Week 10, Day Task 2

AmazingB · AmazingB, Jul 10, 2003 at 12:37 PM

So this was originally going to be a weekly task, but due to it likely taking less time to complete and with less hassle than my other task and that the week is almost over, it'll just be another Day Task.

We're falling back on the old standby of writing an essay. The topic: Where is cbjedi? I trust you'll all your creativeness for this. Let's say 24 hours, maybe a few more depending on when I'm around tomorrow. You can post your stories in here.

Amazing.

B'omarr · B'omarr, Jul 10, 2003 at 1:18 PM

Driving his cab on the streets late at night, meditating on the subtle fragilities of life and the universe, cbjedi was hailed. As he pulled over, his cab sliding to the side of the damp, dark street, he noticed his customer was a nicely dressed woman. A dame. A broad. A fox. A fine philly.

She got in. "I need to get to east 1st avenue" she said in a husky voice. cb didn't remember a 1st Avenue in town, but before he could say anything, the woman breathed out "...in New Orleans."

"Ooookay." cb wondered. He put the cab in gear and started driving through the city, it's streets deserted in the dead part of the night. The woman leaned over from the back seat, and breathing soft warm breath onto cb's neck, she crooned, "Want to see a dead body?"

cb's eyes grew wide. He started slowing the cab.

"No, keep going!" the woman suddenly yelled. "My husband is chasing after me!"

Just as she said this a pair of headlights appeared in the rear window of the cab. Growling, the sped towards the cab quickly, not slowing down, read to split the yellow checkered car in half. cb floored it.

He drove all through the night, the headlights hounding him the entire time. He crossed the border into the states, the menacing headlights stayed a few cars back the entire time. cb kept those lights from closing in, and everytime he thought he had lost the menacing lights, they kept following.

They say he's still out there driving around somewhere. Still out there to this very day. The mysterious woman breathing warm, sweetsmelling breath in the back of the cab, tantalizing with her seductiveness, while the mysterious ominous headlights follow the cab whereever it goes.

Katya Jade · Katya Jade, Jul 10, 2003 at 6:12 PM

[image=http://www.galaxynet.com/~corvid/images/rod_sml.jpg]

Submitted for your approval. This is the story of a man. A man who so desperately wanted a new couch that he would accept any consequences in order to possess it. That man is cbjedi...

As cb sat on his living room floor watching tv, he realized that something would have to be done so that he could procure himself a couch.

"I love eating on the floor, picnic style," cb thought to himself, "but my rear end gets numb after awhile. I must have a couch! No matter what!"

So, the next day, cb drove his cab down to the local sofa retailer. He looked around for quite awhile. He sat on the couches. He laid down on the couches. He napped on the couches.

Then, while arising from a pleasant nap on one of the couches in the "African Safari Collection", cb saw the couch of his dreams.

[image=http://www.palliser.com/images/db/6734.jpg]

It was beautiful. Perfect. He approached it carefully and studied the way the light playfully danced across the leather. As he sat on the couch, he knew in his heart that this was the perfect addition to his living room. It was as if it was calling to him.

He ran to the salesperson.

"I want the couch in the the back corner!"

The salesperson looked up at him in surprise. "The back corner, sir?"

"Yes! The beautiful tan leather couch with the reclining option!" cb was so excited he could hardly stand it.

"Sir..I have to tell you. That couch is a return to the store. The previous owners were less than satisfied. I'm afraid..."

cb cut the salesperson off. "I don't care! It's perfect. How much?"

"Well, seeing as how it's a returned item, I'll give you a discount. But are you really certain you want that couch?"

"Yes. I told you already, I'm taking the couch."

The salesperson just nodded his head and handed cb the paperwork. All completed, cb thanked the salesperson and drove home to await the delivery of his new couch.

He arrived at home and hurridly cleaned the carpet and arranged his living room furniture in preparation for his new couch. He sat on the floor and waited for the delivery.

The next afternoon, having neither slept nor eaten in anticipation of his new couch, the doorbell rang.

He uncrossed his legs with great difficulty and hobbled to the door. Opening his front door, he saw his couch sitting there. Waiting. Lovely.

The papers signed, the deliverymen set the couch in the middle of his living room.

"Good luck, man. You'll need it." The large deliveryman said to him. The smaller deliveryman just shook his head in agreement.

"Let's get out of here." The two men hurridly left cb's apartment and slammed the door behind them.

cb turned to his new couch and smiled. "You're all mine now. All mine precious."

He crossed over the living room floor and stood in front of the couch. Slowly, he turned around and sat on the luxurious leather.

As if in a dream, the couch reclined without him touching any lever or device. After a few moments, cb drifted off to sleep. Not realizing, not knowing, that the couch had begun to fold him inside its rich, leathery arms.

It was as if a Venus Flytrap had opened and consumed it's prey. The recliner folded close and the couch sat in cb's living room. Silent. Alone. Waiting.

[image=http://www.areacom.it/arte_cultura/confini/ROD.JPG]

This was the story of a man. A man so consumed with his need to buy a snazzy new couch that he didn't listen to the warnings. Warnings that would have told him that his new, beautiful couch was a doorway to....The Twilight Zone.

Mrs_Kitty · Mrs_Kitty, Jul 11, 2003 at 9:48 AM

On June 30 some time after 7:42 am board time, cbjedi, logged off the JC. Knowing that the 4th of July was coming up, he decided he wanted to go somewhere other than the places around Canada. So, he decided to go to North Carolina to go see James.

The next morning, cbjedi got up early and started towards NC in his cab. Cbjedi finally made it to NC some time on July 3. "Good I made it just in time to see James on the 4th," he smiled to himself. But he forgot one thing; he didn?t know where James lived at. He knew James lived in Matthews, NC and what his last name was.

Cbjedi drove around to see if he could find a phone booth. Finally, he found one, but it didn?t have a phone book. After about 2 more phone booths, he finally found one that had a phone book in it. He turned the pages to the "T" section. Finally, he found James?s last name, but there were also 10 different people with that last name. Cbjedi groaned, "I guess I?m going to have to go all 10 of these houses."

Cbjedi tried 9 of the names, but they all said the same thing, "sorry, I don?t know anybody by the name of James". Finally, on the 4th, cbjedi came to the last name, "Well, this one has to be it, and I?m still here on time," he smiled at himself again.

He went up to the door and knocked on it, after a couple of seconds past by, a very young boy came to the door. Cbjedi leaned down to be at eye level with the kid, "Do you have an older brother by the name of James?"

The little boy nodded.

Cbjedi jumped up with joy, "Is he home?"

The little boy shook his head.

What? This can?t be. Calm down cb, maybe he?s just out with some friends. "Do you know where he is?"

The little boy nodded his head.

Suddenly an older woman stood behind the kid. "May I help you?"

Cbjedi stood up, "I was looking for James, I?m a friend of his from Canada."

"I?m sorry, but James doesn?t live here any more. He moved to Rhode Island to be with his girlfriend."

"Oh, thank you," and with that cbjedi left, got in his cab and headed for Rhode Island.

Two days later cbjedi got to Rhode Island, then it hit him, he didn?t know Sara?s last name or what city she lived in. Why didn?t I ask James?s mother when I had the chance? I guess I?m going to have to go to every single house in Rhode Island and ask if they know where Sara and James live. I?m just glad Rhode Island ain?t that big.

Now, we know what has happened to cbjedi, he just wanted to go spend some time with his friend on the 4th.

TheEmperorsHand · TheEmperorsHand, Jul 11, 2003 at 12:43 PM

Where did cbjedi go? (HP spoiler blacked out)

Now we've all know of cbjedi as a cab driver who likes to hang out at this place called the JC in his spare time. But, alas, what has happened to our Big Brother? He seems to have disappeared off the face of Canada, or at least the internet. Did his computer break, causing him to realize that life exists outside of the internet? Did he finally realize that Sirius Black really is dead, causing him to become depressed and sit around yelling at his Harry Potter book all day? Was he kidnapped by crazy tourists in his cab? Was he kicked offline one too many times, causing him to throw out his computer and move to an Amish settlement? No, none of these bizarre possibilities happened to our dear cbjedi.

It is stranger. You see, cb was out one night driving his cab home after finishing up when he sad weird lights on the horizon. His first thought was, "Wow! A UFO! If I could get a picture, I'd be rich and I wouldn't have to drive this cab anymore. Then I could spend all my time at the JC!"

So, being this excited, cb drove towards the lights until they were directly overhead. Then he stopped, got out of his cab and looked. He was astonished to see a spacecraft directly overhead.

He began furiously taking pictures. Then, quite suddenly, he was beamed up and abducted by aliens who had been watching the JC, particularly Big Brother House.

The aliens were quite proud of themselves for capturing BB himself, since they apparently thought that this was the purpose of the game. Now they are refusing to let him go until BB Game ends and he agrees to declare them the winners.

So expect him back sometime in he future, at which point the JC will be taken over by aliens.

THE END

Leonard_Shelby · Leonard_Shelby, Jul 12, 2003 at 10:09 PM

Good work, everyone!

I guess it's about time I get mine done, eh?

[image=http://www.newgenevacenter.org/portrait/reagan.jpg]

Ronnie.

1:27am

It was a beautiful mid-summers night and day evening. The glorious leaves were breaching upon said trees and brush. But the brush? The brush you say? That's right.

2:36pm

Suddenly...and without any flipping warning...an unbeknownst to the knownst simpleton cab driver--cbjedi--became knownst to what was knownst....all must be knownst.

10:25.023am

[image=http://images.art.com/images/PRODUCTS/large/10036000/10036929.jpg]

4:25pm

Once becoming knownst to the knownst, cbjedi decided it was time for action. So he did what all good cabbies do...rent a number two pencil.

12:98pm

When out of the shadows sprang-out an evil number two pencil. Yep. Don't argue.

34:56pm

Cb just knew that action was in order. I mean...how could this evil number two pencil just become evil without being privy to the knownst? Just didn't seem possible at the moment. So action must've been taken once it was taken because it just had to be. There was no other way...

2:56am

[image=http://www.cuisinart-vs-kitchenaid.com/images/blenders-diagram.gif]

Interesting...

3:33apm

Welp, time was due for some overdue action to be taken on cb's part. I mean, the knownst to those who are beknownst to the knownst just had to be known. If he knew that these evil number two pencils were gonna come after him and his cab, he would've just bought a sub sandwich and cigarette butts and called it a half-night morning...

2:22am

Twilight fell. cb knew it to be true. He fought hard into the night with the evil number two pencil...it just had to be. They fought from the lowest peak to the highest basement. It just happened and happened...

2:56am

A branch suddenly fell from the sky. Confusedly, cb looked up to the sky in a confused and non-confused manner....confusedly speaking...

3:45am

The number two pencil took this moment to strike. And strike it did. The non-confused and confusedly content cb was too busy looking at said non-confusing branch. When suddenly....it happened...

3:45am with four point five seconds to go 'til 3:46am

[image=http://www.black-sabbath.com/images/members/ozzy/ozzykermit.jpg]

THE BEGINNING OF THE CHAPTERS

[image=http://locofonic.alphalink.com.au/pix2/jaws.jpg]

"The Fish Are Out Of Water..."

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Week 10, Day Task 2

AmazingB Manager Emeritus

B'omarr Jedi Grand Master

Katya Jade Comms Admin & Community Overlord

Mrs_Kitty Jedi Grand Master

TheEmperorsHand Jedi Grand Master

Leonard_Shelby Jedi Grand Master