Topic of the Week Strikes Back

Discussion in 'Jacksonville, NC' started by cinemafreak, Apr 2, 2004.

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  1. cinemafreak Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 13, 2002
    star 4
    In Living Color on DVD

    One of the greatest shows ever, and easily the 3rd or 4th best sketch comedy show, next Flying Circus, Kids in the Hall, and MAdTV. If you could write an idea for a funny sketch dealing SW characters, what would it be? Maybe rewriting a movie monologue as if a SW character had said it.
  2. cinemafreak Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 13, 2002
    star 4
    FADE IN:
    SUBWAY DIET
    Jabba, looking thinner than ever, sitting:
    ANNOUNCER
    A Tattooine native businessman, Jabba the Hutt took an unusual approach to losing some of his 1,000 pounds of flab - he decided to go out for a sandwich! In fact, he visited a Subway restaurant twice daily for an entire year, dropping an amazing 850 pounds in the process. Jabba is now an inspiration to dieters galaxy-wide.

    What Jabba calls his "Subway Diet" helped him trim his waist by 90%:
    Jabba in the background speaking "Huttese"
    DROID
    The Greatly Reduced Jabba says: "Most people think of fast food as a way to gain weight, not lose it!"

    ANNOUNCER
    He got the idea when one of his minions saw a sign in his local Subway shop on Tattooine promoting the "Seven Under 6 Grams of Fat" line of sandwiches. It was a far cry from the diet of fat-laden, mubasa hok, jimunee ronto pagona, and hotsa chuba that Jabba was used to. After the minion told Jabba, he ate him. But after getting heartburn following his feast, Jabba realized that his underling might have been right. Many other folks are jumping on the repulsor wagon and joining up with Jabba. All of his Gammorean guards are now on the system and have seen a drop in as much as 2000 pounds collectively. Even his new pet Rancor is on it. Jabba only allows it to eat the leanest, low-fat creatures. Any overweight victims are merely imprisoned.

    You know, it's always nice to hear about these diet plans actually working. I tried the Naboo-Slim shakes once. But they never mixed with the blue milk right and tasted gritty. But kudos to you Jabba. Good luck
    FADE OUT:
  3. jkg_vader Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 31, 2003
    star 4
    How about a retelling of Romeo and Juliet with Luke and Leia.....
  4. cinemafreak Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 13, 2002
    star 4
    only if there are Spinger's Final Thoughts afterwards.

    Come on folks, you don't have to write the script, just toss out your ideas. Anybody can post.
  5. THE_casual_fan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 13, 2004
    star 1


    How about Vader doing a hair removal infomercial? He could probably burn off hair with a light saber... brings new meaning to "nicks and cuts." Some serious razor burn too.

    Or CP3O doing a cooking show?
  6. jkg_vader Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 31, 2003
    star 4
    Queer Eye for the Straight Guy featuring C-3PO & R2-D2
  7. cinemafreak Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 13, 2002
    star 4
    hahahaha. good stuff.
  8. benskywalker1 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 12, 2004
    LOL That's just wrong.
  9. Minacia_Brightstar Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    May 23, 2001
    star 5
    Well, since Jabba is on a Subway health kick, perhaps he can go one step further and join the juicing craze. He can market his own line of "Jabba Juicers." :p
  10. Dal--Intrepid Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 13, 2002
    star 5
    Darth Vader launches his search for "The Apprentice."

    A group of young recruits at the Imperial Academy coming from various backgrounds and upbringings get their shot at running a fleet. Each week they must undertake tasks ranging from planetary bombardments to interrogations until only one remains . . . and when I say remains, I means remains.

    At the end of each episode, Vader quips his now famous and trademarked line, "You have failed me for the last time!" Then he proceeds to Force-choke out the loser.

    (Hmmm . . . suddenly I have an urging to knock out a little script on this and put my cameras to work. I've been wanting to put together a little film short parody of some kind.)
  11. THE_casual_fan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 13, 2004
    star 1
    OH MY GOSH!!! The idea for Darth Vader launching his search for "The Apprentice" is hilarious!

    I think critics would have to agree that even Vader's helmet is more attractive than Donald Trump's hair.
  12. cinemafreak Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 13, 2002
    star 4
    dal - wow. I gotta adapt that one for the show
  13. jkg_vader Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 31, 2003
    star 4
  14. Entropy Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2002
    star 4
    How about Iron Sith? A compitition between Sith Lords, where the competitors have 2 days to come up with new and cruel ways to destroy defenseless planets. A panel of celebrity judges votes to decide the winner.
  15. jkg_vader Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 31, 2003
    star 4
    hehehehehehehehe.

    good one!

    How about The Bachelor, featuring Luke, and all the women will be all his previous girlfriends...
  16. cinemafreak Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 13, 2002
    star 4
    and the followup appearance on Springer to deal with his sister
  17. TallonKaardgamer Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 9, 2002
    star 4
    Here's the question I was faced with when competing in the extemporaneous comedy skit for Mr. Star Wars back at Dragoncon last year.
    *****************************

    You are Jabba the Hutt. The cupboard is bear, you are hungry to the point of starving. Explain to Bib Fortuna and Salacious Crumb that you are totally out of tasty "Chewie Wookie Cookies." Go.
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