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Before - Legends Time of Choosing- Qui-Gon / Obi-Wan vignette

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by VaderLVR64, Jan 31, 2006.

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  1. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Feb 5, 2004
    Title: Time of Choosing
    Author: VaderLVR64
    Timeframe: JA
    Characters: Qui-Gon Jinn, Obi-Wan Kenobi
    Summary: Qui-Gon begins to feel the passing of years as his Padawan faces a time of decision.
    Notes: This is based on an Amish custom in which the young people are given permission to experience the life they have never known and after which must make a decision to return to the Amish or abandon their ways, and thus lose the fellowship of their Amish brothers and sisters. It is a little different and of course, very much an AU.
    Written for the Qui-Gon Jinn Challenge thread.

    Time of Choosing

    The group of young ones passed by him; their laughter and excited voices made him smile. The Padawans were in very high spirits, the time of Shuurviite having come upon them.

    They left the Temple in a mass, but he knew from experience that they would soon break into smaller groups and then individuals would start drifting off to explore Coruscant on his or her own. Most of them did not care to share the experiences they would have with others that they would face again as Jedi. The days Shuurviite were a private time, when one could be foolish and reckless without fear of correction or punishment.

    Obi-Wan ambled past him and winked. Then he gave his Master a look that clearly said, Don?t worry; I?ll be fine.

    It seemed odd to see Obi-Wan in the nerf leather pants and blue shirt. He was too accustomed to seeing him in the sand-colored tunics of a Jedi. Flung over the young man?s shoulder was a small bag containing two changes of clothing, sleep pants, toiletries, a map-vid card for his data pad, a comm unit, and a generous amount of credits. Qui-Gon knew exactly what was in the bag because he had given Obi-Wan advice on what to pack.

    The tall Master nodded, but after his Padawan passed a look of worry descended on his noble features. The Padawans would be on their own for the next twenty days, free to indulge any whim they might have as long as it did not violate any Galactic or Coruscant laws. And as Qui-Gon himself knew, this left a wide variety of activities that could still get them into a lot of trouble.

    Shuurviite, translated roughly from Old Basic, meant ?Time of Choosing.? That was as good an explanation as Qui-Gon could come up with, though he thought that perhaps it should have been known more correctly as the ?Time of Discovery and Choosing.? Still, the tradition was older than Master Yoda and unlikely to be renamed because of one slightly rebellious Jedi Master.

    Qui-Gon watched as the last few young ones filed out the doors. The sounds of their whooping and excited chatter were abruptly cut off when the Temple doors closed. He was left feeling strangely bereft when the Temple settled back into its customary silence.

    He felt alone and?old.

    Yes, that was it exactly; he felt old.

    The Padawans who were now spreading out among the streets of Coruscant were filled with the hope and utter certainty of youth. Their animated babbling had filled the halls for weeks now as they made their plans. Each would sample life beyond the Jedi Temple, beyond the Order, which had been the only thing they had known all of their lives.

    For each, it would be a time to choose to remain among the Jedi. They would explore the alternatives, a ?civilian? life, and then look deep within themselves to determine if being a Jedi was right for them.

    It was a rare that a Padawan left the Order after the Shuurviite rites; in fact it had not happened during his own lifetime. But as he considered how many years he had watched the young ones march out of the Temple and into ?real? life, he felt the passage of years since his own Shuurviite.

    And the number of years between that day and this one made him feel old.

    He stood there, looking out into the world that surrounded the Temple. He closed his eyes and let the sun streaming in through the windows warm his face. There were no Padawans in sight any longer, but he could hear the happy echo of their laughter.

    In a flood, the memor
  2. KELIA

    KELIA Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jul 26, 2005
    That was wonderful.

    I loved Qui-Gon's reflections and his realization at the end that he had no regrets even though he has a longing to experience life outside the Temple.


    =D= =D= =D= =D=
  3. kenobiwanobi

    kenobiwanobi Jedi Youngling star 3

    Jun 26, 2005
    Wow that really was wondeful!(as the postie above me said)

    This was a beautifully written piece that flowed falwlessly.:D Great job!=D=
  4. Layren

    Layren Jedi Master star 5

    Oct 28, 2003
    Oooh, Kim that was lovely! Poor Qui, wondering what might have been! You should have turned that into a full story!

  5. ardavenport

    ardavenport Jedi Master star 4

    Dec 16, 2004
    Nevertheless, he placed his large hand against the window and felt a sharp longing to enjoy the warmth of the sunshine that blazed just outside the Temple doors.

    Aaaaawwwwwwwwwww, that really says so much about Qui-Gon. He's Jedi thru-and-thru, but he still wonders. And of course Obi-Wan will come back! He's Obi-Wan; he'd never leave Qui-Gon let alone the Jedi. That was a wonderful idea, tying that Amish tradition with the Jedi. Something like that could have done the Order some good.


    MASTER_KAYM Jedi Youngling star 1

    Aug 3, 2004
    Nicely done =D=

    I love to know Qui-Gon's reflections. It's very well described :)
  7. Bastet

    Bastet Jedi Padawan star 4

    Dec 30, 1999
    I really liked that viggie VaderLVR64! :D

    I loved Qui-Gon's reflections, the way he was wondering of what could have been, and also how he had no worries about Obi-Wan.

    Thanks for sharing this! [face_love]
  8. DarthMousche

    DarthMousche Jedi Youngling star 3

    Jun 16, 2005
    Obi-Wan in leather pants - yum! [face_love]

    I love the conflicting feelings Qui-Gon has during this time - very parental: worried about what kind of trouble Obi-Wan can get into, while still confident that he will choose the Jedi life; feeling his age as he remembers his own Shuurviite; even asking the ol' "what if?" question.

    Putting this real life tradition in the Jedi Temple setting is a great idea. :) Thank you for sharing.
  9. jodiwent

    jodiwent Jedi Master star 4

    Feb 11, 2000
    All I can say is that was beautiful.
  10. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Master star 6

    Mar 1, 2002
    I loved this the first time I read it. It's sweet and melancholy and very satisfying. Great job with Qui-Gon getting older and remembering the past.

  11. Healer_Leona

    Healer_Leona Squirrely Community Mod star 9 Staff Member Manager

    Jul 7, 2000
    This is a joy to reread.

    And that last line Nevertheless, he placed his large hand against the window and felt a sharp longing to enjoy the warmth of the sunshine that blazed just outside the Temple doors.

    really does leave an ache in my chest as well. [face_love]
  12. LilyHobbitJedi

    LilyHobbitJedi Jedi Knight star 5

    Aug 29, 2005
    What a cute little story, I really enjoyed seeing inside Qui-Gon's mind. Interesting to use the Amish tradition with Jedi, I didn't even know that and I live fairly close to some Amish communities. Great story! =D=
  13. kateydidnt

    kateydidnt Jedi Master star 4

    Nov 11, 2004
    that was awesome. I love the idea of this tradition being a part of the Jedi. I wish you would continue and detail Obi-Wan's experience in this.
  14. Aelan_Greenleaf

    Aelan_Greenleaf Jedi Youngling star 1

    May 20, 2005
    Beautiful. I love the possibilities that this 'tradition' open up, though. I wish that it was a longer story! :) Great job!
  15. Indra

    Indra Jedi Master star 3

    Dec 31, 2003
    What a wonderful idea! It seems very likely that the Jedi would have such a ritual, giving the Padawans the choice in order to see who is really commited to the Order. Very interesting. I know this says 'vignette' at the top, but is there any chance you're going to continue this? I'd love to read more about it. :)
  16. Valairy Scot

    Valairy Scot Backpacking One Pack a Day Mod of New Films star 6 Staff Member Manager

    Sep 16, 2005
    I like the idea...almost bittersweet but without any really "bitter" in it and not quite melancholic. It could be easily called Reflections on Life (mid-age crisis?). As always, flawless story telling and flawless execution.

    Next part - Obi-Wan's experience?

    Pretty please.
  17. KILIK

    KILIK Jedi Master star 4

    May 21, 2005
    Wow! I had time to read and review one thiing before I have to go and its this and wow!:)

    I like it, this is the first time I've ever read something by you VaderLVR64.:) You did great.:D

    May I have more of this story please?:)
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