Thoughts (JA, Obi-Angst)

Author: Sheleigh
Disclaimer: Not mine... don't own anything besides the evil, possesed hamster that keeps me up at night, among a few nicknacks here and there! ^_^


Thoughts





Obi-Wan Kenobi glanced around, hoping no one would see him. He walked past the entrance to the Mediation Garden, and into the vast expanse of the Room of a Thousand Fountains. It seemed to the boy that he had been walking forever, when he finally found a small fountain surrounded by trees. ?Perfect,? he thought. ?No one to bother me? I can stay alone?? Obi-Wan sat on the soft green grass, and brought is knees against his chest.
Obi-Wan stared blankly at his hands, clenching them, and opening them. It had been a week since Bruck Chun?s death, and Obi-Wan hadn?t been able to think of nothing else. He could still feel the faint brush of his opponent?s finger tips against his; hear the crunch of Bruck?s head hitting the solid rock. It seemed to the young Jedi that his life was falling apart around him. ?Qui-Gon will never take me back, I hurt Bant, and though she has forgiven me? I can?t forgive myself. Oh, Force! Why does it hurt so much?? I don?t have a reason to live?? Obi-Wan started, realizing what he had just thought. The boy rested his forehead against his knees, and with a small cry, started to sob.

Qui-Gon Jinn was jerked from his meditation by something. He reached out with the Force but was unable to pinpoint what it was. Qui-Gon decided to take a walk in the gardens, feeling that the connection to the living Force may help him. And undeniably the Room of a Thousand Fountains had the best connection to the living force. Jinn walked in, and breathed a deep breathe of the fresh air. As he walked, he found his thoughts to be wandering to the young boy who, at one time, had been his Padawan learner. Qui-Gon once again became aware of his surroundings, and was surprised to find himself in the back of the gardens. He turned to leave, and head towards his own quarters, when he heard a small sound. ?Someone crying?? He turned down a small, worn path, and came to an alcove of trees. Qui-Gon stiffened in surprise. Inside sat the huddled form of Obi-Wan Kenobi.

Obi-Wan sensed someone approaching him from behind, but paid them no mind. ?Most likely here to berate me for doing something wrong? again.? He tried to stop his tears from flowing down his face, but to no avail. Silent footsteps carried whoever had found him closer, and then to a stop directly behind him. Obi-Wan reached out with the Force, and was surprised to find that it was Qui-Gon Jinn who had come.

?Obi-Wan?? Qui-Gon crouched next to the boy, and laid his hand on Obi-Wan?s shoulder. Obi-Wan jerked away from the contact. ?Obi-Wan? Please, young one, tell me what is wrong.? The boy seemed to consider this, and opened his mouth as if he was going to say something. A shudder passed through him, and he buried his head into his hands. Qui-Gon made a split second decision and sat on the ground, pulling the boy to him. He stroked Obi-Wan?s hair, murmuring senseless words of comfort under his breath. Obi-Wan stiffened again, then relaxed into the embrace.

?Obi-Wan? Will you tell me what is wrong? Please?? Qui-Gon trailed off, realizing he didn?t know exactly what to tell the distraught boy.

Obi-Wan glanced up, his blue/green eyes bright from unshed tears. ?Master... I?? Obi-Wan paused, and tried blinking back his tears. ?I thought of taking my own life today.? Abruptly stated. Qui-Gon started, horrible realization setting in.
?What?? Obi-Wan flinched, afraid of what was to come next. ?Oh, Padawan?? The younger Jedi struggled to pull himself out of the embrace, thinking only of fleeing. But Qui-Gon held on, not letting the boy leave. ?Obi-Wan, stop.? A command, aided by the tangible presence in the Force that was Qui-Gon Jinn caused the boy to halt his struggles. ?You tried to do what??

?I thought about it, Master? but then you found me. I wouldn?t have done it? really?? the boy?s statem

 

*Sniffle* That was emotional and mushy! Just the way I enjoy it!

Who doesn't love humor at the end of a story?!

Great!

KG

 

That was really sweet. I love to read mush just before i go to bed.

 

Hey, thanks for your reviews! Okay, sleep time for me... thanks again though!!

 

Vevery sad yet good.
Loved it Sheleigh!

 

AWESOME story! Hee Hee! Yoda..
That was so sweet!

 

Thanks guys!

*looks around innocently*

up! ^_~

 

WOW! That was great! I liked the Dad
part, very sweet! ^_^

UP!

 

That was sweet! I love it.

 

Hmm... Thank you Ganki and Cascadia Glad you both enjoyed it!

 

Ahhh- good mush

 

!

 

Padawan Kitara and Menilma Glad you liked it!