Before "The Will of the Force" UPDATED 06/12/11 Dear Diary Challenge Qui-Gon Jinn

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by The1stJediPrincess, Jan 1, 2011.

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  1. Valairy Scot Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5
    Well, if you're serious, I meant where you write Qui's diary & another writer writes Obi's diary. It's largely the same events, definitely in the same time span, but from different POVs. That would mean the head honcho writer (you) would write a post like this and the coordinating writer would confirm what actually happened objectively, then post the other character's subjective opinion of the same event - they might overlap or not - like Obi-Wan might focus on the humiliation, or the correction, or blow it off (well, that last not likely).

    Two writers did that on a short (3 chapters?) post Obi-Siri breakup. Dianethx was one of the two writers. I could try to find the link...
    here it is:

    Letting Go
  2. The1stJediPrincess Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 20, 2010
    star 2
    Ohhhh, that sounds great! Are you interested in the job???? [face_batting]

    Or if another talented writer would like to think about this, let me know with a PM. [:D]
  3. Nyota's Heart Combos & Paragraphs Host

    Game Host
    Member Since:
    Aug 31, 2004
    star 6
    Skylar is 100% correct in her statements and in her conclusion.

    When you lock your heart away in stone barricades, you lock away the pain but also the joy and affection.

    And since Obi-Wan was taken from his birth family, I definitely think he needs a father as well as an instructor.

    And I think your and Val's idea about counterpointing diaries is cool!

    =D=

    :D
  4. Falcon Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Feb 7, 2002
    star 8
    Poor Obi-Wan. That must've embarrassed him when he realized that Qui-Gon had attracted a crowd. Not the best way to go about things either

    More soon
  5. anakin_girl Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 2000
    star 6
    Wow. I never come in Before the Saga and I'm glad I did. It's been awhile since I read any of the JA books and I had forgotten about the river stone and Obi-Wan's 13th birthday.

    Love the way you've written Qui-Gon here, and poor Obi-Wan, getting scolded in public like that. :( (Um, yeah, chill out, Qui. Not cool at all.)

    Great job. :)
  6. The1stJediPrincess Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 20, 2010
    star 2
    Valairy_Scot: Thank you for your kind words. :) Thank you also for writing Obi-Wan?s POV. I loved your first entry! [face_love]

    obimom: Qui-Gon is being rather wooden and cold. [face_tired] It will be a few more entries before he comes out of his ice shell. Thank you for reading! [:D]

    Gikilkenny: Thank you!:cool: Yes, Qui-Gon needs to learn. [face_laugh]

    early bird-obi-wan: Qui-Gon will not start being friendly until it is almost too late. [face_mischief] Thanks! [:D]

    Jade_eyes: Yes, Obi-Wan needs more then just an ?instructor?. [face_thinking] Qui will figure that out?eventually. ;)

    JediFalcon: I know, our poor Obi-Wan. [face_worried] For Force sake Qui?give the kid a hug or something! ;)

    anakin_girl: Thanks for reading! [:D] Glad you came in. [face_dancing]

    Special Thanks to Valairy_Scot for writing Obi-Wan's POV in "Hello There"
    Thanks Val!
    [:D] [face_dancing]


    Entry 4

    I never did apologize to Obi-Wan regarding my recent public admonishment and he has not mentioned it. He continues to be a dutiful padawan, exceeding expectations in all he does. I looked over Obi-Wan?s report last evening. He received very high marks in all of his subjects. I was surprised to see that he had a full workload and some classes were very advanced for his age. He looked at me with hopeful eyes, and I simply said, ?I expect you to do well every report.?

    I watched the disappointment wash over his face and was pleased to see how quickly his schooled his features back to neutral. He took his data card back, bowed to me, and replied, ?Of course, Master. I will do my meditations now.? He then disappeared to his room, where he stayed all evening. I don?t know if he ate or not, but if he was old enough to be in some of the most advanced courses offered by the Temple, he was old enough to get himself something to eat.

    I can sense Obi-Wan yearns for affection. I?m willing to provide all the tools and training necessary for him to be a powerful Jedi one day. However, affection is not something I am prepared to offer. It is simply not a necessary part in a Master and Padawan relationship. I respect Master Dooku immensely, however, affection and warmth was not a part of our relationship.

    Skylar has reminded me several times that I was demonstrative in love when I trained her. She has also reminded me I was devoted with Tahl. She crosses her arms and tells me I need to put Xanatos away for good and bring back her old Master. She also has shared something with me that should have disturbed me greatly, yet it did not.

    ?Master, talk to that boy. I see a little bit of him die each day just trying to be good enough for you. You can?t continue to punish him for Xanatos. He will break if you continue to do things the way you are.?

    The comment does trouble me somewhat, but I?m very good at dismissing things and releasing them into the Force. I know I would be lying if I said I have not noticed the spark in Obi-Wan?s eyes fading more each day. That is Obi-Wan?s failing, not my own. He needs a firm hand and excellent instruction. I will train him well, that is my obligation?My only obligation.

    Obi-Wan wants to be a Jedi. The life he has chosen is not easy and usually without reward. I need him to see that the galaxy is not always a fair and friendly place. The best way for me to do that is to be the boy?s teacher. Not his friend and certainly not his father. Attachments are not forbidden, yet they are not encouraged either. I was attached to Xanatos and Xani betrayed me. When I look into Obi-Wan?s hopeful eyes, I can?t help but see the potential of Obi-Wan betraying me as well. I will be committed to my duty as a teacher and mentor. I refuse to be more.

    My heart tells me I may regret that decision, yet my mind tells me it is the correct one.

    QGJ



  7. Valairy Scot Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5
    Oh, Qui - you blind man. Or deaf, I'm not sure. The Force is telling you what you need to do, but no, Mr. Obstinate, you know better.

    Okay, so it's old pain...you're a Jedi. Get over it, eventually - release the pain.

    There, I feel better now. You?

    (For the author, well done!)
  8. obimom Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 31, 2010
    star 4
    Now Qui-Gon, listen to your heart, not your head, you big lummox [face_frustrated]

    Poor Obi-Wan!! :_| A little of him dies each day because he's trying so hard to be good enough? Waaaa!!

    I hope Skylars advice reaches Qui-Gon soon, or what will Obi-wan do? :_|

    So happy to see your post finally, now I can't wait for Val's response! [face_dancing]
  9. anakin_girl Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 2000
    star 6
    Qui-Gon, to Skylar you listen. [face_shame_on_you]

    Poor Obi-Wan. :_| How heartbreaking.

    Great job on this. :)
  10. Nyota's Heart Combos & Paragraphs Host

    Game Host
    Member Since:
    Aug 31, 2004
    star 6
    Excellent post =D=

    One day Obi-Wan won't try anymore -- :( :( with anyone and everyone he meets and his long-time friends as well.

  11. Gkilkenny Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4
    Will Skylar's words register in that thick head of Qui-Gon's before Obi-Wan gives up believing he is worthy to be a Jedi.

    Qui-Gon is doing the damage but won't take the responsibility. Shame on you Qui-Gon.[face_shame_on_you]

    Poor Obi-Wan:_|

  12. Falcon Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Feb 7, 2002
    star 8
    Poor Obi-Wan, no wonder he was so strict with Anakin. I can't wait for more :)
  13. dimyavie Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 3, 2006
    star 1
    I enjoy reading this look into Qui's thoughts. His descriptions of Obi-Wan (and why he's keeping his distance) are intriguing and I look forward to reading more! I'm going to apologize in advance if I'm slow in replying to updates - grad school owns me at the moment.

    Thanks for sharing!!!
  14. The1stJediPrincess Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 20, 2010
    star 2
    Thank you to everyone who is reading and reviewing! I will personally thank you in the next post. [:D]

    I?m on my way home to the Jedi Temple for the first time in two weeks. I decided to do a solo mission to oversee some peace talks at a planet in the mid-rim. It was a simple enough mission and my sole purpose was to witness the peace treaty going into effect.

    While the mission was straightforward and uncomplicated, I?m looking forward to returning home and seeing my Padawan. I?ve been told that I need to sit down with him and have a heart to heart talk with him about the true reasons he was left behind for this mission.

    He thinks it is because he was fighting with Bruck Chun again. A day before my mission, I was summoned to the training room. Obi-Wan stood there, his eyes cast toward the floor, a large bruise under his right eye. To the right of him was Bruck, with his trademark never ending smirk on his face.

    Obi-Wan looked at me with trepidation. He bowed respectfully toward me as I turned my attention to the instructor who had found them fighting.

    ?Master Jinn, I will leave Obi-Wan?s punishment to your good judgment,? she then turned her attention to Bruck, ?Initiate Chun, we will see the Council for your punishment.?

    Obi-Wan followed me in silence back to our apartment. Even with his strong shields, I could feel anxiety and foreboding coursing through him. We passed two of his friends on our way to the apartment.

    Garen Muln asked Obi-Wan to go swimming with them. I did not give Obi-Wan the chance to answer, I plainly said in a firm tone that outside of class, Obi-Wan was confined to our quarters for two weeks.

    Obi-Wan?s cheeks were red from embarrassment and young Bant gave him a reassuring smile. We continued on, me in the front, and my padawan two steps behind me to my left. This is the proper way for a master/padawan team to walk, even though Skylar tells me it is far too stiff and unnecessary in casual circumstances. She was kind enough to point out that I never walked that way with her, or even Xanatos. I did not tell her it is because of Xanatos that I am this way. Something tells me she already knows.

    Once we were inside our apartment, I placed my hand on Obi-Wan?s chin and raised his face up so I could examine the bruise under his eye. I felt Obi-Wan stiffen to my touch, and did not understand why, since I would never physically strike him. I instructed him to go to the refresher and put some bacta cream on the contusion.

    He did as his was told, Obi-Wan always did as he was told, but his shoulders were slumped. When he returned to the living area, I informed him of my solo mission. His eyes grew wide at the thought of not accompanying me. I did not tell him it was because this would be a boring and tedious mission and I would rather him not lose valuable class instruction. I allowed him to think he was being punished because of his actions.
    He attempted to explain his actions with Bruck, although I was not in the mood for excuses and I promptly sent him to his room for meditations.

    It was common knowledge that Bruck Chun was a bully who delighted in antagonizing my apprentice. What Obi-Wan needed to do was rise above that and not be affected by the actions of another. I did not take the time to counsel him of his actions and controlling his feelings. Perhaps I should.

    QGJ
  15. earlybird-obi-wan Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 21, 2006
    star 6
    Yes another update:)

    And Qui-Gon should be more of a friend to poor Obi-Wan
  16. serendipityaey Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 24, 2004
    star 4
    Poor Obi-Wan, but it is an important lesson to learn, he's much better than that :) I like the insight into Qui-Gon's thoughts on teaching methods. Nice job :D
  17. Valairy Scot Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5
    Oh, my! Rubs hands in glee - you make this so easy on my end.

    Som is Qui softening up some? It sounds like he's willing to talk.

    I might just break up Obi's response into several over Qui's 2 wk absence. More angst that way. ;)


  18. Nyota's Heart Combos & Paragraphs Host

    Game Host
    Member Since:
    Aug 31, 2004
    star 6
    Great update and it is :( that Obi-wan seems to flinch -- doesn't expect affectionate gestures apparently [face_thinking]

    His open-hearted nature is starting to turn away and lose hope of warmth and affection. [face_worried]

  19. obimom Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 31, 2010
    star 4
    REad this earlier, was unable to leave comment...darn computer.

    Great update...poor Obi-Wan. Hope Qui-Gon can clear things up with him..after he clears things up with himself, that is. ;)

    Can't wait till Vals response!! [face_dancing]
  20. anakinfansince1983 Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 4, 2011
    star 7
    Perhaps I should.

    Yeah, Qui-Gon, perhaps you should.

    Really? "Allowing" Obi-Wan to think he's being punished? Grrr...

    Great update. :) I'm ready to smack Qui-Gon, but that's probably the intention. :p
  21. Gkilkenny Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4
    It is sad that Skylar and Xanatos were on the good side of Qui-Gon and he can't see the good in Obi-Wan.
  22. nada_smith Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 8, 2006
    star 1
    I'm glad Qui-Gon realizes Bruck is a bully, but it's sad and bad :p that he treated Obi-Wan so coolly anyway. A talk with Obi-Wan about how to manage his emotions would do more good than just instilling shame in the boy. Of course Qui-Gon's just trying to avoid his mistakes with Xanatos. Too bad sometimes avoiding old mistakes just leads us into new ones. Hope he's ready to have that talk with Obi-Wan now.

    Good job with the diary! I'll enjoy seeing how this develops. :)

    Oh, and Valairy, if you see this know that I'm definitely for more posts and more angst. Always more posts and more angst. :D
  23. The_Nerfherder Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Sep 19, 2010
    star 1
    Nice, The1stJediPrincess. =D= Sad, but nice.
  24. Tevase2 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 12, 2011
    star 1
    Poor, poor obi wan :_|
    Qui Gon never really did show any affection to him:rolleyes:

    Can't wait to read more =D=
  25. The1stJediPrincess Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 20, 2010
    star 2
    I?m off to Milwaukee, WI for 6 days. Hope you like this next installment! O:)

    earlybird-obi-wan:
    Qui-Gon does need to be more of a friend to Obi-Wan, I agree. [face_peace]

    Serendipityaey: Thank you, yes, Obi-Wan is much better then that. [face_batting]


    Valairy_Scot:Yes, Qui-Gon is softening up a bit, but he is just too proud to admit.[:D]


    Jade_eyes: Thank you! Yes, Obi-Wan?s good nature is fading away.:)

    obimom: Thank you. Eventually things get cleared up, after all the angst that is.[:D]

    Anakinfansince1983: Yep, Qui-Gon does need a good smack upside the head.

    Gkilkenny:
    Thank you. Yes, Obi-Wan is getting the short end of the stick.

    nada_smith: Qui-Gon realizes that Bruck is a bully, he is just not willing to give Obi-Wan a pass. You are so right in saying ?avoiding old mistakes just leads us into new ones,? which Qui-Gon will find out.

    nerf_herder: Thank you. I hope you like next part.[face_dancing]

    Tevase2: Don?t worry, Qui-Gon will show Obi-Wan some affection?eventually. ;)




    Entry 5

    My former padawan, Skylar contacted me tonight. She wanted me to know that she had lifted Obi-Wan?s confinement so he could have dinner with her and her own padawan, Zac. Skylar was quick to inform me that Obi-Wan had been a model student the entire time I have been away. I expected no less, but did not tell her that.

    Skylar had informed me that her husband and his padawan had recently left on a mission. I could tell she was concerned and pointed that out. Skylar admitted that something did not feel ?right? about this mission, and she was working on releasing her anxieties into the Force. She then quickly turned my attention back to Obi-Wan.

    ?He is a wonderful boy, Master,? Skylar pointed out to me. ?Yet he is unsure of his place in the galaxy and unsure of his place with you.?

    ?Obi-Wan is an able apprentice,? I agreed with her. ?However, the galaxy is a cruel place that he must be prepared for.?

    Even over the hologram, I could hear her sigh and see the disapproval in her eyes, ?You are his Master. He should not be reminded of the cruelness of the galaxy while he is with you.?

    I was slightly offended; however, I know deep down she is right, ?I have never mistreated Obi-Wan.?

    ?Not physically, I know that,? Skylar replied to me in her bold tone. ?However, you have not opened up to him and he is retreating into a shell. I simply wish for you to come around before something happens you both will regret.? She ended the transmission and I was left to my thoughts.

    I decided to contact Obi-Wan. I had only done so once since I have arrived. His eyes were bright when he saw me as he gave me a full report of the last ten days. It seemed he had won three sparring matches, one in his age group and two in the age group above him. Pride crept up inside of me, for I know that Obi-Wan is excellent with his lightsaber. I quickly tampered down those feelings, not wishing for pride to blind me of the boy?s faults.

    He had done what I had commanded and returned to our apartment every day after his classes were over. He meekly admitted having dinner with Skylar and Zac and was quick to point out that he had tried to decline, but Skylar had insisted.

    Obi-Wan then told me that Skylar was worried for Thoran and Kaleb. When I asked him if she had told him that, he replied, ?No, I just feel it.?

    I was impressed he had noticed that during their time together. It is evident that Obi-Wan has an uncanny way of caring for others over himself. I almost let down my barriers at that point, but chose against it. I simply told him, ?Do your lessons and go to bed. I will be home in a few days.?

    I felt a slight twinge of guilt when I saw some of the brightness; actually, all of the brightness leave his eyes. He gave a slight bow and responded, ?Yes, Master. Safe journey, May the Force be with you.?

    I nodded and ended the transmission. Obi-Wan is proving to be a stellar student. Sk
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