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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

What if Darth Maul had captured Queen Amidala?

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Darth Pipes, Aug 12, 1999.

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  1. Darth Pipes

    Darth Pipes Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 1999
    First and foremost, this is my 1000 post. YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Now then, the story. Another great job offsprey5. Liked the speech Anakin said. Very well written

    Darth Pipes
     
  2. Darth Mulacki

    Darth Mulacki Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 4, 1999
    You almost made me cry with anakin's speech
    BRAVO BRAVO.

    Mulacki
     
  3. Shadowen

    Shadowen Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    May 11, 1999
    I suppose I should have said "Attempting to write".

    I don't know where I'll post it, if I even post it. I might post the first bit here as a teaser, as it isn't too disagreeable. But I would most certainly not be able to post he whole thing here.

    Again, that's if I ever finish. If you want, you could e-mail me and ask for details on how I'm doing sometime, and if I really couldn't get any farther, I might even hand the story over.

    Sorry to take up so much of your valuable story space.
     
  4. Darth Jigglypuff

    Darth Jigglypuff Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Jan 9, 2000
    Back to the top !
     
  5. Darth Predator

    Darth Predator Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 23, 1999
    I await the next post...
     
  6. Darth Pipes

    Darth Pipes Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 1999
    I'll handle the next post on Darth Maul in a few hours.

    Darth Pipes
     
  7. offsprey5

    offsprey5 Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Mar 18, 1999
    Almost, Darth Mul?,hmm I'm going to have to work on that.

    *********************************************

    Obi-Wan sped along the general directions the "becon" was giving them,hoping to find a ship at the end.
    Artoo began beeping and chriping more urgently,getting Anakin's attention.

    "Say again." He asked Artoo,trying to speak away from the wind. Artoo beeped and chriped the same message."Hmmm.Okay."

    He tapped Obi-Wan. "Artoo says that the Queen gave him the signature ring used to sign treaties."

    "Really," Obi-Wan replied,eyebrows raised,"I wonder what she thinks we can do with it."

    "Hide it,I guess. Any treaty is wrothless..turn this way," Anakin pointed to the left as the becon signal shifted.

    "Without it," Obi-Wan finished,more of reason than The Force. Artoo let out a short burst of beeps seemily in agreement. His twisted in perplex thought."We'll study it when we get to Coruscant."

    They finally came a large,dark and angluar form,darking in the Tatoonie twilight. They rode up the side by the open ramp as two seeker drones arched out the bay,buzzing around like angry insects.
    One darted for Obi-Wan,it's mini-blasters charged up and ready.Obi-Wan raised and ignited his lightsaber in one quick motion as the seeker fired.

    The other moved toward Anakin up close,then stopped.Anakin followed it movements nervously as it looked at Anakin up and down and hovered seemily in confusion.

    Obi-Wan was able to deflect the first blast.The seeker shifted and fired again.This time Obi-Wan cuased the bolt to bouce back at the seeker and hit it squarely,blowing it into many pieces. Obi-Wan looked around and saw the seeker staring at Anakin. He stabbed it with his lightsaber and it too was destroyed.

    Anakin looked at Obi-Wan in stunned silence. "Looks like someone stirred the nest." Obi-Wan said finally as he dismounted the bike.He looked at the ramp."Probably need to go on foot in case," He said to himself. he turned toward Anakin. "Stay here for a moment." He moved quickly toward the ramp.

    "But.." Anakin protested.

    "No buts,stay there for the moment." Obi-Wan moved up the ramp cautionously but with speed. He braced himself as he felt the cold rising chill of the Dark Side enveloped him.

    *********************************************


    [This message has been edited by offsprey5 (edited 01-26-2000).]
     
  8. offsprey5

    offsprey5 Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Mar 18, 1999
    *********************************************
    Obi-Wan enter slowly into dimmly-lit bay of the ship,reaching out with Force to detect any life while to buffer himself against the dark side chill.
    The ultraviolet and red lights gave the ship an seemily shifting double hue and ghostly shadows on the objects and bulkhead angles along the walls. This hidered Obi-Wan eyesight,even when Force-enhanced. He did detect,however a slowing increasing odor of blood,burning flesh,and charred metal.
    Obi-Wan pulled out a small glowtube and pointed it in the direction of the scent. Going to the upper levels,the light bounced off a severed head and torn body of a Tusken Raider,his desert garb matted with blood also splattered on the wall and floor. He also saw the tell-tale signs of blaster scoring clotting the blood on jagged row of large spots still glowing faintly on the edges along the wall next to the body.
    Obi-Wan breathe deeply though the mouth and ignited his lightsaber. He detected a very faint sign of life from the darken other end of the room. He shines his light in that direction quickly.
    There,startled by the light and barely reactive,was another Tusken.He was slump over,suspended with barbed smart cables like marionette,bleeding much like the other,smoking and charred by blaster-like energy.He spasmed and jerked at sudden burst of electric energy flown through the cable,and manage to let's out a gurgled yelp.
    Obi was shocked,but move toward the Tusken slowly,but suddenly sensed a stronger life coming up behind him.
    Obi-Wan spun around,his lightsaber ready to stike. It was Anakin,wide-eyed in shock.

    "Anakin," He replied disapprovely.He should have stay outside.

    *********************************************



    [This message has been edited by offsprey5 (edited 01-28-2000).]
     
  9. Darth Pipes

    Darth Pipes Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 1999
  10. Darth Pipes

    Darth Pipes Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 1999
    Here's that post. Sorry for it being late.
    *********************************************

    Darth Maul stood looking out at the star field on the bridge of the Queen's starship. He was reflecting on this recent mission and the future. They would arrive on Naboo in three days where the Queen would sign the treaty, which would allow the Federation to keep control of Naboo. In reality, the Sith would rule the planet.

    Maul smiled. Naboo was only just the beginning. Soon, his master would be in control of the Senate. Then after that they would build an Empire and more planets would come under their control. Corellia, Alderaan, Malastare, Coruscant...they would all bow before the power of the Sith and the New Order. The Jedi? The Jedi would pay for daring to oppose the Sith all those years ago.

    Maul turned around and exited the bridge. He had one more person he had to take care of. The most important of all.

    The Queen.

    Maul entered the cargo room, where all that lay where bodies. Some of them dead. Some of them alive. Maul considered killing them all now but decided against it. He may need them alive. He could use them to help the Queen sign the treaty by threatening to execute them. For now, he would have to lock them up below decks. He would dispose of them later, most likely in a public execution. An example to the people of Naboo, to show them what happens to those who oppose the Sith.

    To his right, he noticed two things. The first one was Padme, the handmaiden. She had tried to convince Maul that she was the Queen. She said it with considerable conviction and Maul had almost believed that she was the Queen. But he knew she wasn't. She was hiding something, the real Queen most likely. Still, he wanted her alive anyway. He might have more...personnal uses for her later.

    The second thing that Maul noticed next to her was the other end of his double-bladed lightsaber. It has survived the explosion caused by his and the padawan's saber coliding. He picked up the lone lightsaber and hooked it to his belt.

    Finally leaving the cargo room, Maul made his way to the lowest deck on the ship. He knew the Queen would be hiding there. He reached the closet door to him. The Queen was there. The slide door was locked but that wouldn't stop him.

    With a wave of his hand, Maul used the Force to blow the door open. He stepped in to find the object of his mission standing right in front of him, trembling in fear. The Queen of Naboo, Amidala.

    Despite her fear, she managed to raise her blaster at Maul. The Dark Lord simply used the Force to slap it out of her hand. The Queen was now trapped, with no where to go.

    Maul approached her menacingly and simply said

    "Your Highness."
    *********************************************

    How was that?

    Darth Pipes

    [This message has been edited by Darth Pipes (edited 01-26-2000).]
     
  11. Darth Pipes

    Darth Pipes Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 1999
  12. fett 4

    fett 4 Chosen One star 5

    Registered:
    Jan 2, 2000
    Cool story but please have Maul fight other Jedi apart fom Obiwan. Your light saber fights are cool.
     
  13. Darth Pipes

    Darth Pipes Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 1999
    Back to the top.
     
  14. The Irish Jedi

    The Irish Jedi Jedi Grand Master star 2

    Registered:
    Aug 17, 1998
    Very interesting plot line. Makes for a good story. I especially like the non-"PG" aspect of it. I wrote a fan-fiction a while back and was severly hampered by my attempt to keep it somewhat in the Lucas tradition of being for kids too. I dig this approach. Please continue.
     
  15. Darth Mulacki

    Darth Mulacki Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 4, 1999
    I like it

    Mulacki
     
  16. Darth Pipes

    Darth Pipes Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 1999
    *********************************************

    In the privacey of his Coruscant apartment, Darth Sidious pulled back his hood to reveal his alter ego, Senator Palpatine. The Senator smiled as he considered the recent course of events.

    His plans had gone better than even he had forseen. Darth Maul had managed to capture the Queen and in three days would be bringing her back to Naboo to sign the treaty. He also had managed to eliminate Qui-Gon Jinn and his apprentice. The two Jedi wouldn't be the only members ones to face their wrath. Soon, the blood of all Jedi would stain the entire galaxy and the Sith would take their rightful place as the masters.

    Palpatine had no doubt that Maul would defeat the two Jedi. Maul was powerful and was proving himself to be an important tool in the Senator's master plan. Still, it was best to make sure Maul didn't become too powerful. That might prove...a problem for him in the future.

    With this phase of his plan complete, Palpatine could now turn his attention to the next phase. Control of the Senate.

    Palpatine checked for the time. He would be meeting Supreme Chancellor Valorum shortly. He would tell the Chancellor exactly what he had been saying just the other day. I don't know what happend to the Queen, sir. I have not heard from her or the Jedi. I fear the worst has happend. The Chancellor, who considered Palpatine his friend, would believe him and tell the Senator he was doing everything he could to find the Queen and resolve the Naboo crisis.

    The fool. If he only knew...
    *********************************************

    Any feedback?

    Darth Pipes


    [This message has been edited by Darth Pipes (edited 01-27-2000).]

    [This message has been edited by Darth Pipes (edited 01-28-2000).]
     
  17. Darth Pipes

    Darth Pipes Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 1999
    Back to the top.
     
  18. Darth Pipes

    Darth Pipes Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 1999
    Just wanted to make a quick update. offsprey5 has edited his 6:24 P.M., 1-24-00 post with the continuation. So search up and read it. I think you will like it because we finally get to see the inside of Darth Maul's ship. Keep up the good work offsprey5!
     
  19. offsprey5

    offsprey5 Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Mar 18, 1999
    Thanks,Darth Pipes. BTW. It's my birthday today.

    *********************************************
    The Sith Inceptor lauched into space as a collective effort between Artoo,Anakin and Obi-Wan. Anakin was able find an emergency laumch sequence on the wrist comlink to start up the main systems. Artoo was able to plug in and bring back ops to the controls in the cockpit and disengage anymore traps that may be set in the ship. Obi-Wan plotted a course to Coruscant.

    Obi-Wan had touched the barely Tusken forehead and used the Force to stablized him.The tusken was now resting in other rooms,as much as a hard parasteel "bed" could be restful.

    Anakin helped dispose of the other one's body,mainly the severed head--the second severed head he has seen today. Artoo began cleaning up the blood with his fire extingisher attachment and some cleaning slovents from Obi-Wan field kit.

    The body was ejected into space. Obi-Wan was mostly expressionless. Anakin only wish had known Tuskens better,this being the second funeral he's been to. He wanted to send him off in a way they would appreciate. But that not possible,the other living Tusken was comatose so he souldn't be asked.

    "i'm sorry," he mumbled to the body as it floated away.

    With that,Obi-Wan want back to the cockpit and actived the hypedrive. The space though the windows became twisted starlines.


    [This message has been edited by offsprey5 (edited 01-29-2000).]

    [This message has been edited by offsprey5 (edited 02-01-2000).]
     
  20. offsprey5

    offsprey5 Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Mar 18, 1999
    oops,sorry. stupid server.


    [This message has been edited by offsprey5 (edited 01-29-2000).]
     
  21. Darth Pipes

    Darth Pipes Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 1999
    Happy Birthday offsprey5!

    Another solid post.
     
  22. Darth Pipes

    Darth Pipes Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 1999
  23. Jedi Windu

    Jedi Windu Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 8, 1999
  24. Amidala22

    Amidala22 Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 20, 1999
    KEWL!!
    I'm Back!
    Hey that was great!! May I continue?

    That post was very elusive !! Thanx I know where to go now .
     
  25. Darth Pipes

    Darth Pipes Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 12, 1999
    Welcome back Amidala22!

    Of course you can continue writing. Just check with offsprey5. He has a very interesting course of events for the characters in the story.

    Darth Pipes
     
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