JCC Well, I finally kicked my father-in-law out

As some of you may be aware, I've been having problems with the fact that my father-in-law somehow convinced the wife to let him move back in with us after a couple years of him being gone. We did not like him living with us years ago, as he's messy, opinionated, self-important, and can be an all around crappy person with some shady friends who help him get his way when he needs them to.

It was obvious then to myself and our close friends that he was using the "I'm here to help with the baby" reason as a front for moving down from New York to Florida. His real reason, we all still suspect, was because he caught wind of my mother-in-law having problems with her new marriage (she and her current husband also live down here) and assumed that this would allow him to have a second chance with her.

During the course of his original time with us, it became obvious that she had no interest in him and was committed to her husband, so he became increasingly difficult to deal with and started laying out threats to me. Stuff like, "You don't know my friends. One call, and I would have you dealt with."

Fast forward to the current situation: he bought a shotgun and brought into our home without telling us and without getting our consent. Own a gun if you want, okay. But in your own house. Not around my kids and not without talking to me first. Things steadily built up with him returning to his disagreeable ways, making me increasingly miserable to be in my own home.

The other night, the wife and I both had to work all day, so her friend's teenage daughter offered to babysit while the father-in-law was supposed to "supervise." I came home late at night from work to find him blasting TV in the living room while my son was sinking into the couch, his diaper falling off because of the weight of accumulated urine and feces, which had now soaked through to the couch.

I confronted him about it and he said, "I can't smell. And diapers are the babysitter's job."

I told my wife, who confronted him about it yesterday morning, to which he gave the same excuse and said that at least he cleaned up the entire house. She argued that the house was a disaster (as it always is when I'm at work), and I couldn't contain my several months of built-up anger anymore. I exploded and told him to leave my house. He started threatening me again, saying things like, "You've really dug yourself in now!"

My dad advised me to file a police report against the ongoing threats, if only to document it. So I did that. Three officers showed up, heard the situation, and told me to get rid of him--probably by way of filing for an injunction. I took the kids to my parents' house and went to work, leaving my wife with her father.

She told me that she told him he has to leave, and apparently he flipped out at her and called her a "[crappy] daughter." He needs a week to move out, so the kids and I are currently staying at my parents. I had my wife had my W2s, passport, and other information too, because her father can be spiteful and shady.

Huh. So I guess he actually kicked me out?

 

Buy a diary, man.

 

I'd be keeping an eye on that situation - make sure he doesn't trash the house or try to burn it down out of spite. Too bad you couldn't have the police remove him.

 

Best thread title of the year.
Too bad the OP doesn't really follow up on it.
Kick the guy out! He's going to find reasons to extend his stay. Say no!

 

Hopefully he'll leave peacefully now. But my advice is that you and your wife should document anything bad he says or does for the next week (and afterwards). Your wife may want to buy a notebook to write down what happens daily while he's still at the house. Just in case.

 

And when he is finally gone, change all the locks.

 

You should probably take your father-in-law to the zoo.

Note: Language

 

Wow. Don't give him a week, would be my advice. Give him two days. How much stuff does he have? After two days, start boxing it up yourself and setting it on the porch/yard/sidewalk/street. Threats of violence mark an end to any relationship. It's time for Moochy McShotgun to move it on out.

 

Gotta say I'm with Hogarth on this one. It sounds like the sooner he's out the better for you and your family.

 

I'm taking notes here about how to freeload on my own children. This is very helpful.

 

Just don't take a shotgun..

 

Hell if it comes down to it and he wants be an ******* ... file a restraining order!

 

Please don't.

 

The advice isn't my objection.

 

why would you tell the internet?

 

Couldn't agree more. He sounds like thoroughly terrible human being. The sooner you kick his ass to curb the better.

 

Asking people to leave isn't the same as making people leave. I think it's prudent for Ezio to be cognizant of the potential difference between the two.

 

Sure, and the last thing he should do is take advice too literally from people who aren't in the situation and maybe can't see all the angles. I offered my opinion and it seems quite a few people agree... but I would feel awful if he took my advice to the letter and provoked a violent reaction.

 

If that happens, I hope he sues you and Pip Wise.

 

My only defense, then, is that advice is not an unarguable command at gun point. Whew! Barely escaped your clever legal maneuverings, Digster.

 

Ezio: he needs a week.
JC: don't give him a week!

 

But to be fair...

Ezio: I've kicked him out!
Ezio: he remains and I have moved out!