Things we couldn't say before

As we all know, TCW has introduced some pretty out-there stuff into the Star Wars universe. In this thread, let's make a list of outrageous-sounding things we couldn't have known pre-2008. I'll go first:

During the Clone Wars, Black Sun allied themselves with the Mandalorians, a resurrected Darth Maul, and Maul's steroid-enhanced brother to attack Jabba's palace on Tatooine.

 

Anakin discovered he was the Chosen One, took control of the embodiments of the Light and Dark side of the Force, dueled his Padawan who died and then came back to life... met Qui-Gon Jinn, saw the future of him destroying Alderaan and becoming Darth Vader, turned to the Dark Side and then left to attack the Citadel.

 

Jabba has a son nicknamed Stinky, whose real name is Rotta (Rot... Stinky... Really?). Jabba also has a purple, effeminate uncle that speaks basic and sounds like Truman Capote.

 

Even Piell didn't survive the Clone Wars.

 

Anakin having a padawan

 

Adi Gallia was killed by a couple of horn-headed, lightsaber-wielding CRAZIES!

 

Sy Snootles had a romantic affair with a Hutt.

 

Grievous only killed one Jedi, a Gungan, a few Clones, a few already dead witches and their Grandma.

 

Darth Tyranus has some snug pyjamas.

 

There would be an episode where a character more despised than Jar-Jar would appear. (Gascon...)

 

Take that back!

 

No wonder he was no good at politics.

 

This is more an overall synopsis of mine, but it contains some weird **** I never expected to happen upon announcement in 2006.

Anakin has a Padawan, and the guy from the Death Star in ANH is there and then we add some cool Y-Wings for fun and then JAr Jar becomes a Jedi! And Grievous actually wanted to be a Jedi, that's why he is a cyborg - also Kit Fisto has this badass Padawan, And then Anakin and Padme have lots of adventures - in spite of their separation - and then there's this crazy German dude living underground and then everything's okay. Dooku somehow gets overwhelmed by a Monkey Lizard and taken hostage, so Jar Jar becomes a general. Finally the Senate is held up and people get shot.

And then Ahsoka saves the Temple from intruders and then the Republic invades Geonosis....again. And then Ahsoka dies, but she's okay because she freezes some zombies on a ship. Eeth Koth is actaully alive, but Grievous captures him. And also a clone deserts the GAR despite being programmed to being loyal. Mandalore is next but now they're actually a planet of pacifists and Obi-Wan has boned their leader. Then Boba has a cute arc.

Next comes a return to Mandalore, but there's CORRUPTION. Padme is under threat, too. Her handmaiden doesn't have power, which is hugely important. Next comes a high Quinlan Vos who, with Obi, chases a highly effeminate Hutt across the galaxy. Also Ventress is actually a Nightsister and there's lots of Zabrak Nightbrothers as well. Also Ani, 'Soka and Obi go to a physical conduit of the Force, which is fun. Qui-Gon and Shmi are actually there, which is fun. Next up is Even Piell's first and only appearance, because he is killed off by a dog. Tarkin is there too, looking identical to his ANH self bar his hair colour. Next up 'Soka meets and saves the Galaxy Chewbacca, whom only she can understand.

Ackbar appears and Padme is on Mon Cala (a new planet), too. Tikkes doesn't, however, appear. This is just like the micro series' battle, only worse. Then Grievous is overwhlemed by Gungans after allying himself with a illiterate Gungan. Anakin also duels Dooku again. R2 and Threepio borrow some of Vos' drugs and go on a magical wanderlust. Later some clones kill a dark Jedi on a world without sunlight, with no consequences. Later Dooku develops a serious illness, which burns his chest something bad. Also Darth Maul survived being cut in half and tumbling down a fathomless shaft because of his anger. His brother finds him and then they attack Obi and Ventress.

Maul and his brother then kill Adi Gallia, because 'why not?', and 'Soka becomes an expert Jedi youngling trainer. Also she purposely doesn't save her love opponent, though it's probably because she was so bland, (much like the arc she starred in). Finally 'Soka holds her own against Grievous, too.

Some droids don't know what the **** they're doing for four episodes, and neither do we.

Darth Maul, who by now has more Jedi kills than Grievous on the show, appears on Mandalore and kills the pacifists....

 

Maul knows more than 2 words

 

Kowakian Monkey Lizards have learned to drive tanks

 

Mandalorians, the most well known militarist expansionist nation in galactic history, spent seven hundred years as peace loving hippies before getting the crap kicked out of them by a man who once thought he was Spider Gollum.

 

Oh no you didn't! =/

Ummm... Hondo flying.

 

Darth Maul is a lion, not a zabrak.

 

Adi Gallia isn´t killed by Grievous but by the brother of darth maul who recived magic steroids from a nightsister

 

Grievous being taken down by Gungans.

A new octopus/mushroom species.

Talking frogs.

 

Boba Fett's Slave-1 gets its classic paint job by Hondo...using his OWN OUTFIT for the color scheme

 

The duel on Mustafar? The decimating of the Jedi temple? The rise of Darth Vader? The hunting down of the Jedi? The birth of Luke and Leia? The destruction of the Death Star? The duel at Cloud City? The fall of Jabba the Hutt? The end of Palpatine? The redemption of Darth Vader? The reformation of the Jedi Order?

All made possible because Anakin Skywalker had his life saved at Carida by a space frog.