Trembling in the Balance (Obi/Qui-Angst/Drama) COMPLETE 7/28/02

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Cascadia, Jul 26, 2002.

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  1. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    This was my first attempt at fan-fiction that I wrote a few months ago, in February. Besides that, I had not written any fiction for years, and never finished any of the ones that I had started. But I hope my writing has gotten a little better since then. I assume there are many people who never visit FFN, where I usually post, so I thought I would post this here. :)

    There are two sequels. This one is only three parts, and the middle one (Hiding Master Sariel ) is only one part, but the last one ( Passage of Fear ) is longer. And all of these are finished, and can be found at FFN. So... here was my first fan-fic. :)


    TITLE: TREMBLING IN THE BALANCE
    AUTHOR: Cascadia
    TIME: 7 years pre-TPM, Obi-Wan is 18
    RATING: PG-13
    CATEGORY: Angst/Drama
    SUMMARY: Obi-Wan has a serious problem he tries to keep from Qui-Gon. But how hard will that be while on a mission?
    ARCHIVE: Please ask first.
    DISCLAIMER: All recognizable characters are the property of Lucasfilm Limited. All the rest belong to me. I receive no profit from this.
    AUTHOR'S NOTES: Anything in italics are personal thoughts. Anything between / / are Qui-Gon and Obi-wan talking through their bond.
    ********************
  2. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    TREMBLING IN THE BALANCE



    CHAPTER 1 - TREMBLINGS


    The rising sunlight streamed uncompromisingly through the windowpane. It seemed to push away the lingering darkness with a force. Uncompromising - taking without asking - growing with a monster fierceness - relentless. But it did not take what was not originally offered. The window blinds were raised to let everything in, so there was not really any crime - not any infringement of rights.

    Obi-Wan tried to go back to sleep, but it was useless. He never could when he awoke like this. The early morning insomnia had become a habit recently. He was pretty sure why, but that didn't matter. It wasn't important anyway, was it?

    Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn palmed the door lock to their living quarters and stepped through, dropping a data reader on the console table beside the door. "Obi-Wan?" he called. "Obi-Wan? Are you up, padawan?"

    After all, it was the early morning hours, and his apprentice Obi-Wan was not the type to be up early if he had a choice.

    No answer.

    Qui-Gon walked to Obi-Wan's bedroom door and peered in. The young Jedi had his back towards the door and was closing a desk drawer that his body nearly concealed from Qui-Gon's view.

    "Obi-Wan?"

    The padawan, still clad in his sleep pants, turned around slowly, leaning against the drawer he had just closed. "Yes, Master?" His hair was disheveled from sleep, and his face pallid.

    "Are you sick, Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon asked, concerned at his padawan's appearance and the fact that he was up at this very uncharacteristic hour.

    Obi-Wan hesitated, glancing to the floor at his feet, then back to Qui-Gon in the doorway. "No, Master. Why? Where have you been?"

    "I was summoned by the Council."

    "So early, Master?" Obi-Wan asked.

    "Yes, padawan. We have an assignment. Start packing," Qui-Gon said as he turned away.

    Obi-Wan followed him out, brows furrowed. "An assignment?"

    Qui-Gon stopped abruptly and turned around. Obi-Wan, who was right on his heels, almost ran into him and had to stop abruptly - taking a couple steps back so he could see the tall Jedi master without craning his neck uncomfortably. Qui-Gon couldn't help but smile.

    He put his hand lightly on the young Jedi's shoulder. "Yes, Obi-Wan. An assignment. Now are you going to pack or do I have to do it for you?" his eyes sparkled.

    "But-"

    "No 'buts', padawan," Qui-Gon interjected. "The healers have already cleared you. Your leg is well now, and Healer J'Reedon said there is no reason why you cannot return to full-time duty." Qui-Gon paused, gently squeezing the young man's shoulder. "I would think you would be more than ready to leave the temple after being stuck here for two months."

    Obi-Wan's gaze dropped to the floor, his brow still furrowed. "When do we leave," he asked, knowing there was no way to get out of it.

    "The shuttle's ready, so we will leave as soon as you are packed.... 'Now' would be more precise," Qui-Gon added with a glimmer in his eye.

    "Now? We're leaving now?" Obi-Wan took an unconscious step backwards, pulling his shoulder free of his master's grip. His eyes were wide, almost pleading. "How long will we be gone?"

    "Are you going to question everything I tell you? We will be gone as long as we need to be. Now," Qui-Gon walked into Obi-Wan's bedroom and retrieved the young Jedi's travel bag, "you need to pack." He started packing his padawan's things while Obi-Wan watched from the doorway.

    "What are you doing, Master?... I can do it myself," he whined.

    Qui-Gon turned to him, and stopped packing. "Very well. But we need to leave as soon as possible. Do you need to clean up first?" he questioned in his forever calm manner, already knowing the answer.

    "Yes, Master," he whispered, sounding lost. He raised his eyes back to Qui-Gon, almost pleading. "We can't leave tomorrow?"

    "No, Obi-Wan." Qui-Gon turned and quickly walked out.

    Obi-Wan went into the 'fresher, leaning heavily against the door after it closed behind him. What was he going to do now? Would he have
  3. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Uh, maybe everybody here's already read this? Or maybe it's that bad. I haven't read it for awhile, so maybe it is.
  4. Rogue_JediKnight Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 2002
    star 3
    Cascadia - Wow, awesome job for having been your first fanfic :D.
    Sounds like Obi-Wan has fallen victim to a nasty habit :(

    Can't wait for the next part.

    Rogue
  5. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Thank you, Rogue_JediKnight . :)

    Yes, Obi's definitely got a problem.

    Thanks so much for reading!



  6. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Well, Rogue_JediKnight . I'll give you the last two parts together. Thanks so much for reading. I may not post the 2 sequels here, but you can find them at fanfiction.net, if you want to read them. Just search for my penname 'Cascadia'. Leave a review if you do, please. It makes writing so much more enjoyable when you know someone's reading. Anyway, here's the last two parts for you. :)


    CHAPTER 2 - TAINTED


    The smell of the gardens assailed Obi-Wan before he reached them. He did not remember the fragrances to be this strong earlier. Perhaps it was a nocturnal event that produced such a potent reaction from the flora. It was a sweet heaven to smell - but in his current distress even that did not impress him.

    He slipped past the arbor gates, his eyes combing the floralscape for any sign of the pale blue flowers. There... the flowers' petals were nearly closed up now in the darkening night. He ran over to them and fell on his knees, crushing the delicate stems beneath him. His hands skimmed the earth, searching, searching frantically for that precious bottle.

    Where is it? It has to be right here.

    Then his fingers touched something small and compact. It was the missing bottle. He grabbed it, quickly unscrewing the top and pouring its contents into his opened palm. Capsules spilled onto the ground around him, only frustrating him more. Swallowing one from his palm, Obi-Wan searched the ground for the fallen ones, picking them up and placing them back in the bottle.

    When he finally gave up searching for more, he sat down, sprawled across the bed of flowers, and allowed himself to breathe. He felt better already. Then he took two more capsules and swallowed them, as well. Three had become his normal dosage since the shuttle ride to this planet.

    It's over. I found enough to make it back to Coruscant, he thought, relieved.

    "I'll never let you out of my sight again, little one," he whispered to the bottle.

    After carefully placing the bottle in his pocket, Obi-Wan walked back through the garden, strolling along, quietly enjoying the night view of the city filling the horizon. A few hours later he returned to his guestroom within the palace.

    When he entered his room, he heard a strange yapping sound coming from Qui-Gon's adjoining quarters. He went in the 'fresher to the door that led to his master's room and listened intently. Sure enough, the animalistic yapping was coming from Qui-Gon's room. He tightened his mental shields.

    "Master?"

    The door flew open, revealing the Jedi master with a smile on his face. "Come in, Obi-Wan. I have something to show you." Qui-Gon backed away from the door, allowing the younger man to enter.

    Obi-Wan went in and scanned the room, his eyes coming to rest on a small, furry creature seated contentedly in the middle of the large bed. It had light brown colored fluffy hair, dark eyes, and was absolutely cute. It yapped again, as if in response to Obi-Wan's gawking.

    "Well, Obi-Wan? What do you think?" Qui-Gon asked. The padawan was frozen in shock. "Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon laughed.

    Obi-Wan turned to his master, a confused look on his face. "Wh... what is it, Master?"

    "It is a drangmul pup, padawan. A carnivorous, Cardani domesticated pet." He pulled Obi-Wan towards the bed where the little creature still sat patiently. "It won't hurt you, Obi-Wan. It is perfectly harmless. See for yourself."

    The drangmul raised its front legs in a trained posture and yapped again. The young man tentatively offered his hand to it and was rewarded with a thorough hand-licking.

    "Where did it come from, Master?" Obi-Wan asked, now interested.

    "It came from Ambassador Corrunem. He has a kennel of them and thought that it might make you feel better to have a new friend," Qui-Gon smiled. "And I have already thanked him for you."

    "He gave it to me?" he said, surprised.

    "Yes, padawan. It, or shall I say 'she'... is yours."

    Obi-Wan continued to stare at the small creature, unable to comprehend. "But... as Jedi we aren't sup
  7. PadawanKitara Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 31, 2001
    star 5
    Yes Cascadia I remember this one. It's really good :)
  8. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Thanks, PadawanKitara . :)

  9. CYNICAL21 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 8, 2001
    star 4
    I had forgotten how much I enjoyed it the first time around. You have a lovely gift for descriptions, CAS - very vivid and bright and, somehow, REAL.

    Good job.

    CYN
  10. shanobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 11, 2001
    star 4
    Glad to see you decided to post this here, Cas :)

    Love your Obi/Qui interactions and as usual, the descriptions were right on.

    I would post the others here too :)
  11. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Thank you, CYN and shan . :)

  12. Rogue_JediKnight Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 2002
    star 3
    Cascadia - Sorry I didn't get a chance to post sooner :( - my on-line time over the last couple of days has been erratic, at best :).

    You did an outstanding job handling such an often taboo subject :D. A glaring reminder that sometimes even Jedi are subject to the same failings as the rest of us ;).

    I will try (please, no Yoda lecture here :p) to check out your other work, but I hope you will continue to post your stories here :).

    Rogue
  13. obi_ew Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 14, 2002
    star 5
    I read all your stories over at the other place but it was really nice to get a chance to re-read this.I think you should post the rest of the story here so those who don't visit the other site can enjoy them also! :D
  14. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Thank you, Rogue_JediKnight and Obi_ew . :)

    I suppose I could post the other two here. Don't know if anybody else will read them or not, though. :( But I'll post the middle sequel, Hiding Master Sariel , now in a new thread, since you don't necessarily have to have read this one to enjoy it.
  15. shanobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 11, 2001
    star 4
    Please do post it, Cas. Believe it or not, I haven't read that one :)

    I think that is the only one of yours I haven't read.

    I don't know how you feel about it, but maybe you could start out by posting shorter pieces and updating more often. It may pull in some more readers :)

    I'll be looking for it anyways :D
  16. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Thanks, shan . But Hiding Master Sariel is only one part and very short at that. I think it should be only one part, but I'll definitely try that with Passage of Fear . Thanks for suggesting that. :)

  17. Wild_Huntress Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 15, 2002
    star 4
    Hey cool story.
    I wonder, sometimes- what else will people put Obi through? (Did that make sense?)
  18. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Yes, Wild_Huntress , it did! :)

    I love putting Obi through a lot, I admit. I'm just a sucker for Obi-in-distress stories. :D
  19. Rogue_JediKnight Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 2002
    star 3
    Shanobi - maybe you could start out by posting shorter pieces and updating more often.
    Excellent suggestions - as long as they aren't too short, oh yeah and no cliffhangers and just kidding :p

    And don't forget to submit your story information to the new story thread

    Looking forward to the next story :D

    Rogue
  20. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Thanks, Rogue_JediKnight . :) And the next story, Hiding Master Sariel , is up now.
  21. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    up! :D

    Maybe one day when I have more time and more patience, I'll go back and rewrite my early stories.
  22. sheleigh Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 31, 2002
    star 4
    Aww, Cas this one is excellent how it is! I read it at the "other site" and it was a pleasure to read the second time around. :)

    Again, excellent, and I hope that you post more of your stories here.

    And for good meaure, UP! 8-}
  23. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Thanks, sheleigh !

    I'll start posting Passage of Fear tomorrow! Thanks for reading! :)
  24. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
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