FF:WA The Wild World of Weird News

Discussion in 'Oceania Discussion Boards' started by FaLLeN-AnGeL, Jul 3, 2002.

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  1. leejam Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Jul 13, 2002
    hiya all...

    just another bit of really wierd stuff


    here

    edit: tried to fix the link, didn't work. copy and paste to browser. doh!!
  2. Jedi Daniel Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 7, 2000
    star 5
    Hello All

    This is one way to annoy people.

    I just found a very weird news article. In Greece, ALL electronic games including PC, Gameboy etc and even mobile phones games are now banned. They have introduced this law in an attempt to crack down on illegal gambling. Click here to view the article.
  3. Stinky_jawa Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 7, 2000
    star 4
    KILLER BISCUITS WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER

    Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, was visiting her in-laws and while there went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries.
    Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled up and with her eyes closed, with both hands behind the back of her head.

    One customer who had been at the store for a while became concerned and walked over to the car. He noticed that Linda's eyes were now open, and she looked very strange. He asked her if she was okay, and Linda replied that she'd been shot in the back of the head, and had been holding her brain in for over an hour.

    The man called the paramedics, who broke into the car because the doors were locked and Linda refused to remove her hands from her head.

    When they finally got in, they found that Linda had a wad of bread dough stuck to the back of her head.

    A Pillsbury biscuit canister had exploded from the heat, making a loud noise that sounded like a gunshot, and the wad of dough hit her in the back of the head. When she reached back to find out what it was, she felt the dough and thought it was her brains.

    She initially passed out, but quickly recovered and tried to hold her brains in for over an hour until someone noticed and came to her aid.
    And yes, Linda is a blonde.


    This was an actual article from the San Diego newspaper. lol.. ;)
  4. Jedi Daniel Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 7, 2000
    star 5
    hahahahahaha that was hilarious SJ :)

    It seems that Earth may have a 'third' moon. I didn't even know we had a second moon :p

    Click here to read more.
  5. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    First off, thankyou muchly to Hawk for unlocking this thread for me... :D

    And now, without further ado, here's more from the Wild World of Weird News... :D

    May The Force Be With Your Check Book
    Woman Changes Her Name To GoVeg.com
    World's Most Valuable Toy Hits Auction Block

    Flash Lites: Rip `N' Read Pop Culture Recap
    LOS ANGELES -- Princess Di isn't going to be a comic book heroine -- but Courtney Love is. The rocker has just signed a deal to do a "manga" comic book with a main character she describes as an "alter ego." "Variety" reports the comic, "Princess AI," will be drawn by top Japanese comic artists and follow the adventures of a troubled performer who used to be a princess.

    Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs
    SAPPORO, Japan (Wireless Flash) -- Police in Sapporo, Japan, are gravely sorry. According to the "Mainichi Daily News," the cops mistakenly sent the body of a suicidal man to the wrong parents, whose son is still alive.

    BEIJING -- China's new tourist hot spot is a decommissioned SARS hospital in Beijing. The "South China Morning Post" reports the hospital where most of the city's SARS patients were treated is now being included in tourist packages with as many as 1000 people visiting per day.

    SYDNEY, Australia -- It's surf over sex for surfers Down Under. A new survey by the Aussie surf magazine "Tracks" shows 67 percent of surfer dudes prefer surfing to sex. In addition, 51 percent have surfed in the nude and 93 percent admit they've peed in their wetsuits.
  6. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    Couple more news stories... Feel free to add your own here...

    Hollywood Needs One-Legged Stuntmen
    Coffee Roasters Brew Up Aphrodisiac Java
    Caffeine: The New Nicotine?

    Flash Lites: Rip `N' Read Pop Culture Recap
    NEW YORK -- Eminem may be foul-mouthed but he's no liar. According to a survey by Euro RSCG Worldwide, 53 percent of Americans think there's more truth in Eminem's lyrics than in George W. Bush's speeches.

    Around the Weird: Bizarre News in Briefs
    NORTH FORT MEYERS, Fla. -- It was a one-sided police standoff this weekend in Lee County, Florida. Sheriff's deputies spent four-and-a-half hours surrounding a fugitive's trailer Sunday, only to find the man wasn't inside. The southwest Florida "News-Press" reports more than 24 officers were involved in the standoff, which ended with them gassing the empty RV.

    ROME -- Mama mia, 'ats a gooda news! Italian scientists say pizza could help reduce risk of certain forms of cancer. Researchers at a Milan pharmacology center found that eating one or more pizzas a week dramatically reduce esophageal cancer and colon cancer.
  7. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    Marines Give 27-Flush Salute
    Sylvester Stallone: Guillotined In France

    Flash Lites: Rip `N' Read Pop Culture Recap
    LONDON (Wireless Flash) -- Johnny Depp's success in "Pirates Of The Caribbean" now has bookies in England touting him as the top choice for Tim Burton's reported remake of "Willy Wonka." Other actors also getting bets include Christopher Walken and Michael Keaton.
    I went searching for some truth to this, the most I have come up with so far is an Empire Magazine article.

    Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs
    VERNON HILLS, Ill. -- A late civil rights activist has fulfilled her wish to be buried in a pet cemetery. Jean Birkenstein Washington now resides beside Smokey the cat and Tippy the dog at the Aarrowood animal cemetery in Vernon Hills, Illinois. Her children, which include a columnist at the "Boston Herald" who made the story public news, acted on her request because they knew they couldn't fufill her true wish: To be buried at the zoo.

    JENSEN BEACH, Fla. -- Fighting crime can be a great stress-buster. That's what a 47-year-old landscaper in Florida discovered after tackling a robber who'd just ripped off a bank in Jensen Beach. Hero Andrew Green tells the "Palm Beach Post," "It felt great. All my frustrations just went out of my body."
  8. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    Pez Collectors Getting Personal
    World's Largest Chocolate Weighs In At 6340 Pounds - Pity it's dark chocolate
    Being A Color-Blind, Bald, Left-Handed Homosexual Man Has Evolutionary Benefits

    Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs
    SAGA, Japan (Wireless Flash) -- A Japanese farmer needs a hand now that a remote control helicopter has cut off his leg. According to the "Mainichi Daily News," the toy helicopter was being used for crop-dusting when it suddenly spun out of control and lopped off Nirichika Aoki's right leg.

    COAHUILA, Mexico -- Mexicans will begin assembling the world's largest jigsaw puzzle by the end of next month. Several civic groups in the state of Durango are behind the million-piece puzzle put-together. Once it's assembled, the puzzle will measure 430,000 square feet and spread across a dry creek bed between the cities of Torreon, Coahuila and Gomez Palacios

    BOSTON -- A Frenchman who attempted to row across the Atlantic had to call his mommy for help on his cell phone. One week after starting his journey, and 100 miles off the coast of Cape Cod, Emmanuel Coindre's rowboat capsized. After spending five hours trying to right it, he finally called his mom in France -- who called the U.S. Coast Guard.
  9. soneil Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 30, 2000
    star 4
    Wouldn't it be a bummer if that dry creek bed in Mexico suddenly beccame, well, non-dry? Bad time for a flash flood. ;)
  10. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    Pastor Church Appealing To Gen-Xers
    Cryptozoology Museum Opens

    Flash Lites: Rip `N' Read Pop Culture Recap
    LOS ANGELES (Wireless Flash) -- More proof that reality shows simply use the same people over and over. Next week, "Blind Date" will air dates featuring Toni, a recent "Paradise Hotel" reject and Robert, an Arnold Schwarzenegger soundalike who is currently a suitor on "Cupid."

    LONDON -- Reports that Gwyneth Paltrow will soon marry Coldplay singer Chris Martin are greatly exaggerated. Chris recently told a radio interviewer that wedding rumors are complete "rubbish" especially the one about "Darth Vader giving her away."

    WELLINGTON, New Zealand -- New Zealand rugby fans will be lending their cheers to the final "Lord Of The Rings" film this Saturday (Aug. 16). Sound technicians for the film are asking rugby fans attending a big game to stay afterwards to record screams and stomps that will be used in battle scenes for "Return Of The King."

    Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs
    GUAM (Wireless Flash) -- Tourism officials on the island of Guam are raising a stink aobut dirty public bathrooms. According to the "Pacific Daily News," some tourism officials are convinced that dirty public restrooms are a major reason why the Pacific island gets little repeat tourism. Authorities hope to change that by having convicted drunk drivers clean the potties and stand guard at night.

    SAN JOSE, Costa Rica -- Arnold Schwarzenegger's political gamble is paying off big for internet casinos. The BetOnSports.com is offering odds on campaign issues such as, "If Arnold loses the election, will he say, "Hasta la Vista, Baby. I'll be back" in his concession speech or dress up as The Terminator for campaign rallies.

    ORLANDO, Fla. -- Theme park employees put out an all points bulletin for a patron's missing prosthetic leg that came off during a roller coaster ride. The leg is believed to have fallen into a pond underneath the ride "Dueling Dragons," but, sadly, a dive team has been unable to locate the leg. If the leg can't be found, park officials promise to replace it.
  11. Saintheart Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2000
    star 6
    WELLINGTON, New Zealand -- New Zealand rugby fans will be lending their cheers to the final "Lord Of The Rings" film this Saturday (Aug. 16). Sound technicians for the film are asking rugby fans attending a big game to stay afterwards to record screams and stomps that will be used in battle scenes for "Return Of The King."

    I want Peter Jackson to put a filmed Orc haka as part of the additional footage on ROTK. Worth the price of the extra discs alone. :D
  12. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    Not entirely sure if I'm remembering this correctly but I believe I was told that when filming Fellowship they did do the haka while dressed as the Orcs. Unless it was hidden really well on the DVD I don't know if it was filmed or not...
  13. soneil Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 30, 2000
    star 4
    Was anyone else expecting the clone army in AOTC to do a haka? I mean an army of maoris going in to battle and not doing a haka?
  14. Grizzly Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 22, 2000
    star 4
    I recall a bit of a bunfight a couple of years ago regarding a Haka at an amatuer rugby game. The Kiwi team started the usual Haka, and one of the guys playing for the WA team who was a maori did the maori response, which was to go and eyeball the leader of the group doing it. This apparently says "you don't scare me.. go stick it..." or messages to that effect.
    The hullabullo started when the Kiwi captain said they disrespected the Haka, and if other teams were going to do that, then the Kiwis would stop doing it.
    The funny part was that they had a translation of the "story" the Ka Mate haka, and how it tells of a Maori leader during some revolution (Maori wars?)

    Edit:
    This page has a bit more info about it.
    Still pretty warrie sounding for someone who hides :D
  15. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    Roy Orbison Collector Can't Find Sunglasses

    Schwarzenegger Money Floods `Cally-Fonya'

    Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs
    OSLO, Norway -- An 81-year-old woman in Oslo, Norway thwarted a burglar who entered her bathroom by serving him a good square meal. "Aftonbladet" reports that the kindly woman then sent the would-be thief home with an umbrella and thermos of coffee before calling the police to have him arrested.

    HAVANA, Cuba -- A Havana cigar roller has set a world record after rolling out a stogie that measures 45 feet long. Cuban Jose Castelar Cairos has been making cigars for 43 years and put five days of effort into crafting the monster cigar. This isn't his first foray into the "Guinness Book of World Records:" Cairos set the first world record for longest cigar with a 35-footer in 2000.

    HALLE, Germany -- Sports sponsors come from all types of industries, including illicit ones. A German brothel called X-Carree has decided to subsidize uniforms for a female soccer team. The team's coach says players have no problems with the new outfits, which have the words, "X-Carree: Always Worth a Visit" emblazoned across the chest.

    TOKYO -- Japan's Nasu Safari Park plans to put "Zenkey" -- the world's only known living zebra-donkey hybrid -- on display later this week. The 55-pound male foal has ears like a donkey and striped legs.

    STOCKHOLM, Sweden -- Farting in front of a staff member of the Swedish National Bank can stink in more ways than one. The bank doesn't have a ban on farting in another employee's workspace, but it does have ethical guidelines. The gassy guidelines became the topic of discussion after a lawsuit erupted from a bank employee who was fired following a conflict with a co-worker who had a habit of running into his office and farting.

  16. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    Flash Lites: Rip `N' Read Pop Culture Recap
    SYDNEY, Australia (Wireless Flash) -- Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake may be reuniting -- but it's strictly for cash, not love. News.com.au reports that the former lovebirds are about to sign on to a new TV ad for the Gap clothing chain.

    HOLLYWOOD -- David Spade was able to convince ex-kiddies actors like Corey Feldman and Leif Garrett to make cameos in his new movie "Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star" -- but there was one who got away. Spade tells TV Guide Online he really wanted to land a guest spot by Fonzie. He calls the "Happy Days" high-schooler, "his favorite 35-year-old child star."

    Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs
    SENDAI, Japan (Wireless Flash) -- Farmers in Sendai, Japan, are tired of monkeys raiding their vittles that they're doing something about it. Local officials have started daily reports forecasting the presence of a roving horde of 100 macaques that are known crop plunderers. So far, farmers say the plan has worked peachy and have reduced damages to cucumbers, leeks and pumpkins.

    BERLIN -- The opera isn't exactly a singles bar, but that isn't stopping folks at Berlin's opera house from holding a special night for folks who are looking for love. Each member of the audience will wear a number, and if they see someone they like, they can leave a message for them in the lobby. According to ananova.com, managers have started the "In Search of Lost Sensuality" nights to attract a younger audience.
  17. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs
    ST. HUBERT'S ISLAND, Aus. (Wireless Flash) -- Beer was truly a life saver for one Australian teenager who was recently caught in a burning car. A good samaritan was able to reduce the flames by pouring beer on the victim.

    MEXICO CITY -- A technical glitch at a cancer charity presentation given by the first lady of Mexico left onlookers looking at pictures of naked people instead of presentation slides. A spokeswoman for Marta Sahagun tells "Las Ultimas Noticias," "We are so sorry that this incident happened, but it was due to technical reasons beyond our control."

    DUSSELDORF, Germany -- Traffic signals in Germany will chirp like birds in the near future, if one politician has his way. Mathias Uhlig says he can't stand the clicking sound that's currently emitted by lights to signal the blind, and he thinks tweeting birds will be a pleasant change. But according to the "Express" newspaper, critics say the plan has a major fault: If a real bird chirps, it might send a blind person walking in the wrong direction.
  18. Grizzly Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 22, 2000
    star 4
    Not sure how true this one might be :p
  19. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    Couple more tidbits for you...

    Bulgarian University Students Raise Stink Over Ping-Pong Table
    Costume Company Still Trying To Unload `Gore 2000' Masks

    Flash Lites: Rip `N' Read Pop Culture Recap
    NEW YORK (Wireless Flash) -- Steven Tyler will do some crazy things to impress his fans. Tyler tells "FHM" magazine that he once bet a Japanese fan $50,000 that he could eat everything in a sushi bar without throwing up. Unfortunately, he lost the bet when he tried something that "looked like someone's armpit."

    LONDON -- The phrase, "Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it," never seemed as appropriate as now. London music insiders are buzzing that a proposed Spice Girls reunion will happen next year.

    Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs
    EINDHOVEN, The Netherlands -- In the near future, folks in Holland and Germany may be able to call for medical help using their underwear thanks to a new line of clothing developed by scientists at Philips Research Laboratories in Holland. The skivvies monitor the wearer's heartbeat and are connected to a cell phone which automatically calls for an ambulance in the case of a heart attack or other emergency.

    MOSCOW -- The mummified body of Soviet leader Lenin is getting his first change of clothes in 60 years. In November, a team of scientists will outfit the mummy in a new set of civilian duds. This is the third change of clothes for Lenin's body, which was first dressed in a military uniform after he died in 1924, then put in a suit right before WWII.



    EDIT: Just fixed up the formatting so it worked... :D
  20. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    October 14, 2003 - Wireless Flash
    They Said It -- Do You Believe It?

    SAN DIEGO (Wireless Flash) -- It isn't just kids who say the darndest things: Adults are pretty good in the crazy quote department too.

    Some adults guilty of uttering odd quotes and wacky statements this week include...

    -- The vice-chairman of ophthalmology at UT Southwestern Medical Center in Dallas, who equates letting your kids wear novelty contact lenses without a doctor's prescription to "giving them the car keys without a license and without an adult in the front seat."

    -- Justin Timberlake, who shared this philosophical statement with "PopStar" magazine: "You could not be sexy brushing your teeth. That's the worst time to be sexy, you know."

    -- And, finally, there's the president of China Southern Airlines, who gave this quote about the launch of a new marketing system: "Our new TANG program is not an orange-flavored breakfast drink but a fully functional IT program which will expand China Southern Cargo."

    Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs
    MOSCOW (Wireless Flash) -- A Russian man blew up his apartment while trying to clean a pair of pants with gasoline. According to Itar-Tass news agency, the man was trying to remove a stubborn paint stain so he poured a quarter-gallon of gas into his washing machine, which caused the machine to combust.

    MERIDIAN, Miss. -- Subway pitchman Jared Fogle recently found himself in a pickle. The slimmed-down superstar was in Mississippi for an early-morning publicity appearance and could not find a restaurant where he was allowed buy a cup of coffee. It seems Jared's contract keeps him from eating at other "Quick Service Restaurants" competing with Subway, so he had to pass up spots like McDonald's, Wendy's and Pizza Hut without getting his caffeine fix. The "Washington Post" reports Jared finally caved in and bought some coffee at a quickie mart.

    BLOOMINGTON, Ind. -- Reality TV is now a topic of examination for academics. Freshman students at Indiana University in Bloomington are taking a course titled "The (Sur)Real World of Reality TV." Scholars who take the class study the reality show trend from various perspectives, including historical, psychological and ethical.
  21. BecJedi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 27, 2003
    star 3
    Lol...ah, Justin Timberlake...such wisdom for someone so annoying ;) (does his statement imply that he's sexy without a toothbrush?)

    Below is something I found that is both distrubing and rather funny at the same time. I found it on this cool site: News of the Weird.

    According to two maintenance workers on duty in Cleveland's Carver Park Estates in September, James Black, 49, either boldly or obliviously dragged a dead, bloody body out of his apartment house in broad daylight and laid it on the ground in plain sight of the two men, then calmly went back inside and emerged with a mop, which he used to swab blood from the sidewalk. The incredulous workers immediately called police, who arrested Black and the next day charged him with aggravated murder.
  22. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    PML! I'm gonna have to add that site to my list of places to check out... :D

    Here's some more stuff from the Weird News centre.

    Chef Cooks Up `Seitanic' Foods For Halloween
    Study Suggests Oprah Winfrey Causes Mental Stress
    Short-Term Psychedelics The Newest Trend

    Flash Lites: Rip `N' Read Pop Culture Recap
    LOS ANGELES -- Pamela Anderson is hoping to draw attention away from her liver and back towards her breasts. Anderson will be hosting a radio show, "Club Pam," on Sirius Satellite Radio starting today (Oct. 24) and plans to do it topless.

    NEW YORK -- The rockers of KISS have been comic book heroes and action figures; now, they're starring in a cartoon with Scooby Doo. Gene Simmons and co. will appear in animated form in "A Scooby Doo Halloween," airing tonight on the WB. Singer Paul Stanley tells TV Guide Online the program "doesn't veer towards "Hamlet" or anything," and has pretty much the same formula as every "Scooby Doo" mystery.

    SANTA MONICA, Calif. -- Eminem's latest project is a song between two dead singers. He's produced "Runnin' (Dyin' To Live)," a duet between Tupac Shakur and the Notorious B.I.G. for the new documentary, "Tupac: Resurrection." The song features news beats under old beefs and Eminem hopes it makes everyone realize how "ridiculous" their feud was, "especially since they started out as friends."

    Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs
    LONDON (Wireless Flash) -- Six British schoolboys learned the hard way about messing with prescription drugs. Each 13-year-old popped a Viagra pill at lunchtime and soon felt the effects. "The Sun" newspaper quoted a source saying: "By the time the afternoon lessons began, there was no hiding what they had done." The boys were taken to the hospital and monitored until the effects wore off and were also expelled for breaking their school's no drug policy.

    MUNCIE, Ind. -- A college student from Indiana is being accused of forging doctors notes and shaving her head to convince people she had cancer and get them to give her money. The 24-year-old Ball State University student also pretended she was deaf to get her school pay for an interpreter for her classes. She now faces charges of forgery and theft which could land her in prison for up to 15 years.
  23. Saintheart Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2000
    star 6
  24. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    First up, thanks heaps to Shara for unlocking this thread again :D

    And now, onto the weird news stories.

    From NCBuy Weird News:

    Couch Potatoes Sit Down For Olympic TV Marathon NEW YORK (Wireless Flash) -- Many people will be glued to the TV during the Olympic games, but some are hoping to set a record doing it.

    Transvestite Turns Tupperware Salesperson NEW YORK (Wireless Flash) -- Most people use Tupperware to hold leftover food but a cross-dresser in Los Angeles has stored away lots of money -- by using them as fake breasts.

    Audio CD Promises Perfect Mate Right Out Of The Box REDFORD, Mich. (Wireless Flash) -- The dateless don't have to be desperate anymore thanks to the creator of an new CD called "The Amazing Instant Mate" which launched this week.

    Flash Lites: Rip `N' Read Pop Culture Recap
    ROCHESTER, N.Y. (Wireless Flash) -- Despite the Olympics, Greece is NOT the word for U.S. vacationers. According to a Harris Poll, Greece is one of the least popular tourist destinations for Americans, beating out only China in a recent study. Meanwhile, Australia and Italy top the list as most popular destinations.

    BEVERLY HILLS, Calif. -- Where do reality TV stars go after their shows are over? Now, it's a website called TheFishBowl.com, an online network focusing on the continuing adventures of survivors of shows like "Survivor" and "The Amazing Race." Stars involved in the enterprise include aspiring "Apprentice" Katrina Camins, "Survivor" star Rob Cesterino and "Joe Millionaire" runner-up Sarah Kozer.

    Around The Weird: Bizarre News Briefs
    BOSTON (Wireless Flash) -- If you think you're hot stuff, your name may tell otherwise. A Massachusetts-based scientist did a study by putting pictures up on the website amihotornot.com where web surfers rate the photos based on looks. When linguist Amy Perfors put the same picture with two different names, users ranked male name with vowel sounds formed at the front of the mouth -- like Matt -- "hotter" than male names with vowel sounds at the back of the mouth -- like Paul. The opposite held true for women.

    NEW YORK -- A Martha Stewart make-over is in the making. The website worth1000.com held a contest asking for photoshop images of how the amateur artists might improve Stewart's prison cell for her during her five-month visit. Entries range from a cell decorated to look like a bathroom with "Hers and Hers" towels, to an electric chair with hand-painted flowers on the seat. A feature of the entries will appear in the next issue of "Star" magazine.

    ST. LOUIS -- St. Louis's health commissioner has apologized to two local girls, age 10 and 12, after one of the city's inspectors shut down their lemonade stand for operating without a business license. Health honcho Melba Moore says the kiddie crackdown was a mistake and the city will make exceptions to its food and beverage vendor permit rules in the case of kids' lemonade stands. According to the "St. Louis Dispatch," Moore also bought a 25-cent glass of lemonade from the girls and left them a $2.75 tip.

    LONDON -- Female British Olympic triathletes have had to install "modesty panels" into their bathing suits after discovering the white Lycra fabric becomes transparent in water. The team's seamstress sewed extra layers of fabric onto the chests of 16 suits which will be worn in competition, reports London's "Sun" tabloid.

    - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

    I think that's enough for now. I'll be back with more tomorrow. :D
  25. FaLLeN-AnGeL Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2001
    star 4
    Today's stories come from the Darwin Awards...

    2003 Honorable Mentions
    The Last Laugh (January 2003, Virginia) Paul Powell is not yet out of the gene pool but he will be soon, thanks to his own efforts to enable prosecutors to prove a capital murder charge against him...

    2003 Darwin Awards
    Workin' at the Car Wash (29 January 2003, Brazil) At work, Manoel Messias Batista Coelho was responsible for cleaning out the storage tanks of gasoline tanker trucks. He had been employed in that capacity for two months when he ran afoul of fuel...

    Love Struck (3 March 2002, Sheffield, England) As Kim Fontana, 32, and Paul Cowley, 40, left the pub, they noticed that a streetlight was burned out, creating an attractive pool of darkness on the road. Unable to rein in their passion, they began to canoodle on the asphalt outside the pub...

    Urban Legends
    These apocryphal stories are included
    as examples of herculean Darwinian efforts.
    Be glad, be very glad, these people don't exist.


    The Bricklayer: This man was in an accident at work, so he filled out an insurance claim. The insurance company contacted him and asked for more information. This was his response.

    Bizarre Death: At the 1994 annual awards dinner given for Forensic Science, AAFS, President Dr. Don Harper Mills astounded his audience with the legal complications of a bizarre death. Here is the story.

    Unfortunate Husband II: This guy pushed his motorcycle from the patio into his living room, where he began to clean the engine with some rags and a bowl of gasoline, all in the comfort of his own home. Read the rest of the story here

    Cow Bomb (California) A dairy worker who heard that bovine flatulence was largely composed of methane, and potentially explosive, decided to apply the scientific method to the theory. While one of his contented cow charges was hooked up to the milking machine, he waited for the slight tail lift which dairy workers know signals an impending expulsion, generally something to avoid. Our hero struck a match. His satisfaction at seeing the resulting foot-long blue flame lasted mere seconds, before the flame was subsumed by a rectal contraction.
    The poor Holstein exploded, killing the worker who was struck by a flying femur bone.


    EDIT: Fixed up the links so they actually point to the right pages.
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