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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

The Wrong Reason (New JA Story) AUTHOR'S NOTES (1/31)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Jedi_Joon, Nov 2, 2001.

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  1. juwannajedi

    juwannajedi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 23, 2000
    nice posts. I do like Wes.
     
  2. Lonewolf89

    Lonewolf89 Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2001
    Man, Obi didn't win. Well, at least it was close. Great post!!


     
  3. KenobisGirl

    KenobisGirl Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 10, 2001
    That was cool! Really cool fight scene!

    More soon please! :)
     
  4. Healer Apprentice Lina

    Healer Apprentice Lina Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 1, 2000
    thanks guys!
    Glad to see everyone liking Wes. He's a pure Jedi Joon character so all credit goes to her.

    I happily hand over the next post responsibility to Joon!
     
  5. Jedi_Joon

    Jedi_Joon Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 1, 2001
    Thanks HAL!
    Of course...I've got the mega-hard one coming up btwn. Lewix and Neela. And then I get the nice job of writing the Obi/Qui one. So much to dooooooooooooo......
     
  6. Jedi_Joon

    Jedi_Joon Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 1, 2001
    It was strange the things first perceptions did to Lewix. Whenever he saw Neela Halcouri, she was always either crying or close to it. So, he half expected her to be doing one or the other when he finally found her in the Meditation Gardens of the Temple. But to his surprise, she was not.

    The dark haired padawan sat on a stone bench, her legs folded up in a lotus position, though she was not meditating. She remained shielded as she always did but the aura around her was different. Calmer and even slightly more centered. At the sound of his approach, she looked up.

    "You didn't come back after classes," said Lewix to the inquiring eyes.

    "Was I supposed to come back right away?" asked Neela, not sounding annoyed but merely curious.

    "Umm..no. But, I was just concerned, I suppose."

    Neela didn't break eye contact with him. "I said I wasn't going to try anything like that again. It was a mistake," she said, coldly.

    Lewix nodded. "I know, Neela. I was concerned you might be upset," he replied, though the thought had entered his mind that the girl might try something.

    The slender girl faced back out to the wide span of the gardens as Lewix sat down at the other end of the bench. Again, her face startled Lewix. It was hard to believe this girl was only fifteen. She had the weathered, wary look of someone nearly twice that age, though her features still remained youthful. Then again, Damaeo had told him he had looked similiar upon his return from the Wars.

    "You have found my favorite area," commented Lewix to their surroundings.

    "Sorry?"

    Lewix gestured around them. "The Meditation Gardens. I used to spend the bulk of my time here."

    "I know," said Neela, quietly.

    That surprised the older Jedi. "You do?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

    "Master Damaeo used to come here a lot too. He would always say though every other month or so that he was coming here to help out a friend. He must have meant you," answered the girl, lightly.

    Lewix remained still, startled by the quick and correct conclusion she had reached. Her files were right. She was very intuitive and bright. "You're right," he replied. "Your Master used to counsel me often here," confided Lewix. "He was enough years older than me and wiser than I."

    "Counsel you? I thought you were the mind healer?" asked Neela, looking honestly surprised.

    Lewix smiled at her, his eyes mixed with a gentle sadness. "I used to be. I stopped when I was rather young. Not much longer after I returned from the last of the Sith wars."

    Neela's grey eyes looked back at him with a new clarity, as if discerning him a second time. They were quite different from the ones that had looked up at him with such distrust back in the infirmary room. "How old are you?" she asked.

    "I am twenty-two," answered Lewix. That seemed to startle Neela.

    "You don't look it," the girl returned, not trying to be insulting. Lewix only smiled. "How old were you when you went to the wars then? Nineteen?"

    "I celebrated my 20th birthday over there," said Lewix, his smile turning sardonic. "I had gone with my Master on a short mission to treat the wounded there. It was only supposed to last a few weeks and turned into a few months."

    Neela studied Lewix's features with great scrutiny. "Did he die there?" she guessed.

    The other Jedi breathed out a short puff of air with a grim countenance. "No...not physically. But he was captured. He was missing for a few weeks. And when we finally found him..." Lewix's voice trailed off his eyes narrowed in memory, not looking at Neela. "He was damaged mentally. The healers here suggested I try to reach him with our bond."

    Over the couple of years, Lewix had done a fairly good job of distancing himself further with the last images he had of his Master, who had once been so sharp of mind and fearless. The dark-haired Knight had worked hard to bury the vision of the frail old man who seemed not to recognize anything around him and fear even his own shadow. And while he had been reluctant to share such thoughts with Damaeo who had pa
     
  7. Jane Jinn

    Jane Jinn Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 12, 2000
    Ooh, I liked that! Very nice insight into Lewix's past, and a very nice differentiation between justice and revenge. I didn't realise Lewix was so young. I pictured him closer to thirty. Sounds like he and Neela are getting closer, whether they realise it (or want to) or not.

    The scene with the sparring match was good, too. I liked the way Wes won--finally. But Obi-Wan put up a good fight, and his comment about winning next time sounded well-founded somehow.
     
  8. Healer Apprentice Lina

    Healer Apprentice Lina Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 1, 2000
    Take a bow Joon! You did well on the angst!
     
  9. Lonewolf89

    Lonewolf89 Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2001
    'I don't see him anywhere'

    Nice touch, Joon. Post soon!


     
  10. TheSwedishJedi

    TheSwedishJedi Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 15, 2001
    Good. Good.

    More. More.

    ~Swede (Swede) [face_laugh]
     
  11. Jedi_Joon

    Jedi_Joon Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 1, 2001
    thanks for the replies, everyone! Well, you don't count HAL since you write for this thing. ;)

    But thanks to Jane, Lonewolf and SwedishJedi! Jane, you're feed back was SO nice and LONG! I love long replies!

    Okay, next post should be from HALLY. I vote she does the Obi/Qui scene! Hee, hee....
     
  12. Amidelta

    Amidelta Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Aug 8, 2001
    Hmm, now we're getting under the surface a little...

    Great post, Jedi_Joon! You, too, HAL!

    More, more, MORE!!!


    ~Amidelta~
     
  13. Jedi_Joon

    Jedi_Joon Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 1, 2001
    Ok, alteration of plans, I'll be doing the next post.

    I realize that we need to actually get on with the...you know, MISSION part of this story really soon. And we will...just after I do a few more things.
     
  14. juwannajedi

    juwannajedi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 23, 2000
    Good post. I like these new characters! :D
     
  15. Jedi_Joon

    Jedi_Joon Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 1, 2001
    thanks guys.
    new post is on its way.
     
  16. Jedi_Joon

    Jedi_Joon Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 1, 2001
    Okay, this post is kind of bad but it's one that gets the ball going.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Neela had thought and rethought the situation over several times. Before leaving, Master Damaeo had told her a few things about the case. Or in the least, the prisoner exchange. The idea of a prisoner exchange needing to be supervised had always puzzled Neela. She would have thought with the practical army of guards surrounding the event, the presence of a Jedi Master would hardly do anything. But apparently it was to be a very important one.

    The leader of the Civil liberties party had taken hold of the daughter of one of the most important senators on Goliathan. In exchange for her safe return, they had demanded the release of General Talib. Talib had been with the Civil liberties fight for the whole of his life. He was a figure. An icon. And the party wanted their icon back.

    It was supposed to be a simple exchange. A simple mission. Until Master Damaeo had gotten mysteriously murdered.

    There had been evidence of a fight but no clues of any kind. The Goliathan government had been disturbed but could offer no true investigation due to the upcoming prisoner exchange. But Neela knew better than to believe that. They were offering no investigation because they didn't want to dwell on it. It wasn't so important to them that an outsider had died. Just as long as they got what they wanted.

    But she wasn't about to let it go so soon.

    The day Lewix had told her that Master Jinn and his apprentice had been chosen to take over the mission in two days time, Neela had been working hard on outside research and on coming up with a plan.

    Somewhere inside of her mind, Neela could hear Lewix tell her again that Jedi never sought revenge but justice. The words tugged at Neela and yet her determination would not loosen it's hold on her either.

    True, Jedi do not seek revenge. But this is justice. Proper justice.

    With that thought, Neela held her eyes carefully on the two figures in the control tower of the docking bay. It was nearly midnight and the shift change should be happening soon. It would give her all of two minutes to run into the shuttle. Lifting her traveling cloak over her head, she tightened her shields around her and moved forward as the guards began their shift change....only to have someone grab her shoulder.

    Neela felt herself be spun around and half-carried to the side behind another docked shuttle. Just as the girl was ready to belt the person who had a hold on her, she heard a familiar voice whisper sharply in her ear. "Are you out of what is left of your mind?!"

    It was Wes.

    "Let go! You're going to get me caught!" she hissed back.

    "You ARE caught, kiddo," Wes retorted, pushing the hood back from her head. His dark eyes were even darker now, the pupils having dilated to such a point they gave his face a demonic look. It would have frightened most but not Neela. "Force, I had REALLY hoped I was wrong about my guess," he said. But seeing her now he knew he had been unfortunaely right. Neela's hair now lay cut raggedly on her head, so short that it was not much longer than Wes' own shaggy hair. With Neela's own slightly tanned complexion, shortish stature and now the new haircut, she could pass off as a typical Goliathan female.

    Neela finally managed to wrench her arm from his grasp and looked at her friend with cold eyes that locked on to his assessing ones. "Well, you're right. Now I have to get going-"

    "Neela," Wes interrupted, drawing in a breath for a long argument. "You...you can't be serious," he managed.

    "I am," said the girl, her eyes unwavering.

    "The Council will have you kicked out!" he protested.

    "I'm going to Goliathan!" she whispered, fiercely.

    "So you can get yourself killed along with Master Damaeo?" he demanded.

    "I'm going in honor of his memory!"

    Wes' expression was uncharacteristically fierce he regarded her. "You are going for revenge," he said, bluntly.

    The remark stung Neela but she didn't give up, nor did she glance away from the bot
     
  17. Lonewolf89

    Lonewolf89 Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2001
    She cut her BRAID!!! Has she lost her mind!! Wes is acting pretty stupid too. Post soon!!!


     
  18. Jane Jinn

    Jane Jinn Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 12, 2000
    Desperate times call for desperate measures. I'm not surprised Neela cut her braid, and I really liked the way that Wes was able to feel the absense of Master Damaeo a little bit, too. The situation remains a mystery, though; why should a Jedi Master not seem to have any special importance at the exchange, and yet be important enough to get killed? I do hope Neela can find out something as she goes undercover. Or will Obi-Wan or even Qui-Gon discover her next? It wasn't a bad post at all. I thought it was well-written.
     
  19. Jedi_Joon

    Jedi_Joon Jedi Master star 3

    Registered:
    Nov 1, 2001
    The next post should now be HAL's. I think she's planning on having it up before Thanksgiving but I'm sure not certain. But I bet the faster we get replies, the better chance we have of a post. And did I mention it was one w/Qui and Obi? :D A little readership swaying here. Hee, hee.
     
  20. Healer Apprentice Lina

    Healer Apprentice Lina Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 1, 2000
    How right you are Joon!
    Right, so yes, the next post will have an amused Qui-Gon, a tired Obi-Wan and later will have some fun stuff regarding Lewix and Wes. Well, not FUN for them but fun for ME to write and...okay, nevermind, I'm just off on another track now.....
     
  21. ewen

    ewen Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 11, 2001
    HEY!that was not a bad post at all,infact I thought it was very good,but as most of you know about me I am always waiting for QUI/OBI.Not the writers fault,I drool alot,waiting for those two.PEACE Ewen
     
  22. TheSwedishJedi

    TheSwedishJedi Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 15, 2001
    Oh.... Poor girl. She's just so lost.

    Good. Can't wait for more.

    ~Swede :p
     
  23. juwannajedi

    juwannajedi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 23, 2000
    wow. what a good post.
     
  24. Cheryl_Kenobi

    Cheryl_Kenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    May 6, 2001
    poor poor girl... anyway post soon :)
     
  25. Healer Apprentice Lina

    Healer Apprentice Lina Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 1, 2000
    Well, I just got my butt kicked in my biochem. exam. I guess that means someone will have to pay for it...mainly the characters. *Evil Laughter*

    I'll try and have something up later tonight or tomorrow.

     
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