzy on account of the prescription painkillers I had taken for the excruciating pain of the second-degree burns. I decided to have a cigarette, since it had been a pretty rough day. I don't know if you've ever tried to light a cigarette lighter with fully bandaged hands. Anyway, let me just say I found it rather ironic that burn dressings are flammable.

To finish off, I would like to apologize to my three children. I'm sorry if you've inherited that particular gene of mine that leads me to do stupid things.

DarwinAwards.com © 1994-2002
Submitted by: Jason Southall
___________________

Wow, that's pretty long. Oh well...

 

Got this from the ABC Melbourne site during my 4 hour break at tafe today:

In March, 1999 a man living in Kandos (near Mudgee in NSW) received a bill for his as yet unused gas line stating that he owed $0.00. He ignored it and threw it away.

In April he received another bill and threw that one away too. The following month the gas company sent him a very nasty note stating they were going to cancel his gas line if he didn't send them $0.00 by return mail.

He called them, talked to them, they said it was a computer error and they would take care of it.

The following month he decided that it was about time that he tried out the troublesome gas line figuring that if there was usage on the account it would put an end to this ridiculous predicament. However, when he went to use the gas, it had been cut off.

He called the gas company who apologised for the computer error once again and said that they would take care of it. The next day he got a bill for $0.00 stating that payment was now overdue. Assuming that having spoken to them the previous day the latest bill was yet another mistake and he ignored it, trusting that the company would be as good as their word and sort the problem out.

The next month he got a bill for $0.00 stating that he had 10 days to pay his account or the company would have to take steps to recover the debt. Finally, giving in, he thought he would beat the company at their own game and mailed them a cheque for $0.00.

The computer duly processed his account and returned a statement to the effect that he now owed the gas company nothing at all.

A week later, the manager of the Mudgee branch of the Westpac Banking Corporation called our hapless friend and asked him what he was doing writing cheque for $0.00. After a lengthy explanation the bank manager replied that the $0.00 cheque had caused their cheque processing software to fail. The bank could therefore not process ANY cheques they had received from ANY of their customers that day because the cheque for $0.00 had caused the computer to crash.

The following month the man received a letter from the gas company claiming that his cheque has bounced and that he now owed them $0.00 and unless he sent a
cheque by return mail they would be taking steps to recover the debt. The man then tried to file a debt harassment claim against the gas company.

It took him nearly 2 hours to convince the clerks that he was not joking but convince them he did. They subsequently provided statements which were considered substantive evidence of the aggravation and difficulties the man had
been forced to endure during this debacle.

The matter was heard in the Magistrate's Court in Mudgee and the outcome was this: The gas company was ordered to:

[1] Immediately rectify their computerised accounts system or show cause, within 10 days, why the matter should not be referred to a higher court for consideration under Company Law.

[2] Pay the bank dishonour fees incurred by the man.

[3] Pay the bank dishonour fees incurred by all the Westpac clients whose cheques had been bounced on the day our friend's had been.

[4] Pay the claimant's court costs; and

[5] Pay the claimant a total of $1500 per month for the 5 month period March to July inclusive as compensation for the aggravation they had caused their client to suffer.


lol

 

I wonder if we can do that with our power. They are constantly trying to cut it off because we "haven't paid our account according to arrangements" when we have done. We pay the money, we ring up and give them the reciept number and then the next day we get a knock on our front door saying that it hasn't been paid and we now have to cut off your power. That's happened at least 4 times now! It's getting annoying.

 

Is it the same person who comes to disconnect your power every time?

 

Jester - I don't know, Soup generally opens the door.

Anyway, back on topic, kinda...

Palm Reading Gets A Handle On Criminal Behavior
POCATELLO, Idaho (Wireless Flash) -- If you want to find out if your child is a future hoodlum ahead of time, look at his or her hands.

Editor Has Designs On Crop Circle Coffee Table Book
ASHEVILLE, N.C. (Wireless Flash) -- If crop circles are fake, the pranksters behind them are missing out on a serious art career.

Flash Lites: Rip `N' Read Pop Culture Recap
MEXICO CITY -- Britney Spears recently cut a concert in Mexico City short due to unexpected rain. Although Spears apologized profusely before leaving the stage, her fans become unruly, throwing chairs and refusing to leave the venue. Said one angry fan, "I paid 1,500 pesos to hear only five songs."

 

Weird News Headlines and Stories

Freaky Friar Tortures Ballerina For 27 Years
NEW YORK (Wireless Flash) -- As if the Catholic Church didn't have enough PR problems. Now, a former ballerina is accusing a Catholic priest of demonically possessing her for 27 years.
Here is the former ballerina's webpage...

`Inside Edition' Reporter Goes Undercover As Pregnant Frog
NEW YORK (Wireless Flash) -- "Inside Edition" reporter Stacey Gualandi is going undercover for the show -- as a pregnant frog.

Techies Unearth Cockroaches And Marijuana In Computers
SOMERVILLE, N.J. (Wireless Flash) -- Your computer is more likely to crash because of a real bug than a computer bug, if a new survey of computer technicians is any indication.

Around The Weird; Bizarre News Briefs

BERKELEY, Calif. (Wireless Flash) -- The hippy-dippy California city of Berkeley is looking to set a world record for -- brace yourself -- breast feeding. More than 675 lactating mothers are expected to show up and breast feed together during Saturday's attempt to break the current record of 536, reports sfgate.com.

ROCHDALE, England -- It was a funeral fit for an ice cream man when 68- year-old frozen novelty seller Derek Greenwood was laid to rest recently. The procession was led by 12 ice cream trucks playing their songs and the coffin was topped with a floral arrangement in the shape of an ice cream treat, reports London's "Daily Telegraph."

 

I found this site as the 'site of the day' on iinets homepage.. Generation 5 .. Its about AI and all sorts of intresting technology stuff

Worth a read if your into technology things..

 

Cooooool.. a Bionic eye

 

That's pretty damn cool!!

Here's a couple of weird news stories for you...

Weird News Headlines and Stories
Wiseguy Pulled The Pork Over The Mob's Eyes
NEW YORK (Wireless Flash) -- Henry Hill, notorious "Goodfella," has a secret: The wiseguys were never wise about his veal.

Corey Feldman Plans Kooky `We Are The World' Stunt
LOS ANGELES (Wireless Flash) -- Corey Feldman has a message for the masses: `Former child stars unite!"

Alien Cult Offers Job To Fired Shock Jocks
LAS VEGAS (Wireless Flash) -- The two New York radio DJs, Opie and Anthony, who were recently fired for having listeners record themselves having sex in a church, are already getting job offers.

`Hairspray' Hunk Says: "Goonies' Are Good Enough For Stage Musical'
NEW YORK (Wireless Flash) -- Stage actor Matthew Morrison is currently wowing Broadway audiences in "Hairspray" -- but he's already got other 1980s movies he wants to turn into stage musicals.

Flash Lites: Rip `N' Read Pop Culture Recap
LONDON (Wireless Flash) -- Here's a news leak from the upcoming James Bond film, "Die Another Day." During a scene featuring co-star Halle Berry emerging from the ocean, the actress was waist deep in the water when she asked for a moment to "center herself." However, a stunt scuba diver says the actress was really taking a leak.

LOS ANGELES -- Marilyn Manson recently spent the afternoon with a dying child courtesy of the MakeAWish foundation. Afterward, Manson posted on his website marilynmanson.com that he was so grateful to "Andrew" for reminding him that his songs are only "made complete by those who enjoy them" that he recorded the ailing youngster singing for his upcoming record, "The Golden Age of Grotesque" in order to "make Andrew a permanent part of history, sealed up in distortion and megabytes of plastic."

LOS ANGELES -- Courtney Love is sick of being "mowed over" by her dead husband, Kurt Cobain. Love recently posted on her message board that she's currently considering either releasing her debut solo single, "Mono," around the time the new Nirvana greatest hits package comes out or waiting until later. According to Courtney, "I don't want to be moved over by him. I'm sick of being mowed over by him."

Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs
OSAKA, Japan -- Think you hate your job? A Japanese man hated his job so much that he poisoned his co-workers with cyanide-laced sugar in hopes his boss would fire him. It worked.

MINNEAPOLIS -- Target stores across the U.S. pulled a line of clothing from its stores yesterday because its brand name "88" was deemed offensive since it's a code among neo-Nazis for "Heil Hitler." Meanwhile, in England, soccer gear manufacturer Umbro apologized for naming a sneaker "Zyklon," named similarly to Zyklon B, the crystals the Nazi's used to gas the Jews.