[Week 5 Task] Vjiking Camp

Step 1: Read the Saxon Violence thread first!!

Hello, murderous throng, and welcome to Vjiking Camp!



If you have not already done so, you may give yourself colors. Posting a Vjiking name and bio in this thread are also encouraged. Dark Ages persona generator again. If several hours go by and you have inexplicably failed to create a persona, I may do so for you. It might be sillier than you'd like.

The persona generator presents a small problem if you are female, though, since "female Vjiking warrior" is not an option.

Here are a couple of pictures of Valkyries to offset the bias of historical accuracy. Use them or something similar if need be:

[image=http://img261.imageshack.us/img261/4985/valkyrie1dr4.gif]

[image=http://img505.imageshack.us/img505/6544/valkyrie2rx2.gif]

If you want to rack up some serious role-playing brownie points, you could visit the Heromachine again, and create a picture of "yourself" as the Ultimate Vjiking Chick Warrior.

Everton the terribly-confused time traveler already gave us his pic:

[image=http://img467.imageshack.us/img467/9877/evertonki4.gif]

He will inexplicably find himself living with the Vjikings, however, and if he wants to dress himself up in Vjiking gear in order to be inconspicuous, that's his business. (Again, you can upload your picture into the Dark Ages Persona Generator, but you don't have to.)

YOUR INSTRUCTIONS, ONCE AGAIN

1) Give the Oppressed Persons inside the monastery strange and ridiculous orders, so that they may entertain you. So long as they're amusing, they may live.

2) Roam around behaving like a bunch of deranged Vjikings . . . who are a little like actual Vikings, only sillier and much more interested in wild parties, mead, and sheep. The reason you like sheep need never be made clear. It's possible that they're just better-looking than the Saxon women.

[image=http://img255.imageshack.us/img255/5973/rockmordordv8.gif]

Your movement on the BB forum is not restricted--except that you may not post in the monastery thread. They have locked you out of there. Other than that, go where you want, do what you want. You've only got a week left, anyway. Go as nuts as the TOS allows. (Although the lesson of the Girls' House Uber-Spam-Spree was that completely trashing your forum might not seem like such a good idea 24 hours later.)

3) Chase down Oppressed Persons if they try to escape. They can try to dash out of the monastery and post in other threads besides their monastery one, and they might just get away with it if you don't keep watch. You "catch" an oppressed person by finding their post within 5 minutes of the time they made it, and posting afterward (for time-stamp proof) that you have caught them and done something appalling to them. Fed them to the sea-snails or something. They actually don't really stay "dead" . . . somehow they always manage to limp back to their monastery, but you can rest easy in knowing that you have exposed someone's attempts to violate their role-playing rules--thus lowering their score, and increasing your chances of looking good by comparison.

4) Do not announce that you have "killed" an Oppressed Person for no reason. Sufficient grounds for attempted murder include escape from the besieged monastery, and a total failure to try and role-play being a peasant behaving ridiculously. If someone is trying to perform for you and just isn't funny, heckling and more specific orders are preferable.

5) Remain in-character while in the Viking Camp thread, unless you are posting info about your character. You do not need to remain in-character everywhere at all times, but if someone speaks to you in-character, it's encouraged to

 

OOC: Here's what happened to me:

I have assigned myself a persona, which is not mine, but the effects of time-travel have dumped upon me.

Here is me as I appear:

[image=http://www.bluealert.co.uk/images/eadric.jpg]

I am, err, supposedly, Eadric The Fierce Ruler.

Eadric, whom my time-travel has displaced (in a sorta Quantum Leap fashion) lives in Southern Scandanavia with his wife, two infant sons ad a servant girl.

I am a Longship Building Supervisor by Summer, and a player of tafl board games by winter. I am brave, unconcerned by death, and a fan of Porridge.



In actuality, I am Alan an middle manager at a Cracker Factory. I drive a grey car and enjoy scrabble. My greatest ambition in life is to return home from work at precisely the same each day for a clean decade. The inconvenient time travel occured when on the 364th day of the ninth year, I depressed the button on my doorbell and was swept out of time. My suitcase containing my emergency pajamas was left behind.

 

Funny, my name is Eadric too!
But I go by EADRIC (ALL CAPS).

Here is my profile.
I edited a few things in ParchmentShop(tm). I don't think anyone will know they are edited though.
[image=http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c62/cvzdesign/bb/viking.png]

 

I am known as Geira the She-Bear, and that's all I know so far.

OOC: Posting from work, see ya guys later.

 

I am Brjiann, The Stone Wielder!

[image=http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c80/bosouder/brianviking.jpg]

History: Found on the shores of Iceland by his future Nordic brothers, Brjiann is one of the Vjiking's most fiercesome warriors. Dreadlocked and fierce, he loves smashing his opponents' skulls in with his trusty Mjolner while screaming cryptically "YOU STOOD LITTLE CHANCE AGAINST THE STONE WIELDER!!!" or YSLCATSW, for short (which often makes the cryptic cry all the more cryptic.

Brjiann claims to have been abducted by strange creatures from a foreign world in massive flying discs. He only seems to recall these terrifying events when he's full of mead, which is pretty much whenever he's not actively killing and pillaging (and sometimes even then).

 

This character may appear in times of desperation.

She is Øfeljia the Nøøb Mød, whose origins are obscure and whose outfit is laughable. She claims to have special powers conferred upon her by Asgard, and has indeed been known to make users disappear, but they always seem to come back later, anyway.

We don't know where she goes when she disappears. If she's smart, it's to Target to buy something that doesn't look like a $1.98 Halloween costume.

[image=http://img67.imageshack.us/img67/8404/ofeljiapj5.gif]

 

[image=http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v258/darthmorella/morellaviking2.jpg]

This is Geira the Bear-Like, and she earned this name because she is hairy and growls a lot. She enjoys long walks on the forest and killing the occasional peasant, to later claim their scalp and add it to her winter-coat (not depicted here). Like any good vjiking damsel, Geira likes sheep, eating meat off the bones, and gulp gallons of mead. The males of her tribe think she's too ladylike and that she burps "like a weak old lady", which brings shame upon Geira and she practices her burping as much as she can, to earn the respect of her tribe and maybe attract a good vjiking husband.

 

EARDIC(ALL CAPS) The Handsome Cow likes to club bunnies.
The fluffier they are, the better they squeak when they get bashed.

Then we fead them to the GHOATS!

 

WHERE ARE MY VIKING BRETHREN??

ACTUALLY, I'M GONNA TAKE A LONG NAP. WAKE ME UP WHEN THE MONKS ARE READY TO BE OVERRUN!

 

**creeping into the viking camp under the shadow of dark, Pandy spots the fair Juliana tied to a tree**

**she is wearing very little, and it is everything Pandy can do to concentrate on the job in hand**

**creeping up to the one they call Eadric The Fierce Ruler, Pandy reached inside Eadric's pocket and, hoping that he wouldn't stir from his sleep again, as he had done just now, murmouring about advertising hoardings - whatever they were(?!?!), Pandy pulled out two small objects he had seen the ruler using from time to time**

**stashing one of the objects in his own pocket, he headed over to where Juliana was tied up - letting the contents of the other object - a small metal flask - pour out behind him as he went - he used a stone to cut her free from her ropes**

Juliana: What the **** are YOU doing here, idiot?!?

Pandy: I'm Pandy Handshandy. I'm here to rescue you.

**together they headed off towards the shore, with Pandy still pouring the contents of the bottle out behind him....**


-JR

 

**the brandy ignited all about the viking camp, and dirty, stupid, sadistic, brutish, miserable, evil, stinking, accursed, mother ****ing, sheep ****ing, rapist vikings where ablaze, also**

[image=http://www.archaeologychannel.org/content/film/BloodVikings1w.jpg]


-JR

 

*puts out fires around Vjiking friends*

HAHAHA!! GOOD BATTLE, LITTLE ONE! YOUR SACRIFICE IS WORTHY OF GLORY! HAVE FUN IN VALHALLA!!

*throws massive bolder into monastery as a sign of respect*

 

???-¤Ø¤-???Øfeljia The Nøøb Mød:???-¤Ø¤-???

::Returns to Asgard, that even sillier realm which Vjikings can aspire to after leaving this silly BB world.::