main
side
curve
  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Saga Vader: The Fire In Darkness 1/2 *ROTS spoilers/rumor*

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Droid4sale, Nov 30, 2004.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Droid4sale

    Droid4sale Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Apr 6, 2004
    Disclaimer: The characters belong to George Lucas, but the Darkside calls them to me.
    Title: Vader: The Fire In Darkness
    Author: Droid4Sale
    Timeframe: ROTS
    Characters: Anakin/Vader, Padmé, Bail, OC, Obi-Wan and Palpatine.
    Genre: Angst, romance, action, A/A, PT/AU
    Keywords: ROTS angst/romance/action
    Summary: The end (speculation//**spoilers**) for Anakin and Padmé.
    Notes: Rated a strong PG-13 for violence. Deepest thanks to Jazz_Skywalker for her fantastic job as a first draft beta reader. Your suggestions were very helpful. To DantanaSkywalker- thank you for the keyboard bit.
    -This story probably needs another beta treatment and if any of you feel up to it?please drop me a PM.

    **********

    Padmé Skywalker proceeded slowly and with some difficulty through the dark mining passages of the droid fabrication facility. She was ever mindful of the great danger placed on her by coming here, but more importantly the threat it presented to the life of her unborn child.

    The facility she searched was located on the planet Mustafar. It was a land of infernos comprised mostly of volcanic rock. The planet was nothing more than a blazing hell residing at the farthest reaches of space. At one time it had been considered by the Republic as a candidate for a prison colony, but was eventually voted down because of the inhospitable nature of the environment. No one wanted the costly responsibility and as a result the planet lay dormant for centuries.

    Or so the Republic and the Jedi had believed.

    Much like Geonosis, the Separtists under the direction of Count Dooku and Darth Sidious had inhabited the fiery planet. Here the machines operated day and night, creating droids for their army.

    Also unbeknownst to the Jedi was Mustafar?s duel purpose. A technologically advanced procedure was underway to mine enormous quantities of raw materials. The amount of metal elements harvested could be useful for creating starships, buildings and space stations.

    Padmé made note of the manufacturing, but her main agenda was to locate her husband, Anakin, first. Before he had left, Anakin had instructed her to wait for him and that when Palpatine?s directive was complete he would return. Looking back, she should never have agreed to let him go. As the questions multiplied her hindsight was of little benefit. It became more a source of frustration than an aid.

    Most unnerving to her at the time was that he did not lead on to the nature of his mission on Mustafar. While she hadn?t appreciated his vagueness the circumstance was no different than the long periods of silence during the Clone Wars. She would continue to trust his judgment and wait for him as requested. Never in their years together had he kept anything from her.

    Up to that point there wasn?t a reason to doubt Anakin until Obi-Wan visited Padmé on Coruscant. Before she even had a chance to absorb the news of the invasion at the Jedi Temple, Obi-Wan had already put into motion a plan to send her to the planet of Alderaan. He felt she would be safest there under Bail Organa?s care.

    Did Obi-Wan assume Anakin would kill her too?

    As he presented her with the details she faced Anakin?s former Master in stunned silence. She read the expression on the Jedi?s face, searching for any clue that he too had doubts, but there was none. The icy depths of the Jedi?s blue eyes and stern gaze confronted her with the hard truth about her husband?s mission for Palpatine. Obi-Wan tried his best to comfort her despite his pain and anger.

    ?He has chosen this path through his actions, Padmé. He now serves Darth Sidious, the man who duped us all as Chancellor Palpatine. Anakin is a member of the Sith and he carries a new name-- Darth Vader. The Anakin we once knew is no more. Master Yoda and I witnessed him alongside clone troopers murder the Jedi on the Temple security holocam. It?s not easy for you to hear this, but I have to find him and make him accountable for what he has done. I?m sorry, Senator, truly sorry. I must fulfill my Jedi duty.?
     
  2. VadersMistress

    VadersMistress Jedi Knight star 6

    Registered:
    Apr 7, 2004
    AGH! I am so sorry about this, but I don't have the chance to read all of it right now. Though, I will definitely be coming back for more. :D From what I have read all I can say is WOW! You have done an excellent job. Bravo on this one.
     
  3. Jazz_Skywalker

    Jazz_Skywalker Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Aug 3, 2002
    Deepest thanks to Jazz_Skywalker for her fantastic job as a first draft beta reader. Your suggestions were very helpful.

    Aww, thanks! I love the final draft!

    Vader leaned in close to his wife and looked on her with eyes as cold as the arms of death reaching out for her.

    ?Soon, my Angel, you will learn your place and do my bidding.?


    Wow...very chilling!

    JS
     
  4. Droid4sale

    Droid4sale Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Apr 6, 2004
    VadersMistress
    AGH! I am so sorry about this, but I don't have the chance to read all of it right now. Though, I will definitely be coming back for more. From what I have read all I can say is WOW! You have done an excellent job. Bravo on this one.

    Take your time. I posted 3/4 of it. I'm still not happy with the ending and I'm not going to write the whole duel (that's GL's job) ha. Thank you for your comments and I hope you enjoy reading the whole thing.

    Jazz_Skywalker
    Deepest thanks to Jazz_Skywalker for her fantastic job as a first draft beta reader. Your suggestions were very helpful.

    Aww, thanks! I love the final draft!

    Vader leaned in close to his wife and looked on her with eyes as cold as the arms of death reaching out for her.

    ?Soon, my Angel, you will learn your place and do my bidding.?

    Wow...very chilling!

    JS


    Thanks so much again! I might just shoot over the end to you if I change it alot from what you last read to get your opinion. (If that's ok?)

    Okay... well I think I'm going to write a short happy-kinda bit for the holiday. Light fare to cleanse my thoughts.

     
  5. Droid4sale

    Droid4sale Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Apr 6, 2004
    Bumpity bump.

    I'm going to finish this in a bit, but decided to work on rhondaroo's fun holiday challenge. Sometimes you just gotta take a break from gloom.

    Until then-- could you folks please leave some feedback. I'm a newer writer here and want to be a regular poster. I can only improve if you help me polish my skills.

    I'm starting out in a familiar realm and hope to expand outward to OC and such.

    Thanks for your time...

    D4S
     
  6. Alethia

    Alethia Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Feb 13, 2005
    Excellent. I like the way you characterized the characters. And just the entire way you wrote this. It's amazing how similar this is to ROTS, with a few descrepancies, but nonetheless reamarkably similar. Specially since I don't think the info about the scene between Padme and Vader has been out that long, and this was written some months ago.

    Please update soon. This is really an excellent fic. I already mentioned the characterization. And it flows well too. The way Padme realizes and calls him Vader, the memories of Qui Gon of Obi Wan's- everything fits so well together.

    I really loved this and I want more.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.