Saga Turn Your Face to the Sun (DDC 2015: Obi-Wan) COMPLETE, and please vote for your fave DD2015 fic!

Great updates! This made me laugh:

Somehow, I expected nothing less from little Leia!

 

Great revealing entry. love his conversation with Bail and his now focussing on the present

 

Great updates! It's so interesting how Ben now has three children on his mind. He had thought that living on Tattooine would be an isolated, lonely existence but the problems come to him!

Loved how one of Leia's temper tantrums caused a power outage in the palace. I think every child has that dormant ability. Those temper tantrums can be unbelievable.

 

And caught up on entries 19-20 of this story too (it's JL catch-up day for me).

I loved how you built the parallels and the differences between Luke, Leia and Mara in the past few chapters. All three begin to manifest Force powers and need to learn how to control them, but for Mara it's already a source of pain and loneliness ("Would the Emperor gather them around him, to seed them with the dark side?" -- well...), Luke is already using it to help others, and Leia is using it to get her way ("she once managed to mind-trick her nanny into giving her extra cake" ) although her education as a princess will end up setting it aside for her in favour of more mundane powers of persuasion. A sad irony also in the fact that Obi-Wan isn't so confident about Leia's tutors managing to teach her control, and yet she will manage to remain undetected longer than the other two.

And this:

... was so sweet I wonder if Luke is having similar dreams.

I also loved Obi-Wan's musings about Anakin and his decision not to tell Luke the truth about him -- the way you wrote it is a perfect insert in the movies.

 

Your characterization of Obi-Wan pleases me immensely. I wish you would have written the scripts for Episode 1, 2 & 3. He reflects his own flaws & failures. Shows concern for Leia. Thank you!

 

This is a brilliant thread & I love your talent as a fanfic writer. But I am leaving the boards & I am sorry not to be able to comment any more. This way I just want to say good-bye! And I am not sure if I ever come back! After I received an important PM today, I understood that it is better to leave all behind. Even fanfic!

 

I love the idea of Luke and Leia dreaming of each other, and having that innate connection even if they are growing up so far apart. And Ben has so many burdens, and although he knows keeping the secret from Luke is selfish, he still believes it is the right decision.

I love that thing! We all have childhood toys that mean so much to us, and given Luke's actual Skyhopper was smashed at the time of ANH it makes sense that he'd fall back on that model which held so much promise.

Exactly - Owen may not like Ben, but he is practical and realises that Luke's Force sensitivity is something that cannot be ignored. Leia has it a bit easier - Bail was a friend of the Jedi and her princess training gives her drive and focus that opportunities that Luke doesn't have. However, she is in far more immediate danger and it must be just harrowing for Breha and Bail every day.

Very true! A lot of what is driving Obi-Wan is his old guilt - it is far easier for him to pretend that his friend Anakin, who he loved and still loves, was killed by Darth Vader rather than admitting the truth. He thinks if he tells himself the story enough it will be true and believable when he eventually tells Luke (not realising how much trouble it will cause!) Keeping the lightsaber around hurts him deeply, but there's more than a little self-flagellation there. He knows taking the lightsaber and leaving Anakin alive on that black beach was because he wasn't strong enough to finish him, and lives with the consequences of that decision every day.

Thank you! I imagine little Leia was quite the terror

Thank you! I see Obi-Wan and Bail as great friends.

True! And Ben never thought he'd have a group of little non-padawans to worry about, but life is surprising sometimes.

Yes, in hindsight, Leia seemed to be the best equipped of the three to deal with her manifesting Force abilities, strangely enough! Although they're all still very young, their powers are already being shaped by who they are and will become - whether that's innate or environmental is another question...

Of course! I like the idea that in sleep and dreams the children really open themselves up to the Force, and connect with each other across the vast stars. For Luke, however, its something special that he keeps to himself.

Thank you! I love Alec Guinness' acting in that scene - you can tell he's holding something back, even though Guinness didn't know that at the time! The instincts of a good actor, I suppose.

Thank you! I really love Obi-Wan, although he is terribly flawed he is reflective. And I hope you're not leaving for good, it would be sad to see you go!

 

Tags: Findswoman K'Tai qel Letta-Tanku @serendipityaey


Entry 21

Dear Qui-Gon,

I have begun my lessons with young Luke – he is eager for my company – or perhaps simply eager for any company at all. His only friend is the Darklighter boy who he seems infrequently, and though he is much loved by his guardians he craves variety in his humdrum life. But he adores Beru, happy to help her with chores beyond any five year old I have ever encountered – although I admit I have not been exposed to a wide range. The Jedi Padawans I remember were never very keen on chores.

Those younglings learnt discipline and order as soon as they arrived at the Temple, but Luke’s focus is difficult to hone. He resembles his father in that respect, although Anakin was several years older when he came under my charge with hard work already drilled into him by his years as a slave. I try not the pressure the boy too much at this point – he will know the harshness of life soon enough. As soon as he is old enough he will need to start helping Owen run the farm, which can be exhausting physical as well as mental work.

When I do finally get him to focus, Luke is desperate to master the task as soon as possible. The exercise I had him to clear his mind is but one example:

“Imagine the desert,” I instructed, thinking it would be easier for him to visualize. “Barren and lifeless – completely empty. Imagine your mind is the desert.”

“Okay,” Luke answered, scrunching up his face as he closed his eyes.

“Don’t try so hard,” I advised, lightly touching his shoulder. “It is counterproductive.”
Luke opened his eyes and blinked at me, confused.

“The opposite of what I want,” I explained. “The point is to let go of all your thoughts until your mind is as clear and empty as the desert.”

“Okay.” Luke closed his eyes again and took a deep breath. I let several minutes pass before I asked him if his mind was clear.

“No,” he told me unhappily.

“Did you picture the desert as I asked?”

“Yes.” Luke wrung his little hands, looking frustrated.

“So where did your thoughts go then?”

“Well I saw the desert,” Luke explained, dragging out the last syllable. “But it wasn’t empty at all like you said. I saw the suns that go up and down every day, and the sand that blows everywhere making new dunes, and the crawlers and bantha herds and sometimes Sandpeople calling to each other and sarlaccs under the ground waiting to snatch someone up and…”

“Alright, Luke,” I squeezed his shoulder. “I understand.”

“Did I do it wrong?” Luke’s eyes filled with tears.

I thought about what you would have said to the boy, Qui-Gon. If it had been Anakin I would have told him yes, that he had completely missed the point of the exercise. But I am older now, and I hope wiser. I look at this barren planet and see nothing but wastes – Luke sees life and possibility.

“No, you didn’t do it wrong,” I told him. “You showed me how I was wrong – of course the desert is full of life. It shows lateral thinking.”

“What?”

“It’s a good thing,” I assured him. “But let’s try the exercise again, but this time, imagine you’re in a dark room, with no light, no sound, nothing.”

“Why am I in the room?” Luke asked, his eyes wide. “Did I do something bad?”

It is a struggle, Qui-Gon., let me tell you.


Ben Kenobi


Entry 22

Dear Qui-Gon,

I have grave news. The day seemed to start poorly; I had a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach, anticipation and dread all rolled into one. The sunrise was deep red, and although I was never one of those Jedi who looked for meaning in my environment, all the same it boded ill. A storm was coming, the kind that rained dust and ash and left none alive that were unlucky enough to be caught in it.

Still, I saddled Rooh and made my way to the Lars’ farm, knowing that if a storm did approach it would be safer there or in town. In any event, it was a good opportunity to continue with Luke’s training instruction. I must remind myself that I am teaching him the basics only – focus, control and concealment. Beru keeps a watchful eye, although she is often distracted by daily chores which I flatter myself I assist with in some capacity.

I make a game of it with Luke – we both fold coarse sheets while I speak to him, telling jokes and singing songs and making up stories. It is his job to focus on his task and not telegraph his reactions through the Force. As you can imagine, Qui-Gon, the boy is poor at this, and excels at the opposite. When I ask him to project a feeling – to try and make me share whatever emotion he has it is potent and powerful. From even this rudimentary instruction I can see where his skills are – persuasion, healing, and intuition. It is a shame I cannot help him develop these abilities, and must restrict myself to dampening the light which burns so brightly inside him.

But today Luke was unsettled, although he was reluctant to tell me why. A dream, I eventually got out of him – a crying child that was not himself, heavy breathing in the darkness, a flash of red light. He was afraid, Luke told me, even now that he had awoken and knew he was safe. He still felt cold.

I despaired, thinking that his fraternal bond with his twin on Alderaan was the cause. Had Vader discovered her identity? I bid farewell to Beru as she wrapped Luke in a blanket and cradled him to her chest, giving him a mother’s comfort I could never replicate. Then I headed straight for Anchorhead to see what I could find out. Tosche Station had access to the holonet, the small bar projecting the latest news from the Empire and Hutt Space, although few gave it attention.

I quelled my urgency and ordered a drink, glancing at the holonet absently as if I was disinterested. I knew if Leia had been exposed and Bail and Breha punished the Emperor would not have been able to resist broadcasting their treachery to the galaxy. Alderaan was still the pinnacle of Core society, and though they gave Palpatine lip service everyone knew their true allegiances.

However the report on the holonet was entirely unexpected. News travels slowly out here in the ‘Rim, but evidently there had been an uprising on Mandolore, and I knew at once the source of both my and Luke’s discomfort.

Bo-Katan and her Death Watch had indeed risen against the Empire, destroying several wings of the Imperial Academy before a grass roots rebellion had seen them commandeer the Palace. I remember Bo-Katan saying as much, although I had hoped with the passage of time she had come to see the foolishness of such an act. No rebellion can take root against the Empire on a single planet – it must be a collective, and only with strength in numbers across many worlds will it succeed.

The news report was brief, proclaiming victory for the Empire in stamping out the uprising. Death Watch had held the Palace for only three days before the Imperial fleet arrived and decimated them. There were no survivors.

I had to turn away when footage of the Emperor’s speech began to play, unable and unwilling to hear his cruel, victorious words. He denounced Death Watch as terrorists swiftly dealt with rather than patriots fighting to reclaim their homeland of course, and he is so persuasive and cunning I fear for Bail Organa’s roots of rebellion. The Emperor is still popular, and the people still blind.

But my sorrows are with poor Bo-Katan, with her child Mara who will now never know the peace I promised her. Luke must have dreamed her death, his mind so open that his father’s dark deeds are manifesting themselves in his sleep. I must make stopping this a priority, lest Luke’s mind reaches back to Vader’s and he senses the boy’s presence here.

I had such hopes for young Mara – I had nurtured wild dreams that one day Bo-Katan would find me and ask for Mara to be trained. What good I could have done with Luke and Mara, and perhaps one day Leia, teaching them to grow strong in the Force! There had been a strange whisper in the back of my mind when I met her, as if she was to play a part in the life of my young charge. But it must have been only a reflection, a path in life now blocked.

I hope she is one with the Force now, Qui-Gon, the poor child who deserved so much more. Perhaps, if it is even possible, you can watch over her for me.

Ben Kenobi

 

Awwwww. I can just imagine and believe that LUke would see life in what others would see as barren landscapes. Luke dreamt of Mara's capture! But the upside of that is they're deeply connected at such a visceral level!

 

Hehehehe. Little Luke and all his questions. What a typical 5 year old.

And poor Mara. While we know she isn't one with the Force, her childhood will be dark..

Great update.

 

Precious reading time today and I must share how much I'm enjoying your story. The timeskip was so well handled and the inclusion of Mara and Bo-Katan, well, that was fantastic! This story includes even mentions of Miller's Kenobi characters; t's the story I've been looking for as it interpolates TCW, the novels, and films. The description of meditations, the Force, and the ways it connects Force Sensitives all ring true. Way to go, JL! It will be hard to see 2015 end with this fic's conclusion, yet how fulfilling that day will be, too.

 

Beautiful! Just what I needed to read tonight.

 

Love those lessons and terrible news. But we know

 

So interesting that it is Luke and not Ben who senses Mara's distress, as if Luke can reach into his own future attachment. Of course Ben would assume that Mara died, and how hard that must be on him. Obi-Wan abhored waste, and to snuff out so bright a light as Mara would have been an outrageous, wanton waste of a brilliant future.
Loved how Luke saw all the light and life in the desert, and not the barren plain that Obi-Wan saw. Of course, coming from the bustling Coruscant, Ben would interpret Tattooine as dull and boring, but to Luke, who has always lived here, the desert is vibrant and pulsing with life. Nice touch there, JL!

 

Okay, catching up on reviews here...

Entry 21

Great way of turning the lessons on their head, with Obi-Wan ending up learning more from Luke than Luke learns from Obi-Wan But it was also a great way to highlight everything that Obi-Wan may have done wrong in training Anakin, and the shortcomings of the Old Republic Jedi dogma. Obi-Wan is still learning to see the world as it is, not as he was taught it was.

Entry 22

Such a wonderful description of Luke

Mara's abduction and the foreshadowing that comes with it... What can I say. Amazing idea. I love how you entwined all the threads of the Legendsverse together here.

 

This is going to be one of the hardest catch-ups ever. My brain was telling me that I did respond after March, but as my dad said, to think and to poop are not two same things. So...I may drift the thread and I apologise. I may also be editing this first set of replies until you've posted what I assume is the last chapter of the DDC.


March 19th (this entry)

The contrast between the skin weathering and the time passing by so slowly is spot-on. The relativity of aging is all there and I love the parallel with the two suns, though it's slighty abstract. The biological process appears to be slower, though; as Obi-Wan probably has the wisdom of a 120-year-old after everything he has gone through recently.

The moment with him seeing Padmé in Luke almost made me cry, when I think that she died with an expression of agony on her face, yet he remembers her as his friend who was smiling.

Another thing I like here is the mistakes Obi-Wan admits so freely to Beru, out of all people. Is she, perhaps, too simple and therefore more likely to challenge him? Or the exact opposite? He is being too hard on himself, but once again, with how everything went down, it makes sense.

This is also the first time I had the thought about Bail and Breha not having a Force-sensitive protector while raising Leia. Yikes!

~~~

March 31st (this entry)

The loss of hope with Shaak Ti's death, as opposed to seeing hope in little Luke is as disturbing as it is wonderful. And a proof that hope never dies. Also, Luke is the light after all and the lights are a great match to hope - they never go out. Light of hope. Light IS the hope.

And bless Owen for being...Owen. Hope he actually manages to understand the necessity of Obi-Wan's presence, though from how Luke speaks of Obi-Wan to C-3PO before meeting him, I doubt that.

~~~

April 20th (this entry)

Ooo, nice little reference to the Clone Wars film here! I'm glad I am responding late, because I only saw that last Saturday. And I did think that Ahsoka acting slightly off on Tatooine may not necessarily be her fault, as she could not know every detail of her new master's childhood; but at the same time, it was a clear warning sign about Anakin. I'm almost giddy to see how you caught this here!

~~~

April 29th (this entry)

I want to hug Obi-Wan now. Insecurity and hopelessness are OK, even for a Jedi. He has all the right reasons to occasionally feel that way. I absolutely disagree with the coward comment right below the entry. We are not made of stone.

And Rooh's empathy here was wonderful.

Other than that, I subscribe to all Findswoman said.

~~~

May 21st (this entry)

I feel awkward writing about Beru while everybody else is gushing about baby Luke, but babies are always cute and happy, while...the situation this poor, poor woman is in.

From everything you have shown us so far, her marriage with Owen does not strike me as a happy. Sure, he works a lot and may be feeling threatened by the current events; but she appears to be nothing more than a sad servant at this point. In the scene where she washes clothes, she strikes me as somebody who was taught that she should be pleasing men this way, regardless of her connection to them, and that...that breaks my heart. On the other hand, it's Tatooine, the planet where Hutt criminals walk around with scantily-clad slaves, so perhaps I should not be surprised, at all.

~~~

May 28th (this entry)

At first, I was about to say "wait, the Mustafar battle could not have happened the same day as the Jedi massacre, it takes a while to get to the edge of the Galaxy!"...then I saw the paragraph about Luke's birthday being "soon" and I slapped myself on the head. You thought of everything!

Not sure what to think of Owen at this point. At the same time, everything else makes sense.

Once again, I agree with Findswoman regarding love and attachment. Nothing to add there, she said it before me.

~~~

June 15th (this entry)

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK.

Everything, from Owen still being strange, to rancor-hide being sexist to Beru before eventually figuring out that Obi-Wan is not cousin Ben...EEEEK.

~~~

June 30th (this entry)

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK again. Love it how Jabba accented the word negotiation, though. Now, let's see how Obi-Wan will escape this, especially with the Hutt bringing up so many wounds that had not healed yet.

And yes, I did expect the Rotta thing to be brought up!

 

Thank you! I could see Luke having not only a deep connection to Leia, but also to Mara even if he doesn't know it.

I love writing little Luke! And yes, poor Mara, she has a hard road ahead of her.

Thank you! I've really loved incorporating aspects of the Clone Wars and Kenobi and dealing with the first few years of Obi-Wan's exile. I do hope to continue in 2016 to cover the rest of his time on Tattoine.

Thanks gal!

He does indeed! Luke has such a unique perspective, coming at everything from a point of innocence and clarity that's so different for Obi-Wan. At the Temple I imagine the younglings had to become very mature from a very young age before they could really form their own identities, which I think was part of the problem. Luke is learning to think for himself.

Yes, the Bo-Katan backstory is one which has been worked out in my own personal headcanon for a while, and may be expanded upon in other fics

I do love a bit of dramatic irony!

It will all work out in the end!

Thank you! Luke sees things from such a different perspective to Obi-Wan, and while he may come to dislike his home planet over the years at this stage its all he known, and he sees its secrets. Obi-Wan would feel such guilt over Mara and not being in a position to help her - but the Force works in mysterious ways!

Exactly - Obi-Wan is starting to see the flaws that may have contributed to the Order's downfall and trying to course correct - he is learning to form his own opinions and ideas as much as Luke is, and question everything he once accepted.

Thank you! As I said above, Mara's backstory may show up in other fics eventually - its become my firm headcanon now!

Thank you for the detailed responses!

In hindsight it seems odd that Bail and Breha weren't given more support with Leia given her Force abilities, but I can see why they would want to raise her as they would have any other daughter. Obi-Wan, however, has only his life as a Jedi to fall back on. But he appreciates Beru very much, and knows that he's not going to get very far by lying to her - so the truth wins her over, and well, she has few other options knowing nothing of the Force or how to teach Luke to control his powers.

There is a mutual dislike between Obi-Wan and Owen - there could not possibly be two more different people but they share a love for Luke and a desire to protect him, so there is a necessity in that common ground.

And we will certainly get to why Luke has the opinion of Obi-Wan that he does in ANH

Although hit and miss, I really enjoyed much of the Clone Wars - the film actually provides some interesting background to the Hutts and Tatooine, although I always found it strange that the moral implications of doing a deal with the Hutts wasn't greatly explored.

I thought it would be very easy for Obi-Wan to fall into a deep depression during this time, given all that has happened, how much he blames himself and how little he can do at this time. But even in his private thoughts, he tries to keep a stiff upper lip.

An interesting interpretation! In my mind at least Beru and Owen have a very happy marriage - their life is a struggle and they both work had to survive, but they are hardy desert people who have never known anything else and on some level appreciate the simplicity of life on the farm. I imagine that if they were offered a chance to move offworld Owen would stubbornly refuse and Beru would say she'd like a brief visit but wouldn't like to stay away too long.

I don't see Beru as a mere servant at all - she looks after the home and Luke while Owen toils to keep the farm running - they are traditional gender roles, true (although that term has less meaning in GFFA than it does here in Earth), but that doesn't necessarily make them bad.

Ultimately, Beru is kind, and it is that kindness that moves her to clean up for Obi-Wan when she sees he is deep in a depressive spiral. He needed help, and she was more than willing to provide it not because she sees it as her duty, but because Obi-Wan is a friend and she does not want to see that friend in pain.

Yes, I had to think about the timeline a little bit! I never really thought it made much sense in ROTS.

Thank you! I hope that made everything make sense in retrospect!

Rotta is such good material! I like the idea of Anakin once saving Jabba's son, and now Jabba making a deal which will protect Anakin's. I do admit that this idea was based on an alternate explanation for Jabba's dismissal of Luke in ROTJ - what if he had good reason to think Luke's claims of being a Jedi were laughable?

 

I know I'm sailing close to the wind here, but I refuse to fall at the final hurdle (or restrict my use of metaphor apparently...) This is the second to last entry, and I hope to post the last tomorrow.

I've also decided to continue this diary as the 2016 DDC, so will open a new thread for that in January, covering the remaining time Obi-wan spends on Tatooine. Thank you all for reading!

Tags: Findswoman, serendipityaey, K'Tai qel Letta-Tanku


Entry 23

Dear Qui-Gon,

I am happy to report my lessons with Luke are going well. He has learned to control himself, not as well as I would have expected from a youngling at the Temple, but to a satisfactory degree. Beru has informed me that they’ve had no other incidents of unconscious Force usage like power surges or strong reactions to other's emotional states.

While I know these measures best protect the boy, I cannot help but feel stifled not to show him more. He is so powerful, Qui-Gon. Even in this barren environment with my own Force senses dulled his brilliance is undiminished. I work hard with him to close his mind and erect barriers around his Force sense so his presence cannot be so easily detected by others, but it feels like caging a brilliant bird so it cannot show off its unique plumage. No, it feel rather more like clipping that bird’s wings.

I spend most of my days at the Lars homestead, and often Beru leaves Luke with me while she goes about her day’s work. I suppose she trusts me enough now, not to break my agreement with them and only teach Luke to control and suppress his abilities.

It was incredibly hot today, even by Tatooine standards, so by the time I reached the homestead poor Rooh was dripping with sweat (as was her poor master!). I often let the eopie into my hut in such conditions, for companionship as well as anything else. When I mentioned this to Beru she laughed as if I was making a joke, and then gave me a stern look which clearly said there were to be no animals allowed in her house not matter the circumstances.

So before we began our lessons I enlisted Luke to help me wash the creature down with a synthetic saline solution I had bought in Mos Eisley the last time I was there on business for Jabba. It is expensive but not moreso than the amount of water needed would be, and Rooh seems to find relief when it is rubbed into her hide.

Luke loves Rooh, often patting her and giggling when she snuffles her snout into his hair. He talks to her also, and I cannot blame him for that, since I often ramble to her myself. Through the Force I feel her emotions and moods, but today when I observed Luke stroking her neck and babbling away I noticed that his conversation did not appear to be one-sided. He asked the animal questions and acted as if he had heard a response; enquiring whether she preferred the saline rub or baths, what the Dune Sea was like at night, whether she’d ever been ridden past a Tusken Raider camp.

“Luke,” I asked nonchalantly, rubbing the solution into the eopie’s spine. “Are you talking to Rooh?”

Luke laughed and gave Rooh a look as if I was the strange one. “Of course, Ben!”

“And does she talk back?”

“Yes."

“You mean you’re playing a game,” I asked, although I knew I wasn’t going to get the answer I wanted. “Eopie’s aren’t sentient, they can’t speak or form thoughts like we can.”

Luke looked to Rooh and then back at me, biting his lip before answering. “I can hear her, in my head,” he explained, pointing at his temple with one finger. “It’s not like people talk, but she still saying things to me. She wants you to rub the stuff into her neck now.”

Rooh turned her head to me, and I couldn’t deny the confirmation in her large eyes. Remembering his skill in healing the dewback and his affinity for animals I couldn’t think otherwise, and dutifully transferred my attention to her long neck.

“Luke,” I put my hand on his shoulder when I’d finished, and he looked up at me with wide blue eyes. “You know not everyone can hear an animal’s thoughts.”

“Yeah.” Luke looked down and scuffed his boot in the sand. “Aunt Beru says I mustn’t tell about what I can do.”

“That’s right,” I told him. “You can listen, but it is best if you don’t respond.”

“But isn’t that mean?” Luke asked. “I don’t wanna ignore them.”

“They are used to it,” I assured him, and patted Rooh’s side. “And it is for the best, Luke. I know you don’t understand now, but someday I promise I will explain it all to you.”

Luke huffed. “Okay.” But he put his little arms around Rooh’s neck and gave her a sloppy kiss while I continued to bathe her down.

“Why do you live alone?” Luke asked and appeared at my side again. “Rooh says…” He slapped his hand over his mouth at his slip, and then sighed. “I mean, it must be lonely out there.”

“It can be,” I nodded, uncomfortable with the new line of questioning. “When I was your age I lived in a grand Temple where I studied with thousands of other children, and learnt wonderful things.”

Luke squinted in the bright sunlight, holding one hand to shield his eyes. “Why aren’t you there now?”

Oh, how such innocent words can sting. “Because I am no longer a student.”

“You mean you learned everything?”

I chuckled softly, and mussed Luke’s hair. “No, little one. If there’s one thing the last few years have taught me, it’s that you never stop learning.”

“Is that what you’re teaching me?” Luke asked. “What you learned at that place?”

I had promised myself I would never lie to the child – mislead and misconstrue perhaps – but never lie. “Some of it,” I said carefully, looking around the make sure Beru was nowhere in sight. Likely she was inside so we could not be overheard. “Discipline and control is an important part of what I learned at the Temple.”

“But not all of it,” Luke nodded in understanding.

“No,” I said. “I am like you, Luke. I can do things other cannot, and where grew up was a place where I was taught to do much more.”

“Like what?”

This was an error, Qui-Gon, but I could not help myself. How long had it been since I had used the Force properly, and Luke so desperately wanted to know! I was weak, I admit.

“This,” I said, holding out my hand and lifting him up into the air. He shrieked in delight and I had to tell him to shush, which he did as soon as he figured out he could turn a somersault in mid-air. I knew I was treading close to the line, so slowly lowered him back into the sand as Luke grinned from ear to ear.

“And you could teach me to do that?” he asked, eyes wide and expectant.

“Well, your Aunt and Uncle wouldn’t like it…”

“Oh, please Ben!” He rushed over to me, tugging in the sleeve of my tunic. “Please, I won’t tell anyone, I promise!”

What could I say? In hindsight there may have been some duplicity in my actions but I swear Qui-Gon in the moment it did not seem that way. All I saw was a young boy eager to learn, and my own worries that teaching him only to suppress his abilities would do more harm than good.


What Owen doesn’t know won’t hurt him.

 

Luke is such an empathic child. His compassion started early. And Ben truly loves Luke, that's for sure. But to be denied that ability that can bring such delight - that must be tough. Although Mara was always one for scolding about playing with the Force, you gotta admit it must be tempting.

I love how Luke can converse with other beings. He may not "speak" with Rooh as she can't manipulate symbolic language and grammar, but he understands her. Don't we do the same thing with our pets? I know my cat gets me to do whatever she wants.

 

Love this post - it's such fun to play with littles, and Ben desperately needs some fun. Kids and animals provide it so freely.

 

I just love the playful nature of Obi-Wan in this entry. And little Luke is just so sensitive yet curious. Somehow, I am imagining Owen finding out somehow.

I love this diary and I am so excited to see it continue next year.

 

Oooh, I love the eagerness and the natural talent Luke is displaying. I am totally not surprised that Obi-Wan is eager to teach and share, although he has misgivings.

 

Findswoman, serendipityaey, K'Tai qel Letta-Tanku

Entry 24

Dear Qui-Gon,

Today’s entry will be short, as I am not sure when I will have the strength to write again. The situation here has become most distressing but I know I must record my immediate thoughts – at the very least for later examination and reflection.


I thought lessons with Luke had been going so well even though I was slowly teaching him beyond what had been agreed between myself and the Lars’. It was simple Force skills, really, levitation of small objects, honing senses, even basic kata – all harmless in my eyes, and Luke excelled, eager to learn and pleased when he had accomplished a new skill.

But halfway through today’s lesson, when Luke had successfully lifted a spoon with his mind and gotten it to dance in midair, he gasped and the utensil dropped hard onto the floor. I turned around to see Owen and Beru standing in the doorway, evidently having returned three hours early from their trip into town.

Beru looked confused and betrayed; Owen merely angry.

“Come here, Luke,” Beru held out her arms to him, and he ran to her obediently. She swept him up and held his head against her shoulder, stroking his hair as he began to sniffle. If I could feel Owen’s rage through the Force, there was no doubt Luke could, and probably more keenly.

“What is this, Kenobi?” Owen demanded, scowling at the spoon on the floor.

There was no point in lying, and I reached out through the Force, trying to calm Owen’s mind but he swatted at the air as if at a bug, and I retreated knowing that it was not an option.

“Telekinesis,” I said, keeping my voice even and soothing. “It is a Jedi skill.”

A crease formed between Beru’s eyes. “I thought you agreed not to teach him any of that?”

I spread my hands, trying to look apologetic. “I have taught him to control and discipline, enough to keep him safe. But the boy is so strong in the Force, and so eager to learn I thought it harmless.”

Beru’s face took on an uncharacteristic hardness as she held Luke closer to her. “Then why did you not discuss it with us first, instead of going against our express wishes?”

“You know why, Beru,” Owen said, shooting me a murderous look. “He knew what we would say. But he is the high and mighty Jedi, and were a simple farm folk, so clearly he thinks he knows best. Just like that Jedi who took Anakin away said it was for the best – I know, Shmi told me. They said they would teach him to use his powers to help people – protect them – but instead they ruined him.” Owen’s mouth twisted bitterly, and in that moment I knew I had underestimated his resentment of the Jedi.

“But I’m not going to let you do that to Luke,” Owen shook his head. “Get out of my house.”

“Owen, please-”

“Get out of my house!” Owen roared, clutching my robe and physically dragging me up and out of the homestead despite my protests. When we reached the ridge above the home he thrust me out and I tumbled down into the sand.

“Stay away from my family!” Owen ordered me, kicking sand in my face as a spluttered and tried to stand, raising my hands palms outward in an effort for conciliation.

“Owen, I apologise, I should have talked to you first. But I believe that forcing Luke to hide his abilities will only put him in more danger in the future-”

“The only danger he is in is from you,” Owen pointed his finger at me. “We’ve tried to compromise, tried to understand, but no more – I see now you are a liar as well as a fraud.”

I tried to explain myself, but something about my manner or words only incensed Owen further, and behind him Luke ran out of the homestead, tears in his eyes.

“Ben!” Luke cried. “Don’t go!”

“Luke,” I called and tried to go to him but Owen blocked my way. I was not prepared to use the Force against him, and so tried to get round physically but felt only Owen’s hard fist slam into my jaw. When I tried again he began to punch me in earnest, and how could I fight back against him with Luke there watching?

Luckily Beru appeared and I looked to her for support. But I found only resentment at my betrayal of her friendship and trust – she shook her head at me before scooping Luke up and taking him back into the homestead without a second glance.

Without his family to witness Owen became even more violent. He attacked, and I could only retreat, but he held me in place and punched me in the face repeatedly.

“I won’t let you do to him what you did to Anakin!” Owen screamed at me in a rage. “Anakin was good before you Jedi took him away. He was good - Shmi told me so!”

I took the beating - what else could I do? It was not underserved, his words not without truth - from a certain point of view. They had given me a chance to prove myself, to remain true to my word but my arrogance and pride had ruined everything.

Owen’s face was red and angry tears spilled down his cheeks; for the step-mother who had taken him in and loved him without reserve, for the step-brother he had never gotten the chance to know, and now for Luke who was the only thing of Shmi he had left. Soon enough he turned away, leaving me bruised and shamed on the sand, unwilling to even lift a hand in my own defence.

I backed up, nodding and admitting defeat, knowing that I would pay severely for my error in judgement. Rooh had pulled free from her tether and ran to my side, her coarse tonge licking my wounded face. I grasped at her gratefully, pulling myself to my feet and looking over one last time at Owen.

“You stay away, Kenobi,” he called as Rooh and I retreated. “You come near this homestead again and I will shoot you.”

I believe him, and do not blame him. I have made all of the same mistakes in new ways, and perhaps it is better if the boy grows up knowing nothing to his heritage, without the taint of the Jedi who had failed his father and now him.

I will watch Luke from afar. It saddens my heart dreadfully as I have become so very fond of the boy. Not hearing his laugh, his cheerful chatter and insightful questions is as much a loss to me as the chance to properly train him as a Jedi.

But it is still too raw to write anything further, Qui-Gon, and can only sign off your erstwhile apprentice,

Obi-Wan Kenobi.