Tips for travelling in the south

Discussion in 'South East Regional Discussion' started by darthmalt16, Aug 26, 2001.

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  1. darthmalt16 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 25, 2000
    star 4
    Southern Slang

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    HEIDI - (noun) - Greeting.

    HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting.
    Usage: Heidi, Hire yew?"

    CHESTER DRAWERS.... (noun) an item used to place folded clothes
    Usage: "Mawma, where's my new tube socks?" "Dija check 'da chester drawers?"

    BARD - (verb) - Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow."
    Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck."

    JAWJUH - (noun) - The State north of Florida. Capitol is Lanner.
    Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck."

    BAMMER - (noun) - The State west of Jawjuh. Biggest city is Berminhayum.
    Usage: "A tornader jes went through Bammer an' left $20,000,000 in improvements."

    MUNTS - (noun) - A calendar division.
    Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I ain't herd from him in munts."

    THANK - (verb) - Ability to cognitively process.
    Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a burger."

    IGNERT - (adjective) - Not smart.
    Usage: "Them bammer boys sure are ignert!"

    RANCH - (noun) - A tool used for tight'nin' bolts.
    Usage: "I thank I left my ranch in the back of that pickup truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."

    ALL - (noun) - A petroleum-based lubricant.
    Usage: "I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck."

    FAR - (noun) - A conflagration.
    Usage: "If my brother from Jawjuh don't change the all in my pickup truck, that thing's gonna catch far."

    TAR - (noun) - A rubber wheel.
    Usage: "Gee, I hope that brother of mine from Jawjuh don't git a flat tar in my pickup truck."

    TIRE - (noun) - A tall monument.
    Usage: "Lord willin' and the creek don't rise, I sure do hope to see that Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."

    RETARD - (verb) - To stop working.
    Usage: "My grampaw retard at age 65."

    FAT - (noun), (verb) - a battle or combat; to engage in battle or combat.
    Usage: "You younguns keep fat'n, n' ah'm gonna whup y'uh."

    RATS - (noun) - Entitled power or privilege.
    Usage: "We Southerners are willin' to fat for are rats."

    FARN - (adjective) - Not domestic.
    Usage: "I cuddint unnerstand a wurd he sed...must be from some farn country."

    DID - (adjective) - Not alive.
    Usage: "He's did, Jim."

    EAR - (noun) - A colorless, odorless gas: Oxygen.
    Usage: "He cain't breathe...give 'im some ear!"

    BOB WAR - (noun) - A sharp, twisted cable.
    Usage: "Boy, stay away from that bob war fence."

    JEW HERE - (noun) and (verb) contraction.
    Usage: "Jew here that my brother from Jawjuh got a job with that bob war fence cump'ny?"

    HAZE - a contraction.
    Usage: "Is Bubba smart?" "Nah...haze ignert. He ain't thanked but a minnit'n 'is laf."

    SEED - (verb) - past tense of "to see".

    VIEW - contraction: (verb) and pronoun.
    Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City... view?"

    GUBMINT - (noun) - A bureaucratic institution.
    Usage: "Them gubmint boys shore is ignert.


  2. darthmalt16 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 25, 2000
    star 4
    Found some more tips.

    Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed later how to use it.
    If you forget a Southerner's name, refer to him (or her) as "Bubba." You have a 75% chance of being right.

    Just because you can drive on snow and ice does not mean we can. Stay home the two days of the year it snows.

    Do not buy food at the movie store.

    If it can't be fried in bacon grease, it ain't worth cooking, let alone eating.

    The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper.

    If attending a funeral in the South, remember, we stay until the last shovel of dirt is thrown on and the tent is torn down.

    Satellite dishes are very popular in the South. When you purchase one it is to be positioned directly in front of your trailer. This is logical bearing in mind that the dish cost considerably more than the trailer and should, therefore, be displayed.

    Florida is not considered a Southern State. There are far more Yankees than Southerners living there






    And here's something to hel you understand the language

    Southern Slang

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------



    HEIDI - (noun) - Greeting.

    HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting.
    Usage: Heidi, Hire yew?"

    CHESTER DRAWERS.... (noun) an item used to place folded clothes
    Usage: "Mawma, where's my new tube socks?" "Dija check 'da chester drawers?"

    BARD - (verb) - Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow."
    Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck."

    JAWJUH - (noun) - The State north of Florida. Capitol is Lanner.
    Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck."

    BAMMER - (noun) - The State west of Jawjuh. Biggest city is Berminhayum.
    Usage: "A tornader jes went through Bammer an' left $20,000,000 in improvements."

    MUNTS - (noun) - A calendar division.
    Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I ain't herd from him in munts."

    THANK - (verb) - Ability to cognitively process.
    Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a burger."

    IGNERT - (adjective) - Not smart.
    Usage: "Them bammer boys sure are ignert!"

    RANCH - (noun) - A tool used for tight'nin' bolts.
    Usage: "I thank I left my ranch in the back of that pickup truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."

    ALL - (noun) - A petroleum-based lubricant.
    Usage: "I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck."

    FAR - (noun) - A conflagration.
    Usage: "If my brother from Jawjuh don't change the all in my pickup truck, that thing's gonna catch far."

    TAR - (noun) - A rubber wheel.
    Usage: "Gee, I hope that brother of mine from Jawjuh don't git a flat tar in my pickup truck."

    TIRE - (noun) - A tall monument.
    Usage: "Lord willin' and the creek don't rise, I sure do hope to see that Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."

    RETARD - (verb) - To stop working.
    Usage: "My grampaw retard at age 65."

    FAT - (noun), (verb) - a battle or combat; to engage in battle or combat.
    Usage: "You younguns keep fat'n, n' ah'm gonna whup y'uh."

    RATS - (noun) - Entitled power or privilege.
    Usage: "We Southerners are willin' to fat for are rats."

    FARN - (adjective) - Not domestic.
    Usage: "I cuddint unnerstand a wurd he sed...must be from some farn country."

    DID - (adjective) - Not alive.
    Usage: "He's did, Jim."

    EAR - (noun) - A colorless, odorless gas: Oxygen.
    Usage: "He cain't breathe...give 'im some ear!"

    BOB WAR - (noun) - A sharp, twisted cable.
    Usage: "Boy, stay away from that bob war fence."

    JEW HERE - (noun) and (verb) contraction.
    Usage: "Jew here that my brother from Jawjuh got a job with that bob war fence cump'ny?"

    HAZE - a contraction.
    Usage: "Is Bubba smart?" "Nah...haze ignert. He ain't thanked but a minnit'n 'is laf."

    SEED - (verb) - past tense of "to see".

    VIEW - contraction: (verb) and pronoun.
    Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City... view?"

    GUBMINT - (noun) - A bureaucratic institution.
    Usage: "Them gubmint boys shore is ignert.


  3. darthmalt16 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 25, 2000
    star 4
    You Might Be A Yankee If ...

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------



    1. You think barbecue is a verb meaning "to cook outside."
    2. You think Heinz Ketchup is SPICY!

    3. You don't have any problems pronouncing "Worcestershire sauce" correctly.

    4. For breakfast, you would prefer potatoes au gratin to grits.

    5. You don't know what a moon pie is.

    6. You put sugar in your cornbread.

    7. You've never, ever, eaten okra.

    8. You eat fried chicken with a knife and fork.

    9. You've never seen a live chicken, and the only cows you've seen are on road trips.

    10. You have no idea what a polecat is.

    11. You don't see anything wrong with putting a sweater on a poodle.

    12. You don't have bangs.

    13. You would rather vacation at Martha's Vineyard than Six Flags.

    14. More than two generations of your family have been kicked out of the same prep school in Connecticut.

    15. You would rather have your son become a lawyer than grow up to get his own TV fishing show.

    16. Instead of referring to two or more people as "y'all," you call them "you guys," even if both of them are women.

    17. You have never planned your summer vacation around a gun-and-knife show.

    18. You think more money should go to important scientific research at your university than to pay the salary of the head football coach.

    19. You don't have at least one can of WD-40 somewhere around the house.

    20. The last time you smiled was when you prevented someone from getting on an on-ramp on the highway.

    21. You don't have any hats in your closet that advertise feed stores.

    22. The farthest south you've ever been is the perfume counter at Neiman Marcus.

    23. You call binoculars opera glasses.

    24. You can't spit out the car window without pulling over to the side of the road and stopping.

    25. You would never wear pink or an applique sweatshirt.

    26. You don't know what applique is.

    27. You don't know anyone with at least two first names (i.e., Joe Bob, Faye Ellen, Billy Ray, Mary Jo, Bubba Dean)

    28. You don't have doilies, and you certainly don't know how to make one.

    29. You've never been to a craft show.

    30. You get freaked out when people on the subway talk to you.

    31. You can't do your laundry without quarters.

    32. None of your fur coats are homemade






    Found some more tips.


    You can ask Southerners for directions, but unless you already know the positions of key hills, trees and rocks, you're better off trying to find it yourself


    Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed later how to use it.
    If you forget a Southerner's name, refer to him (or her) as "Bubba." You have a 75% chance of being right.

    Just because you can drive on snow and ice does not mean we can. Stay home the two days of the year it snows.

    Do not buy food at the movie store.

    If it can't be fried in bacon grease, it ain't worth cooking, let alone eating.

    The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper.

    If attending a funeral in the South, remember, we stay until the last shovel of dirt is thrown on and the tent is torn down.

    Satellite dishes are very popular in the South. When you purchase one it is to be positioned directly in front of your trailer. This is logical bearing in mind that the dish cost considerably more than the trailer and should, therefore, be displayed.

    Florida is not considered a Southern State. There are far more Yankees than Southerners living there






    And here's something to hel you understand the language

    Southern Slang

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------



    HEIDI - (noun) - Greeting.

    HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting.
    Usage: Heidi, Hire yew?"

    CHESTER DRAWERS.... (noun) an item used to place folded clothes
    Usage: "Mawma, where's my new tube socks?" "Dija check 'da chester drawers?"

    BARD - (verb) - Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow."
    Usage
  4. darthmalt16 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 25, 2000
    star 4
    You Might Be A Yankee If ...
    33. You have to use a knife to cut Duct Tape


    Sorry I don't know what was going on with my computer last night with that double post
  5. quigon70 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 11, 2000
    star 5
    yes the cutting duct tape with a knife bother me even more than those who have never has a moon pie and a rc

    it has mesh cloth for a reason you yankees, to rip it

    duct tape rules!
  6. tionnesharp Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 25, 2002
    star 1
    DMalt, where do you come up with this stuff? #1, my sis got CARRIED out of a ditch in East Tenn by four guys in pick-up trucks. Not my sis, her CAR got carried out of a ditch. Ha! I love living down here. It doesn't get any better, eh?
  7. darthmalt16 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 25, 2000
    star 4
    The original post and the slang dictionary were from a list. Most of the yakees I made up from watching people and a few of them I heard on the internet.

    But yeah you can't beat the pace of life down here
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